Chapter 24


Just wanted to let y'alls know that there is a vey special guest appearance in this chapter by Jenn and Shawna! Rock on, you keraaaazy Canadians!


Shane looked down at Mattie while she slept, a pensive expression on his face. His features darkened at the faint tear-streaks on her lovely face. Damn Mark for doing this to her. Sometimes Shane couldn�t believe how unbelievably thick Feehily was. If he could just tell Mark, to make him see�but he couldn�t do that, he had promised Mattie he wouldn�t. But Mattie had never said anything about helping�just a little. An idea had been brewing in his mind for a while, and after everything that had just happened, he knew what he had to do. When he was sure that Mattie was in a deep sleep, he gently disentagled himself from her and slipped off the bed as carefully as possible. He looked down at her as she slept and smiled a little before bending down and giving her a gentle kiss on her head. Shane stood up and took his mobile out of his pocket and quietly stepped out of the room, searching through his saved phone numbers. He had several calls to make, but one important one in particular.

A few minutes later, Shane was in his room, along with Georgina, Nicky, and Bryan. They were all seated around the small round table and Bryan pounded his fist on it authoritatively. �I hereby call this emergency meeting of Operation Mark and Mattie to order!� he said in a commanding tone. Georgina laughed and Nicky rolled his eyes. �Would someone tell me where Agent Egan is?�

Shane gave him an odd look. �Agent Egan?�

Bryan grinned. �Yeah! I have decided that we all needed like, a title or something like that. Oh, and before I forget � � he reached into his pocket and rummaged around while the other three exchanged weird looks. �Ah, here they are!� He handed Shane a button that read �Operation M&M� and under it was inscribed the words �Agent Filan� and under that, in smaller print was the phrase, �Together Or Bust!� and handed Georgina and Nicky their similar ones. �Pretty cool, isn�t it?� Bryan said proudly. �I had them made up yesterday! I was passing by this tourist shop and they made custom made buttons, so I decided to get us all one! And remember, they cannot be worn outside Operation Mark and Mattie meetings, alright?� He waggled his finger at them sternly.

�Just when I thought you couldn�t get any deutzier,� Nicky sighed, shaking his head, although he reluctantly put his button on.

Georgina laughed again as she pinned on her own �Agent Ahern� button. �Well, I love it!� she exclaimed as she admired the badge.

Bryan grinned brightly while he put on his. �See? Georgina likes hers! Now where�s Ki � I mean Agent Egan?�

Shane rolled his eyes. �I dunno, I called him when I called all of you guys, but I guess he got held up for a minute. He�ll be here though, I told him that it was VERY important.� Just then, there was a knock at the door.

�Oh that�s probably him,� Bryan said, jumping up. He went over to the door and opened it. Just as soon as he had opened it, Bryan gasped and slammed the door shut again. Shane, Nicky and G all gave him questioning looks.

�Bryan?� came Mark�s voice from outside. �What the hell are you doing man, open the door!�

�Uhhh�� Bryan gave the three people at the table a panicked look. �Why?�

�I wanna ask Shane if I left my passport in his room, I can�t find it.�

�Um, he�s sleeping! Come back some other time!�

�Sleeping? What are you on about? I just saw him sitting at the table with Nicky and G before you slammed the door in my face! Open up, ya deutz!�

�No, you can�t come in!� Bryan said firmly.

�Why the hell not??�

Bryan let out an exasperated noise, and then opened the door a crack, peering out at Mark. �Because we�re planning your birthday party, alright?! Great, now you�ve gone and spoilt the surprise. I hope you�re happy Feehily.�

Mark stared at Bryan in confusion. �Bryan, it�s almost July. My birthday was in May.�

Bryan made another exasperated noise and rolled his eyes. �That was part of the surprise, DUH!� He began to close the door again, but Mark put his foot in to stop it and pushed open they door a little wider.

�Hey, what�s that?� Mark asked, noticing the button pinned to Bryan�s shirt. Bryan�s eyes grew wide. �Operation M&M? What�s that?�

�Uhhh�� Bryan stalled, trying desperately to come up with an explanation. �Oh, don�t you know? We�re being endorsed by Hershey�s Chocolates now. Our first job is to support the M&Ms here in the States. They�re losing their popularity you know.�

Mark furrowed his brow. �What? How come no one told me this? And aren�t M&Ms made by that Mars company?�

�What are you, the Candy King?� Bryan asked him. �No one likes a know-it-all. Go away!� He pushed Mark back out into the hallway and closed the door. Mark stared at the door in confusion, then shook his head.

