The Interview with the Id
Now before anybody asks, this is not an interview with my Id, but some Id I found at the bus station. I paid him a sack of lard for this interview and I hope it turns out great. Now to begin�
Me: Hello and thank you for joining me today.
Id: FOOD! SEX! FOOD! DRUGS!
Me: Likewise, now I have always wanted to ask you this. Are you the pure essence of a person inhibited by the Ego and Superego or are you merely one-third of a person�s psyche?
Id: I�LL KILL YOU! I�LL RAPE YOU! I WILL FEAST ON YOUR FLESH!
Me: Ah, so you in essence a juxtaposition of gestalt theory, where you are fragment of a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts, but each part is integral. That is fascinating. Now I wonder how does these myriad of pieces form cognitive ideas?
Id: WANT TASTY FOOD SEX!
Me: I see, so to mediate conflicting ideas, compromises are formed.
Me: It is theorized that you are being gradually unleashed from the conservative and in some ways restrictive societies of the past by the many contemporary personal freedom movements. Do you validate this idea?
Id: I�LL KILL YOUR CHILDREN! (gurgling frothing sound roughly transcribed as �Blearregghaeert�)
Me: So you believe that the liberalization of society has not gone far enough and that society has not become free in the most true of sense. Now about the gradual tokenization of you as a mere sexual drive that pl-
Ego: (Interrupts) Hey you! What are you doing here? Who told you that you could run away. I turn by back one moment and you disappear on me.
Superego: Did you even consider what everyone would think of this incident?
Ego: Shush superego, I�ll handle it.
Superego: Mother always warned about this and she always said that you sho�
(Ego slaps Superego)
Ego: Quiet!
Id: ME WANTED LARD! ME PROMISED SEX!
Me: Uh, I hate to interrupt, but I need to make clear that no favors of the sexual sort were promised. The bag of lard was the sole medium of payment for this interv�
Ego: Stay out of this. Now Id come here and Superego...
Superego: Yes?
Ego: Shut up.
Id: I WANT IMMEDIATE GRATIFICATION!
Ego: That�s it! You�re going to be grounded to the sub-conscious for a week and Superego...
Superego: Yes?
Ego I told you to shut up!
(All three walk away)
Me: Uhm, I think they�re gone. In retrospect, I probably should have researched my subject more closely before the interview. But this has most assuredly been a memorable evening. Good Night to all of you out there, and if you know of someone who can get projectile spit out of a nice shirt, please notify me.