Bahamas, Bahamas, Bahamas mama babies drama! That is all i can say! I really don't know where to start so I will start with Saturday...... Well Friday night turned out to be a beautiful night with many of my friend; however trying to pack at 5 AM after drinking shots all night wasnt the easiet! I slept the whole flight though! Saturday night I met up with 2 of the girls I am staying with... Shanna and Julie. We decided to meet up with some friends of Julies that she had met while out here..... they turned out to be 14 Cubanos from Miami! They were so much fun! We all piled into a mini van and went to the Atlantis to go to the club. Imaging 14 Cubans, me and 2 other white girls piling out of a mini van taxi! It was quite the sight! To say the least we had an excellent time and club hopped til 6AM! They had to catch their ship back to Miami by 7.
Sunday me and the girls relaxed and walked around a little bit... Sunday nights all the locals meet up at the "Fish Fry" It is a strip of restaurants and bars and everyone fills the streets. They have a DJ'd reggae party..... of course we were the only tourists here and also the only white ones at that... granted we stuck out we had a good time! We ended hanging out with a bunch of people including 2 girls named...Reema..... and I don't remember the other one... We all had drinks and listened to the music... we also had a few reggae dance lessons from the locals. We then left with about 4 car loads back to our hotel were we quickly changed and then all went to this club called the Zoo.... the zoo was the perfect name because it was filled with all animals! LOL! About 2 AM the group left to go to a smaller club called the Drop Off where we ended the night with dancing and a few drinks....
Monday one of the local girls picked us up and took us around town, she gave us probably the best tour we could have gotten on the island... we ended up at her house picking and eating fresh tangerines from her trees! She dropped me off to get a few things like postcards and such and plans to meet me back at our hotel for dinner!
To say the least am having an excellent time and enjoying myself before I board the ship tomorrow morning. I cant really fully explain the culture here..... it is pretty different but I can tell you the most beautiful thing is they are so laid back. Last night Stephan told me that time waits for no man and we are going to live it up tonight. They dont seem to care about tomorrow... or anything else but to live for the moment which is something I realized that I no longer do... my mind is always ticking away to whats next? Or what I have to do tomorrow. The beaches are amazing with white sand! Reema said that I am welcome to come back to the island anytime and stay at her house.... nice to know!
I miss you all and will keep you posted! Wish me luck on my first day tomorrow! Kisses!
Lindsey
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CUBA
Cuba
What an amazing country! The night prior to landing, I slept on deck and awoke to old Havana at 5AM where I laid in my sleeping bag and watched the sun rise over the city.
The first day I spent at the University of Havana where I joined other Cuban students at a rally against terrorism. It was very interesting to see the American flag joined by the Cuban flag blowing together in the wind as we listened to the powerful and passionate the youth of Cuba and America joining together as one despite the issues between the governments. I met many local students and my new friends, one named George who is a professor of law at the University who is only 24! It was very strange to see so many young people teaching like this.
After the rally a group of us left to walk the streets with our new friends along the Malecon (coastline) back to the ship which was approximately 4 miles! Later in the evening we all met up at the baseball game where I learned not to eat stadium food. It was a mystery meat that tasted like fried cheese sitting in a bun. YUCK! But I was so hungry I ate it anyways! We enjoyed the rest of our night dancing with our friends.
Saturday we had the privilege to meet with Fidel Castro where I joined the Havana students to listen to their �dear president�s� 4 hour speech about his view on the American country and its gov�t. Whether I was really �privileged� to meet this man or not, I felt it to be an amazing experience and I felt that for those 4 hours I was part of history. Following the speech Fidel threw us a fiesta in our honor with an open bar, live Cuban band and food. I spent the night dancing with locals. One piece of advice�� Cuban Rum is NO JOKE!!!!!!
I learned that the average salary is $12 a month. I looked at how these people live�. In small corridors that appear abandoned from the outside, at the lines of people waiting patiently for their rations of bread. I also saw their clothes were often mismatched and tattered and they often re-wore them day after day. We would go out and they would sit and watch us eating and drinking while they ordered nothing, yet they refused when I offered to pay for them. However, the most amazing thing I saw was despite their situation they still smiled, laughed and opened their doors to me offering anything they had to make me more comfortable. I became aware and felt silly in my clothes as they became so interested in my designer jeans that cost $40 (this was amazing to them). I could not stand walking through the market with them feeling increasingly uncomfortable with each item I bought. I began to feel like the pretty princess with greed that demanded only the best. I was for the first time ashamed of my status because I am a college student and can not afford the lifestyle I feel accustomed to. Yet not once did I feel like they had even the utmost tinge of jealousy of me. All I felt was the eagerness they had to share with me their culture and country and the warmth of new friendships�� and the value of the dollar! Maybe it was me being the jealous one desiring their simplistic lifestyle and being unaware of the world I am used to: Fast cars, greediness, and competition where financial status is a bigger marker of who you are then your personality.
Here Taxi drivers make more money than lawyers and doctors. I asked my friend why study law instead of being a taxi driver? His answer was so simple yet so distant from the American thinking. He said �Because I want to have a respected career. That is more important to me than making more money.�
I write this to you to give us all something to think about so the next time we spend money on silly things you think of my experience. I am not saying that I want to change your way of life but to be grateful of these small things we have. And the next time you are upset because you feel �broke� to remember that you and I will never honestly know what it truly feels like to be broke.
On a brighter note, I freshened up on my Spanish speaking and learned a few Latin dance moves or two� AHEM! HINT! HINT! My squirrel Vice president would be proud and owes me a pat on the back! Also the entire island of Cuba is totally free of ALL American goods. Which is obvious-- but unexplainable. I can not quite explain what it feels like to be surrounded by completely foreign brands! There was all Cuban liquors and cigarettes! AND can you believe there was no McDonalds in site! I believe this may be the last place on earth McDonalds free!
My new roommates are awesome and unique. We have been having a lot of fun together despite the fact that I seem to always be the center of their jokes. After Cuba I am now known as �The Communist�. I am not quite sure why but I enjoy hearing there laughter even if they are laughing at me�.. all in good fun though!
The farther away we get from the Caribbean the rougher the sea gets. I have not gotten sick yet but at times I feel a little dizzy! I wanted to say thank you to all that have replied to my emails and apologize for not being able to reply back individually because it is 50 cents a minute. But your emails are appreciated and make me smile and your supporting words are always welcomed and enjoyed. I arrive in Salvador, Brazil on February 5th. I miss you all! My wall is covered with your pictures and it makes me smile every morning when that is the first thing I see. I am truly blessed and honored to know you all! Adios muchachos!!!!
