JC: Hello?

Kanich: Joe you got a problem, this is Kanich.

JC: No wonder I got a problem look who is calling me up!

Kanich: Very funny. I'm serious you got something we need to talk about. A new commish.

JC: Well you can assign one, that's why you're the new VP of ICW. Who'd ya pick?

Joe takes a drink of some bottled water as Kanich tells him

Kanich: You're not gonna like this, JJ Crawford.

As though it was a cartoon, Joe does a spit-take, spitting the water all over the floor from the announcement.

JC: I'm coming over to ICW HQ, and I'm kicking your ass.

Kanich: Hey don't even blame me! You can blame Orb!

JC: What do you mean, blame Orb?

Kanich: He cost me that concentration camp match at ICW Retribution! JJ and I had agreed if he won that match, I'd lose my job as commish of ICW, and he'd get it! Luckily you signed me as a VP...but JJ is now the commish thanks to that SOB Orb!

JC: I think I'm gonna be sick. What's the damage?

Kanich: Well I'm not sure, I'm in Chicago right now, setting up for Anarchy. JJ called and said Joe had better get to ICW HQ, cuz he was leaving and there's no one in charge.

JC: Oh boy. Looks like a job for Joe Cool, ICW Prez.

Joe hangs up the phone and decides since it's nice outside, he'll walk to ICW. He doesn't take too long to get there, and when he does he goes to the receptionist desk.

Receptionist: Good evening Mr. Jackoff...I mean, Mr. Cool, how may I help you today?

JC: Nothing Mrs. Bitch, oh I mean..Sara. There, consider yourself paid back. I'm guessing JJ was by here too.

Sara: Yes he was sir. Do you really think I'm a bitch?

JC: Of course not, but ya talked to one today and that makes you one by association for the day. Just don't talk to JJ unless ya have to.

Sara: Yes sir.

JC: When I find that punk, I'm gonna tear him into pieces! And then I'm gonna tear those pieces into tiny pieces, and then tear THOSE pieces into TINIER pieces.....

Sara: Sir, you're rambling.

JC: You'd ramble too if you knew what kind of a day I've had.

Joe goes into the elevator and hits the number 5.

JC: Oh man..note to self...FIRE the guy who controls this shitty ass music. IMMEDIATELY!

Joe gets out and goes to the left, as he sees staff members smoking and drinking coffee, muttering about JJ.

Worker #1: Man who hired that guy anyway? Tellin us to get back to work...what an idiot.

Worker #2: You're tellin me! We do get coffee breaks, he doesn't even know that.

Joe walks up to them.

JC: But you don't get smoke breaks in the middle of the office! Put those cigarettes out! This is an internship meaning I can fire ya if I want and won't lose any money.

Worker #1: Uh..yes sir Mr. Cool. We were just smoking due to stress caused by JJ...

JC: Even JJ is no excuse to smoke in my ICW building. Put those out and get back to work.

Joe goes to JJ's office and tries to open the door, but, being the Prez he has access to any and all rooms, unlike the commish, so he uses his key to open it. JJ's personal assistant Kelly is at the desk talking to friends on the phone as Joe slowly walks in.

Kelly: Oh I know, he's such a total hottie! Oh of course I'd do him in a minute!

JC: Ahem.

Kelly: Shit. I gotta go girl.

Kelly immediately hangs up the phone and stands up, flattening her skirt and fixing her hair.

Kelly: Ahem..Hello Mr. Cool..Mr. Crawford is not in right now but can I do something for you?

JC: No, the look of embarrassment just about made my day. I just wanted to make sure everything is appropriate.

Joe takes a look around, and notices the desk is scuffed from shoes on it.

JC:(sighs) Man this guy is pissing me off in any little way he can. Kelly, do me a favor..get a job. Get something, hell even a stripper would be better than having to be JJ's personal assistant..that's like the lowest of the low.

Kelly: Are you firing me? But I like my job.

