Lila stared once again at Brian’s muscular arms around her. The arms that she was so accustomed to. The ones that gave her a sense of security and tranquillity she couldn’t imagine her life without. Fighting hard not to let the tears which were burning at her eyes fall, she swallowed the lump that was beginning to form in her throat.

That was her problem. Her whole life revolved around Brian and his being there for her. What if he left her one day? What would she do without him? How would she survive?

Lila was so terrified that although Brian told her he loved her, one day he would leave her. Leave her all alone with no one to hold her, no one to lie next to her at night and most of all no one to love her.

Her tears began to fall now trickling down her cheeks first and then her neck. She felt horrible for even allowing such thoughts to exist in her mind, but she was so scared. Hopelessly scared of being alone.

He can’t leave me. There has to be a way, Lila told herself. I can’t let him leave me. Brian was her everything. She loved him more than life itself.

Looking down yet again, Lila desperately wished that she and Brian could stay just the way they were forever. She wished Brian would just hold her in his arms and never let her go. Pressing herself closer to Brian, she wrapped her arms tightly around him.

“I love you Brian,” she whispered through her tears. “I love you so much.”

When Nick awoke the next morning, he was greeted again by the dark, angry storm clouds, which hovered outside the motel window. Thankfully, it had stopped raining.

He got up from the hard, lumpy bed stretching his sore muscles. He had slept horribly. His 6 foot two inch frame was much too large for the bed and on top of that, he had woken up countless times during the night to images of Jessica. All Nick would see each time he was startled out of his slumber were her eyes. The eyes that told him that she had been hurt so badly that she couldn’t forget.

Sighing, he walked over to survey the scene outside his window. Images of Jessica flashed like rapid fire throughout his mind. The memory of her beautiful face was etched into his mind forever.

Suddenly, the memory of Jessica’s face after he had kissed her flashed in front of him. She had been so confused and so scared. But why? he demanded for the millionth time. He soon forgot his questions as he remembered the feel of Jessica’s warm body in his arms and her tender lips on his. He recalled everything down to the feel of her silky blonde hair as he had run his fingers through it.

Snapping his eyes open, he knew he had to see her. He needed to tell her how he felt. How he was sorry he had hurt her. He wanted her to know that he would be there for her if she needed him. He’d never leave her side if she asked him to stay with her.

Nick scrambled around the room quickly gathering his belongings. He ran his fingers through his tangled blonde hair as he gave the room the once over making sure that he hadn’t forgotten anything.

He dashed from his shabby room as he slammed the door shut. The sound resonated throughout the tiny hallway as he ran down it. Coming to a stop in front of the dingy elevators, he pushed the once white button roughly. When the button didn’t light up, he pushed it again frantically. Realizing that it was a lost cause, he sprinted down the hall towards the exit sign. Throwing open the door, he rushed down the stairs.

He entered the lobby, approaching the front desk in a hurry. Without even thinking, he reached into his pocket and retrieved a fistful of crumpled dollar bills. He slammed them onto the counter in a rush and began running towards the front door.

“Son! Don’t you want your change?” croaked an old man from behind the desk as he waved Nick’s change in the air. “Son?” he inquired again.

Nick didn’t care. He flew out of the motel quickly without even so much as a glance back. All he knew as he ran towards his car was that he had to see her. He had to hold her in his arms – even if it was just for a second. He needed to look into her eyes and tell that he loved her and that he needed her. Whatever it was that she was going through, they could go through it together.

Jessica lay in bed staring at the ceiling. Her eyes were puffy and swollen from crying the whole night. She was exhausted from lack of sleep. She had stayed up the whole night just thinking. Thinking about his smile, his voice, how easy it was to talk to him, his touch and of course his lips. When his lips had touched hers last night she had been consumed with dizzying passion. A passion so intense, like nothing she had ever experienced before.

A knock at the door startled her suddenly out of her daydream. She wanted to tell whomever it was to go away. To just leave her alone, but she was too exhausted to argue. Expecting to see either Lila or Elizabeth, she was surprised when Brian’s sandy blonde head peeked around the doorframe.

“Can I come in?” Brian asked softly.

“Door’s open,” Jessica replied her eyes wandering the room.

Brian walked in and closed the door gently behind him. Taking a seat carefully at the edge of Nick’s bed, he looked into Jessica’s eyes. “How you holding up?” he asked with genuine concern. Jessica didn’t answer the question. She played with the edge of Nick’s duvet, her eyes never meeting Brian’s.

“Jess. Look at me,” Brian instructed. “Everything will be all right,” he told her.

“Will it really Brian?” she asked her voice dripping with sarcasm. “I’m beginning to wonder here. I’m tired of everyone always telling me everything will be fine,” she said angrily. “It will never be all right,” she concluded stonily.

