Allah has created
men and women as company for one another, and so that they can procreate and
live in peace and tranquillity according to the commandments of Allah and the
directions of His Messenger. The Qur'an says:
And among His
signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you
may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your
hearts. Undoubtedly in these are signs for those who reflect. (30:21)
And Allah has made
for you your mates of your own nature, and made for you, out of them, sons and
daughters and grandchildren, and provided for you sustenance of the best.
(16:72)
These verses of
the Noble Qur'an clearly show that in contrast to other religions like Christianity,
Buddhism, Judaism etc. which consider celibacy or monasticism as a great virtue
and a means of salvation, Islam considers marriage as one of the most virtuous
and approved institutions. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) declared,
"There is no monasticism in Islam." He further ordained,
"O you young
men! Whoever is able to marry should marry, for that will help him to lower his
gaze and guard his modesty." (Al-Bukhari)
Modesty was
regarded as a great virtue by the Prophet. He said, "Modesty is part of
faith." (Al-Bukhari)
The importance of the institution
or marriage receives its greatest emphasis from the following hadith of the
Prophet,
"Marriage is
my sunna. Whosoever keeps away from it is not from me."
With these
Qur'anic injunctions and the guidance from the Prophet (peace be upon him) in
mind, we shall examine the institution of marriage in the Shari'ah.
The word zawaj is used in
the Qur'an to signify a pair or a mate. But in common parlance it stands for
marriage. Since the family is the nucleus of Islamic society, and marriage is
the only way to bring families into existence, the Prophet (peace be upon him)
insisted upon his followers entering into marriage The Shari'ah prescribes
rules to regulate the functioning of the family so that both spouses can live
together in love, security, and tranquillity. Marriage in Islam has aspects of
both 'ibadah (worship) of Allah and mu'amalah (transactions between human
beings).
In its 'ibadah aspect, marriage
is an act pleasing to Allah because it is in accordance with his
commandments that husband and wife love each other and help each other to make
efforts to continue the human race and rear and nurse their children to become
true servants of Allah.
In its mu'amalah aspect, marriage
being a lawful response to the basic biological instinct to have sexual
intercourse and to procreate children, the Shari'ah has prescribed detailed
rules for translating this response into a living human institution reinforced
by a whole framework of legally enforceable rights and duties, not only of the
spouses, but also of their offspring.
These aspects are beautifully
explained in a tradition of the Prophet. It is narrated by Anas that the
Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said,
"When a man
marries, he has fulfilled half of his religion, so let him fear Allah regarding
the remaining half."
The Prophet
considered marriage for a Muslim as half of his religion because it shields him
from promiscuity, adultery, fornication, homosexuality etc., which ultimately
lead to many other evils like slander, quarreling, homicide, loss of property
and disintegration of the family. According to the Prophet (peace be upon him)
the remaining half of the faith can be saved by taqwa.
Careful consideration of the
Qur'anic injunctions and the traditions of the Prophet (peace be upon him)
clearly show that marriage is compulsory (wajib) for a man who has the means to
easily pay the mahr (dowry) and to support a wife and children, and is healthy,
and fears that if does not marry, he may be tempted to commit fornication
(zina). It is also compulsory for a woman who has no other means of maintaining
herself and who fears that her sexual urge may push her into fornication.
In a beautiful tradition the
Prophet (peace be upon him) has given the most important point that should
weigh with every Muslim in selecting his bride:
"Whoever
marries a woman solely for her power and position, Allah will only increase him
in humiliation. Whoever marries a woman solely for her wealth, Allah will only
increase him in poverty. Whoever marries a woman because of her beauty, Allah
will only increase him in ugliness. But whoever marries a woman in order that
he may restrain his eyes, observe cautiousness, and treat his relations kindly,
Allah puts a blessing in her for him and in him for her."
In order that
problems should not arise after marriage the Prophet (peace be upon him)
recommended that, in the selection of his bride, a man should see her before
betrothal lest blindness of choice or an error of judgment should defeat the
very purpose of marriage. But this "seeing" is not to be taken as a
substitute for the "courtship" of the West. The man should not gaze
passionately at his bride-to-be, but only have a critical look at her face and
hands to acquaint himself with her personality and beauty. However, if a man so
desires, he may appoint a woman to go and interview the proposed bride, so that
she may fully describe the type of girl she is.
Since believing men and women are
referred to in the Qur'an, a woman also has the right to look at her potential
husband.
The special permission for men and
women to see each other with a view to matrimony does not contravene the code
of conduct for believing men and women to lower their gaze and be modest which
is laid down in the Holy Qur'an.