�Bryan must really be losing it.� He headed back to his room, and on the way, bumped into Kian, who was coming out of the lift. �Hey Ki,� Mark greeted him. �You off to your room?�

�I was planning to pop by Shane�s room for a bit, need to talk to him about something,� Kian answered.

�Good luck,� Mark said.

�What?�

�Never mind.� Mark started back to his room as Kian went in the direction of Shane�s. �Hey, Ki?� he said.

�Yeah?� Kian replied, turning around.

�Who makes those M&M candies?�

Kian gave him an odd look and shrugged. �I dunno, Hershey�s?�

�Oh. Okay.� Mark nodded uncertainly before finally turning around and going back to his room.

Kian shrugged, then went over to Shane�s door and knocked on it.

�Go away Mark, Shane doesn�t have your passport!� he heard Bryan�s voice bark.

�It�s not Mark, it�s me, Kian.�

There was a pause. �What�s the password?� Kian looked confused. �Password? We don�t have a password, do we?�

Another pause. And then the door opened, and Bryan�s face appeared. �Are you alone?� he whispered.

Kian looked over his shoulder to be sure. �Yeah�.�

�Okay, come in.� Bryan opened the door and stepped back, handing Kian his Operation M&M pin. Kian stared at it, then looked at the other three gathered at the table.

�Don�t ask,� Shane grinned.

Kian shrugged and put the button on. �So what�s this all about? What was this you said about an emergency meeting?� he said as he and Bryan settled themselves in the chairs around the table.

�Yeah, Shane,� Bryan said. �I�m pretty curious as to why you called this meeting meself.�

Shane took a deep breath. �You guys aren�t going to like what I have to say.�

�Uh oh,� Georgina said. �What happened?�

�Do you remember when you guys left me and Mark at that table this morning at Disney World while you tried to find a ride?� They all nodded. �Well, while you were gone, I had a little talk with Mark and�and he basically told me that he was having feelings for Mattie.� Shane put up his hand at the chorus of excited �Finally�s� from the lads and the squeal from Georgina. �Not so fast, everyone,� he warned. �There�s more to this story, and when I tell, you, you�ve all got to promise that you won�t run over and find Mark and beat the living crap out of him.�

�Aw, shoite!� Bryan exclaimed. �What did he do?!�

Shane sighed. �Well, we talked for a bit about it and I convinced him to tell Mattie about the feelings he was having, and at first he didn�t want to, but he eventually agreed to it.�

�So did he talk to her?� Georgina asked nervously.

�Yeah�� Shane said uncomfortably.

�Well?� Nicky prodded. �What happened?�

Shane sighed again. �He had the talk with Mattie this evening, just about an hour ago actually, and he�he��

�What?� Kian asked impatiently.

�He told Mattie that they shouldn�t ruin their friendship and to try to put the feelings behind them and try to get back to normal.� Shane said it all in one quick sentence, and when he finished, there were four dumbstruck people staring at him.

�He what?� Georgina squeaked finally. Shane just shrugged apologetically.

Kian exhaled loudly. �I can�t believe this. I can�t flippin believe it.�

�We were SO close,� Nicky moaned, putting his head down on the table.

�Wait, what about Mattie?� Bryan said worriedly. �How is she? Is she okay?� They all turned to Shane to see what he would say.

Shane shifted a little. �Not � not exactly.�

�Oh the poor thing,� Georgina said sympathetically, biting her lip. �Did you talk to her?�

�Yeah,� Shane said regretfully. �She�s not in such great shape. I think she�s ready to give up. Mark really did a number on her this time.� A heavy silence hung over the room.

�So what now?� Kian asked, breaking the hush that had fallen.

Shane smiled a little. �Well, luckily, I had enough sense to have a back-up plan ready in case Feehily screwed things up.�

Everyone looked interested. �A back-up plan?� Nicky asked curiously. �Whaddya mean by that?�

Shane grinned again. �Well, it took a lot of smooth talk-slash-begging, but by tomorrow, we�re going to have some reinforcements. Some MAJOR reinforcements. If we have anything to do with it, this is FAR from over.�

�Reinforcements?� Bryan asked, confused.

