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| Real Name: Sir Esgeem Penington Mathers IV Height: 5'5" Weight: 169 lbs. Hometown: Summer of Monkey Island, Funorama Trademark Manuevers: "Waffle Iron" - series of powerful kicks, followed by the Swift, Sharp, Clean Kick to the Left Nut "Cardboard Cutter" - flipping neck breaker off top rope Since the age of three, Esgeem has been a professional orator. His clear voice and large vocabulary were impressive even for an adult and made him a nationally recognized prodigy. Unfortunately, just days before a speech to the United Nations to organize a final world wide peace treaty, Esgeem's genetic disorder, which causes an acute 'addiction' to cookies kicked in. Hundreds of cookies a week, coupled with the fact that he can't hold his sugar worth a damn, caused extreme sugar rushes which accounts for his eccentric and sometimes unpredictable behavior. On one occasion, SGM somehow swallowed a crayon that lodged between his vocal cords, causing him to be mute for the rest of his life. He has overcome his 'handicap' by learning how to write signs in over 69 different languages. His amazing caligraphical skills and use of language has earned him several awards and distinctions, such as being Knighted by The TRUMonkeyKing himself, and being given the Barry I. Grahm Social Humanitarianism Intentive Trophy. The BIGSHIT award is the highest honor that can be given to a Funoramian citizen. Later, Mr. TRUMonkeyKing designated Sign Guy Monkey to be his personal communicator. Not so much a wrestler as he is The TRUMK's hype man, SGM has learned a few moves in the ring. He more or less flings his body across the ring and specializes in high-flying maneuvers and suicidal attacks. Other than that he couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag (He's tried before). |