Grandma

When I think of Grandma I think of red, the color of fire and passion. She embodied it. She was like a firey teenager that never lost her spunk. She never lost her hot Spanish conquistador's temper either. She never forgave anyone. Grandma and I had a very special connection. We had a pyschic bond. She knew when I went into the hospital. She told me of how her brothers ghost visited her the night he died. She had the statue of the Virgin mary on her fireplace mantle and a picture of the sacred heart of Jesus on her mirror. She traveled alot and went to spain where she got me a rosary made of crushed rose petals from a Spanish monestary.

She hated the Japanese. We were never allowed to speak of them because they beheaded her sister in World War II.

She couldn't stand little boys. The boy grandkids were shafted in her book. I was one of 3 girl grandkids and I was the eldest and most favored.

Grandma did all kinds of things she wasn't supposed to. She gave me a bottle well past the age and as a result my parents to this day blame her for my thumbsucking problem. I don't see it as a problem, it's a comfort thing... oh well she got in trouble for it.

She also took me to movies she wasn't supposed to like All That Jazz, an R rated movie. My first horror movie, The House, a scary movie which she thought was hysterical and scared the crap out of me. She would also go to the matinee' and go from movie to movie without paying for the other movies. She also had a lead foot on the highway and do 80 in a 55 and think it was funny. She cused in 2 foreign lanuages, spanish & tagallian the Philipino language. Her wrath was fierce and she was always concerned with money...only about spending it and to whom her things would go after she died. She constantly threatened leaving someone out of her will.

I loved her unconditionaly. But her legacy of hate died with her. I refuse to carry on the family tradition of holding grudges, loving one and not another, and bigotry. Because of her I choose NOT to begrudge anyone. It ate my grandfather alive, she lost her sanity because of it. I will not die like either of them. The Spanish temper my be in my blood, but I refuse to carry on a family tradition of stupidity through passing on hate.