Shane merely kept smiling. �Sit back and I�ll tell you all about it.�


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*later that night*

Georgina opened the door to her and Mattie�s room and slipped in quietly. She changed into her pajamas and got ready for bed as quietly as possible, so as not to wake up Mattie, who seemed to be still sleeping. When she was done in the bathroom, Georgina started to make her way over to her bed, but stopped when her eyes rested on Mattie. Quietly, Georgina walked over and looked sympathetically at Mattie�s face, noticing the trails of dried tears on her cheeks. Why can�t everyone be happy, like me and Nicky? she wondered sadly. Georgina reached out and smoothed back Mattie�s hair in a maternal gesture.

�Don�t worry dear,� she whispered comfortingly. �Help is coming. We�re going to make things right, I promise you Mattie.� With that, she silently went over to her bed and pulled the covers over herself carefully. She looked over at Mattie�s sleeping figure one more time and sighed. She sure hoped Shane knew what he was doing.


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*the next evening*

Mattie leaned her head against the side of the lift as she waited for it to get to her floor. They had arrived in Illinois (that�s fer Allie & Abbie/Abbie & Allie! lol, rock on girls!) that morning. The lads had been gone since early afternoon, performing at a fair or something. Mattie couldn�t really remember. Everything that had happened since last evening had been a blur to her. Last evening�Mattie felt a chill run through her when she remembered the events that had transpired� She had vaguely remembered falling asleep with Shane�s arms wrapped comfortingly around her. When she had woken a few hours later, he was gone, but she had been too tired to care so she just went back to sleep.

Mattie rubbed a hand across her eyes. It had been an early morning for everybody, today was the first day of the Midwestern (I almost wrote Midwestlife�hee hee :) Okay, I will shut up now, I won�t say anything else for the entire chapter, I swear.) leg of the tour, and the hectic schedule was just beginning. They would have to leave for a flight to Ohio that evening, and that would be two flights in twenty four hours. Mattie didn�t know how the lads did this all the time. But then again, this was their dream, and she knew they would do anything for it. The good thing about it for her was that there wasn�t much time for her and Mark to spend together, and she was glad of it. Mattie had tried valiantly to keep up a normal fa�ade around him, and as far as she knew, she had succeeded. Mark didn�t seem to notice if anything was different about her, and if he had, then he hadn�t said anything. But then again, Mattie was good at hiding a broken heart.

The lift opened at her floor and Mattie trudged slowly towards her room. Georgina had gone with the lads to the fair for their performance, but they were probably already back by now, getting ready for the flight. Mattie hadn�t joined them that day, she had told everyone she wasn�t feeling up to it. And it was the truth. She had avoided Shane�s piercing gaze, knowing that he would think she was trying to hide from her problems, but Mattie couldn�t care less. He didn�t understand, this was something that she would have to deal with her own way. Mattie sighed. There were less than two weeks left in the tour anyway. Then she would be back home. It would be easier there, when they wouldn�t have to be around each other so often. Maybe there she could try to achieve a sense of normalcy again.

Mattie finally arrived at her room, fishing around for her key, when she heard voices in the room. She put her ear against the door, trying to make out who was in there. She could hear Shane and Georgina, but there was another familiar voice. Mattie squinted. Could it be�? But no, it couldn�t possibly. But� Mattie shrugged and pushed her key in the slot and opened the door. She stepped inside, but stopped short when she saw who was perched on her bed. Her mouth dropped open in shock as the three people in the room smiled brightly at her. �Caitlin?� Mattie gasped in disbelief. �Is that really you?!�

Caitlin broke into a wide smile. �No, it�s the Irish Fairy of Christmas Past, ya deutzette!�

Mattie remained rooted to her spot, then all of a sudden, started shrieking hysterically and ran towards her friend, who had jumped off the bed. The two girls hugged like mad and then jumped around in a circle holding hands, all the while still screaming up a storm as Shane and Georgina laughed.

�Omigod, what are you doing here?!?� Mattie cried as she hugged Caitlin again.

�Oh you know these popstars, couldn�t go a week without me!� Caitlin answered cheekily.

Of course, Mattie knew there was something else she wasn�t saying, but she put it aside for now. She was absolutely elated that Caitlin was there, and didn�t want to bother questioning it just yet �How long are you saying?� she asked excitedly. Caitlin�s familiar presence was enough to make Mattie�s despondent mood rise immediately.

Shane came over and draped an arm around them both. �Oh, she�s gonna be here until the end of the tour.�

Mattie�s eyes widened and she smiled widely. �Really? That�s great! I�m so excited!�

�We thought you and G might want some more company, so we figured, hey, Caitlin�s never does anything productive, she might was well not do anything productive over here with us!� Shane joked.

