Maybe its me,
maybe I'm the crazy one,
the one who is afraid to love,
the one that will never give her heart and soul.
So many things I want,
ambition was never looked upon as a bad thing,
never degraded to a lower level,
just simple me with my big ideals.
Maybe I'm not meant to love,
maybe my goals are not meant to be accomplished.
Maybe its me,
my distorted views,
my dark beginnings,
my broken visions of black and white reality.
Sure...illusions are my great hobby,
but maybe that's all they are.
Maybe fictional soon to be deceptions,
just like everything else.
Yet, those are the ones that take care of my insane thoughts,
hope that someday i'll be someone.
Yet, repeatedly and recently they all tumble down,
just like an avalanche of pure raw failure.
Maybe I'm not meant to live,
just give an example,
Maybe I don't deserve to have inner peace.
Reasons for my misery?
My active mind, my paranoia,
my need for excellence,
my need for self discovery.
It may all be the deal and hardship of my true self,
Maybe its me,
the one that pushes everyone away,
the one that acts upon her impulses,
just a horrible person,
the one that hurts just about...
everyone she has ever loved.
The one that is never to be taken serious,
the one who is treated like a child.
Maybe I don't deserve to live,
Maybe its just simply me...
Some see great things in me,
yet I see none of the above.
How come I see nothing at all?
......decided yet between the obvious?
Love me?...Hate me?
any difference at all?
I know i make you mad,
but look on the bright side,
I'll just betray,
I'll just push you away,
my nature,
my impulse,
my death sentence.
Maybe i need a statement,
Maybe i need a change.
Ohh, Simple simple Vicky,
There’s nothing you can do,
all you do is try,
and try and try,
even if it kills you,
which in great parts it has.