This is another Non-Christian male-based post. Please disregard it if you are female. This is also an adult website, it has inappropriate material for young ones, so if you are below the age of 12, please tell your mummy/daddy/caretaker to read this.
The theme in this post will be my views on MALE masturbation. Yes , the art of: "tossing the salad dressing, hitting the pole, jacking off, tossing, Yankee doodling, sexual self relieving, letting go, taking a load off, and wanking. One may ponder, what kind of views could there be on such a sensitive topic? Well, devout readers, I think there is an ironic meaning behind the whole concept of masturbation.
Let's just go straight to the point shall we? You are a mass murderer if you have ever masturbated. Let's have a logical think about it. You just finished "hitting the pole", and you wipe the "tadpoles" with tissue, nothing wrong right? WRONG. Tadpoles are living things too, you summoned them out with your "fists of fury" and you leave millions, wait, BILLIONS of them dying in your tissue. What did they die for? They were made to fertilise the woman ovary, but instead they fertilised the facial/toilet tissue. SHAME ON YOU TOSSERS.
You see, masturbation is like Christianity. Many Christians told me they don't "jack off", but it's hard to believe. Even if they do not "Yankee Doodle", they have wet dreams, which also release "tadpoles". If they deny to both, they are defying all biological needs and lying like a footpath. You see, Christians live their life to the way of their god so that they can enter the pearly gates and serve their master from up above. When they die, they follow the radiant "light" and go upwards to heaven.
Confused? Need more emphasis? Oh fine, I'm saying that there's a great similarity between to the "tadpoles"& Christians. The sperm gets summoned upwards and dies in hope they have achieved their mission in their brief life. Humans die in hopes that they achieved their life mission and can go upwards, but will find out they cannot and die in vain. I haven't died yet, so don't ask me for proof. But the whole idea of Heaven is made of human greed is what I believe. So what's so good about Heaven again? I get to play chess with GOD? When I die, I want to disappear from the Earth; I don't want to serve someone forever. Remember, Christianity is also a Middle Eastern - based religion , so don't go criticizing their culture.
As an end note : "Go easy on the penises!"
