Super man powers…just one at a time
Personally, I believe Superman went overkill with the powers. Originally, he was just a really strong and tough guy. Then, they kept piling powers up. It makes a person wonder what someone could do with just one of his abilities.
Therefore, lets see what happened to these "supermen" who were at random points in their lives given a little boost of the super variety. (Yes, women weren’t eligible, because then I couldn’t use the supermen tagline.)
X-ray vision was bestowed upon a Derek Walters:
Derek mainly used it in his very successful dentistry career. He was able to see cavities and infections before they became a real problem. Of course, he also abused (like any man in his position) the power. He looked through clothes, won card games and a variety of zany antics. That is until his wife got cancer. It quickly spread throughout her body making surgery not an option. He spent the next year watching the cancer eat away at her inch by inch from the inside out. He never used the power again after her death.
Super Strengh was bestowed upon a Steve Grousher:
Steve died in a car accident two days after getting the powers. He became enthralled with being able to life up couches and cars. While showing off at a party, he drank too much. Remember kids, Don’t Drink and Drive, because super-strength doesn’t always come with super-invulnerability.
Invulnerability was bestowed upon a Holden Mathews (sorry Steve):
Holden survived a giant statue of an eagle crashing onto him during a construction project. Believing his miraculous continued existence was based on a Native American bird worshiping tribe, he formed a cult. It wasn’t very popular, but very pacifistic.
Super Hearing was bestowed upon a Maximilian Robraf:
Initially, it was expected that Max would be driven insane with the sounds of an entire planet filling his mind every hour of the day. Somehow, he learned focus and amazing control. The world was his massive mp3 collection. He could listen to any song being played anywhere in the world. Strangely, he found an obscure pretentious Italian opera in one of his musical trips around the world. It played somewhere on the earth at least 7 times a day. Thus, he heard the same opera played with thousands of varying combinations of unique singers, bands, acoustics, and general mood. He makes his living working in a post office mostly clerical work, but in his mind, he continuously hears two fat singers pledge their love to each other.
Super Speed was bestowed upon a Melvin Spencer:
Spencer ran. Spencer ran fast. Spencer hit a tree. Spencer cracked his skull. Spencer doesn’t run anymore.
Eye blast, laser vision, heat beams, whatever you call it was bestowed upon a Stone Robertson:
Mr. Robertson never really got the hang of this power. Sure, he could make dried wood smoke a little, but an idiot with two sticks could do that. The extent of his power became giving people Indian burns from across the room. He did this a surprising amount of time. He even got onto a talk show. Of course, the audience just thought the volunteers were actors faking it. Eventually, he became a science fiction writer, conceiving of a popular series of novels based on a main character that ironically enough shot ice beams out of his eyes.
Flight was bestowed upon…well it actually missed:
Now in the suburbs of Chicago is a box that somewhat just floats there about 150 feet up. The residents refuse to let anyone disturb it including interested scientists, because it’s a real tourist attraction. Down there, they have flying box mugs, t-shirts, bumper stickers, and one man even got “The box just floats” tattooed on his arm.