The Mariposa Dictionary

These are words in my personal vocabulary that either mean something different to me than to the rest of the world, or that I have just made up because I was bored. It’s not likely to make that much sense, but never mind.

 

munter - person made ugly by horrible personality/lack of personality, who may well be ugly anyway, but still.

bitch - person one’s crush fancies.

wankfox - nasty git.

oxymoron - airhead.

je-ne-sais-pas-ing - French.

Pollickipungz - any foreign man (yes, there is an explanation for this, available on request)

a 14.20 - a secret kept from you by someone you trusted.

NUTS - (Neurotic Unprovoked Titulative Syndrome) The disease which prompts someone (i.e. me) to give names (e.g. Fred) or titles (e.g. Mr.) to inanimate objects (e.g. strawberries, dartboards, freezer bags) or abstract concepts (love, perseverance, existentialism). Also works with brand names (Mr. Cadbury, Mr. Smirnoff, Mr. Coca-Cola)

Sour Milk - a friendship/friend gone bad/sour/smelly.

a PIB - (Pop Idol Brain) A stupid person or a barren wasteland, whether ecological, metaphysical or, erm, anything else.

Sainsbury level - a stupid comment/activity/person.

BC – (Bizarre Crush) Person who has devastating effect on another for no apparent reason.

 

Whoopsie-doodle – an exclamation on accidentally committing a clumsy act.

 

a Mischief – an almost physically perfect male.

 

MAD – (Monday Afternoon Disease) a bout of insanity that seems to hit at the same time every week.

 

Having sandwiches – being, erm, physically intimate, but usually in the less elegant sense of the phrase, if you catch my drift.

 

Mosquito – unappealing male who refuses to leave you alone – to buzz off, if you will.

 

Leprechaun – male who, when in a club, believes that the correct way to dance is to flail his legs about like an incompetent Russian dancer.

 

Maggot – person who is socially beneath you, but you like anyway (term of endearment)

 

Gald – person obsessed with world domination; communist.

 

Spangtabulous – wonderful, great, superlative.

 

Galox – ignorant person, one who becomes annoying. (Thanks Mark.)

 

Incrofmance – incomprehensible philosophy.

 

Ish – a relatively young person going through a pseudo-deep phase.

 

Aardvark – alternative to “thingy” when the required word has temporarily slipped the memory.

 

Poslavic – corrupted form of “polysyllabic”; indicates one with sub-par intellectual skills.

 

Bollocks McGrue – expression of annoyance (courtesy of Jess.)

 

Snough - a cross between a sneeze and a cough. (Also coeeze).

 

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