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The first two months flew by in a whirlwind of concerts, interviews, and various TV appearances. I found myself really adjusting to the tour life. I was surprised how well I had come to fit in the group. All the guys had been wonderful, making sure that I had everything I needed. They had truly been great.
Still there was something that was bothering me. Justin. I noticed that everytime I let my guard down he was right there to make me laugh, making private jokes that made us seem more intimate. Sometimes telling me little abstract secrets about himself that drew us closer together.
I also noticed the way my skin tingled at his every touch and how my eyes would travel to his scrumptious lips when he spoke.
In two months he had managed to bridge the gap I had worked so hard to create.
Not that I was attracted to him that way. No, I had Keith. Keith was the one for me. He was sturdy and dependable. We had been together for almost five years.
But still, there was something about Justin, something intriguing. Two million teenyboppers couldn’t be that wrong.
“Come on, Gwen! Join us!” Chris coaxed, beckoning to me as he danced around the room.
“No, you guys look ridiculous!” I replied.
Despite my protests, I allowed him to pull me up from my seat on the couch. He spun me around, and Justin swept through, whisking me away.
“Hey!” Chris protested.
“Sorry man,” Justin called over his shoulder. “I couldn’t resist.”
I tried not to giggle as he led me in an obnoxious tango across the dressing room. When he dipped me low I clung to his large biceps until he had tipped me back upright.
The pressure of his strong hand on my lower back was sending chills tickling up my spine. I knew I had to pull away.
I did so saying airily. “You guys are nuts.”
Justin grasped my hand before I could step out of range and the bubbles in my stomach seemed to be working over time. He spun me around one more time. “You know you love it,” he teased.
“It’s my reason for living,” I returned, rolling my eyes. I de-tangled myself from his arms.
“Hey guys, it’s time to start getting ready,” JC told them, glancing at his watch.
“I’ll take that as my cue,” I said, as I headed toward the door. “Good luck!”
I hurried out of the room, glad to be out of Justin’s over whelming presence. The boy put me on edge when I was around him. I could describe the way he made me feel. All I knew was that I shouldn’t be feeling it.
During the concert I was in my usual place, front and center so that I could take photographs during the concert. Although the show was excellent, I couldn’t help but keep my gaze on the tall blonde heartthrob, usually located on center stage.
We made eye contact and he winked at me as he snaked his torso to the music. The endearment made me blush. That boy had a way of making me feel this way with the simplest gesture.
It wasn’t until that night, lying awake in my bunk that the explanation came to me. I must be missing Keith more than I thought. Justin was just a substitute. Of course, that had to be it.
Deep down I knew that he was more, but that night my excuse was good enough for me.
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