Lindsey
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CUBA II
blind throughout my journey in Cuba...
It is around midnight; 25 hours since I have left the port of Havana and I lay awake restless as I listen to the waves crashing against the boat. The rocking is intense, yet my mind is elsewhere. I have spent most the day reflecting on my Cuban experience and I have come to the conclusion that I was blind throughout my journey in Cuba. Looking back I am noticing things that my instinct picked up on, but I had not paid attention to at the time. Something felt off so to say. I only spent 3 short days in Havana and was not able to have enough time to pin point where the feelings were coming from but I know something was not right. I might as well not have gone to Cuba because I never saw the place. What I mean by this is that everything I saw, did and heard was a set up. Nothing happened by coincidence. The people I met and was surrounded by, I believe, were hand selected by the government to be my �guide� in Cuba.
Everything was controlled, including me. When my new friends showed me around town and refused to eat with me, even on my account, was not because they were not hungry but because they were not allowed to. At the baseball game the police told our Cuban friends that they could not sit with us apparently because that area was �reserved�. So we moved with them to the �Cuban� side. The speech Fidel gave was four hours long yet he said nothing. He basically �impressed� us with his intelligence but carefully maneuvered his way around anything involving his own people or country.
The party he threw afterwards was such a front. If you looked closely military was everywhere�. Plain clothed but watching with open eyes and ears. When the banquet of food was offered the Cuban people pushed their way to the tables and devoured the food filling bags with the chicken and fish. I ate nothing because I could not even get close to the tables. At the time I found it rude but now I am grateful that my serving was saved for others, now knowing that some have not tasted chicken in over a year.
I have no doubt that the streets were wiped clean before our arrival and it was known what the Cubans were supposed to say and how they were to act for our stay. I used an internet caf� so that I could send out a mass email to all of you to tell of my Cuban experience and in order to log in I had to use my passport number as identification. This is used to keep the Cuban people from Internet access. When I began to describe the country with details of what I had seeing my computer suddenly changed into a different web page denying me of any more usage and all that I had wrote was lost. Looking back I now know the caf� was government ran�. I truly believe my email was being monitored. They did not want me to send back the information that I was writing. There were so many more incidents I cannot begin to try and uncover this of Cuba know nothing outside of their country. They are not allowed to see the news or �surf� the Internet. They do not even know who Saddam Hussein is or what goes on elsewhere besides what Castro tells them. On September 11th, Castro was aired on TV and told the people of Cuba that there were horrible occurrences in America that Bush was responsible for, and he said, �see how Bush treats his people and what he does to them?�
Many of the local residents that opened their arms to the group of Americans that I came with were later arrested for having contact with us. I only hope my new friends were not troubled. I have a very eerie feeling of the whole situation and wish I would have been more aware of these tell-tale signs and
that I would have paid more attention to who was watching me. The reason I was so safe in Cuba was because every person knew how severe the punishment would be for anything imposed on a visiting American.
I am very upset that I did not truly experience Cuba and perhaps knowing what I do now, I will someday return one step ahead of the act that has been �prearranged� for me. My new friends from Havana told us that maybe to us we had a few days hanging out with them, but to them it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and we would never be forgotten. I know now what he meant by that. They got to go places they had never been able to go before whether because they simply could not afford it or because places are restricted to Cubans unless accompanied by tourists. They were able to have a good time with us without us pressing on their view of politics and having to fake that sugar coating front for us that they are so well trained to do. We were able to forget all barriers between us and they were able to, for 2 nights, go out and have a good time. Something we do every weekend and something they do maybe only once in a lifetime.
P.S. I can see lights of the nearby island�. I am passing through the Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico! It is beautiful by night!
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SHIP LIFE
...I hope this eases your ability to express the universal language�
The ability to let it shine with ease�The ability to smile.corruption.
The people
February 14, 2003
I hope you are all as eager to hear my tales of Brazil as I am eager to tell them but tonight my mind wanders on to other thoughts. People are an amazing creature and it never fails to amaze me how we react and cope with different situations. Some go through the transitions of life smoother than others�.
While others transitions are as rough as the seas I sail across every night. I have been dumped onto a ship filled with new faces and new minds, some brighter and more full of color than others. What is it about a person that stimulates you? How is it that you come together with those that surround your days and manage to cross paths with others only once? I have become so close with some of my fellow shipmates and have yet to speak one word to others. It is amazing how we adjust as strange people and manage to come together on this voyage of a lifetime.
After my experience in Brazil, I have become intrigued with Capoeira�. A martial art technique mixed with the beat of African drums. There are several varieties of the art. Angolan Capoeira is used to celebrate and worship the gods of the Candomble religion. The art was brought over from Africa and practiced by the slaves until it was suppressed and outlawed in the 1800�s�. Capoeira resurfaced in the 1970�s with the help of a man named Manoel dos Reis Machado, known to his students as Mestre Bimba. In addition to becoming accepted as a social activity, a challenging game, and a national sport, Capoeira also developed as a means of self-development and an expression of freedom for anyone dealing with his or her own self and social constraints, especially for those who struggle to survive in the present economic situation of Brazil.
With this is mind I began to wonder what is our �Capoeira�? How do we deal with our current situations in America? Or our situations as young adults or middle aged adults for that matter? How do we deal with being a part of the human race, so different and so far apart� different colors, different religions, languages, cultures�? Etc� yet we still all breathe the same breaths and our hearts still beat to the same rhythm. I am not yet to the other side of this world� yet I have found one thing that follows with me throughout this journey and that is my ability to smile. It is understood where my language and culture is not. I feel as though no matter how far I get away from home, no matter how strange the lands become, this will never change. The smile is the universal language.
Being that today is Valentine�s Day I wonder what is love? We often think of it as a noun but it is neither a person, place or thing but a verb... an action word. Dr. Martin Luther King said "Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.� How do I express this action where my tongue is not understood or heard? I have realized that there is a great difference between traveling to see countries and traveling to see people. If only half the world does not know how the other half lives is it my duty to help others understand �my people�? How am I supposed to be this strong and assertive when I do not even know myself? The idea of I is complex in itself�.. I myself am made of many selves, not the person I once was, but also the persons I have tried to be, persons I have avoided being, and the persons I fear I might
be.
