The Susceptibility Test
Because I’m so nice, I’ve decided to
help you. With this simple test, you can work out where your ultimate pitfalls
lie. There are many creatures whose existence is ignored by the masses, but
that just makes it even easier for said creatures to wreak their own special
brands of havoc. Just answer the questions below, and it’ll tell you what
you’re susceptible to, and also fool-proof ways to defend yourself against
them. If you ignore my advice and then get bitten by a short man in a hat,
don’t come crying to me.
1. You are most likely to be found:
a) in the supermarket
b) looking for lost objects
c) looking for miracle solutions to problems
d) spreading gossip
e) exploring remote caves in remote regions
a) food
b) a lot of random junk
c) a lottery ticket
d) incriminating photos
e) matches
a) wouldn’t eat your greens
b) could never find your toys
c) were a demanding little brat
d) pulled people’s hair
e) played with swords. Nobody knew quite how you got them.
a) to get a job and live a decent, normal existence.
b) to improve your memory
c) to get a lot of money without any apparent effort
d) to get what you want. At any cost.
e) to save the world and become a noble hero
a) nice music, a comfortable routine and cheese
b) going shopping, memory aids and large, unloseable objects
c) lazing around, get-rich-quick schemes and game shows
d) gossip, getting revenge on exes and other peoples’ misfortunes
e) fighting, fantasy novels and being hailed as a courageous hero
a) It doesn’t matter what the outcome of this quiz is, I shan’t believe you.
b) You haven’t seen my wallet, have you?
c) Am I getting paid for this?
d) Oh, are you going? Good. Now I can talk about you.
e) We’re finished? Excellent. I must be off to defeat some bad guys.
OK. Now add it all up.
a) – 1 point
b) – 2 points
c) – 3 points
d) – 4 points
e) – 5 points