| Kevin closed the sliding door silently behind him heaving a huge sigh of relief as he left the sounds of the party behind him and escaped into the darkness. Lately everything about his life felt cloying and irritating to him and he had found himself imbued with a deep sense of aimlessness, which almost bordered on depression. He wandered down the deck�s stairs and felt his feet sink in the white pristine snow that covered the back garden, with every footstep he took it crunched and crackled under his feet. The winter air was crisp and frigid, so biting upon his face that he could feel his skin tingling painfully as the cold night air surrounded him. Kevin gathered his coat closer about him, tucking up his collar, not only for protection from the weather but as a shield against his despondent mood, a case of shutting the world out. However, when he breathed out, the cold air frosted into mist that he could almost imagine forming icicles upon his goatee. He gave a grunt of impatience at this fanciful thought and he shivered with goose bumps running up his spine, thinking with frustration that now was not the time to indulge in flights of a whimsical nature. �Icicles on my goatee indeed!� Kevin wished he could shake off this mood of despondency he thought sourly, for tonight, the past never seemed far away, and his regrets, well, they also seemed to dominate his thoughts. Regrets that of late had turned his thoughts to the past and of times when life seemed less complicated and easier. Kevin had been feeling very restless and unsettled of late, and in seeking to escape, he had thrown himself into a frenetic round of partying and socialising with his celebrity circle of friends to try to lose the building sense of agitation and loneliness that was welling deep within. A shooting star that flared across the velvety blackness caught his attention, dragging his thoughts away from his melancholy. How that starburst shot so freely across the heavens and he found himself being stirred by the beauty of the vastness of space. What brought the next sudden thought to mind he would never know? Maybe it was the freedom of that stars flight across the night�s darkness. �Harriet!� His childhood sweetheart came unbidden to his thoughts. The girl he would have married if fame, fortune and the desire to follow his dreams had not beckoned and he not heeded its call, despite the pull of his heart in the other direction, towards a future with Harriet. It had been so long ago when they parted, he with promises to keep in touch, and Harriet bravely holding back her tears, sending him off to follow his dream, but he was too full of himself, and if he was honest, so very willing to deny the truth that lay deep within her pale green eyes. Denial was a balm for painful memories, he had often chosen not to look back to the past and the girl of his youth that he had left behind, so maybe it was not so strange that he thought of her now, at a time when the past seemed so close to his heart. Looking back it had dawned on him that Harriet knew he would not return, not to her, whether he succeeded or failed in seeking his dream, for their time has passed and deep down Harriet had realised that and so let him go. As the years past, Kevin had come to the slow realisation of the fact that Harriet had loved him enough to let go, that her unselfishness was a gift, which he doubted whether in her position he could have been so self sacrificing, but Harrie in some ways had seemed wise beyond her years. �How ironic.� Kevin thought with a sigh at these bitter sweet memories, that despite his lifestyle and for all his fame, tonight when an intense feeling of loneliness threatened to overwhelm him, he would think of the one person who was as far away as that shooting star, she may as well be in another galaxy. Raising his head, again his eyes restlessly scanned the midnight sky; a shimmery silvery moon flitted teasingly through the thin tendrils of cloud that glided silently across the night sky, now and then obscuring the bright shimmering stars that twinkled and danced like Christmas lights upon a tree. It all looked so welcoming, almost as if he could reach up and touch them. � Stars looking like Christmas lights! Now you are being fanciful Kevin Richardson.� He whispered ruefully admonishing himself. �You�ve had way to much to drink tonight as usual.� He irritably glanced back towards the house where the Christmas Eve party was in full swing and he sighed. The night air was full of muted party noise as it wafted out from the house and Kevin remembered why he had fled. Even among a crowd, one could be lonely, even among friends and family tonight, he was so very aware of the emptiness of his life. His career had brought him fame, fortune and countless privileges but over these last few months, he had been painfully aware that something was dreadfully lacking in his life. For all his fame and fortune, he was missing in his life that which he had learned to valued most, someone he loved to share it all with, or just someone to share his life. For he had discovered the other side of fame and fortune, beneath the gloss and glitter was often false gold. A fakeness with which he was rapidly becoming disillusioned with, and he did not like that he was becoming a bitter cynical man. It was ironical that Harriet had spontaneously popped into his mind; he wondered what had become of her after he left Kentucky. Was she married, did she have children, was she a career driven woman? Where was the girl of his youth that he gave his heart to? In the distance, he heard a door open