�Watch it, Filan,� Caitlin warned him, smiling.

Mattie hugged Caitlin again. �AAH, I�m sooo happy! We�re going to have such a riotous time, you and me and G! Does everyone else know you�re here?�

�Yep, I got a lovely welcome from all the lads, and now the rest of them are in their rooms packing for the flight tonight.� Caitlin sighed and shook her head. �Another flight! Just what I need after flying here nonstop from Dublin!�

Shane laughed. �You know you couldn�t have refused coming.�

�A free tour of America? You made it hard to turn down!�

Shane smiled and pinched Caitlin�s cheek. �Well, I hope you�ll have fun, cheeky. But for now, I�ve got to go and finish me own packing, so I�ll see you girls later!� He turned around and left the room, but Mattie followed him out.

�Shane?�

He turned around again. �Yeah?�

Mattie came up and gave him a hug around the neck before kissing his cheek. �Thank you.�

�For what?�

�For bringing Cait out here. You knew how to make me feel better and get my mind off of�you know.�

�Yeah�� Shane said, a small smile on his lips. �Well, you go on now, we�ve got a flight to catch.�

�Okay.� Mattie gave him one last hug before heading back to her room. Shane stood in the hall for a moment, thinking. Getting her mind off Mark? Shane grinned mischievously. Little did she know, Caitlin�s purpose was the exact opposite. In fact, considering that Shane & Co. had run out of ideas on their own, Caitlin was the last hope for Operation Mark and Mattie. He had called her yesterday and filled her in on all the details of the events that had transpired, then begged her to come out and help them try and fix it. It had taken a lot to convince her to come on such short notice, but in the end, Caitlin had agreed, and Shane had her on the next flight out of Dublin. Now that the reinforcements had finally come, it was time to do some real brainstorming.


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Within a few hours, they were all on another plane, heading towards Ohio. The lads and Anto were sitting in a cluster of seats as Anto outlined the schedule for the next week. Georgina had fallen asleep and Mattie and Caitlin were sitting together. Caitlin had her headphones on and her eyes were closed, but Mattie poked her anyways.

�Caitlin�Caitlin!� Mattie poked her in the side harder, which finally woke her up.

�Jeez, okay, I�m awake!� She rubbed her side. �What�s the matter?�

Mattie looked over her shoulder to see if any of the lads were nearby. When the coast was clear, she turned back to Caitlin. �I guess Shane told you everything that happened.�

Caitlin smiled sympathetically. �Yeah, he did�are you okay?�

Mattie managed a thin smile. �I�m fine. Nothing I can�t handle�I�ll be fine.�

Caitlin studied her friend carefully, then slowly nodded. �Alright then, I�ll let that go for now. Just don�t�don�t shut him out, okay? And don�t shut yourself out either. I don�t want to see what happened last time happen again.

Mattie�s face clouded over. She knew what Caitlin meant. �You don�t have to worry.�

Caitlin gave Mattie one last searching look before settling back into her seat and putting her headphones on again. She hoped that she wouldn�t have to worry either.


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That evening, they were all gathered in Nicky and Kian�s room, relaxing after a hectic day of performances and interviews. There had been three performances that day alone, and the lads were knackered, lazing about the room, vegging out and enjoying an increasingly rare moment of idleness. Mattie was sitting on the floor, propped up against the bed as Caitlin French braided her hair, with Kian as her trusty hair assistant. Shane and Nicky were playing cards at the table, and Mark and Georgina were parked in front of the television set, watching an episode of Friends. Everything was rather peaceful, a sharp contrast to the chaotic day everyone had experienced. Bryan lay sprawled across Nicky�s bed, sleeping lightly. He sat up and yawned. �I think I�m going to me own room to sleep,� he announced as he got up and headed towards the door. �See you all tomorrow morning.�

�Good night Bryan!� they all chorused as he disappeared from the room.

Suddenly, they heard a piercing scream from next door. At the sound, everyone looked at each other with wide eyes. �Was that Bryan?� Caitlin questioned, her eyes wide.

�HELP ME! HELP ME! HELLLLLP MEEEE!!!!�

Instinctively, everyone jumped up from where they were sitting. Georgina covered her hands with her mouth and Mattie grabbed Kian�s hand, who was nearest, and squeezed it tightly, frightened out of her wits. In fact, everyone looked scared, because that had been a scream of pure terror.