JC: No I'm not firing you. Forget I said anything. Just to let you know, that phone is JJ's personal office line, meaning he has to pay the bill. (smiles) So feel free to continue talking on it! As a matter of fact, I'll let you have overtime hours if you talk as long as you like on that line.

Joe leaves the office and looks on his watch that a board meeting is just finishing, he decides to go to it. He almost is there until he sees head of marketing, Peter, crying in a corner.

JC: Um..Pete..you're crying. I know the Best of JJ Crawford tapes were a bad marketing idea, but it's no reason to cry!

Pete: Do you think that's why he fired me? Cuz I didn't go ahead with it??

JC: JJ fired you?

Pete: Yeah, and even when I told him I gotta support my family...he said he didn't care! I can't go home and face them Mr. Cool.

JC: Well of course not, you shoulda kicked his ass for doin that. But hey, I'm a nice guy, so you're hired again. Come in tomorow for contract signing.

Pete: Thank you! I will be here.

Joe walks to the office room and goes inside as they are busy finishing up the meeting. He looks at Tina and Ryan, who are the only ones in the room.

JC: What's the damage, I know he was in here.

Ryan(snickering): Where'd ya get this guy, Joe? He thinks he can control salaries!

JC: Well to a certain extent he can...what did he try to do?

Tina: Well for one, he gave your brother a raise, gave Bob Rocket a decrease in pay, and switched his and your pay.

JC: Well then lower my brother's salary, 50 thou is too much for him, and GI knows it. he's supposed to get 15, but I guess I'll raise it to 20. GI won't have a problem, he's having a hard time spending the money he gets already, JJ'd drive him nuts giving him 50 thou a year! Maybe that was his plan. As far as Rocket goes, leave his as 10 thou, as Kanich's the one who gave him that high salary and I didn't agree with it. And for crying out loud, reduce JJ's to 50 thou and raise mine up 75 thou! 100 is too much for anyone.

Ryan: Yes sir. What about the fine?

JC: The fine?

Tina: JJ placed a fine on you sir. Should I take it off?

Yes and give him a 500 dollar fine for not knowing his boundaries as ICW commish.

Ryan: He's also fired your personal limo driver.

JC: What personal limo driver? That guy drives all head staff guys around, so he just fired his OWN personal limo driver!

Ryan can't hold it in his continues laughing.

JC: Ryan you obviously deserve a break, so you can regain your composure. Take the rest of the night off, most people are leaving so you shouldn't have to work overtime tonight.

From now on, white=Joe Cool, and pink=Mandy

Joe leaves the office and the scene fades.........it soon reopens back in Joe's house, with Joe's camera flashing on pause. He's scanning the ICW's TV station for promos to be aired to see if JJ has done one. When seeing nothing, he turns off the TV and looks up to see Mandy looking down on him. She bends over and kisses him on the forehead then sits in his lap.

Somebody's playful aren't they?

Somebody's glad their husband is home, I missed you and you've been very busy lately, what with several guys quitting, including the vice president.

Well you won't have to worry soon, as I got Kanich the new VP, and as soon as I beat JJ's ass at Anarchy I'll be home a lot more.

Can I talk to you about that?

Sure babe, what about it?

Joe takes a sip of water...uh oh...

I don't think you should go through with it.

Joe spits the water out over the side of the chair, another classic spit-take.

I'll never get to drink water in peace...What do you mean I shouldn't go through with it!?

Well it's just that I can't see Candy anymore, cuz you're paranoid about me going over to her house, and she's terrified to come over here, plus JJ's not gonna let her come over here.

Ah Mandy I see your point. Don't worry, JJ can't stop Candy once I cripple him.

You're going through with it!?!? Why?!

The real question is, why not? This man needs a serious, no pun intended, attitude adjustment. He thinks he can do whatever the hell he wants, when he wants, and quite frankly, a 3 stages of hell match is the only way I can maim him legally.

