i stayed the night at ashley's the other night. she didn't want to have to drive all the way out here to pick me up in the morning. so i got up around 8:30 that morning, we went and picked up cheryl. we were all looking for white (or pastel) dresses for graduation and white shoes. i didn't find anything. so i called off work (i was supposed to work 4-12) and we went to christy's graduation party. it was lots of fun until i read brandyn's livejournal entry. the whole acid thing greatly perturbed me. i sat there for a while, by myself in christy's computer room, trying so hard to hold back the tears. i think a few slipped by me, but then again, i'm always melodramatic... just like bekey. right? the whole acid thing is a direct reminder of last summer, a very, very sad time when brandyn ended up in the psycho ward indirectly because of me. everytime i think of it my insides twist around and pull tight and it gets hard to breathe.

::deep breath::

anyway.. christy's brother's girlfriend bought us some alcohol for my party. so ash and i drove all the way back in the rain, hooray!!! i love rain! but i was pissed because we were going to have a campfire and stuff. so we got here and stuff around 10:30 after stopping at ashley's house. she was freaking out the whole time because we're so far out in the country. so got all paranoid. she wouldn't even go to the bathroom by herself. "it reminds me of a stephen king setting" she said. i couln't help but laugh and accuse her of paranoia. she wanted to leave around 11:30 but was to afraid to leave me home by myself. i assured her i'd be okay for another half hour when everyone was supposed to get here. so she left. everyone showed up on time. lots of fun mind altering substances. it was a great end to a not so great day. why do i let small, stupid shit get to me as much as they do?