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| Dammit Greg, We are going to have a normal fucking Thanksgiving this year. Grandma is flying in from Davenport and I don't need you prancing around the house with your sisters make up smeared all over your face like some kind of faggot. I'm sick and tired of every year having to bust my balls trying to get this family to quit acting like a bunch of retarded oklahomans. We're Bradburry's goddammit, and a Bradburry carries himself with class and dignity. Not bright green shorts with "juicy" written on the ass Becky. Quit acting like a $4 whore. I swear to god, if either one of you misbehavaes this week so help me god I am just going to lose it. I've made a list of Do's and Dont's for everyone to follow so that this Thanksgiving dosen't end up like the last one, with green bean casserole dripping from the walls and 3 people in the hospital. |
| We're going to act like a normal family this year, got it? by: Michael Bradburry Sr. |
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Thanksgiving Rules 1) Makeup Restricted to Females 2) Robby, We all know your gay, Theres no need to make some big announcement during dinner. 3) No physical threats to be made towards any member of the family. Especially Grandma. 4) We eat with silverware, not fingers. 5) Becky, There is a kids table and an adults table, just because your dating a 28 year old college sophomore you still have to sit at the kids table. 6) Let's keep racial slurs to a minimum during dinner. |
| I think if we all agree to follow these rules, we can have a decent family dinner, and when everyone goes home you all can do whatever the hell you want to.... I'll be drifting into the grips of an alcohol induced coma for the next 3-5 days. |