| Jesse Jackson got out of the shower and was drying off when he noticed a white band from just above his eyes to the top of his head. Fearing he was turning white, he called his doctor and told him of his problem. The doctor advised him to come to his office immediately. After an examination, the doctor mixed a concoction of brown liquid, gave it to Jesse, and told him to drink it all. Jesse did and replied that it tasted like shit. The doctor replied, "It was Jesse. You were a quart low." |
| Jesse Jackson was talking to God one day. "How are you doing Jesse?" God asked. "Pretty good God. I have a question for you though." Jesse replied. "What's that Jesse?" God asked. "When is there ever going to be a black president?" Jesse asked. "Not in your lifetime Jesse." God replied. "Well that's too bad. When is there ever going to be a woman president God?" Jesse asked. God laughed and said, "Not in my lifetime." |
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| Why were Mike Tyson's eyes red after sex? Mace. |
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| How do you know it's bedtime at Michael Jackson's Mansion? When the big hand touches the little hand. |