Adoption is a legal process whereby the rights and duties of parenting are transferred from a child’s biological parent and/or guardian to that of a new legal guardian. In early cases a new birth certificate is issued and the biological parents have no further contact with the child. However some states require what is known as the “right-to-know,” a law that ensures the biological parent(s) have visitation rights as set forth by the adoption agreement. (Kendall, 2006)

The purpose of this paper is to examine how adoption can negatively affect the development of children. Specifically I will be using my own personal experiences to examine what stages of development are affected, the relationships between the families involved, and finally is there a possibility for resocialization after adolescence.

According to Jean Piaget, there are four stages that all children progress through as they develop into adults. Other than a few basic reflexes, children are brought into the world with nothing. They rely on others, respectively their parents, as their only means of surviving in this complex existence. In what has been considered the most important stage by many sociologists, the sensorimotor stage is where development begins for the newborn. It is at this critical time that imprinting plays an important role in development. The newborn acts as a sponge absorbing everything that is taking place around them: lights, sounds, voices, and physical interaction with mother/father. Unfortunately, this imprinting also works if there is no interaction with the child, adversely affecting social development in the youth. The reason for adoption is some times linked to the biological parent’s inability to support themselves and their child. Although adoption is sought to help the child and parent in the long term, often times the damage from neglect plays a significant role in the child’s long term development, even with the new, potentially, stable environment. If development is hindered at this delicate stage it could spell disaster for several years after the adoption. In the case that I experienced myself, no father and a drug addicted mother did little to help me develop socially. As time continued to pass I fell further and further behind in my social upbringing and thusly delayed the other three important stages in Piaget’s theory. Even after the adoption, problems with my development were just beginning. The family I was adopted into had no idea what type of life I had lived up till that point, and they were very confused about how to go about raising me. Behavioral problems that can be linked directly to neglect soon disrupted the family I had entered and problems escaladed as psychologists and therapists were unable to help control the situation. As a direct result of the neglect in early years of my life, I was unsuited to take on the world and my life certainly reflected this well into my adolescent years.

Another important aspect that too became part of my own life situation was relations between families. As the Nebraska Children’s Home Society points out, raising an adopted child is much different than that of a biological, and says that open adoptions include a continued contact between both sets of family. After being adopted, my mother left my life with no contact for several years. I clearly remember the night when my newly adopted aunt brought me to a parking lot and told me she had a surprise. Very much to my surprise, she had come in contact with my biological mother who at the time wanted to be back in my life. Awaking the next day I was told that I should not tell my adopted family about this meeting. Some time after this event, my biological mother personally made contact with my adopted family and expressed her desire to have me back. Due to the problems I had caused in this new family, the family was almost eager to give me back. For the next several years, I transitioned between spending a few months with my mother and the remaining time with the adopted family. Thoroughly confused about my position in the world, I decided several times that I preferred being with my adopted family rather than my biological mother. Eventually my mother relocated her life to another distant state and for a period of time, she was absent from my life again. In school I was brilliant and made A’s and B’s, yet my behavior was still considered disruptive and a serious problem. According to Susan Golombok two major factors may have been the source of these behavioral distresses. In her article she states that lesbian mothers raising a child have reportedly been bullied by peers and would consequently develop psychological problems, and they would show atypical gender development such that boys would be less masculine in their identity and behavior, and girls less feminine, than those from heterosexual families (Golombok, 2005). With my biological mother well out of my mind, I awoke one day to discover that I was late for school. Confused about why I did not get awakened, I confronted my adopted father who informed me that my mother was coming to take me away again. I spent the next 5 years with her in a new state and continued to have a very rough childhood brought on by continued mental abuse and neglect., until I was again given back to my adopted family. This example of family relations is a bit extreme, but it accurately displays how negative relations can further disrupt social development. Furthermore, it causes confusion within the child when they are unable to find security in their parent figures.

With things looking their worse, one begins to wonder if rehabilitation and resocialization are even possible for an individual who has experienced these traumatic events. Fortunately, through the help of experts and by becoming a psychologist myself, many of the problems that I faced as a youth were able to be corrected. Upon maturation I eventually became aware of the disruptive behaviors that were causing severe problems in my life, and I was able to deal with my personal issues day by day. Yet despite all the corrections I make daily, there are still many areas of social development that I am challenged by. Because I did not experience things at a younger age, I am usually confused as to how to interact with people. It is increasingly difficult to associate with people because I feel an overpowering sense of being different. Rejection is always a struggle to deal with. Each new situation is a constant reminder of past relations where things did not turn out positively.

Feldman, Robert S. 2005. Development Across the Life Span. Pearson Prentice Hall. Upper Saddle River, New Jersey.

Golombok, Susan. Adoption by lesbian couples General Medical Journal. 2002. 31 July 2005. <http://bmj.bmjjournals.com/cgi/content/full/324/7351/1407>.

Kendall, Diana. 2006. Sociology In Our Times: The Essentials. Thomson Wadsworth. Belmont California.

Nebraska Children’s Home Society. 2005. 31 July 2005. <http://adoption.nchs.org/adoptionprocess/QandA/index.asp>.