�Oh God, what�s happened to him?� Georgina managed to say weakly. Immediately, the whole group began to make their way out into the hall, where the scream had come from. The first thing they saw was a terrified looking Bryan holding on to the doorknob to his and Mark�s room and leaning backwards in order to keep it closed.

�Bryan, what�s the matter, mate?� Shane exclaimed.

Bryan turned his head to face them, not letting go of the door. �GIRLS, GIRLS!!!� he shrieked hysterically.

�What?� Mattie looked utterly lost. �Bryan, have you lost your mind? What are you talking about, what girls? Are you talking about us? We�re right here.� She cast a glance at Georgina and Caitlin who both looked completely dumbfounded.

Bryan shook his head vigorously. �NOT YOU! GIRLS! GIRLS! NAKED GIRLS!�

Kian shook his head in disbelief. �Naked girls? Bryan, what in hell are you talking about?�

Bryan took a hand off the doorknob and pointed frantically at the door. �NO! GIRLS! IN THERE! TWO OF THEM! NAKED!�

A look of understanding dawned on Mark�s face. �Are you saying there are two naked girls in our hotel room?�

�YES!!!� Bryan screamed again.

Nicky stared at Bryan in shock for another minute. Then he let out a chuckle. And another. And another. Soon, he was practically on the floor convulsing in laughter. It was contagious, and soon the rest of them were laughing so hard, they were practically crying. With the exception of Bryan. He was staring at the merry little group as if they had lost their minds.

�WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS LAUGHING AT?!� he shrieked hysterically. �THIS IS NOT FUNNY! WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!� Bryan looked to be on the verge of complete panic. In fact, he looked like he was about to start crying. Bryan started to make little whimpering noises. �Please, I don�t want naked girls in my room,� he said pathetically. �Please, get them out.�

�Well, don�t expect ME to do it,� Kian said, holding up his hands.

�Me neither,� said Mark.

�Well, I�M not gonna,� Shane declared.

�I�ll do it,� Nicky volunteered. He winced when Georgina hit him.

�Oh no you are not,� she said warningly.

Caitlin sighed. �Oh you men are such babies. Here, I�LL do it.� She stepped up and shooed Bryan away from the door.

�Caitlin, are you sure-� he began.

She waved her hand dismissively at him and opened the door to step inside. The rest of the waited outside and held their breaths to see what would happen. They found out soon enough.

�Oh my SWEET lord!� came her voice from inside the room. �Well, what do you know, he wasn�t kidding. Just what in HELL do ye two think yer doing? Have you no shame? Fer chrissake. What has this world come to? And just what did you think you two would accomplish by stripping down and sprawling yourselves all over a poor little innocent popstar�s bed? Did you think he would just come in and find you there and say, �Hey, you two nekkid girls! You're the ones I want to spend the rest of my life with!� and then hop on the cot? Have ye gone mad or what? Come on now, where�s yer heads?�

By now, everyone outside was rolling around in the hallway, dying of laughter, imagining Caitlin lecturing the two mystery girls in the hotel room. �You two must feel like right prats right now, dontcha?� Caitlin�s voice continued as everyone else struggled to hear her through their laughter. �This is disgraceful! What would yer mothers say? Shame on you both. Will ye git yer clothes on, you dreadful lot!� There was a pause. �Is that all the clothes ye brought with ya? Jaysus, where are the rest of them? Can ye not afford to buy a whole outfit, then? Or you just enjoy walking around in public in that? People have no decency nowadays. It�s amazing you�ve not been picked up by the police yet, going about in the evening dressed in those clothes. Or lack thereof, I suppose I should say. Are you done yet? Now get your skanky American arses out of here before I bitch-slap ye both. Get on, now! Shoo!�

Everyone out in the hallway, who had been shrieking with laughter the entire time, sobered up just quickly enough to see two rather *cough*scantily clad*cough* girls exit the room sheepishly, not making any sort of eye contact with the lads. Caitlin followed a few seconds later and stepped into the hall, clucking her tongue and shaking her head sorrowfully. Everyone tried desperately to keep their laughter in as they watched the two girls scurry towards the elevator, which couldn�t open up fast enough.

The two girls stood nervously in front of the lift. Suddenly one of the reached up and smacked the other upside the head.

�Ow! What was that for?�

�Yo Jenn, I TOLD we shouldn�t have tried this, beeotch!�

�Eh? Shawna, what are you talking aboot, eh? This was YOUR idea biznatch!� (author�s note: LM mother freakin AO!!!)

