My name is Kristie, I have been a self injurer for a year and a half, it all begins as my parents divorce and so I was sent to a boarding school, life there was great and people there were cool and friendly, and my school work was going on much better than i think. Things seemed to be at my peak, but contrastingly, my emotions inside were going rapidly down hill, I felt like falling apart. Due to the fact that I am quite a perfectionist, academically, I always top my class, but this is not really what I want. All the stress that comes is the main murderer of my soul. People start to think I am geek at school and since I lost my family's emotion support already, it is really heart-breaking to know that the new friends whom you just meet are going to leave you as well. I started binge-eating, I feel so hollow inside and my life seems to be tearing apart. I feel very insecure, and I start playing with the cutter, once I start cutting, I cannot stop...
At the same time, I also bang my hands towards the table corner, that explains all the bruises over my body... to be honest, I actually prefer bruises than cutting itself, though I would not deny that cutting is a better 'healing mechanism' to my soul, but to prevent all the unnecessary worries induced when I am on holidays at home or in the summer when everyone wears sphaghetti tops and everything, it is always convenient to have bruises instead of cuts coz bruises are much more easily explained.
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