Cleariing the Tables to Move On
by zandra
The physical barrier exists.  The bond, nevertheless exists as well. It builds daily, ne hourly.  i feel You even though the distance remains.  It is as though You reach out along another plane and grab me.  It is not a forceful grab but a firm one, one definite and specific.

You enjoy exerting this,  not so subtle, control over me, i know.  You revel in knowing i am possessed with thoughts of You.  These thoughts, they are not ordinary.  They are intense and difficult sometimes.  On the surface they are my thoughts, but no this is not true.  These are the thoughts You have implanted inside of me. This should anger me. But it does not. They are Your liberties to take.  Not mine to refuse or rebuke. In this way i have submitted already. It wasn't my intent, but do i have a choice?  My choices diminish with each moment's time.

i cannot reach out and touch You or see You, but i know the opposite is not true.  Your eyes pierce my being stripping me of the fabric that is i. i am naked before You, defenseless under Your relentless gaze.

i know it makes You grin and for this i rejoice.  If in my humiliation You are pleased then i am of service to You.  This enlivens my soul.
And so, in my minds eye, i kneel in Your presence.  i am stripped not just of my clothing but of every pretense i once owned.  I can see Your likeness staring down upon me, Your eyes burn through me.  i try to divert my eyes, but You will not have it.  You grab me by the hair and pull my head up so that i am looking directly and deeply into Your eyes.  The power in Your eyes ignites my insides. i am filled with intense and deep love for You and a profound gratefulness to You for Your ownership.

The lead You have attached to me allows You to move me at will with no verbal commands needed.  You yank on it, first this way and then that.  It as though You wish to assure Yourself that everything is in order.  When You are satisfied You lead me across the room to a large padded bench.  Soon i am positioned face down legs straddling the side.  It is not long before You have cuffed my ankles and wrists.  My ankles are securely attached to the end of the bench.  My wrists are pulled high above my head and forward where they are attached to the top of the vertical column that anchors the bench.
You remind me that i have discipline owed  me.  Unfinished business, as it were.  When i was confused i should have turned to You.  I should have obeyed You, then.  And if I could not do that, I should have been smart & safe.  It is done, it is over but my punishment remains.  Before We can progress  We must put this behind Us.  You ask me for my agreement before continuing.  While i am unable to speak, my head moves horizontally, expressing my agreement to that which is about to come.

As the first blows begin to land, i feel an almost immediate release.  Before there is any pain i find myself crying uncontrollably.  It is a cleansing.  There is a joy in knowing that i belong to You now and that You will always make sure i do not flounder.   Before long the blows start to slow and become more manageable. 

And then, as if a miracle has arrived, it is over.  i am no longer bound but am in Your loving arms.  You hold me tenderly across Your body.  With one hand You caress my heated backside, the other wipes away my tears.  Your touch is tender and loving.  The soothing energy that is my Master removes the sting and replaces it with the glow of His love and of my desire.
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