Bob Dylans Gloves were stolen in China Dylan was walking down the Great Wall, it was cold that day so he had on his favorite pair of gloves A young boy came up behind him and said Mistah Mistah Can I you play yo Gitah Bob Dylan smiled and said sure kid, by the time he had opened up his guitar case he noticed his hands were bare
and the kid was gone he saw him running down the Great Wall and leaving into the tourist shopping area Bob Dylan followed the kid the Kid was gone when he got down to the shopping area he heard a voice say "Hey Mistah need gloves?" he turned and at one of the markets counters a Small Man with a long beard had his gloves lying on the table Dylan said, Those are my gloves...the Small man said, Oh no Mistah you Godda Pay Fo These Dylan said "Listen man dont F_ck around with me just give me my gloves" The Small Man said "Hey you no use bad language around my grand son F_cka..." The Grandson as Dylan noticed was the boy who stole his gloves Dylan says "Listen you Little Sh_ts give me my God damn Gloves or im calling the police" The little boy said "Do it Mistah F_cka" A few minutes later when the police arrive The police officer asks Dylan what happened Dylan tells them the whole story
The Officer looks at the gloves and says "Ah these yo gloves" and Dylan Says "Yes I just told you, they stole then"
The Officer begins speaking in chinese to the Small man and the Boy The Officer Screams at the Small man saying that those are Bob Dylans gloves and he is famouse The Officer pays the small man and buys the gloves
he looks at Dylan and says "Ah these yo gloves?" and Dylan says, Yes and thank you so much officer I really appreciate you buying them for me Ill pay you back...The Last thing Dylan Saw was the Chinese Soldier smile and a loud Thud Noise as everything went black Dylans eyes open slighty in a large room with Red carpet and wallpaper
as Dylan gets up slowly he see's a chubby man sitting across a long dining room table which in the middle has a ping pong net It is none other than Mao Mao Says "Dont be Startled Mistah Dylan, We use this Table for our National Ping Pong Competitions as well as for Dinner for our Very important guests such as yourself..."
Mao then Claps to tell the servants to bring out the food, when he claps Dylan see's his gloves on Mao's hands
Mao says "I've always wanted to meet you Mistah Dylan, your Music Inspires me immensly"
Mao says "And the Peoples Republic of China thanks you for Donating your Gloves"
Dylan says, "Respectfully, sir, I didn't Donate those gloves, I can give you another pair but those are very special to me " Suddenly Mao Gets up and Screams "NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Dylan is shocked for a moment the scream echos through the corridors Guards suddenly pick Dylan up and Drag him to the Table and Sit him down Mao says "Enjoy your Dinner Mistah Dylan, and read your agreement carefully" Servants bring Dylan a paper...On it the agreement reads that Dylan has to commision 700 Songs about the Glory of China and Mao as well as Communism, before Mao will consider giving his gloves back" Dylan Says "This is Bullsh_t man!" Mao says "Oh you don't like the food? Well this is all the food your getting until you finish your songs for us, Enjoy your stay in China Mistah Dylan" Mao Walks out and Claps twice and the Lights and Doors shut on Dylan...Locked in the Dark with only the sound of a large clock For Hours Dylan sat, Hours soon turned to days Dylan gave up shouting The Food on the Table began to rot So Dylan sat down on the carpet and with a bone from his Chicken dinner he began to carve in the first of the 700 songs
David says:they gave him no paper?
Abrahim Esker says: Nope because they are cruel�12 months passed and suddenly the doors to the chamber opened
with the blast of light, the Soldiers and Mao standing between them saw nothing
except the table, a bone as they entered the room they saw on the floor words....thousands...millions of words
Mao began reading a line, then a hideouse laugh came from somewhere in the room and the Doors slammed behind Mao Soldiers Ran to the Main room were Mao was locked and began breaking it down when they opened the door they found Mao shivering on the floor and the 2 Soldiers Dead Suddenly a POCK sound and another soldier fell
another POCK and the Other soldier was shot in the stomach and fell wincing More Soldiers began running to the darkened room Suddenly one soldier heard a Pock and the last thing he saw was a Red Ball a Ping Pong Ball before he was shot through the head as he fell to the ground all hell broke loose soldiers began shooting everywhere
As the Shooting stopped for a moment the Soldiers could hear a guitar and singing "China....How Long must I stay with you, How Long must I hate you before I come to love you Chinaaaaah" TWANG a Soldier flies against a wall
The soldiers begin shooting again they stop shooting and there is silence...out of the Darkness Appears a man with a long beard holding Mao prisoner by his guitar handle Dylan says "Make a move F_ckers" The Soldiers look at one another and Mao Screams "LET HIM GO DON SHOOT DON SHOOT" Dylan whispers in Mao's Ear "Don't think It's gonna be that Easy you Fat bastard" As Dylan pushed Mao Away and Swings his Guitar hitting mao across the Back he Flips up in the Air and disappears an Echoed voice says "What the hell do you think i've been practicing for these 12 months" TWANG a Soldier flies into the Darkness, and Out walks a Decapitated body Dylan Hath caused many Deaths among the Peoples Army in China as he Raided the Main Corridors the Shooting rang out but nothing could harm him He was dragging Mao with him Mao was telling him were the gloves were they had installed the gloves in the Museum of China Dylan whispers "Then thats were we're going fatso" and continues to drag him. When Dylan reached the museum he entered and Saw in the Gift shop the Very old man and boy who stole his gloves
they saw him and laughed with each other and said "Hey Look its Mistah F_ckah" Dylan Smiled
from the outside the people could hear the screams the main lobby was soon flooded with bodies
Then the Exhibition the banner Read"BOB DYLANS FAVORITE GLOVES DONATED AS A GIFT TO OUR GLORIUS CHAIRMAN MAO" Bob Dylan raised his guitar and Screamed a Scream so loud that cracks fell from the great wall
He smashed the glass case with his guitar All the Fire Alarms and Burgalar alarms turned on all the cars began to beep the water began to spray from the roof and Dylan Smiled for it was good and he picked up his gloves
and looked at them....and said...."What the F_ck!" These are made out of paper" and Mao from amidst the bodies in the main lobby said "DO YOU REALLY THINK WE WOULD PUT YOUR ACTUAL GLOVES FOR THE PUBLIC HAHAHAHA NEVER!" By the Time Dylan Reached the main lobby he could see Mao's Fat Ass running down the street
Dylan didnt have time to crawl over all the bodies...so he plucked a string from his guitar
and he bent it Mao was even more distant now Suddenly As Mao Laughed a Laugh and said "YOU CANT CATCH ME MISTAH DY....."He fell to the floor a metal string in his spine it was finally over Dylan never thought to look in Mao's Pocket the gloves were there as well a a de oderant and a pair of panties