My Native Tongue Is Blasphemy
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.:Comatose:.


This is one of my first songs that ever did an above average job of capturing how I felt at the time I wrote it. It is also the only song I've ever written that is directly about myself.

Throughout high school, I felt like people, especially staff, were assuming I had problems because I acted differently than they did. I smiled and laughed a lot, and would often get asked if I was drunk or high long before I drank or tried pot. Twice I was called to the guidance counsellor's office because of poetry I'd written that had nothing to do with my own feelings. It was as if people were trying to make up problems in my life because they couldn't explain the different ways I acted. Sure, I did Christina Aguilera airbands and always went all out for Spirit Week to get some attention, but not to cause trouble - I did things like that because I wanted people to laugh!

Back to the point, the ghost that the chorus refers to is the non-existent problems that keep vanishing anyone who worked at the school actually tried talking to me. And perhaps more significantly, "you learned how to close your eyes" refers to how I lost faith in the high school system because of the way they treated me.

Of course, it did take a certain amount of teenage angst to turn people's genuine attempts to care (Pinawa is paranoid about suicides and that sort of thing) into a complaint, but it wears on you as the years go by!


been thinking it's funny how
we've talked about
you like you're already gone
could never figure out
why without a doubt
some something had to be wrong

lamenting it's crazy though
we'd never know
what part of you was gone
could never come this close
to having hope
'cause something had to be wrong

you could see anything
you could be anyone
you learned how to close your eyes

you've gone comatose (comatose)
and you're just a ghost
but you're
you're
coming just as close
and you're just a ghost oh oh
coming just as close
you've gone comatose (comatose)
and you're just as close to hope

been dreaming of waking up
you've had enough
of wishing you were gone
could never be this rough
you're making up
why something had to be wrong

been tired of hearing our
sadness for hours
you're not already gone
you're not going anywhere
we couldn't care
cause something has to be wrong

you could see anything
you could be anyone
you learned how to close your eyes

you've gone comatose (comatose)
and you're just a ghost
but you're
you're
coming just as close
and you're just a ghost oh oh
coming just as close
you've gone comatose (comatose)
and you're just as close to hope

been walking with all of us
and our judging minds
been wishing that none of us
ever crossed your life
been praying that some of us
will someday realize

you could see anything
you could be anyone
you learned how to close your eyes and its all our fault

we're the ones who put this on you
we're the ones with something wrong
we're the ones who didn't trust you
we're the ones who should be gone

you could see anything
you could be anyone
you learned how to close your eyes and not to fantasize

i've gone comatose (comatose)
and i'm just a ghost
but i'm
i'm
coming just as close
and i'm just a ghost oh oh
coming just as close
i've gone comatose (comatose)
and you're just as close to hope




Copyright© Murat Ates 2004


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