I find myself having to deal with a feeling that is either startlingly new or else obsessively old. I feel incapable of dealing with it. Granted I am only part way through this voyage, I have been in 4 countries including home in the past month and I notice a striking similarity in these events, people, and places that are fundamentally unalike. The more I explore the similarity the more striking it becomes. Certain people, places, and events stand out in my memory with intensity beyond logic. I flush with shame as I find myself realizing an injustice has been done, and I am powerless to do anything about it�. Or am I?
I am realizing inspiration is a real thing, a gift from the subconscious to the conscious mind. When I sit down to write to you all about my experiences I am paralyzed at the sight of a blank sheet of paper. As I write I question how this dialogue reveals what I care about? What connections do I see between one image and another? How can I strengthen those connections? Am I saying what I really mean, telling my truth about it? How do I explain each day while at port in these 3rd world countries� the cycle of guilt, avoidance, and pressure I endure? I am working on having the mastery to take my experience, whether it is visual or mental, and make meaningful shapes that convey a reality to others. But throughout all this like any good understanding of a story, fictious or true- is a deeper pattern of change, a pattern of connection and disconnection. The conflict of the surface events are like waves, but underneath is an emotional tide, the ebb and flow of human connection. Humans will clash. But human belonging is necessary and the need for community, the need to win out over others and the need to belong to others.
Oliver Wendall Holmes once said that �we must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it, but we must not drift or lie at anchor.� This is exactly why I am here. This is how I am stimulated like a drug. The farther I dig into the unknown the more my adrenaline pumps, the more excited I get, the more my fears that hover inside me are exposed. I have found my �Capoeira�. For if you consider the existence of an individual as a larger or smaller room, it appears evident that most people learn to know only a corner of their room, a place by the window, a strip of floor on which they walk up and down. Thus they have a certain security. But because of this the mountains that used to imprison me have become my chosen stalking ground. I am on the verge of a great change, yet I lack the maturity or courage to take that difficult leap to recognition. But this is only my epiphany� an epiphany is a crisis or action in the mind, a moment when a person, an event, or a thing is seen in a light so new that it is as if it has never been seen before. At this recognition, the mental landscape of the viewer is permanently changed. Change for me at this point is inevitable.
So as you follow my emails and my thoughts and feelings, say what you will about them�. but take it as a story. I have realized that no story is interesting without hardship. As Charles Baxter says, �Hell is story friendly. If you want a compelling story, put your protagonist among the damned. The mechanisms of hell are nicely attuned to the mechanisms of narrative. Not so the pleasures of Paradise. Paradise is not a story.� Paradise is where I will arrive when the stories are over. My stories will tell of human struggle, characters confronting their hardships and uncertainties. Hopefully it will make you feel better about your own conflicts and confusions and fears. We have a sense of community together now, of sympathy, a cleansing sympathy. As Aristotle said, "and relief that we are safe in our room only reading the story.� A story of sadness, even tragedy, makes us feel, paradoxically, better as though we are confronting our own conflicts and fears, and have endured.
I do not expect you to understand my thoughts or feelings or to agree with me at times or even yet to be able to follow my rambling ideas, but I do hope if only one sentence in this entire letter, that something I have said brings your inspiration into your consciousness and can somehow make your days better and help you appreciate the green grass we live on as free people. And most importantly I hope this eases your ability to express the universal language�.. The ability to let it shine with ease�. The ability to smile.
Lots of love,
Lindsey
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BRAZIL
Sent~February 25th
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EVERYONE- I have been in bed for the last 48 hours unable to move or eat. I finally got up this evening to join my friends for dinner� my first meal in 2 days. I laid in bed with a thrown out back, a broken toe, a sore wrist, and depressed and lost in my own thoughts. Sounds great right? Well actually it was� in the last 24 hours I have started the revolution inside my self and experienced my first civil war of thoughts. I did not want to eat or do anything because my body, mind and soul were exhausted after all I have seen in the last month. I cried myself to sleep the other night after leaving S. Africa and just stayed in that position for 2 days�.. so I suppose I should start my story now and at least explain what�s going on�
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Salvador, Brazil
The Vacation Away From the Vacation!
We arrived early in the morning and watched the sun rise over the city. Around 9 AM we were cleared by customs and stepped foot on to the pier. I spent the day going up the �elevator� into the upper part of the city to do some shopping with my roommates Kristen and Amy and also my friend Julie who is a student at the U of M! I was very disappointed at the site of cheap tourist trinkets and pressuring venders. I was beginning to really miss Cuba even more. We had a WONFERFUL lunch in an outdoor caf� where I enjoyed Filet Minong for about $4.00!
We then split up with Julie and went back to the ship to freshen up for our welcome reception to Salvador. When we got to the reception we were greeted with drums and locals doing Cachoeira (a martial arts form that I discussed in my last email). We spent the night eating the local dishes buffet style and an open bar with a live band. I met several other Americans and some Brazilians and we took off together, all 8 of us, piled into a small car to a local club called the Rockin' Rio. We had a blast! I used a few of my salsa moves that I had learned in Cuba and really had a good time!
I was split up from the group and later found out that they left me, 20 miles from the ship and with no money! Luckily I spotted a guy from Rutgers University from my ship and we left together. We could not remember the name of our pier nor could we communicate to the taxi driver what we were trying to say! We drove all over the city and Ko (Rutgers) reached into his pocket and realized he had lost all his money�. So now we are lost in the city in a cab with no money! Finally I was able to communicate to the taxi driver that we were by the elevator in broken Portuguese and we made it back to the ship where we were able to pay him what we owed! Whew! Needless to say I learned my lesson to make sure and be aware of the name of the port that we dock on in each country!
The next day I wandered the city a little on my own and with Kristen. One thing that I really noticed was that the most dangerous citizens were the children themselves. Brazil has a high amount of abandoned kids that form gangs and rely on each other to survive through robbing people and such. Families cannot afford their children so they leave them to fend for themselves at a very young age. I encountered many that had beat themselves up just to make themselves better beggars�. a way to look more pathetic to tourists. There is also a sever issue of the police killing the street children. They drive around at night and shoot these young kids in effort to �clean up their streets�. It was very hard to deal with seeing these young kids who have to be such little terrorists to survive. Also the AIDs population is out of control in Brazil. Beggars will approach you, cut themselves with a razor and tell you they have AIDs and you better give them money. Needless to say I hated being in this city. I wanted to get out.
