Girls
Girls are the spawn of satan. Here we explain it all.
Written By Mila. To inform all those who deserve to know.
I hate girls. I have only a handful of female friends. Girls are evil. They're a far worse evil than most have ever even imagined. Girls are cruel and manipulative. They're whiny and bitchy and dumb. They obsess about clothes and shopping and trivial things and talk about boys constantly. They get mad at stupid things, like their boyfriends going to strip clubs. They have their own language: Crazy Fucked Up Chick Language. And its counterpart: Crazy Fucked Up Chick Magic. These two tools are inborn and applied to scramble the brains of unsuspecting boys. I have made it my personal goal to use my insight to this pathetic world to inform and arm confused males throughout the world. Or at least in my social circle.
First- Crazy Fucked Up Chick Magic. This tool, employed to get a male to do anything the female wants, is the more powerful of the two. This can range from a simple vocal plea, to a playful pouty lip, to a fullblown onslaught of tears. The task that is sought can me as meanial as getting a fork. Perhaps the application of makeup on said boy. The purchase of something. At times it proves to be useful in situations of extreme laziness. Do not, however, confuse Crazy Fucked Up Chick Magic with actual need. Though confusing, these are two seperate entities.
On to the language aspect. First and formost- No always means no. Yes often means no. And more often than not, maybe means no. When a girl says "You stay until your company is gone, then come over-I'll leave the door unlocked" Very rarely does it actually mean that. More often than not it means "You stay here, I want to be alone". When a girl says "it's not you, it's me" it never usually means that. If she means it really is her, she's probably got a boyfriend already. Or she can't remember what she was thinking. "I hate you" on the other hand, almost always means that. Or sometimes it means "I actually love you, but you're a dick". Then there's "I'm fine". If a girl says this to you and it's very clear she isn't, it's more than likely your fault. It can also mean she wants effort put into making her feel better. If a girl has her monthly for longer than seven days or more often than once a month, more than likely she doesn't like you any more, and may in fact be cheating. Same goes for "I have a headache" and "I don't feel well" also "I'm tired". There are far too many phrases to go through here, but I believe the point is made.
Girls will also act like another girl is their best friend in the whole world, and the second that girl is out of earshot a lot of shit is spoken about her. Lies are spread. Deciet all around. The second girl will usually have just as many obsenities to speak about the first.
A girl will also plot to steal another girl's boyfriend while pretending to be friends with her. This plot is used far too often.
Bitches
There's these girls. This certain species. They're called Bitch. They're catty and full of themselves. They treat everyone like shit. They're teases and into fucking up your head. They can be downright cruel to males.
Yet these are the most popular girls in schools. These are the ones with lines of boys waiting for their turn to be abused and thrown away. Then they get back into line for more!
This species of girl is the most intolerable. I urge you all to cease contact with them, stop encouraging their actions. These are the worst kinds of girls. Those of us who are normal (oh, how few of us there are) are made to look bad because of these girls in particular. We have to fight as it is to not be classified with girls in general, but Bitches make it hard for us to break down barriers. Bitches ruin guys. The nice ones become assholes. Or they get scared. Or decide to go gay.
In conclusion, girls are wicked and not to be trusted.
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