Well Joe you seem to have a lot of swelling in the facial region underneath your eyes, and you're bruised up pretty bad. I imagine you'll have some serious migraines before it heals, so I'm going to prescribe some painkillers for that.
I have a migraine now doctor, and it's talking to me.
The doctor ignores the blatantly rude comment as Joe's friend Josh walks in with a paper.
Joe I did it!! I did it! What did you do?
I have made sure that you will meet Danger on THIS week's Brimstone in a Hell in a Cell rematch for the World Title!
No shit!
Yeah but there's a catch...
Oh no..what?
You had to join Capitol Carnage to do it.
Oh shit...you know my policy on stables, besides they tried to kick my ass for not joining. I got a cut over my eye because of it.
Well you're in, because I said you would.
You're not my agent, assmonkey!
Look, I am your friend and I didn't have to do this.
That's right. Oh well how bad could it be? I'll win the World title and then we'll go from there. I hope they realize I don't want or need their help.
Rick Havoc didn't want you to have it either, that's why he made the match a Hell in a Cell.
Great. Just great.
If I may be so bold as to make a comment..
What?!
I'm not too sure I can clear you to go into the ring on Saturday.
Like I care. I'm going to be World Champion. Danger's stealing the spotlight of someone FAR more deserving than he ever could or would be. I don't need your clearance.
Yes you do.
I'll pay you 1000 to keep your mouth shut.
Deal.
Josh sets up a camera while they are talking.
I gotta do one now?
Do what now?
I'm not allowed to say.
It's against the rules.
Well how is anyone supposed to know what you're doing?
Beats me.
Joe looks in a mirror and notices a lot of red in his eyes like maybe a blood vessel burst.
Oh don't worry about that, it will go down with the swelling. It's not a burst blood vessel.
It'd better not be. Josh are we set up?
Just about. Ready to roll camera?
Let's do it.
Josh hits record and away we go!
Well it's just a mere 34 minutes since I've been defeated by Danger. Yes, I was beaten by Danger. Shocking isn't it? Danger you finally won the big one. You're finally a World Heavyweight Champion. Don't brag for too long because in just 1 week that belt will be mine. You may have beaten me, but it took you not one, two three four or even five...but a total of SIX Danger Zones to do it. That not only shows that I can take a lot of punishment, but it shows that unlike any typical wrestler, your finisher cannot hurt me. I'm still on a high of how good I actually am. It took six, and if I had actually hit the Solitaire Unraveling, it would only have taken one. Think about that.
Now before I go back to our match, I want to make some comments regarding a recent tape I watched which featured you at a building which was supposed to be ICW HQ. Danger, I'd hate to tell you but ICW HQ is alive and well. It's in perfect condition. Why? Because I own the building and I havent' sold it yet. As far as any arenas go, the only arena we use when we go to New Jersey is the Continental Airlines Arena. And if THAT was destroyed, then you'd have the cops on your ass in a heartbeat. So I'd say that was just a random building.
But then if you're "God" then you'd know that wouldn't you? Speaking of which, but how in the hell can you claim yourself to be God? "Gods Don't Lie!" You're an idiot. A psychopathic idiot. If you were God then you could make me just fall down with a FINGER POKE OF DOOM instead of nailing me with six Danger Zones. You're not God, but you're God-Awful. I mean you don't have any talent. And I've wrestled you, I know. The pin was a fluke, and you out of anyone should know it. MWF knows it, that's why I've been granted a rematch. The fans know it, that's why they BOOED when I was pinned. You're a joke Danger. And worse off, you're not even funny! You're like a MADTV joke. You have won the big one, but it's also the only one. You won't defeat me at Hell in a Cell, Brimstone, April 3. I can guarantee you that much.
Actually I can guarantee you more. I can guarantee that you are in for the hardest fought match of your career. I can guarantee that not even six Danger Zones could put me away this time. I can guarantee that since I know how you wrestle, I can now adapt. I can guarantee that you will not win. When we are in that ring, and I put you in the Beginning of the End, remember this. Resistance is Futile: Tap Out.
Next week it's going to be MWF World Heavyweight Champion, Joe Cool, fighting either Matt Ward, Pozen or Skwerl. So it looks like in the weeks leading to my match with Rick Havoc, for the ICW World Heavyweight title, I have an easy time. Danger, whether you like it, or you don't, you'd better learn to love it, as Ric Flair used to say. Because I am going to win this match, and you ARE a loser. And that's the truth, not because I'm a psychopath claiming to be God, but because I'm Joe Cool, and you're just a punk. But hey, I'm not telling you anything that you don't already know.
Who is it?
It's God.
DANGER? Get away from my locker room!
NO I'm kidding, it's just your brother, open up!
Joe opens the door to infact reveal that it is his brother GI. Joe slaps him on his knee which makes him cringe a bit and Joe laughs at him.
How's the knee?
Sore. Mind backing off?
What are you doing here?
Gi starts talking then catches a glimpse of Joe's face.
Well I just renewed my contract and am no longer on leave after this week's Brimstone...HOLY HELL! what happened to your face?!
He lost to Danger.
YOU LOST TO DANGER?!?! BWHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
It did take six Danger Zones to do it.
Oh well that's different. Please tell me you got a rematch.
Yes I did. And this time Danger will not win.
What do you say we go get some drinks to celebrate my return and your impending World title win?
Sure, let's go.
The scene fades out with Josh, Joe and GI all leaving together.