That night I attended a Capoeira performance that was AMAZING! This form of discipline is unexplainable. The people were so athletic and beautiful. The men�� I can�t explain! LOL! AMAZING! One of the guys kept pursuing me through the whole show which made me very nervous. I have never blushed that hard! LOL! He waited for me outside the building and tried to kiss me�. I ran away from him like a little schoolgirl! LOL! Besides all that the show was very interesting and really told of the African Brazilian struggle through slavery. I met 2 other girls there and ended up going into the city with them that night. They really weren�t my style but I was glad to not be alone� we ran into another group of people who I ended up tagging along with instead. Later we were at a restaurant/bar and I ran into some girls from the ship in the bathroom. We recognized each other and immediately clicked! Melanie was a 6 foot tall Mongolian girl from Pitt. She turned out to be my twin personality wise�. Khiran is Indian from D.C. She is originally from Vancouver and an exact replica of how my old best friend Lisa Lopez was before when we were inseparable. Ellen is 5� 10� and very Euro looking. She is from Montana and the calmer, sophisticated one of the group. We had a blast together that night!
We ended up jumping from place to place and meeting all sorts of locals! This guy spoke Spanish so we were communicating a little bit but he really was bothering me. His body language made it appear that we were a couple and I hated it and continued to ignore him and give him the cold shoulder but everywhere I went he followed. In a last attempt to politely make him go away I started talking to a guy that was a resident of Salvador� he was very interesting to talk to and also performed Capoeira. The Spanish speaking guy got so pissed he called over a police officer and tried to get the local Salvadorian that I was conversating with arrested! By this time my Portuguese was improving and I told the guy to shut up and explained to the police officer that there was no problem and I was fine in Portuguese. Needless to say this got rid of the bothersome guy and the rest of the night was spent in peace with my new girlfriends!
The next day me and my new friends, Ellen, Melanie, and Khiran woke up early and decided that we wanted to get out of Salvador. We went to the station and bought a ticket to Sao Paulo. We packed city clothes thinking we were going to another big city! Little did we know we were in for a big surprise! At the station we met a couple from Canada that was here working in Sal. for the last year and a guy from Israel. We spent the next hour getting to know these very interesting people. When our tickets were called we went to board and to our surprise we were loaded into a small boat! We started the 2 � hour boat ride
through the rockiest waves I have yet experienced! It took all my energy not to get sick! When we docked I got out to see the most beautiful island I have ever seen lay before me! It was amazing and there was not a tourist in site! The
streets were made of sand and there was not a car on the entire island! It was amazing! Granted we definitely did not pack right for this excursion thinking we were going to an island, but this would have to do!
The Canadians showed us to a good hotel to stay at which was very small accommodations, bunk bed style with no sheets or amenities! There was a hammock swinging outside our door and the ocean out front and that was all we needed! All I had packed was high heeled shoes and dressy clothing so we spent the next 3 days shoeless and in swimsuits... the less the better on this island! What a treat! It was a vacation away from a vacation! I can not explain to you the level of peace I reached in Sao Paulo de Morro! If you can imagine a small island with the softest sand filling the streets, no tacky vendors, delicious food, Bob Marley�s music everywhere, men in tiny underwear and girls in their thong bikinis and the aroma of marijuana everywhere. It was mad CHILL! I spent these three days lounging around, never rushing. It was the best. At night people set up stands with fresh fruit and blenders to mix up the tastiest drinks. Bottles of liquor were all a dollar and we spent the evenings sipping cold drinks, hanging with the locals, learning Portuguese and dancing to reggae on the ocean! I met a young girl that was about 8 yrs old who followed me around the island wanting to play patty cake games with me all night! She was so cute! Also I had a personal bartender named Govani that made me the best drinks and even watched my belongings� I gave him a pair of my flip flops to watch and when I returned to get them he was gone! Oh well! I figured I did not need them here anyways. I did not have a care in the world. Granted I did not get to do any charity work in Brazil, I spent the time learning how to relax, how to breath and how to properly chew your food to full enjoyment.
The second night we met 5 Italian/ Israeli guys� some from Italy some from Israel and some from NYC� they were a lot of fun! I really got to know my new girlfriends well and we realized that this group was a group of women that are going to be friends for a lifetime! I saw Govani�s friend and asked him in Portuguese where Govani was? He pointed him out and I came running towards him yelling in Portuguese, �Govani! Where are my shoes!?!?!??!� It was quite the site! He quickly pulled them out from underneath his stand! He had brought them back for me! I could not believe the honesty here�. Even when I bought drinks from him, sometimes he would not have change so we would just keep track of what I owed or he owed me and kept it up throughout the weekend. We danced in the rain and jumped in the ocean at 4 AM to take a dip! It was the best�. Until we got out of the water! LOL! My friend�s clothes were gone and so was my wallet! I knew I deserved that one! Ha ha ha! The thoughtful thief did leave his dirty work shirt in place of my friend�s clothes so I kept it as a souvenir. I just had to laugh at that one. Our friend did not find it funny since he was stuck wearing his underwear through the town! We all watched the sun rise over the ocean. Me, Melanie and Khiran went for another dip at 6 am and noticed that there was a group of German guys on the beach taking our pictures... they yelled to us and mistook us for models so we played along! LOL! We ran along the beach posing and laughing as me and Melanie went to pose and the waves pushed us head first on top of each other in the water! Then Melanie went to run down the beach and tell our other friend the story... she was running and yelling �They think we are models!!!!!� As she tripped over a boats rope and dove head first into the water again cutting up her whole front side!
The following day we came upon a �farm� that had horses and paid the guy to let us ride them down the beach�� little did we know the whole camp was flea infested including the horses! But we rode anyways all up and down the island watching the sun set over the ocean�. I had a big white horse named Crystal in Portuguese. He decided to start running and I thought I was going to die but I made it back safe! And I had a blast! The next day we awoke to find out the Canadians had paid for our hotel for the three days! We took the ferry back to Salvador and did some last few minute errands. We ended the night with a beer and a bite to eat before we loaded back onto the ship for another long stretch of days at sea before Cape Town South Africa! What a wonderful self experience I had! We really learned a lot of Portuguese and a lot about the Brazilian culture. I would love to come back sometime to this hidden paradise unknown to other tourists! I think fate is a strange thing sometimes�.. my new travel partners are amazing and it is funny to think how I ever stumbled upon such great new friends!
I miss you all and hope all is well! I will write about S Africa another time and shipboard life another time! Hopefully I will find a caf� in Tanzania so I can properly respond to you guys! But for now abrogado! Chow!