“Jess…” Brian started but Jessica interrupted him before he could get a word in edgewise.

“Even after what happened with Justin, everyone told me that I would be fine and you know what Brian? Like a fool I believed them. They said that the pain would go away, that I would stop hurting,” she yelled.

“It will Jess,” he soothed.

“When? When will it go away? There’s not a day when I don’t think about what he did to me. When I don’t remember how badly he hurt me,” she paused as she was overcome with a fresh batch of tears. “Why me Brian? Why did this have to happen to me?” she repeated. The last thing she wanted to do was cry, but she couldn’t help it. It hurt too much.

Brian wrapped his arms around Jessica in a comforting hug. He rubbed her back gently. Releasing Jessica, he looked at her seriously. “Life’s not always fair. Everyone goes through rough times Jess. The important thing though is how you overcome all those obstacles and challenges. You’re one of the lucky ones - you have so many people who care about you Jessica. You have to learn to trust again,” he said pausing. “Nick can be trusted. He’d never hurt you like Justin did,” Brian finished.

Brian’s words echoed loudly in Jessica’s thoughts. She knew he was right. She had known it from the very second that Nick had looked into her eyes that there was something special about him – that he would be different from Justin. He would never hurt her. Nick’s eyes were the eyes of someone that was incapable of harming anyone or anything. His eyes were those of someone who could be trusted, and now the eyes of someone she had fallen in love with.

“I know,” Jessica said finding her voice. “When Nick kissed me last night, I got scared. Scared because I enjoyed it, anticipated it even wanted it to happen. I thought that it meant that I was falling in love with him. I didn’t think I could handle that – not after Justin hurt me so badly. We were in love too,” she finished sadly.

“Are you in love with him?”

“Yes,” she replied simply without hesitation. She couldn’t deny her feelings for Nick any longer. They were so strong even after such a short time. “I’m in love with him,” she said again as a lone tear dripped down the side of her face. She had finally admitted it. The only person who needed to hear it wasn’t there though.

Unsure of what to say at Jessica’s heartfelt revelation, Brian sat in silence. Jessica fidgeted with a lock of her hair as she gazed distantly about the room. Brian decided it was time for him to leave. Jessica needed her space right now. “If you need anything at all Jess, we’re here for you. All of us,” Brian added sincerely. He rose from the bed kissing Jessica lightly on the forehead before he quietly left the room.

Thanks Brian. But the only I thing I need right now isn’t here, Jessica sighed burying her face in Nick’s pillow.

Nick stood outside his room shocked. He had been standing there for a while now. He had heard every single word she had said.

Nick had arrived home in a rush and burst through the front door. He had run into Lila and Elizabeth as he ran throughout the house calling Jessica’s name. The girls had both jubilantly thrown their arms around him glad that he had returned.

“Where is she?” he had demanded ignoring their inquisitive stares. They had had so many questions about his whereabouts, but had decided they would ask him later. Jessica needed him right now.

As Nick had bounded up the stairs, he had heard voices. Her unmistakable voice was like music to his ears. This time though, her voice was clearly marked with pain and fear. Nick had to stop himself from running inside and cradling her in his arms when he heard her sobs.

His mind was still reeling from everything he’d just absorbed in the past few minutes. How Jessica was scared, how Justin had hurt her terribly, how she couldn’t forget and how she was in love with him.

Just then, Brian came out of the room nearly running into Nick. “Nick! Where the hell have you been?” Brian asked in a loud whisper. When he got no response from Nick he continued. “Nick man. Jessica, she needs…” his voice trailed.

“I know. I heard,” he filled in as he stared longingly at his door.

“If you hurt her this time Nick…” Brian said knowing full well that it wasn’t necessary for him to complete the warning.

Nick nodded emphatically. “Trust me Brian I won’t. I could never hurt someone I care about so much.” With that he regarded the door determinedly. He had to tell her that he felt the same way she did. Knocking on the door lightly, he eagerly awaited Jessica’s response. There was no answer. He knocked yet again, louder this time.

Inside Nick’s room, Jessica lay in Nick’s bed, his pillows covering her ears as she listened to the loud knocking. She didn’t feel like seeing anyone. Except Nick. She couldn’t believe Brian would actually have the audacity to come back when he knew she wanted to be alone. She needed to sort through her feelings. It was so unlike Brian to do something like that.

“Go away Brian,” came her muffled reply from beneath the pillows.

The doorknob turned and the door creaked slightly as it opened. Jessica heard footsteps as Brian entered the room and then silence.

“Go away Brian! I don’t feel like talking anymore,” she shouted agitatedly.

“It’s not Brian,” Nick replied softly.

[Next Chapter].[Table of Contents].