�What?! That is keraaazy talk, this was all part of YOUR master plan to seduce the Irish boyband.�

�Oh, you wanna throw down? Right here?�

�Now now ladies,� Bryan broke in as he came over to them. �No need to get all hot and bothered. I appreciated the sentiment, really.� He put his arm around they two girls and they both looked up at him in shock.

�Jigga wha??� Jenn said. (another author�s note: lmao again. Oh crap! I promised to shut up! I totally forgot! Forgive me please).

�Yeah, don�t worry about it. Eveyone makes mistakes right?� Bryan smiled brightly at them. �And you two seem to be um�.sweet. I guess.� At that, the others began to cough loudly into their hands at this and Bryan shot them a warning look. �Now girls, I�m very sorry for reacting the way I did, I guess I�m just sort of an innocent, inexperienced type of lad, you know what I�m saying?� The coughing behind him got considerably louder and Bryan rolled his eyes. �Don�t mind them,� he said. �So,� he began conversationally. �What�s your names?�

�Ummm�.I�m Shawna, and this is Jenn.�

�Nice to meet you Shawna and Jenn,� Bryan said, shaking their hands cordially. �Were you at one of the shows today?�

�Yeah!� they exclaimed in unison. �We thought you guys were fantastic! Especially you Bryan! We thought you were great!�

�Did you now?� Bryan said, pleased. �Hey, tell ya what. Why don�t we all forget about that little incident back there and I take you two out to dinner and we can get to know each other the right way?�

�Oh my God�� Shane said before he could stop himself.

Bryan turned around. �Yeah, why don�t we all go out to eat together? It will be a good chance to get to know some of our fans, right lads?�

*crickets chirping*

�Erm�sure, why not!� Kian said finally, trying to hide his amused grin.

�Jigga wha? Are you guys friggin� serious??� Jenn asked incredulously.

�Sure!� Bryan said.

�Bryan,� Shawna whispered.

�Yeah?�

�Is that girl who yelled at us coming? She�s kinda scary.�

�Nah, she�s alright. She meant well. Don�t worry about her, I�ll make her behave.� Shawna looked relieved. �So come on then, let�s all get a bite to eat!� The lift opened at that interval and the three of them got inside. �Well?� Bryan asked the others who where still standing in the middle of the hallway. One by one, they hesitantly got into the lift. This was going to be an interesting night.


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Mattie climbed into her bed and sighed as her head hit the pillow. Georgina was already sound asleep in her own bed, and Caitlin was sleeping in a cot in Shane�s room, as he was the only one without a roommate. Mattie couldn�t be more thankful that Caitlin was here. She knew that she had Shane to thank for it, and she couldn�t be more grateful. Mattie wondered what kinds of strings he had pulled to get her on the tour, but she was eternally indebted to him for doing it. Shane knew how much she needed Caitlin, especially now, when�but there, she had to stop thinking about that. Mattie�s mind searched for something to keep her mind off of�off of that nagging feeling in the back of her head. She smiled, remembering the dinner earlier that evening. It hadn�t been quite so awkward as they had thought, the girls, Jenn and Shawna, were quite amusing and entertaining, and all in all, it had been a rather comical evening. In fact she had hardly even thought about�

Mark.

Mattie made an irritated noise and covered her face with her hands. Why did everything always come back to him? She was angry at herself. Angry not only because he seemed to be everywhere she turned, but because she was the one who had let this happen. Mattie had sworn to herself that she wouldn�t fall again. But she had. She had let herself believe that Mark could have actually wanted to be with her. Now Mattie wondered how she could have been so stupid. And so weak. And now she was paying for it, with a pain and a hurt that seemed to get sharper every time she even looked at him. How did I let this happen? Mattie wondered despairingly to herself. Caitlin had been right, back in Sligo. She had known this would happen, and she had warned Mattie against it, but Mattie had refused to listen. She thought she had been strong enough, but all it took was one different look from those blue eyes, one misread meaning in his touch�and she had fallen.

A tear slid down Mattie�s cheek and she wiped it away angrily, with a shaking hand. She took a deep breath to calm herself. Only a few more days, Mattie reminded herself. Then you�ll be home. Then you can get past this. She didn�t do a very good job of convincing herself. The days stretched out before her like an eternity, and Mattie knew that each day would be a struggle. A struggle to make sure she wouldn�t fall any deeper. A struggle to make sure that Mark would never suspect.

Chapter 25


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