Poor Schu-Schu!!! Bwhahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WARNINGS: Insaneness, BARTOK THE MAGNIFICENT!, OOC-ness, bats, headaches

A Happy Farfello

Idea from Lunari-chan and Skylar-chan

Written by Skylar-chan

Schuldrich was bored. Crawford was reading a newpaper, Nagi was typing with his mind again and Farfello was just being Farfello and so, he had nothing to do.........or did he?

He concentrated on Crawford and got "I need new golf clubs." Schuldrich winced and hurridly went on to Nagi.

And got "Tot, I wonder where Tot is? I want to see her." Giggling Schuldrich moved on to Farfello.

He was rambling in his thoughts about - what else? - hurting God, "God! You killed my family and look! Now I hurt the body you gave me! Bwahahaha!!!.................zipzappattererpatpoffzoupzek!! .......... ONCE IN MONGOLIA I NOTICED A FIRE, WHOLE CITY BURNING AND THE FLAMES GETTING HIGHER, THEY'RE YELLING "SAVE US OR WE'RE ALL GONNA BAKE!" I ATE THE FLAMES AND THEN I DRANK THE WHOLE LAKE! THEY CALLED ME, " Schuldrich raised an eyebrow, not beleiving that Farfello was thinking. "BARTOK THE MAGNIFICENT! THE SPECIFICALLY, TERRIFICALLY MAGNIFICENT! A MAMMAL SO INFLAMMABLE HE SAVED THE DAY! I TELL YOU, B-A-R-T-OK!"

Schuldrich pulled his thoughts away from Farfello - he was getting a headache from all the yelling going on inside of the insane killer's head. Who was Bartok anyway? He sat up and rubbed his aching temples causing Crawford to look at him inquiringly.

"What's wrong Schuldrich?"

Schuldrich looked at him with wide eyes and pointed to Farfello, "He's crazy, just crazy."

Crawford raised an eyebrow, "We knew that already."

Schuldrich shook his head, "Not like he his now. "

Nagi turned away from his computer, "What's he doing now?"

"If I have to go listen to that again, you two are going to hear it also." Schuldrich went back into Farfello's thought's - dragging Nagi's and Crawford's identies along with him.

They heard, "ONE TIME IN HUNGARY THIS DRAGON APPEARS. HE'S VERY "HUNGARY" NO DINNER IN YEARS! AND THEN HE GRABS ME AND I'M PRACTICALLY THROUGH! So I summon all my strength and using his weight against him I throw him off me and give one to the solar pexlus and then two to the kidneys! HE WAS DEFEATED 'CAUSE I KNEW MY KUNG FU! THAT'S WHY I'M BARTOK THE MAGNIFICENT! WITH A HA! AND A HI-YA! THAT ARE SIGNIFICANT! THAT DRAGON HASN'T EATEN SINCE THAT FATEFUL DAY! THANKS TO B-A-R-T-OK!"

Schuldrich shudderingly drew away from Farfello's interesting thought's.

Nagi held his head in his hands, "What the hell was that?"

"I don't want to know, and you are not making me go back in there to find out!" retorted Schuldrich angrily.

Crawford looked over at Farfello his lips a thin white line, "I think that maybe some punishment time is in order, just until he shut's up - because I don't Schuldrich is going to be able to concentrate on anything until Farfello does."

And so, to the punishment room they brought Farfello and hung him upside down in his strait jacket. Instead of being accompanied by Farfello's usual screams of rage a look of soft astonishment filled his face.

Nagi looked at Farfello worridly, "Why isn't he screaming?"

"See I knew something was wrong!" Crowed Schuldrich as his glasses slipped over his eyes. Grumbling he pushed them back up.

"Maybe if we take off the gag we'll learn something." Suggested Crawford.

"Maybe." Nagi did however remove the gag.

"Ano...........hey Skylar! Were in Farfie's body!!!!!!!!!"

"Yaaaaa!!!!!!!!! Wait. Now I'm ugly!!!!!!!! Lunari!!!!!!!!!"

"Farfie's not ugly! He's just a little scarred!!!"

"And you don't mind the fact that now you are the one who is scarred?"

A brief silence followed that, then, "I never thought of it that way before. Oh well!! *grins* Let's go!!"

"Ah, Lunari."

"Nan da to?"

"We're hanging upside down in a strait-jacket you baka!!"

*sniffles* "That hurt."

"Bwahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Maybe we can ask them to let us down."

"Them? *glances around* WAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S SCHU-SCHU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Letmedownletmedoewnletmedown!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to hug him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Schuldrich drew back away from the gibbering Farfello and hid behind Crawford.

"Thanks Skylar, now we'll never get down!!!!!"

"We won't? WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Nagi slapped his hands over his ears and fled the room, closely followed by a distraught Schuldrich and an impassive Crawford.

Once out of the room Nagi looked at Crawford," What happened to him? He's never been so, ah, exuberant before."

"Exuberant?" Moaned Schuldrich, "It's me he wants to hug!"

"Don't worry, I'm sure that hanging upside down for a while will make him lose some of that uncharacteristic happiness that's come over him." Reassured Crawford.

Schuldrich looked hopeful,"You really think so? 'cause I've got that stupid song stuck in my head now "Once in Mongolia I noticed a fire".........Argh!!"