and someone call his name. It was his cousin Brian and not wanting to be a killjoy and let his despondent mood put a damper on the party his cousin was hosting, he took a step back into a tree�s shadow and ignored the repeated calls of his name until Brian gave up and closed the door, again shutting away the sounds of the party. Dolefully Kevin leant back against the tree and despondently studied the heavens again. The dark night sky was full of coloured lights now, so amazingly beautiful that they stirred his soul, for once, he felt strangely alive and invigorated and he felt himself drawn towards them. The Aurora Borealis, which glowed with dancing swirls of mystic illumination that were enigmatic, eerie, their awe-inspiring colours and beauty was so inspiring and he found himself unable to look away. Unexpectedly amongst the swirling colours a brightness emerged from its centre, it hurt his eyes to watch, so Kevin flung up an arm to shield his gaze from its intensity but unable to turn away from it�s luminous beauty. Against his will he found himself drawn towards the brightness, his feet moving in slow heavy lumbering steps through the snow as he fought against the strange light�s power. A blinding flash encompassed his body, a sharp burst of pain where he thought his body would surely explode as the rush of blood coursed through his veins, compounded by such a roaring like a raging ocean in his ears. It was followed by a period of blessed numbness as the darkness took hold and silence prevailed and he knew no more as unconsciousness claimed his mind and all around him was still and silent. ****************************** �Wake up Daddy, wake up. Mummy says we�re going to be late.� The incessant pleas and a sensation of someone tugging at his shoulder finally permeated his dreamlike state of sleep. �DADDY?� his mind questioned as he sleepily rolled over shrugging off the grasping hand that sort to disturb his slumber, he snuggled deeper under the quilt and sort to shut the noise out of his mind. �MUMMY! Daddy won�t wake up.� A small whiney voice called to the unseen person called mummy. Again, he felt the tugging sensation at his shoulder then a blast of cold air covered his body as the quilt was ripped from his body. �Get up Kevin. You are going to make me late. It�s your turn to do the school run this morning.� A harassed sounding voice snapped at him as his hand fumbled about for the coverlet and it was obviously the voice, which had cruelly ripped the comforting quilt from his body. Kevin warily opened one eye as he tried to shake the fog of sleep from his befuddled brain and make sense of the situation. �Daddy? Mummy? School run? What the ���?� A flying missile launched itself upon the bed and Kevin felt himself gasp as a pair of knees winded him in the stomach. That made him see stars; his eyes flew open in shock as he found himself straddled by a child of about seven who was riding him like a horse emitting out gleeful sounds of delight that screamed in his barely awake brain. Struggling for breath and floundering to sit up, Kevin felt the weight removed suddenly as the child was yanked from the bed by the owner of that extremely irritated voice. �Scott Jerald Richardson, leave your father alone and go get your things ready for school, Kevin please get up, I don�t know why we have to go through this every morning. You are just the worst person to wake up. Scotty� that�s your brother calling me now, can you go see what Liam wants please?� Amidst the child�s grumbling, the voice was all Kevin could hear in the red misty fog of his mind as he fought to regain his wind but it was a strangely familiar voice nonetheless. Rubbing his eyes, Kevin found himself sitting up in the bed. He was very confused now, what happened to his bedroom, his designer furniture, his carefully planned minimalist d�cor? Where on earth was he? The kid was climbing back on the bed again. �Scotty go see to Liam for me� and stop annoying your father� go get.� Kevin caught a flash of blonde hair as the woman who owned the voice patted the child�s backside playfully before following the child and leaving the room. Kevin wide-awake now warily took stock of his surroundings, this was definitely not a room he recognised. �I�m going mad.� He thought, rubbing his eyes in disbelief as the hectic sounds of family life wafted up from downstairs to the strange bedroom. A baby started crying, not the older child that called out for it�s mother earlier, but definitely an infant and Kevin was beginning to think he was losing the plot. �Ok I�m in a nightmare and I�m not really awake.� He pinched his arm and let out a yelp. �Ok I felt that. Ok���.. I�m in a dream and I can really feel that I�ve pinched myself. Weird�� definitely weird.� He pondered his predicament. � Maybe I drank too much red wine at Brian�s party and I�m hallucinating. Yes that�s it I�m hallucinating.