Lindsey
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SOUTH AFRICA
Cape Town, South Africa
I arrived in Cape Town on February 19th at 5 AM. I watched the sunrise over Table Mountain and the beautiful city. The first day I went to Robben Island which is where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned. It is a combination of a prison and a concentration camp. Our guide had been a prisoner there for many years� most of his life. It was very interesting. On the 30 minute boat ride back to the city the entire fleet got sick! Everyone but Joe, Amy and I was throwing up everywhere because of the motion of the ocean! I felt like a true sea chick. I was completely fine the whole boat ride! When we came back I took off on my own to grab a sandwich at a caf� on my own and enjoy the sound and people of the new place. I then returned to the ship to meet up with the crew for our departure to the Stellenbosch wine lands. Melanie had gotten a number from a taxi driver so we called him up to drive us 9 girls to the wine lands. He pulled up in a mini van with 2 other men! We did not know what to do. He offered us a very cheap fair so we decided just to go for it! I thought for sure they were going to kill us! LOL! We even wrote down there license plate number on all our hands just in case anything happened. But they did take us to the right spot! Granted they pinched me and Melanie�s butts when we got out, but we were alive!
We arrived at our destination a hostile called Stumble Inn. It was a decent hostile, dorm style and co-ed. The man running it was a young guy named John. He and the whole place was very hippy style. He agreed to take us out on a pub crawl for the night. We jumped from bar to bar in this all white town and definitely experienced some serious racial tension because of our multi cultural group. We had a good time but went home a little disappointed and offended by some occurrences.
The next morning we spent several hours trying to find transportation to the wine lands. John finally agreed to bring us. He brought us in a 1970 Land Rover that was ghettofied! LOL! The entire roof was missing and the truck was rusty and gutted out. The back had 2 steel planks for sitting on. We all climbed in and headed up the beautiful drive to the wine lands that John�s parents owned. We first had wine testing... over 10 kinds along with aged cheese as he taught us the proper way to drink and appreciate wine. Then he gave us a wonderful tour of the factory. He packed us all picnic baskets and we headed up to the peak of the land to have a picnic lunch while overlooking the grape filled valleys and mountain peaks off in the distance. It was amazing. I can not describe the scene! The lunch was fabulous too!
John said he would also bring us back, the 45 minute drive, to Cape Town. We got to ride in our Land Rover which we entitled the �holler mobile�! The whole way we blew kisses at all the passing workers leaving the fields for the day. It was quite the site! When we returned to the city, John said he would bring us to the top of Table Mountain for a farewell drink. Half the way up his truck, our �holler mobile�, broke down! We had to all get out and push! LOL! We found bricks and parked it there! John had his brother come and get him and I and the girls went for dinner. That night I, Melanie, Khiran, Lyn and Chrissina headed out for a night of dancing. Our taxi driver took us way out in the cut to a club. Then I, Chrissina and Lyn were the ONLY white people to be seen! It was a very fun place though despite the harassment the Lyn received for being blonde and a few other situations! We met 2 models that worked in Cape Town and Europe. One named Marvin was IDENTICAL to Lenny Kravitz! We spent most the night dancing with them until they left. They said there goodbyes and me and the girls continued to dance when I felt a tug at my purse. I grabbed it and realized a few items were missing. I turned around and noticed one of my items sticking out from a guy�s pocket. I went up to him and confronted him. We argued for a while and I gave up because what he had taken really had no value. We continued dancing and after a while I forgot all about him. A little later he came up to me and said �Do you want your stuff back?� I said, �Yes�. I will not type exactly what he said back but he basically said �If you want your stuff back you have to give me something� This something was a rude and derogatory remark towards a woman�s body part. So I gave him exactly what he asked for�. I punched him straight in his jaw and knocked him out against the stage. I snapped. He got up and I charged at him full force. Melanie jumped on my back, Khiran pushed me back from the front and Lynn tried to grab my hands to contain me as I lost it on the man. His friends grabbed him by his clothing and drug him by his shirt out from underneath me across the dance floor. The bouncers kicked him out. I received an applause from the club as everyone was watching the show. Granted I may not have made the right decision but I doubt that man will ever rob or disrespect an American woman again.
The next day I spent wandering the city on my own and doing some shopping. I
was leaving the mall when I saw a little boy dressed in dirty torn clothes digging through the garbage. He appeared to be looking for food. I asked him what his name was and introduced myself. He looked at me with a confused look. I asked him if he would like to grab a bite to eat with me. His entire face lit up for just a second and he shook his head yes. I asked him where he wanted to eat and he pulled me towards a Steers which is equivalent to Burger King. I asked him what he wanted as he stared silently at the menu for a while. He did not respond so I asked him if he wanted a burger. He nodded yes. I asked which one and he pointed to a picture. Then I asked if he wanted fries and again he nodded yes. I then asked if he wanted a coke and he nodded. I placed the order as the entire �colored� crew just stared at me with confusion. Keep in mind the racial issue of S. Africa. They could not believe that I was not only interacting with someone of color but also helping him. It was a very strange feeling for me, but I was doing what anyone would or should do. We got his food and I asked if I could sit with him so we sat outside at a picnic table. I started asking him questions about where he lived and about his family. His name was Mantinah and he is 12 years old and homeless living in the streets of Cape Town. He is not sure where his mother or father live but he has to live on his own because his parents could not afford to feed him anymore. He tried to be so polite with his food. He even ate his fries with a fork. We ended up having a very nice conversation. The time neared when I had to leave and meet my friends. I explained to him that I had to go and I said �Goodbye Mantinah, it was very nice to meet you.� And he looked at me and said �Nice to meet you to Lindsey.� I could not believe that he remembered my name. I had only told him once and that was when I approached him by the garbage before I even offered a meal. I tried to fight the tears as I headed back towards the ship. I had become so numb to beggars and here was this young boy not asking anyone for anything but digging in garbage for his own survival. I could not help but wander what has this world come to. And not only that but what have I come to� I have only spent 2 months improverished countries and I am already numb.
That night me, Melanie, Khiran and Chrissina went to a club called 169 to meet up with Marvin (Lenny Kravitz). The place was very nice. Somewhat a lounge but also a decent sized dance floor and some fat beats. The next day I did some more shopping at the markets and looking for Mantenah. I wanted to say goodbye and buy him some clothing or maybe dinner again. I took in my last few breathes of Cape Town. As the sun set, I sat looking out to the ocean. I boarded the S.S. Universe and watched as we drifted back out to the dark ocean and Cape Town faded away. Even though Cape Town was very Europeanized; S. Africa still taught me a valuable lesson. It showed me the great racial segregation that still exists and the century old struggle that the people have dealt with. I have seen the broken down rubbish that the �coloreds� call home that looks more like an old shack out back than a living space. I have seen the British with their fancy cars and nice homes overlooking the ocean at the base of Table Mountain. I have experienced what it feels like to be looked at with disgust because I am not with �white people� and interacting with the �lower class�. I have felt what it feels like to go into a place of entertainment for the repressed �colored� people of Cape Town and to be accepted yet not fully trusted.