But I thought you were friends with him Joe..

Funny thing is, I thought so too. Mandy, this isn't just some fued with an asshole. This isn't a fued with a stablemate who turned on his partner....JJ the closest thing to a brother without actually being related to me, and he stabbed me in the back. That just hurts. Nevermind you wouldn't understand.

Joe, I understand fully. Since you are going to use no other option, I'm going to do what I always do when you have your mind set on something.

Oh come on! That's just wrong to make me not get any from my own wife cuz I want to fight in a match!

That's a good idea, but I normally do that when I think you're being stupid and stubborn. In this case, I support you.

Mandy wraps her arm around Joe and kisses him. Then hops up and heads to the bathroom.

I'm going to take a shower, and then I'm going to the bedroom, wearing nothing. Be there.

Mandy closes the door and Joe chuckles to himself.

I love that woman. Well let's see if Jackass Jones did a promo yet.

Joe turns the TV on and it says "ICW's own commish, JJ Crawford", and a promo airs. Joe watches, and the usual emotions come forward, mainly anger. He turns on the camera.

Well, it's that time of year. Spring has arrived, which means new starts for everything. And indeed, this is a new start for ICW. We have a great roster, great ratings and fans, and an almost great staff. Our commish could be replaced to make ICW the perfect organization, but hey, contracts is contracts sez I. JJ Crawford vs Joe Cool. Who woulda thunk it? I mean, these two guys were friends weren't they? Is this match really happening? To answer all your specualtion, this match is indeed happening. All the weeks of screwjobs, attacks and mind games have finally come to a head. Joe Cool will indeed go up against JJ Crawford, for nothing other than pride and revenge. But revenge for whom, against whom? The answer is obvious. I'm out to get revenge on JJ, for doing something worse than costing me a match, hitting me with a chair, or verbally abusing me. JJ, you turned on your best friend. You turned on me. At first I was in total shock. I went insane for a brief amount of time. But even before that, I was like President Bush, in the fact I had to run through every possible option in my mind before finally settling on going to war. War it is. Deplomacy is not an option JJ, I'm going to the battlefield, the wrestling ring and I'm going to eliminate your punk-ass from ICW.

This match is just based on revenge. I'd hate to use a cliche that many people use in their interviews, but the PPV name fits us. Anarchy. Do you know what Anarchy means? Lack of control, no leadership, chaos. Chaos. That is what will happen, chaos. Only controlled chaos, as in, I'm going to be controlling this match, and I will decide when it ends. Or maybe the EMT's will restrain me to take you to the hospital, whichever comes first. JJ, not only is this match very very personal, but I know the fans are looking forward to it. This is a legenadary match, sure to be..entertainment? Sure if JJ getting beat so bad there won't be nothing left except maybe a few chunks for a coroner's table is entertainment, then yeah, it's entertainement. Look at it this way, on one hand, you've got the Living Legacy, the King of High Risk, one of the best ICW has to offer, one of the most talented individuals in wrestling history, and on the other hand you got...JJ Crawford.*

Just who is JJ Crawford? A punk. JJ, you are literally nobody. I have may have said this before, but the reason it took me so long to sign this match was, and seriously JJ, relax, don't have a heart attack and get ready to be shocked JJ, because what I have to say now will rock your foundation. The world, does not revolve around you! Yeah I think I did say that before! Maybe because I have to repeat myself because there's so many things you don't get through that thick skull of yours! But anyway, I think I'll take the time to respond to your promo. I don't know why I should waste the time, but hey Mandy's not out yet, so I gotta do something before she's finished showering.

