"Welcome to Elysium"

Hello guys (and girls), and welcome to Elysium!  I am your Hostess, GoddessOfWar: but you can call me Mars.  (Anyone who notices the playing of words and titles gets a cookie!).

Well, this is just the introductory editorial to my *new* column!  Wow, special, and I suppose now wouldn’t be the time to say my only column, heh.  I guess I should tell you guys a little about myself, just so we all feel warm and fuzzy together.  Well, I’m 19 years old and am living in Southern Ontario with my Dad, brother, dog and cat.  My friends are also over a lot, so I guess they kinda live here too . . . Well, anyhoo!  I’m a trained cook (am still going to culinary college) and I’m joining the army soon.  I don’t want to work for money; I want to work for people.  This whole consumer nation and “more more more” and “money money money” just doesn’t do it for me.  Slaving away, wasting your life for stuff and money just so you can retire and die, having done nothing productive just doesn’t appeal to me.  I’m also embittered and cynical, so I suppose that also taints my view.  As well, the army thing is to serve my country.  Plus, it runs in the family.  They’re actually PROUD of me (and my brother is close on my heels so it’s both grandchildren going into the service) and that’s important.  I’m pretty close to my family: we’re family centric.  It’s mostly matriarchal, well, my English side is at least.  Great-grandmother rules the roost.  Er, and my cat needs to learn how to meow properly and my dog . . .she’s just . . . yeah.  Cute though.  And fluffy.

My favourite colours are black, turquoise and freshly-splattered red :D.  I could be joking on the last one.  Perhaps.  Lol.  I love sushi and sashimi, happen to be lactose intolerant and in love with cheesecake, and don’t eat red meat.  Pork, beef, lamb . . . anything with four legs is no.  Except my dog.  I swear, if she pisses me off one more time I’m gonna make her fur into a rug and roast her body on a spit.  Of course, I threaten her with this on a near daily basis, so perhaps she just ignores me now . . .

What else about me?  Well, obviously I love games or else I wouldn’t be taking my time out to do this.  And more than just video games: I love soccer and used to be a goalie.  When I was a kid I was a figure skater and a dancer.  This is the first year in a decade I haven’t played soccer.  Damn school.  My interests include ancient history/anthropology, archaeology, philosophy and law.  These absolutely fascinate me; so do body piercings (which I have) and tattoos (which I don’t yet have).  :)

Happy happy . . . okay, well, the games I usually play are Tom Clancy, RPG . . . well, really anything I guess if it strikes my fancy.  I have NES, N64, GC and Xbox.  But most of my energy goes into my Xbox, then my Gamecube.  On top of gaming I love to read and write, and I’m such a loser because I actually write fan fiction.  Splinter Cell fan fiction as of now, to be exact.  That is one game I love and adore perhaps too much.  Well, I’m not an SFF for nothing! 

I guess now that you know a little about me I should talk about what this column is gonna be all about.  Basically I’m going to play games, review them, write up on them, say my bit; you know, the usual.  And I want to take requests by you.  If there’s a game you’re curious about (should I buy it, is it fun), ask me about it and I’ll try to write up on it.  Additionally, I will write about games that are coming out and you can ask me about those too – kinda like gossip mongering!  Yes, we’ve got it all here folks!  I could also help with walkthroughs if there are parts of games that you just don’t get (why did this happen, or what does this mean?) or seem to be unable to beat. 

On top of that, I’ll just give my opinion about things in games that hit home.  Or that interest me.  It could also be about a part of a game that pertains to real life.  You know, lessons and values and such.  Don’t be expecting any fluffy happy gooey stuff here though.  None of those “we can all get along if we just play nice!” lessons here.  More of: “if you don’t like my rules, get out of my playground” lessons.  Or some such.  Perhaps a quote would finish clearing that up: “The world is small, nasty and complicated, and everybody dies alone.” – Sam Fisher.

Remember, if I wanted your opinion, I’d give it to you! 

I’m just joking.  But seriously, I hope you guys enjoy.  I’m looking forward to filling you in, learning more about games and just generally having fun.
 

That’s my spare change.
                Mars