I did not understand why all places that I have gone to the people, for the majority of the time, left me alone and were willing to interact with me whereas others like Lyn where pulled at and messed with. Ryan, my friend from the boat said he feels that it is my ora, that I have a relaxed vibe and people can see that I am comfortable among people that are different than me. He said most people are uncomfortable when around a completely different culture and environment then their own. Maybe he is right maybe not, but no matter how culturally aware and open I am, I definitely felt the tension and definitely was aware of my skin color in the segregated country of S Africa�
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TANZANIA
Dar Es Salaam/ Arusha, Tanzania
I arrived in the city of Dar Es Salaam around 8 in the morning. It was a similar scene to every other port. The usual fishing boats filled with men out to catch their way of living and such, but this time something felt different. People lined the docks and streets near the port staring at us with curiosity. This was the first time in 20 years that the S.S. Universe Explorer has landed in Dar Es Salaam.
Our port was not the usual cruise entry but a side of a wall behind a junk yard. In order to get anywhere we had to walk through several abandoned buildings and train cabs to get to a gate ran by one security officer holding an extremely big machine gun. Our arrival was unannounced to the citizens so people were shocked to see so many white faces filling their town. I even had my picture taken several times as people stared at me like I was an alien.
It was HOT! The girls and I took a bus into the city in search of a money exchange. We had a lot of trouble finding a place open for it was Sunday. We eventually ended up in a very ghetto area where we definitely were the main attraction. After the exchange we got back into a taxi and headed for a history museum. Outside the museum was a group of teenage boys that were standing staring at us. My friend Melanie and Khiran told me that they liked their picture to be taken but I should ask them first in Kiswahili (the language). Of course I did not know how to say it so Khiran pulled out her guide sheet and told me to say �Mpensi nina kupenda�. So I ran off in my sun dress yelling �Mpensi nina kupenda! Mpensi nina kupenda!� Over and over as the boys just stood there staring and looking back and forth at each other. Then they turned to me and smiled so I took that as a yes and eagerly snapped a picture. Then they started following me as I returned to Khiran and Melanie who were standing there laughing hilariously. I was confused so I asked Khiran, �What did you have me say to them?!?!? Why are they following me? What does Mpensi nina kupenda mean??!?!� Apparently Mpensi nina kupenda means �lover, I love you!� So here I was in my sun dress running after these teenage boys yelling �Lover! I love you!� over and over as I was snapping their pictures! HAHAHA! No wonder they followed me!
We all headed to an internet caf� where Melanie and I got into a confrontation� I think we were both just hot and crabby. I told her to leave me there because I did not want to deal with the BS. So she did! I soon ran into Julie. We ended up walking around and talking with some of the locals trying out our Kiswahili. We ate a very nice dinner at the New Africa hotel and headed back for the ship. I still wanted to hang out but I did not have anyone to go out with me. I ran into Ryan (the Pitt football player) and dragged him out! We headed for a place called the Q Bar. When we arrived, we realized the place was filled with tourists, prostitutes and a pimp! YUCK! We grabbed a beer anyways when I heard my name being yelled out. It was Melanie and Khiran and some others from the group! They ran up and grabbed me and hugged me. They apologized and said that they had been talking about how much they missed me all night and they were so glad I was there! I apologized to and we all joined in for a drink. We left �prostitute play land� and headed for a night club. It was the best! It was all locals and they played a mix of African music and American. We got our groove on until we sweat and left around 3:30 AM. Once back at the ship we stayed up telling stories about our lives until 5 when breakfast was served. I took a quick shower and grabbed my bag and was on my safari bus by 6:30 AM for the 11 hour drive to Arusha!
Granted it was a LONG drive, the scenery was amazing! I saw the best of Africa from the bustling city to the countryside to the small villages! Some land was lush green while other was dry and open plains! 8 hours into the trip we made a stop and split up into smaller groups. Myself, Erica (Mexican-American from LA), Ian (African American from Maryland), Noah (Caucasian from???), Whitney (Caucasian) Scott (Caucasian from LA), Fernando (Peruvian and Columbian from Colorado) and Rogato (local Tanzanian� he was our safari guide!) climbed into truck number 1. A large green Land Rover with a removable roof! We had a great group that was both diverse and personable. Rogato was amazing and loved
playing my rap and Sade tapes!
We drove a few more hours until we arrived at our home for the next 4 days. It was a small campsite surrounded by Masai villages and overlooked a stream and mountains. You could even see Mt. Kilimanjaro in the early dawn. We dropped off our bags and joined the crew for an authentic African meal. We ate dinner as we saw the sun set over the mountains. Then we build a fire and lit the lanterns. The sky soon came to life with the most amazing star show I had ever seen. There were shooting stars everywhere and I could even see stars straight ahead of me where the horizon meets the earth! It was incredible� so amazing that I refused to sleep in my tent and pulled my sleeping bag out and spread it close to the fire. Earlier I had gone to the edge of the campsite to get away from all the others and take a moment to take it all in. I realized that I had left my flashlight down there. I started crawling through the thick brush when I heard a rustle close by. I jumped nervously when out came a Masai holding a spear. I said Jambo to him (Kiswahili for hello) because I did not know what else to do. He just stood there and followed me as I headed back to my sleeping bag. I did not know what to do! I have been studying the Masai people, but here he was, out of nowhere, holding a spear and following me! So I decided to get into my sleeping bag. This Masai warrior stood by me all night protecting me with his spear as he kept my fire going. It was the best! I felt so safe. These people are incredible! Talk about experiencing Africa. Here I was under the stars in my bag under the protection of a Masai warrior and his spear! WOW!
The next day I woke just as the sun was peaking out and the Masai was throwing another log on my fire. I watched the sun rise and thy sky fill with a million colors as I saw a small herd of Zebras walking across the plain! Breakfast was served and I was in Rogato�s safari truck by 6:30. As we started our safari, I tried to think of words to describe Africa� all I could think about was soil, sweat and struggle. The people here are amazing. It was really indescribable. The morning was slow as far as sighting animals but the group was so happy to be experiencing the true Africa; the trees, random birds, herds of Impalas, a few zebras and giraffes as well. We took off in search of an elephant. It was not long until we got what we asked for. Shortly before lunch animals came out of everywhere! I remember one point when I was watching a family of elephants eating and two giraffes not to far away along with zebras and Impalas all together! It looked like the images from my children�s bible when Noah gathered the animals for the ark. It was incredible! We also saw two lionesses!