The consent of
both the man and the women is an essential element of marriage, and the Qur'an
gives women a substantial role in choosing their own life partners. It lays
down:
Do not prevent
them from marrying their husbands when they agree between themselves in a
lawful manner. (2: 232)
It may sometimes happen that in
her immaturity or over-zealousness, a girl may want to marry a man about whom
she has distorted information or who does not possess good character or who
lacks proper means of livelihood. In such a case, it is better, or rather
incumbent upon the girl's father or guardian, that, in the wider interests of
the girl, he restrains her from marrying such a worthless man and finds a
suitable person to be her husband. Generally speaking, such marriages arranged
by fathers and guardians work better than a marriage brought about through
western courtship.
The case of Abu Juham bin
Hudhaifah and Mu'awiyah ibn Abu Sufyan is relevant here. They proposed marriage
to Fatimah bint Ghaith. The Prophet (peace be upon him) advised Fatimah not to
marry either of them on the grounds that Mu'awiyah was then a pauper and Abu
Juham was cruel and harsh. So she married Usamah.
The Qur'an (
"The widow
and the divorced woman shall not be married until their order is obtained, and
the virgin shall not be married until her consent is obtained."
(AlBukhari)
This aspect is
greatly emphasized by Imam Bukhari. He, in fact, gave one of the chapters in
his Sahih the significant title:
"When a man
gives his daughter in marriage and she dislikes it, the marriage shall be
annulled." Once a virgin girl came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and
said that her father had married her to a man against her wishes. The Prophet
gave her the right to repudiate the marriage. (Abu Dawud).
Divorced women are
also given freedom to contract a second marriage. The Holy Qur'an says,
And when you
divorce women, and they have come to the end of their waiting period, hinder
them not from marrying other men if they have agreed with each other in a fair
manner. (2: 232)
With regard to
widows, the Qur'an says,
And if any of you
die and leave behind wives, they bequeath thereby to their widows (the right
to) one year's maintenance without their being obliged to leave (their
husband's home), but if they leave (the residence) of their own accord, there
is no blame on you for what they do with themselves in a lawful manner. (2:234)
Thus widows are
also at liberty to re-marry, even within the period mentioned above; and if
they do so they must forgo their claim to traditional maintenance during the
remainder of the year. However, it must be remembered that the power of ijbar
given to the a father or the guardian by the Maliki school over their selection
of life- partner obtains in all the situations considered above, namely,
whether the daughter or the ward is a virgin or divorcee or widow.
Under the
Shari'ah, marriages between men and women standing in a certain relationship to
one another are prohibited. These prohibited degrees are either of a permanent
nature or a temporary. The permanently prohibited degrees of marriage are laid
down in the Holy Qur'an :
And marry not
those women whom your fathers married, except what has already happened (of
that nature) in the past. Lo! it was ever lewdness and abomination, and an evil
way. Forbidden unto you are your mothers and your daughters, and your sisters
and your father's sisters and your mother's sisters, and your brother's
daughters and your sister's daughters, and your foster-mothers and your foster-sisters,
and your mothers-in-law and your step-daughters who are under your
mother-in-law and your step-daughters who are under your protection (born) of
your women unto whom you have gone into -- but if you have not gone into them,
then it is no sin for you (to marry their daughters) -- and the wives of your
sons from your own loins, and that you should have two sisters together, except
what has already happened (of that nature) in the past. Allah is
ever-Forgiving, Merciful. (
From the above
verses, it is clear that a Muslim must never marry the following:
A great wisdom
lies behind these prohibitions on the grounds of consanguinity, affinity, and fosterage.
No social cohesion can exist if people do not keep these prohibitions in their
minds while contracting marriages.
Temporary prohibitions are those
which arise only on account of certain special circumstances in which the
parties are placed. If the circumstances change, the prohibition also
disappears. They are as follows:
Regarding this
last prohibition, the Qur'an expects Muslims to act with the utmost propriety
and righteousness. It lays down:
...but do not make
a secret contract with them except in honourable terms, nor resolve on the tie
of marriage till the term prescribed is fulfilled. (2:235)
This means that a
man must not make a specific proposal of marriage to a woman during the time of
her 'iddah after the death of her husband or an irrevocable divorce. However,
he can send a message saying, for instance, "I wish to find a woman of
good character". But if a woman is in the 'iddah of a divorce which is
revocable where raja' (return) is possible, a man must not send her even an
implied invitation to marry him, because she is still considered as the lawful
wife of the first husband. In fact, this restriction is most beneficial because
it prevents a man from becoming an instrument of breaking up a family where
there are still chances of reconciliation between the wife and husband even
though they are moving away from each other.
The Prophet (peace
be upon him) disapproved of two persons competing with one another to secure
marriage with the same girl. This is because such a situation is likely to
develop bitter enmity between two Muslim brothers.
The Prophet said,
"A believer
is a brother of a believer. Hence it is not lawful for him to bargain upon the
bargain of a brother, nor propose for (the hand of a girl) after the marriage
proposal of his brother, until the latter (voluntarily) withdraws the
proposal."