Crawford smiled evilly, "No I'm just saying that to make you feel better."

Schuldrich looked sick.

A FEW HOURS LATER...........

Nagi walked back into the house from his ah, meeting with Tot and glanced around at the other two members of Schwartz, "Shouldn't Farfello be taken down by now?"

Schuldrich shook his head, "Go see for yourself why he is still up there."

Nagi slowly walked over to the room in which they held Farfellow and glanced in - then he recoiled in horror. Farfello was swinging back and forth on his strait-jacket yelling at the top of his lungs "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"See? We can't let him down in that condition. " Schuldrich shuddered, "And he still wants to hug me. I walked into the room earlier and he started chanting my name and trying to get down with the scariest smile of his face."

"This isn't good. How are we supposed to complete missions with him in this condition?" Asked Nagi as they walked back to the living room (the opposite of the dead room) with the sounds of more WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE's coming from behind them.

Crawford entered the room with an expression of dismay very lightly stamped accross his face, "We have a mission and it's going to take all of us."

Schuldrich buried his face in his hands.

Nagi looked dismayed.

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

They all winced.

A FEW MINUTES LATER..............

"Farfello, do you understand what you have to do?" Asked Crawford after he had finished explaining the mission.

Farfello scrunched up his nose, "Ewwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!! It's Crawford!!!!!!!!!!"

Crawford picked up a golf club and wacked Farfello over the head with it.

"Ow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That wasn't very nice you know!!!!!!! Meanie!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Farfello pointed at Crawford, "Meanie! Meanie! Crawford is a meanie!!"

Schuldrich edged away from the accusing Farfello, trying to hide his laughter for fear of getting wacked with it himself.

Nagi was gratefully in another room.

Crawford stared open mouthed at Farfello - not being able to respond to the chanting of an insaner than normal Farfello.

"Close your mouth Crawford, you are not a cod fish."

Crawford wacked Farfello with the golf club again.

Farfello held his head in his hands, "Okay, okay you win. I'll listen, but only because you have the evil golf club of doom.......asshole."

Schuldrich snickered.

Crawford wacked Schuldrich over the head with the golf club.

"We are going to attack Weiss." He spat. "They have decided that Weiss needs to be eliminated and have choosen us for the job."

Farfello brightened, "Weiss?!"

Nagi entered the room and sighed, "Yes Farfello, Weiss."

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! I get to meet Weiss!! I get to meet Weiss!! YAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Farfello began jumping up and down clapping his hands in glee.

"Ah, Farfello, we have to kill Weiss..............." Schuldrich trailed off as Farfello bounced out of the room estaticly, not hearing him at all.

Crawford sighed, "At least he's coming."

IN THE CAR ON THE WAY TO KILL WEISS..................

"This is the song that never ends!! It goes on and on my friends!! Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was and they'll continue singing it for ever more because!! This is the song that never ends!!!!!!......................."Sang Farfello on and on and on.

Schuldrich tuned out the off-key singing Farfello and looked acidly at Crawford, "What were you saying about him coming along?"

Crawford winced as Farfello sang a particualarly high note that he was pretty certain didn't normally exist, "I'm regretting it now............"

"Good."

AT THE FLOWER SHOP..................

"Look it's a rose!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kawaii!!!!!!!!!!! I want it!!!!!!!!!" Cried Farfello.

Nagi looked at him in shock, "Did he just say kawaii, or was that my imagination?"

"He said it." Schuldrich reassured Nagi.

"Unfortunately." Muttered Crawford.

"What are you doing here?" Asked Aya in an icy voice as he drew his katana.

"Yes, do tell Schwartz." Purred Yohji, fingering his wire.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's AYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!" cried out Farfello.

"It's Yohji!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KAWAII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" cried out Farfello.

Schuldrich sighed.

The two members of Weiss stepped back, not certain on how to react to the sight of Farfello calling them cute and actually being happy to see them -- besides for killing reasons.

Farfello lurched forwards, towards Aya and then lurched towards Yohji instead.

"We are going to hug AYA!!!!!!!!"

"NO!!! I want to hug YOHJI!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Aya!"

"Yohji!"

"AAAAYYYAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!"

"YYYOOHHJJIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!"

"Wait a second, we like them both right?"

"Hai."

"So why don't we............."

"I likes!!"

Farfello looked at the now visibly shaken Weiss members and began chanting, "Strip! Strip! Strip! Strip!"

Crawford looked as if he was going to explode with rage at Farfello's antics when a muffled sound brought his attention to Schuldrich and Nagi.

They were laughing like crazy on the floor of the flower shop.

"Schuldrich. Nagi."

They looked up at him and burst into giggles again.

zipzappattererpatpoffzoupzek!! A bright light filled the room.

When it cleared. The REAL Farfello had returned. Bringing his knife to his lips and licking it he attacked Weiss.

. . .

"Were back in our own bodies." Lunari-chan ran out of her room and smack dab into Skylar-chan who had been running to see her.

They looked at each other and screamed, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

For, in the time that they had been in Farfello's body, he had been in their's and had decided that it needed some hurting so it would hurt God.

~owari~

Skylar-chan: .........My body, my poor body..........

Lunari-chan: I think they are neat.

Skylar-chan: You would.