Around 1:00 we stopped at an open area to eat our lunches. We were surrounded by baboons! They were everywhere! I was sitting on the ground nibbling my sandwich when a huge baboon came running toward me! I grabbed my lunch and ran while he snatched my sunscreen. He dropped it a few yards away with 4 huge teeth puncture marks in it! I love monkeys but I was a little nervous of these intelligent animals but it did add for a little excitement! The rest of the evening was the same. We definitely saw our fair share of Impalas, Zebras, Giraffes, birds, and animals.
That night we gathered around the fire to enjoy another African meal. I ended up having a few drinks with some other students, John and Erica. We played some music and got to know the locals that were hired to run our campsite. I had a very good talk with the owner of the operation, Muhktar, about the Masai tribe. I told him I hoped to have more interaction with them because their culture amazed me. He said he was going to try and arrange something for me. The rest of the night we spent dancing to Eminem and other American CD�s with the locals. I told them of my amazing experience sleeping outside the previous night so they decided to join me! Erika, John and I laid by the fire pointing out the constellations as we watched for shooting stars. It was strange not to be able to see the big and little dipper. That was when it really hit me that I was on the other side of the world!
The next day was the same. We watched the sunrise, freshened up, ate breakfast and headed out on our safari. We saw many of the same animals including ostriches, water buffalos, gazelles and a lioness! There was a leopard sighting but we could not find him. We watched the lioness hunt a group of Impalas! It was amazing! I was 5 feet from the lion, hanging out of the jeep taking pictures as it studied her prey. She slowly crept out of the bushes and crawled along for about � hour before making her attack. The Impalas were to fast and were already nervous with us around so the lioness was unsuccessful but it was still amazing! We spent the rest of the evening on the search for either a cheetah or a leopard� both animals that were rarely sighted. Despite we had no success; we still had an amazing time enjoying the scenery, the animals and the sounds of the African wildlife. We enjoyed a break parked under the shade of a sausage tree surrounded by a large group of baboons eating. It was fun to see them interact both fighting and playing. On the drive back to the campsite we were stopped by a group of about 20 young Masai men that were dressed in all black with white face paint (this is the traditional dress for young men that are celebrating their recent circumcision). Some even had black ostrich feathers in their hair and they all carried their spears. We offered them gifts, like pens and other random items that they do not have. I had one that found me interesting. Ha ha ha! I could not communicate with him very well but we got our names across and he understood hello. I think he liked me because he followed me around saying hi in English and then he would just stare at me with a blank but stern face! Ha ha ha! That night we again watched the sun set over the mountains and enjoyed another amazing dinner.
Muhktar kept his promise! His surprise was a Masai tribal dance! It was amazing! Because I had been studying these people I found the spiritual and sexual dance especially interesting. I knew what the different moves meant etc. I LOVED it! It could not have been a better ending to a wonderful experience! I would love to be able to get to know these people and there culture better some day. AMAZING.
Once again I slept under the stars and had breakfast and got into Rogato�s truck. We started for our drive back to Dar Es Salaam. Just outside the campsite Rogato slammed on his breaks and swerved to the side of the road. What do you know! A Cheetah! Crossing the dang road right by our campsite! That was it! The safari could not have been anymore complete! It was hard to say goodbye to our new friend Rogato but we exchanged email addresses and I told him that I would love to come back!
I do not know what to say about Africa. It was an amazing experience that I can not explain. It is so preserved and untouched. Even that stars have remained how you would picture them thousands of years ago. This is definitely a place that I recommend people see at least once in their lives!
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Chennai, India
�Madam! Madam! Please Madam!... Madam! Madam! Please, PLEASE Madam!�
�Please what?� I wanted to ask. �Please give you money, or please give you food? Please take you away from this place filled with pollution and exhaust that your tiny pink lungs inhale everyday? Please take you away from the horrid smell of filth, sewage and other human feces? Please give you shoes for your tiny, dirty, calloused feet? Or please explain to your mother that you should be playing and being a child like other kids as she pushes you from her familiar side into the crowd of foreigners so that you can beg while they look at you with disgust and shove you aside as they pass by with their shopping bags? Or is it that you want to know and understand why these foreigners immediately reach for their hand sanitizer cream after you touch their hands to tell them your name and ask for some help? Please Madam what?�
If you want me to look into your face, I can not. I can not gaze into your eyes for I fear that they will haunt me forever. I can not give you any money or anything at that because I know that if I do I will be engulfed by the swarming crowd of beggars. I shut my eyes as I pass the mass of starving children and pretend that I am somewhere else until I am able to pass the security gate back on to my ship� but no matter how hard I try your sweet, innocent little voice pleading for my help will not fade away�
�Please Madam please! Please Madam! Madam!�
I sit here and fell paralyzed by the blank screen not knowing what to write or where to begin. After India I will never be the same. For the first time it is all coming together and really hitting hard. I do not know what to make of this place. At times I shared some of the most beautiful and full smiles with these people and at other times I fought back some of the biggest and full drops of tears from rolling down my face.
We arrived in Chennai on Saturday and after clearing customs we stepped out into the heat. It started immediately... through the security gate I was bombarded with begging children and adults and grabbed at by rickshaw drivers (form of taxi) trying to take me anywhere but where I wanted to go� I was with Khiran and we decided to head to Spencer�s Plaza to do some shopping. We climbed into the back of a rickshaw and pulled out into the most chaotic insane driving I have ever experienced. Cars, trucks, motor bikes and rickshaws whizzed and buzzed all around in what seemed to be all different directions. Horns blared non stop from everywhere as the worst smell of sewage filled my nostrils. I could almost feel the exhaust and pollution coat my face one layer at a time. People were everywhere.
