For those of you who don't know, I have ADD and ADHD. Because of this I have a fairly erratic mode of thinking, very fragmented. This may explain my writing on this site. Basically my train of thought is more like an airport terminal of thought. Allow me to elaborate on this point a bit further.

Most people have one track in their mind that they follow until their objective, the solution to their problem or their conclusion to their logical sequence of thoughts. This should make sense to most people. I mean logically; thought process should go (Initiating thought or query) A -> (Brainstorm Possible solutions to the problem) B -> (Contemplation of consequences of different actions and solutions to problem) C -> (Selection of appropriate solution, response or action) D. So it's a very clear process. A ->B ->C ->D

My mind works a bit differently. As my analogy above, it's more like an airport terminal then a train. I have many thoughts going at once. I mean I can be thinking about one general topic, while at the same time be singing a song in my head, wondering what's for dinner, daydreaming about the weekend and writing a test. I basically have the one airport terminal, my mind, and i have flights taking off all the time. It's fairly poorly organized as flights constantly get rerouted, some flights are in the air so long that they crash due to lack of fuel, while others meander into the bermuda triangle. Sometimes a flight will drop off a developer or two and they'll set up a smaller terminal to run concurrently. The smaller terminal is what I call the dream terminal. I daydream a lot, and usually it goes along-side my normal life, so I'm basically living two lives, my dream one and the real one.

Now my day-dreaming is a huge extension of my ADD, and to me it almost borders on schizophrenia. My daydreams are typically fairly consistent for short terms. For example; for about 3 weeks I would daydream about how I wanted prom to turn out. Each time it was basically the same, just each time I relived it I fleshed it out a bit more, carried it a bit farther along. In some of my longer lasting day-dreams, typically 1-2 months, I would remake myself how I wanted myself to be. Usually not by simply being someone else, but by having some event occur that changed me.

One of these events that I frequently day-dreamed was a portal that is opened to another part of the multiverse where time travels differently and i am given a kind of temporary immortality, just meaning that I don't age while there. When I'm in this other dimension I fight in many wars, live thousands of years and generally better myself, then I am returned to my own time and place to battle a threat coming to Earth.

Now this may sound all very childish, wishful and utterly pointless but I have found a use for it; my writing. In my head I flesh out all this incredibly detailed worlds and scenarios for myself so why not write them down and share them for other people's entertainment or benefit. This is why I created this site. I can piece together my stories as I flesh them out in my mind. That's why everything on here is piecemealed together slowly. Like NIALL for instance. Some of them have been completed in my head though, they just need to be written down, and that takes precious time, time which a poor engineerig student doesn't commonly have.

Anyway, now that I've explained my thought process to you, perhaps I'll give you an example of how my mind would typically be running in a day. First thing in the morning I wake up and see a piece of chewed gum stuck to the bottom of my desk corner. My first thought is that there is a hell of a lot of chewed gum in the world, there must be some kind of use for it all. I mean it should be able to be recycled into like slingshots or shoesoles or something. Then I remembered seeing that the KFC forks were made of recycled plastic and so were the port-a-potties in Argonaut, and I shuddered at the possibility that one could be made into the other. Then I realized that UNB goes through an insane amount of paper daily, yet has no rooms or anything for recycling paper. Odd for a university with Forestry and ecology programs. I remember working in the library over the summer. THere was shitload of paper went through that frigging camp and so much of it just went to the blue bins anyway, and those things were amazingly heavy man, I mean, it's not untill you lift about 50,000 sheets of paper stuffed into a triply reinforced garbage bag that you relaize paper is just condensed trees.

So I finally get out of bed, and it's about 7:30, a half hour later then what I normally wake up at, so looking at the clock reminds me of Gagetown, and on my way to the shower I think about OHS and the crazy stuff we used to do, which leads to remembering Colin moved out to the Ukraine, which then prompts me to remember to call Rico cuz in January he moves to Germany. Germany reminds me of the European techno I had in my room, which I have been having a hard time locating, which leads to remembering that Kerri Barron, my sgt. on B Company this summer, is on campus somewhere and I have to find her.

So on my way to the shower I realize halfway that I forgot my soap, and have to run back, time's running late now. I shower trying not to fall asleep, then I run back into the room and grab my stuff and my cd-player. As I run down to Head hall the main theme for Metal Gear Solid 2 comes up. The end of the song always evokes the image of a government operative sinking into a river, wih a bullet wound in his back, slowly dying, yet his mission was completed so he is satisfied in death.

This reminds me of GI JOe actually, I just bought a GI Joe season 1 set of DVD's the other day and then I found out they came out with a whole new movie. I loved the old movie and I had a copy on tape but one day my mom taped over it with the movie Darkman. The writer of that movie was a total waste of sperm I tell ya. If he's still breathing my air.... Yeah, so I miss my old GI Joe movies, I mean I had a whole bunch of the toys and the id cards that went with them, Sewer rat was my hero. Then they took it off the air. Along with TMNT. Ah, the late 80's and early 90's were the times eh? The cartoons were awesome, the toys were superb and the NES was da BOMB. Then there was SNES. Those had the greatest rpg's ever. I loved final fantasy 2, I've never been able to find a hard copy of Final Fantasy 1 for NES. That sucks, cuz I really want one. That and Dragon Warrior 2. That is the biggest regret of my gaming/collecting life. I used to sit the bargain shop while mom was shopping and look through the used NES games, and one day I came across Dragon Warrior 2. I loved the first one. It was my first rpg and I played it religiously. I remember when my brother Matthew used to play that when he was living with us for our first year in Gagetown. I wanted to play it sooo bad, but I never got to until a couple years later. And I was hooked. I was actually down in Halifax over the christmas break and I spent some time at Matthew's place. We stayed up and watched Gangsters movies and played PS2 all night. He actually lent us FFX and Metal Gear Solid 2 for a couple of months. Which is awesome. We still have them. I wonder if he's coming up for christmas again to get them... Last ime he was up they had the sims on PS2, that was awesome too. Oh man, I soo want to play the new sims, I hope it's as customizable as the first one. I always had mine filled with like 800 items more then normal. I mean my houses were awesome. I had one where one sunroom was made entirely out of glass walls, and floors. Below it there was a garden. It looked really spiffy. I think I made it in the lot where the Goth's were originally. They were useless. Mortimer was all right but in my first game I played, the wife toasted herself while cooking and killed herself and the kid. Then I discovered the trick of marrying people to get their money and then killing them by locking them in a pool until they fell asleep and drowned. It was cruel, but efficient. Soemthing like the tricks I used to use when playing reoller coaster tycoon. I liked that game, but it got old after a while. All the tycoon games did really. Fast Food Tycoon was cool, but way hard. The comps were supergeniuses and I didn't have a manual so I couldn't figure out pizza recipes, so I failed horribly. It's always neat to find an old manual for an NES game though, my favorite was Zelda, I don't know why, but it just brings back fond memories. I liked reading archie comics too, those always bring me back to the days of reading in the hammock by the cottage, after jet-skiing and so on in the lake. I also loved to read them in the co-op whn mom was shopping. Oh that reminds me, I was talking about Dragon Warrior 2, yeah I didn't have any money and I couldn't buy it, and mom wouldn't give me money so I had to go home and come back the next day and buy it, but when I came back, it was gone. Biggest regret of my life. Haven't been able to find it since. So... what was I originally talking about? Aw, screw it, I'm too far off track. This is the end I guess.