Get your own Free Home Page
"You’re going to WHAT?!?!"
Mattie reeled, startled at the outburst. After a pause, she continued calmly mixing the batter for her cake. Across the table from her, Caitlin was staring at her with an expression of utter shock. At intervals, her mouth would move to say something, but no words came out. Mattie smiled at her friend as she added another spoonful of flour to her mixture. “I said, that Mark asked me last night to-"
“I know, I know,” Caitlin said impatiently. “I heard all that. I’m just trying to process it.”
“Process what?” Mattie said innocently.
“Did my talk yesterday not even make it through your thick head? I even quoted Tennyson for god’s sake! You’d think a British literature nerd like you would take that into consideration.”
“What are you talking about, Caitlin.”
“Um, excuse me. But did you not just say that Mark asked you to go with Westlife on their tour for the next three weeks?”
“Yes…?”
“Mark Feehily.”
“Yeah.”
“Madeline Rose Margaret O’Shaunessy!”
“What?!”
“What do you mean, ‘what’?! If I’m not mistaken, you are supposed to be getting over a certain someone right about now, and you can’t get over that certain someone if you’re going to be with that certain someone every day and every night for three weeks! Woman, are you mad?”
“Well, it’s not like I’m going just to be with Mark.” Caitlin raised an eyebrow. “I’m not! I have always wanted to go to the States, anyway. And now here’s my chance to go for free! I can’t pass that up, now can I? Of course not. It’ll be a really good experience for me. You know, broaden my horizons. And we’re going to Israel, too! The land of Jesus…” Mattie trailed off sheepishly when she saw that Caitlin wasn’t buying any of it.
“The land of Jesus. Now there’s a pathetic excuse if I ever heard one. I think you’ve been hanging around with Bryan too much. Ugh. Mattie. Mattie, Mattie, Mattie. When are you going to learn?” Caitlin got up from her chair and began to pace around the O’Shaunessy kitchen. “You know, this is not going to help at all. You were not supposed to be hanging around Mark this summer. I was supposed to be helping you hunt for other guys, trying to get you over Mark. This just completely puts a crimp in my plans. Mattie, I’m serious. You can’t keep doing this! You know that you’re just going to spend the next three weeks simpering over Mark, and he won’t have a clue, as usual, and you’ll come back home more in love than ever, and then you’ll be no good to anyone!”
“That’s not going to happen,” Mattie insisted. “And I’m not going just so I can moon over him. I’m not like that, and you know it. You think I’m going to throw away our friendship and everything that we have together now, after all these years? I’m just going to go and whatever happens, happens. My decision has nothing to do with my feelings for Mark, whatever they may be. I’m going because he asked me, and because he needs me right now. I have always been there for him, and I’m not about to abandon him now. Caitlin, please understand.” She looked at her friend with pleading eyes.
Caitlin stood, looking at Mattie with her arms crossed over her chest. “You say you want to be there for him because he needs you,” she said slowly, choosing her words carefully. “But will he be there for you when you need him?”
Mattie looked down. “Whenever I’ve needed him, he has always been there. And that hasn’t and won’t change.”
“What happens when you need him in a different way? Will he be there for you then?” Mattie couldn’t answer her. “Mattie, please think about this carefully. I don’t want you to go and lose yourself in him again. I know you’ve tried to get over him, but think about this carefully Mat. I don’t want you to give your heart and soul to Mark, and be broken hearted when he doesn’t realize what you’re offering to him. I remember how you were when he went away with the group. Mattie, you’re my best friend, and I don’t want to see you hurting like that again.”
“That’s not going to happen,” Mattie said insistently. “I’m not going to get hurt. I won’t let myself. I know that I might have been a little depressed when Mark went away the first time, but what do you expect? He was my best friend, and he was a million miles away. It was expected that I’d be a bit…melancholy.”
“Melancholy? You looked like the living dead. And I thought we’d have to surgically remove you from your room. I don’t want to see you get back into that phase again, Mattie. It’s too hard on you, and it’s hard on us to stand by and watch you slip away from us, just because of Mark.”
Mattie looked surprised at the sharp undertone in Caitlin’s voice. “Are you mad at Mark or something? Because none of that was his fault. He doesn’t – I mean, he didn’t even know about…how I felt.”
“No! I’m not mad at Mark. I love Mark, and I love you too. And you know, there’s nothing I would love more than to see you two together finally. What I don’t love is the thought of the possibility of you slipping back into that stage. Do you know how long it took you and all of us, actually, to get you acting normal again? I’m not looking forward to doing it all over.”
“Well, you won’t have to. I can take care of myself, you know. I can control my own feelings. You really don’t have to worry. It’s not like I’m still in love with him.”
Caitlin rolled her eyes to the ceiling and gave an exasperated sigh. She leaned over and tapped the side of Mattie’s head with a finger. “You think I don’t know how that head of yours works? You keep telling yourself and everyone that you’re not in love and you don’t care, but deep inside, you and I both know that you are, and that you do. I don’t see why you have to be so stubborn about it. Honestly Mattie, sometimes you can be just as thick as Mark.”
“No, it’s not like that anymore. I won’t let myself fall, I promise. Please Caitlin, please don’t be mad at me. I need your support right now, more than anything.”
“Mattie, I’m not mad at you. I just…it’s hard for me to see you go through the pain. Believe me, no guy is worth it. I should know.”
Mattie laughed at Caitlin’s wise expression. “I’ll bet you do. So…you’re really not mad at me?”
“No! Go on your little trip to the states and the Holy Land if you wish, but just remember that I warned you.”
“Believe me, there is absolutely nothing to worry about, I promise. I’m a lot older and wiser than I used to be.”
Caitlin gave her a look. “Sometimes I wonder. Well anyway, I have got to get going. It’s going to be dinnertime soon and you need to finish that cake. Save me a piece, okay?”
“Sure.”
“When will you be leaving for the train to Dublin?”
“In two days. We’ll be leaving at nine in the morning.”
Caitlin groaned. “Are you serious? I’ll have to wake up that early? Ugh! Fine. The things I do for you.”
Mattie grinned as she poured the batter into two baking tins. “And you know I love you for it.”
“Sure, whatever,” Caitlin said waving over her shoulder. She paused in the hallway. “If she doesn’t come back with a certain dark-haired, blue-eyed Irish boy on her arm in three weeks, there’s going to be some serious booty-kicking on my part, and it won’t be pretty.”
Get your own Free Home Page