..i hate cats

I hate everything about this cat. From the way it looks at me with its stupid eyes to the way it meows forever.
This kitten cat has emotional problems. It's so undecided. One minute it'll be all crazy and hissing and trying to slap you with it's pathetic excuse for a paw, then it wont stop meowing. Not only does it meow like a little bitch, but extremely loud. Once you pick it up and and pet it in your lap, it's all of a sudden happy. This shouldn't be natural, to go from total distress to extreme solace. It doesn't end there though because the moment you quit petting her she'll get all hyper and confused (like the child with ADD would) to the point where you want to slap her. Once you slap her she'll freak out and try to hide making one feel sorry and pet her again and then BOOM, she's all content again. That's a sign of stupid. No one lets the person who just slapped them pet them. They're bound to get slapped again.

I'm pretty sure you'll enjoy A.D.D. anyway, despite my opinions. I guess its cute the way it ... it .. the way it suddenly loves you again, I guess.

--oh yeah, it has this stupid kink in it's tail, but you could probably cut it off or something if it really bothers you.

A.D.D.

Everyone seems to like this kitten, but I think its just retarded. Everyone has been commenting on how nice it is and calm and well natured and cautious and blah blah blah. Who cares, it's stupid. All I see is an ugly good for nothing undersized mount of garbage who if not retarded would be suspect to pregnancy.

Besides, it doesn't do anything. Every time I step into their room it stands frozen or hides its head avoiding as much movement as possible. It has come in contact with me several times a day for 5 days and all I've done is fed it. Well, this leaves out the first day where I grabbed it by the tail and departed it from its mother. But the other two don't act stupid when I walk in and hide like a little reject and I've never slapped it.. the other two, yes.

If you're looking for a kitten with semi-long hair, a messed up color pattern (black w/faded brown stripes.. Well not even stripes .. random slim patches), lack of growth (it wont get very big), mental disorder, reproduction problems.. It'll seriously be too stupid/undersized to get pregnant, --then Dizzle is the kitten for you.
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I have just about nothing to say for this other than it looks like a monster. It eats too much, it's semi-fluffy, and it'll grow to a decent size (I favor the cats we have with growth shortage). He'll be healthy, and he'll get fat and is just about everything one would want in a good for nothing semi-fluffy gray cat that eats too much and has fat paws. He'll be playful, so if you're old and want him prepare to get the shit scratched out of you and if you have kids and still want it ... I'm sorry he doesn't come with health insurance and if he eats your kid I wont take it back as I wont take back any other cat you decide to take.

This is all that applies to the cat, everything else is predictable

hold mouse over pictures to watch them transform

IMPORTANT NOTICE
(please read)
before continuing, if you find any of this material/contenet offending to animals or yourself in anyway then pretend what all that I've written is false and none of these animals indicated exists. Also, if you feel the need to report animal cruelty, which there clearly is none, don't because ... none of it is true. Remember and keep in mind that I feed these cats every day, I buy them food, I allow them or have no control over them to poop in my yard. I occasionally touch them in an attempt to pet them and avoid doing so as much as possible and that is acceptable because they have each other to love. They are given clean water everyday and fresh air. With that, they are stupid, good for nothing, worthless, smelly, over priced, and too much to take care of in the first place -- so there is no reason for you to care about them, you are not taking care of them.

What's available:

All right, a new generation of unwanted kittens have begun. For starters, there are three of a litter of five staged in a ... let's say room. They are a number of weeks old, which is old enough to say they eat dry and wet food and have been separated from their mother over five days. They're still kittens, they may have grown up too early. No, I refuse to potty train them, you can do it yourself, its real easy. Its so easy I'm not going to bother. My minor attempt to, lead them to piss in their bed box and sleep in their litter box. At least either go in a box. Really I would have preferred both in one box closed with air holes in the corner of the other end of the house, but that's neglect which is a $500 + fine I refuse to pay for something that stupid. However, I will pay you or anyone you happen to know who will take or do away with one. Any takers?? You're paid each time, but, if you happen to chose to take money to do away with one, it didn't come from me and it's not a cat/kitten.

There are also five more kittens somewhere almost old enough to be taken from their mother as well if she hasn't already killed them.. she's good at that. She never intends to, it just happens. She'll usually have each kitten in an entirely different spot and forget where each is. Occasionally she'll answer to the agonizing cry of one out of many that go on for hours ... nights in hunger. Although, she usually wont do anything about it, perhaps a lick on the head to let it know she heard it, but with her short attention span that's usually all the attention she can provide them. ..meh, now that I think about it, they probably have died so forget I ever talked about five other kittens that may be ready to adopt. They were ugly anyway and would be mistaken for rats.

There is a recent litter which was born just a week ago and will be available to be done with next month. These are indoor kittens, birthed by that f---ing Jada. I knew I should have kicked her. She gave birth before I realized she wasn't just getting fat. Stupid fat ass. I knew something was up when she wouldn't leave under the sink. Next thing I knew she had ruined my perfectly well fixed meal with the disturbing sound of the whole birth process. Every sound about it was upsetting from her to her kittens. How I wanted to shoot her is indescribable. Anyhow, She had either three grays and two blacks or two blacks and three grays. That's what someone said, I refuse to verify because if I see a life of them they'll never see life again.

Remember: I am not responsible for the behavior of these animals. If you choose to adopt one, its at your own risk. I WILL NOT take back any cat you take. Any cat you take and have a problem with, well its your problem to deal with, not mine. The profiles I've provided for each cat are based on my own opinion. If you adopt one and decid that what you've experienced with the cat contradicts what you read about it, that's your opinion and I say its wrong. If not, then you changed it, that's your fault, I wont take it back. Further more, if you choose to take a kitten, you are agreeing that under NO CIRCUMSTANCE, NO CONDITION will I accept any kitten/cat back. (If you try to, I'll deny ever having anything to do with it and its existence -- kitten, what kitten? No, sorry, your mistake, never heard.) NO. IF you happen to find a reason that makes it impossible to keep the kitten/cat you chose or decide it wasn't a good idea to adopt in the first place, then do away with it, give it away, sell it, shelter it, shoot it, throw it food onto the highway, I don't care -- just don't bring it to me. Don't even ask me what you should do with it, I have no advice for you and please don't tell me what you plan on doing with it, I don't want to know.
Which reminds me, don't update me on any cat/kitten you've adopted. I really don't care and am much happier never to hear about it again. Why would I want an update on a kitten I wanted to kill the day it became. Besides, I have a million cats already, the last thing I want to hear about is someone else's cat. Especially don't send me updated photos of it, unless it's dead, because that is the LAST photograph I would ever want to see on the face of this earth. What makes people think I want to see pictures of a cat I've already seen and wanted get rid of. Now, if I wanted to know about the kitten's future or what it'll look like later and how it'll be or whatever I wouldn't give it away. That want would never occur.

Dizzle

SSM (Sesame Street Monster)

Scroll below for pictures and profiles of three currently available kittens (I will have more by june 26)

The unwanted legally, neglected Older outdoor Cats

Unwanted, hated indoor cats

Reasons why owning a cat or any other indoor pet is a stupid idea

to adopt or For more information, e-mail

If you show proof that you really really want it for whatever reason .. then i'll actually potty train it and take it to the vet for its shots and then it'll be a cat free from error and if anything happens to it, then it would be your fault.