Khiran and I spent the day shopping and headed back to the ship to meet up with the others. That night Melanie, Erika, Ryan, Khiran and I spent and hour arguing with the rickshaw drivers who were quadrupling, if not more, the price for a ride to a nearby night club. We finally managed to work out a price and off we went. We arrived at The Flame, an upper scale bar and disco connected to a five star hotel. At the door we met 4 guys that are pilots for Kuwait Air. They had connection at the club so we got in free and enjoyed drinks on them. Later in the night me and Erika went to dance with a few of them. It may have been the most hilarious experience I have ever had! Talk about not knowing how to dance! It was TERRIBLE! LOL! The guy dancing with Erika was ballroom dancing and throwing her around like a rag doll! I was dying laughing! Meanwhile my guy was doing what I would call the boogie woogie and occasionally his 5� 6� self would decide to throw me back and dip me! Man! Other guys tried
to cut in to dance and they would start �boogie wooging� their way right in and the guy I was dancing with would push him aside by smacking him with his hips sending the other guys bouncing across the floor� this continues for a while before I decided to head back to the group! The guys were getting a little out of hand.
I headed back to 6�5� football playing Ryan where I knew I would be safe. WHEW! We had a great night though and headed back to the ship around 6 AM. The following day I did the shopping thing again with Khiran but this time we decided to go to a more ethnic market. The rickshaw driver had other plans for us and drove us into the middle of a festival way out in the village! We drove around for an hour for who knows what but it was interesting to see. Finally we arrived for our destination T Nagar Market. The driver tried to rip us off but Khiran went crazy and told him off and walked away with all our money.
Throughout the day I was followed by a little boy begging at my side. I took a liking to him as he began to copy me and sounds I would make. He must have followed me for hours. Khiran and I stopped at a bakery and ordered some food including an extra pizza for my new friend. I gave it to him once outside but he did not even seem to want it� it was then that I noticed a midget man following closely watching our every move and figured it was his �pimp�. Children are often used as beggars and are pimped by a man who takes their money and in turn takes care of these homeless children.
I refused to give him any more than the food and we climbed into a taxi and headed back to the ship. That night we relaxed and prepared for the next day. The following day I left around noon for my service visit for children used in sweat factories called RIDE. We then took a bus for a 3 hour drive deep into rural India. Upon arrival I was greeted by all the village people as they stood on their front stoops watching and waving as I hiked down the dirt rode carrying only my backpack. Once at my families home I was served tea and a cracker and then we headed to a nearby school.
The school was a small room filled with around 20 children all sitting on the floor with either chalk and a small board or a pencil stub and a small note pad. The children were so happy to see me! They ranged from preschool to 2nd grade. They sang me songs and handed me their boards or paper pads so that I would sign them to show their parents. I handed out pens to all of them which was a huge hit! I said my goodbyes and headed to the village were the women held their support groups.
The whole village stood outside and greeted me with curiosity as I arrived. I spoke with the women about how the RIDE program was helping for the rights of the children and preventing child labor. At the end of the meeting all of the room came to meet me and introduced themselves and wanted to know my name and shake my hand! It was amazing and they were so kind. I showed them my video camera and they loved to look at themselves in the LCD screen! It was a big hit!
I continued into the village where I visited a loom with 2 men hand making fabric from silk, I also visited an Indian hut home. As I stepped outside I was horded with crowds of people wanting to shake my hand and have my autograph. They all wanted to have their pictures taken with their families! It was so touching. Their smiles felt so genuine and I really felt a part of their community! They were so happy to have me and the children were the best. I climbed back onto the bus as the village stood outside my window smiling and waving goodbye! I felt so good and could feel the love.
That night I enjoyed a traditional Indian dinner in the family�s home which I ate by hand. Then we headed to the cultural center were a dancing performance was held by some children. It was so cute and they were so excited to meet me. That night I fell asleep in my bag on the cement floor as the lightening and thunder bursted around me! The silhouette of the village under the lightening was amazing! The next day I hiked back through the village to my bus as the people came out to say their goodbyes! It was hard to leave this amazing community! On the trip home we stopped at a temple. I was blessed by the priest in a dark room lit by candle in the center of the age old, stone fortress! It was almost hypnotic!
The next 2 days I spent with my friends wandering around the city of Chennai doing some more shopping and interacting with the people. The last day in Chennai we headed to Mother Theresa�s Orphanage by rickshaw. Nobody in India seemed to know where it was but we finally managed to make it. I passed through the iron gate into the orphanage and was greeted by one of the sisters. The house was a 3 story building that resembled a church. What I was about to step into I did not prepare myself enough for. Once inside a few children that are mentally handicapped ran up to me grabbing at me wanting me to play with them, pick them up or whatever. I was in a large room lined with cribs. The cribs were filled with little bodies lying there motionless. Some were missing legs, some had no eyes, some had no idea that I was there or they were for that matter. I immediately ran right back out and tried to stop the tears that fell anyways. I did not want the children to see me so weak. I regained my composure and took a few breaths and stepped back inside� One child lay kicking his undersized deformed legs as he moaned an awful sound. His face was badly deformed. His mouth and nose were molded together and his hands attached to his shoulders. His body appeared to be the size of a 3 month old infant yet he was 3 years old. I tickled his tummy as he let out what seemed to be a laugh but when I stopped he moaned the most heart wrenching sound you can imagine as he spinned his little mangled body around his 4 by 2 foot crib. A small girl with the biggest eyes and brightest smile pulled at my leg and motioned for me to pick her up so I did. She laid her little pig tailed head on my shoulder and would not let go. I headed upstairs where their was more cribs with lifeless bodies and a row of boys laying on the ground as the sisters fed them what looked inedible.. a mashed compilation. I tried my best to make contact with all the children by stroking their arms and heads as they lay their. I took the little girl outside and let her down as she played... running after the birds. It was time to go but I could not move. I wanted to do more, I felt so helpless. I donated the rest of my money to the sister for the foundation and thanked her for her hospitality and thanked her for doing what she does. As I stepped out of the gate I was attacked by old beggars and taxi drivers� I hugged my purse and climbed into the rickshaw that dropped me off near the ship only to go through another crowd of less fortunate� I climbed on the ship not knowing what to think but that what I had just saw would forever burn in my memory�.
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�Don�t give to the beggars�
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. So I didn�t, and my heart ached as I
turned and walked away from a 4 year-old starving child.
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. So I hid my money and walked away from a
thin mother and her two children, carrying all my packages�
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. So I pushed away the little children
grabbing at my arms and tried not to cry.
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. So I laughed nervously as a leper
clutched at my friend, laughed because it was easier than to cry.
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. So I walked for blocks, trying to ignore
the kids at my side� running away instead of staying to help.
Don�t give to the beggars, they said. I thought I hadn�t, but I was wrong� I
did give, each and every time� a part of me, na�ve to the pains of others, to
the horror of others.
I gave them my innocence and they gave me their pain.
And after India I will never be the same.
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