At least one fall of this match will be classic wrestling. Don't worry JJ, that's not the last time I'll be saying you're wrong in this whole spiel. See, one fall was of my choosing, a submission match. Why did I choose this fall? To crush your ego. JJ Crawford has never tapped out, ever. Isn't that something? Even I have tapped out, even if it was only in an Iron Man match so I wouldn't get something broke and not be able to continue the match, which had about 20 minutes left. JJ Crawford, in this history of his career, has never tapped out. Until this Wednesday that is. I chose this fall because this is my sure fire way to gain a fall over you. You may somehow, if Lady Luck is on your side, win that cage/weapons fall, but you will not beat me in the submission fall, or the last man standing fall. I'll get to the latter in a few. I am the best submission wrestler in ICW, or the business for that matter. I can make ANY man tap out. No matter the size, stamina, or pure determination. And JJ, you're not anything more than a man. You may be less than a man, but your certainly not anything more, meaning you're not immune to my holds. I target a body part, and remove it from the equation. As always with my opponents, you have two options. Tap out, or never wrestle again. As far as that goes, you know what has a bullseye in this match, your knee, and if you don't tap out, you may never walk again for that matter.

If we make it to the Last Man Standing, which I doubt, you stand no chance in that either, JJ. You have no choice over being able to stand, or stay conscious. I either knock you out cold, or your knee will be so torn apart you won't be able to get up. This match suits me so many ways it's not even funny. Well, it's funny for me, for you it may not be.

You compare me to Goldberg, well, in a way you're right about that. Goldberg is a massively dominant man, he's hardly ever lost, and when he did it was via screwjob. Goldberg has held multiple titles, but that's where the similarties end. Let's compare JJ to a wrestler! How about Triple H, the guy you looked up to! Triple H, once was a terrible terrible wrestler, JJ was once a terrible terrible wrestler. HHH, found success by making a gimmick which was basically a stuck up degenerate, same goes for you. HHH finally impressed people by wrestling good matches, with a bad ass gimmick, but maybe too late in his character before an injury took him out. When he tried to come back after that injury, he was a shell of his former self and dispite gaining wins, HHH is now a terrible wrestler like he started out as, and will never be able to achieve the status he once earned. Just like JJ Crawford. No one has any respect for HHH because of the fact he puts himself before others and is still main eventing dispite the fact he doesn't have what it takes anymore. Just like JJ Crawford. Man that's more similarities than you thought I had with Oldberg. Go figure.

You say I'll be completely be erased from the wrestling world, well, that's wrong. I'll never be erased until years after my retirement. Maybe not even then. I'm still in my prime, no big injury has ever sidelined me, and I'm in peak condition. Maybe in ICW this may be my last match, as I need to focus on my presidential duties more, and after I beat you, I should take a vacation from the ring.

I don't accept that stipulation about Big J, because let's face it, do you really want to screw any chance Big J has of getting back into ICW like that?

You say I'm easily amused? I must be, I put up with you didn't I? Let's face it you're a very amusing person, even when you don't intend to be. You're a joke JJ. An utter waste of ICW's and my time. You don't have what it takes to do anything, you're washed up, nothing. A fucking joke. And you know what? Your career is the punchline.

I've went through pain before, I've lost blood before. I can take it. The thing about pain is, you just have to turn it off sometimes. Only a rare few people can do that. I'm one of those few. You cannot JJ. You cannot take it, I know it. Deep down inside you have guilt over what you've done. You've stabbed me in the back, you are a traitor. You may hate me, but I'm indifferent to you. You know what indifferent means? No? How about apathetic? It means I don't care! You could die, like..tomorrow, I wouldn't be happy over it, I wouldn't be sad over it, I just wouldn't care. I'd say, "oh well, it's a loss", and start looking for a new commish. I disown you as a friend, JJ, I could care less what happens to you. You did that to yourself. When everyone turned their back on JJ, your best friend, excuse me, your now FORMER best friend, Joe Cool stuck up for you, supported you...you've lost that JJ. Think about it.