� A voice from downstairs shattered his musing. �For god�s sake Kev�GET UP! What�s up with you this morning? Scotty please give Liam his truck back and both of you eat your breakfast quietly while I feed Annie. Kevin please�� I�ve only one pair of hands and your kids are making full use of that one pair. No Liam� the truck does not want to swim in your cheerio's������ Kevin against his will and better judgement climbed out of bed but was brought up short as he caught sight of his appearance in the mirror. His hair was longer than his normal short spiky cut and he was clean-shaven. His sleep attire was not his usual designer silken boxer shorts but plain cotton underpants, with a large gaping hole in the top near the elastic. Momentarily stunned by his appearance, for he would never be caught dead in holey underwear, he hastily looked about the room for something to cover up with and catching sight of a towelling robe thrown carelessly over a chair he snatched it up and shrugged himself into it. Then he left the bedroom to go search for the source of that achingly familiar voice and the commotion that had woken him into this nightmarish world. Finding his way gingerly down an unaccustomed stairway and using his instincts to guide him towards the kitchen from where he guessed was the source of this weird nightmarish existence he found himself in, he carefully poked his head around the doorway into the kitchen and confronted the situation that was awaiting him. �Finally�. God Kev, I�m going to be so late. Here take Annie, her diaper needs changing, but she�s been fed. Her bag�s packed and ready for you to drop her off at the cr�che after you�ve done the school run. Make sure Scott and Liam brush their teeth before you take them to school.� Her head turned quickly around to her middle child. � Liam I�ve told you that your truck does not want to swim in your cheerio's.� A tall, very pretty, short blonde haired woman with dancing pale green eyes but wearing a harassed expression handed over the baby who would have been just over twelve months old. Kevin gaped opened mouthed in shock as he clutched at the squirming infant to his chest. The two boys at the breakfast table looked up at him with highly amused grins on their faces, the child called Liam gleefully distracted for the moment having stopped dipping his toy truck into the milk and cereal in front of him. The other child, obviously Scott, or Scotty as he seemed to be affectionately called was sniggering openly while the baby was tugging contentedly on his hair and gurgling contentedly. The woman turned from chastising Liam to take note of what was amusing her children so much. �Oh god Kev.� She broke into unrestrained laughter. She leaned in and kissed his cheek lightly but affectionately. �Wearing my dressing gown is not going to make up for you refusing to get out of bed and making me late, besides yellow is not your colour.� �Harrie?� Kevin finally but bewilderingly managed to utter, his face a picture of confusion and bafflement. �Harrie is that really you?� Harriet busy collecting her handbag, car keys and coat looked up in surprise and glanced about her person with a smile. �Well babe, last time I looked it was me.� She quickly scanned herself again. �Yep it�s me, who�d you think it was, Nicole Kidman?� She gave a deep throaty laugh and tucked her blonde hair behind her ears. �Yeah like Nicole has to go through this every morning.� Harriet collected her belongings, picked up a briefcase from beside the door and with a smile lovingly pecked Kevin a goodbye kiss on the cheek, then kissed the baby in his arms. �Have a good day honey, oh and don�t forget to pick up the dry cleaning on your way home.� She ruffled the boy�s hair while dropping kisses on each of their heads. A chorus of �Bye Mummy.� Followed her rushed departure that left Kevin standing awkwardly gazing at her retreating back. He listened helplessly as a car reversed out of the driveway but the baby squirming in his arms brought his attention back to the present. The two boys were watching him with interest over their empty breakfast bowls and the wreckage of the table that was covered with milk and cereal splashes. Liam�s truck for the moment forgotten as the boys gazed at their father who was staring rather hopelessly back at them. �Dad is everything ok?� young Scott asked. � Ummm and don�t you think you should get dressed?� Kevin nodded helplessly as he raised the baby that was supposedly his daughter onto his shoulder in a more comfortable position. He felt her wet diaper and groaned. �Arh,�.. yeah I have to get dressed �� Ok Scotty��� He looked about the kitchen hesitantly but found no help. �Umm�. I�ve just got to change� Annie� yeah Annie that�s her name isn�t it? Umm�. Well you fellas get ready for school,�.. so go clean your teeth like your mummy said. I�ll be with you in a minute.� He turned around and looked about hopelessly, running a hand through his unfamiliar long hair. �Where on earth is the baby�s room?� Kevin thought in a moment of panic. �Dad, you sure you�re ok?� Scotty asked as he came to stand beside Kevin and tugged at Harriet�s dressing gown, he was regarding his father with a strange look in his eyes. �Erh� yeah� yeah I think so�� he studied what he supposed was his oldest son, a smaller version of himself, much as he recalled he looked like at that age and he found himself smiling down at the boy and ruffling his hair. Kevin looked across at Liam who was still seated at the table, a mixture of both Harriet and himself, but it was Harrie�s pale green eyes that examined him watchfully from Liam�s face as the child�s little podgy hand clutched at the truck that had been though a milk wash and caused Harriet no end of trouble this morning. He found himself inclining his head towards the kitchen door. �Come on kiddo, go get ready, I�ve got to see to Annie.� Liam clambered off his chair and followed his older brother out of the kitchen. Kevin with a sense of a discommoded out of body experience followed the boys upstairs was still not quite sure if he was awake or dreaming. However, the little hand that tugged playfully at his hair was so scarily real and so was the spot on his face where Harriet had kissed him goodbye, for his skin still burned where her lips had touched his cheek. |