weird sex facts-

1. Actual amount of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons (lets bake a cake! who the fuck cares?)

2. Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200 (horny bastards)

Average # of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000 (more like 7,200, heehee)

3. Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons

Average amount of water it takes to fill a bathtub: 35 gallons (you're telling me, guys don't even have the balls to fill a bathtub in a lifetime, heehee)

4. Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour

Average speed of a city bus: 25 miles per hour (Those fuckers need to slow down, they're gonna shoot someone's eye out!)

5. Average # of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7 Average # of calories in a can of Dr. Pepper: 150 (for the sluts on a diet, hey look, how many teaspoons are in Dr pepper though?)

6. Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inches (awww)

7. Average length when erect: 5.1 (Ok, girls stay away from the average ones heehee just kidding!)

8. Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inch (What are they talking about, that's not natural!)

9. Largest natural penis recorded: 11 inches (ouch!)

10. Largest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet (blue whale). Height from court floor to the rim of a basketball hoop: 10 feet (weird that's 12 times a big recorded man's thingy XD)

11. Most arousing time of day/season for a man: early morning in the fall. (you know what would be funny! If girls had morning-ly periods during the fall XD)

12. Best ways to improve sexual function: quit smoking, start exercising, lose weight. (yeah you know why? Cause 500lb smokers who sit around on the couch all day don’t get any)

13. (listen closely guys!) Foods that improve sex life: oysters, lean meat, seafood, whole grains, and wheat germ

14. Percent of men who say they masturbate: 60% (see men are at least 39% liars. )

15. Percent of men who say they masturbate at least once a day: 54% (unless that 46% are old or not-horny *yeah right* they masturbate at least once every two days.)

16. Percent of men who say they feel guilty masturbating that often: 41% (Thanks for being honest boys!)

17. Amount of time needed for a man to regain erection: from 2 min to 2weeks (depending on age or what's getting it up im sure)

18. Average # of erections per day for a man: 11 (must be un-noticeable, or im not looking.)

19. Average # of erections during the night: 9 (O I see what's going on, There's only two around me! just kidding)

20. Distance sperm travels to fertilize an egg: 3-4 inches

The human equivalent: 26 miles (a marathon distance) (No comment)

Time it takes the sperm: 2.5 seconds

Time it takes an average person to complete a marathon: 4 hours (greedy little bastards)

21. Sperm life: 2 1/2 months (from development to ejaculation)

Shelf life of a hostess Twinkie: 7 years (then why do Twinkies taste better?)

22. Cost of a year's supply of condoms: $100 (rich sluts)

23. Thickness of the average condom: .07 mm

24. Thickness of super-thin condoms: .05 mm

25. Thickness of plastic wrap: .0127 mm (That's a relief)

26. number of times condoms are thicker that plastic wrap: almost 6 (If they weren't they wouldn't be protective.)

27-a. In general, the taste of a man's semen varies with his diet. (so pay attention to the below)

27-b. Some say that the alkaline-based foods (fish and some meats) produce a buttery or fishy taste.

27-c. Dairy products can create a foul taste.

The taste of semen after eating asparagus is said to be the foulest.

27-d. ACIDIC FRUITS AND ALCOHOL (EXCEPT PROCESSED LIQUORS) GIVE IT A PLEASANT AND SUGARY TASTE. Examples: oranges, mangos, kiwi, lemons, grapefruit, limes, Labatt Blue, Honey Brown

27-e. Drinking a Corona with lime is double the fun.

28. Odors that increase blood flow to the penis: lavender, licorice, chocolate, doughnuts, pumpkin pie. (Happy Thanksgiving!)

29. (incase you didn't already know) Yes, the penis does shrink in the shower.

30. It is common for men to wake up with "morning wood," a name for an a.m. erection. (sucks to be them!)

31. (Jokers) "Blue balls" or the term a man uses when he says his balls will explode if he doesn't have sex, is totally false. (so there!)