The indignities I've suffered at your hands, too many to count. You caused me to go insane briefly. You made me lose blood, suffer pain, embarrassment, and due to the previous things mentioned, I lost love from my fans, at least for a little bit. It's sad when you think about it. I shouldn't be fighting you. I shouldn't be in this match. You drove me to this, and now you must pay for your descripencies. I'm sorry JJ, it's time to die.

I've tried to hide behind people? Like who? Orb turned on me too and sided with you, and you hided behind him. Skwerl, Danger, Grimwaltz, Care, well if you think I hid behind them you are just plain stupid. I mean, come on, if you think I book a match to hide from JJ Crawford you are just about the biggest idiot I've ever seen, and are obviously so conceited you can't even see the truth before your eyes. Yeah, I booked JJ in a CW title match to hide from him. Wow that makes a lot of fucking sense, you assmonkey. As far as that never-was Reaper, just because he didn't like you doesn't make it my problem. The Avenger? Hell he came to me! How in the hell can I hide behind someone that WANTS to help you?! The Avenger walked up to me, and said, and I have no idea why, that he looked up to you. He wanted to team with you cuz your his *laughs* idol, and he wanted to make you proud of him. Yeah, can you say, "JJ is a retard?" Good, I thought you could. Judgement wanted me to sign that match he was in, I mean you get the guy arrested and beat him up, he's gonna want revenge. You are fucking pathetic JJ, when you can find a real statement that even though it may be wrong at least it makes sense, and not in that "I'm high" type way, let me know. Seriously.

When Judgement fought you, I didn't want him to. I mean, come on, he'd tear you apart! And he basically did just that throughout the match! It took Orb to...you know what? I'm not even going to start this arguement, as I am going to make you look stupid, even though you don't need my help, via video tape!

Joe puts a tape inside the VCR and points the camera at it. It's a clip from ICW Retribution.

DL: Judgement catches him coming down with a powerslam right into the hard ground!

RD: JJ's expresssion says it all he is in agony here! Judgement then drags The Living Legacy towards the cell, before JJ manages to nail him with a shot to the gut. JJ then sets him up for a middle rope Russian Legsweep, but The ICW Commish elbows The Living Legacy in the face before Powerbombing JJ back into the dirt once again.

DL: Judgement signals for the Devil's Drop...hey wait what's this..ORB!! Orb is here too damnit! They have an alliance and Orb just nailed Judgement in the head with a shovel...and there's the Keg Stand onto the dirt! Damnit! This isn't right!

RD: Yes Love but it's no DQ! Orb had to knock down security to get in here though you can see them laid out. He tosses Judgement into the cell and helps JJ to his feet. This match is over and JJ is the winner.

It's ok JJ, I'm sure this isn't the first time you felt stupid. Judgement mauled you, and if it wasn't for Orb you'd have lost. The facts are right there. Orb had to help you stand up for crying out loud! You say I underestimated you, well in a way I did, I underestimated the fact you'd try to get help for your match. I shoulda increased the security!

I told you JJ, that starting a fight with me was one you didn't want to start. It's still not, but right about now the only option you have is to simply not show up at the arena. I had a game plan JJ, first I worked on the mind, then you'd be perfectly ready for me to disect the body. You say I'm stupid, and you're the one who says the bullshit you said. Gameplans work in a lot of instances, the only thing that I have left to do is tear you apart. You say I'm the only one left, I was the only one here! I say it took you damn long enough to finally challenge me. I was waiting for you. The bait was thrown, it just took you awhile for your mind to process so I could get the oppurtunity to kick your ass. Now that you've made the challenge, the match is made, and there is no turning back. It's time to enter hell JJ....3 stages..haha I love cheap puns..JJ, it's time for you to step up and be a man, something you've probably never done before. It's time for you to grow a set, cuz let's face, you're going to need it, if you plan on surviving. And even if you plan on surviving...you won't be able to, because I won't let you. But I'm not telling you anything, that you don't already know.

The scene fades as Joe turns off the camera and leaves to join his wife.....

*copyright(c) The Rock, 2003