The Joy of Driving
by IamBoris

I left the house on time
for once and for a moment
deluded myself into thinking
today would be different.

I made it as far as the stop sign,

where I waited
for the silver-grey sedan to pass.
It turned into a driveway
a quarter-block away.

Apparently, no blinker was needed.

So I made my turn,
having waited for nothing,
and prepared for the next assault
on my sanity.

It didn�t take long

before I found myself
behind a colossal green 4x4
with no brake lights but a definite need
to brake every ten seconds.

My descent into madness began.

I cursed and I yelled, not at him,
of course, but about him,
and yet he remained in existence.
My brilliant plan had somehow failed.

Then the wild turkey showed up

and decided to cross the freeway,
nearly causing a three-car pile-up
in the process.  I was, of course,
the third car, the poor shmuck

stuck behind the green 4x4 with no brake lights.

I ranted and raved and turned up the radio,
prompting another rant about that,
about the absurdity of the cell-phone ad
and the offense I�d taken at the

pandering, exploitative �Buy for America� campaign.

And I watched speeders fly by me
as I got trapped behind a semi-truck
that cut me off to travel 35 in a 55,
leaving me no recourse but to

give them the one-finger highway salute.

And I seethed and I shouted,
which did surprisingly little
to rectify the situation,
though it did prevent me
from sucker-punching the first person
I met upon arriving
in the overly-crowded campus lot
ten minutes late!

Do you think I have anger issues?
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