Here in this time, this place
my hidden space
there's not a trace
and no excuse
for me,
I broke the truce.

If I'm the spoke
are you the wheel?
How much of this
do you really feel?
I'm hopeless not helpless,
I prefer it that way.

You're 
A chalk outline
in front of my car,
A vapid hallucination,
A slowly healing scar.

Why are you not bleeding?

I lived through you,
as we all must do.
I answer back,
and I am not
much like myself.

How can I get you
to rip it all away?
I'm hopeless not helpless,
I prefer it that way.

I want you without charm,
and choking on your laughter -
I don't want happy-ever-after
because frankly,
Dear Destiny,
I do not give a fuck.

I learnt to
duck and cover
hiding nothing,
climbing trees.

I want out of this 
hole in the ground
burnt charcoal mass
I take you in
I swallow you

I smothered my cries,
sweating and shameful.
I wished to leave myself behind,
to sap the world of kindness
and trace my eye in grey.

No, it's really not so bad
but still I turn away
and slowly, surely go mad.

You set the trap,
you broke my back.
My world's on instant re-cap,
I study what I lack.

I'm a distant shimmer,
an oasis to your dehydrated brain.
Wrap me up, I'm stronger
than your artful application of pain.

It's just a matter
of mattering less
of losing sight of the sky
and pulling out my teeth.

I'll stand and face 
this senseless world
if I can screw it
at the end.
I'm hopeless not helpless,
I prefer it that way.