Title: Vision Boy and The Initiative 
Series: Vision Boy 
Author: Shara Nesu
E-mail: Shara-Nesu@supanet.com
Website: http://www.shara-nesu.supanet.com/index.html
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairings: Spike/Angel (Angel/Willow)
Rating: Series rating NC17 
Warning: M/M/& M/F sex
Spoilers: Re-write of Buffy Season 4. What if... Events had gone the way 
show in Birthday (Angel Season 3.) Cordelia finds fame and fortune while 
Angel receives the visions when Doyle dies. In this timeline Angel decides 
that he is unable to cope with the visions alone and it's time to go home to 
one woman he trusts - Buffy - unfortunately things don't go to plan.
Summery: Timeline Changes: Angel Season 1: Hero - Angel receives the 
visions from Doyle's kiss the same time as in Sunnydale - Episode: The 
Initiative - Spike is just getting captured by the Initiative. In this universe I 
Will Remember You will never happened. Oz has already left Willow & 
she has meet Tara - A friend. Basically this is a re-write of The Initiative 
with the new character of Angel - vision boy - hence the title
Disclaimer: Joss & TV company owns them all! I'm just correcting them.
Notes: Many, many thanks to Lisa!


Vision Boy


Upon arrival home after HERO - Angel's POV:

Doyle's dead. Gone. He sacrificed himself for me. A vampire. It should 
have been my death, not his. I've lived for so very long - over 240 years. 
How long did he live? Not even 30. 

I don't remember coming home, but the next thing I do is crawl into the 
shower. Thoughts of how unfair the fates are scream through my brain. 
Doyle was just a child compared to me. He should have lived. I won't 
understand, not until my dying day, why he sacrificed himself. I stand 
under the shower and let the hot spray wash away the dirt and grime from 
fighting the Scourge. My hands are shaking and I cannot clean myself. I 
just stand there with the hot water flowing over me.

What I can't understand - what I'll never get my head around, not matter 
how much I try - is: why did he kiss me? I wasn't attracted to him and nor 
him I, but there was always a deep friendship there. A friendship I've 
never experienced before - not even with Buffy. And now I never will 
again. My friend is dead, and his parting gift was one last kiss.

I rest my head on the white tiled shower wall and sigh. I feel too tired and 
weak, but thankfully the hot water slowly relaxes my body. I could 
almost....

*Pain... broken glass... flash of a knife... burning... girl's face...*

What the fuck?

A blinding throb of agony rips through my brain and in seconds I'm on the 
floor of the shower. Blood drips on the floor mixing in with the water. I 
realise I've cut my arm from wrist to elbow on the broken shower handle. 

*A bloodied knife* 

Oh god, what is this? Pain burns its way through my mind again and I see 
more flashes of light. I think they are supposed to be pictures but I can't 
make them out. I can't see them properly. I try harder to look, but the 
shooting anguish only increases. I hear someone howling in torture. Their 
screams almost animalistic in nature. So much pain.

*Hotel room... bloodied knife... girl's face... broken glass... bloodied 
knife... broken glass... girl...*

"STOP!" I scream. I can't comprehend the images. They are too painful, 
too fast.

*Burned sheets... bloodied knife... broken glass... knife... girl... glass... 
sheets... burning...*

"No! Please... Please... stop!" I'm sobbing on the floor of the shower, the 
water still flowing over my quivering form. My head feels as though 
someone's put a hammer through my brain, and all that's left is a pile of 
mush. My hands clutch desperately at my face, ripping at my flesh, trying 
to stop the apparitions. My eyes burn with the aftermath of the vision as if 
scorched. I just can't picture them. They were confused flashes of 
something I couldn't understand. The howling returns again and I think 
the beast making that sound is me. It feels as though I'm becoming 
detached from myself... distant.

*Laughter.... broken glass...*

"No more!" I scream. Please, I can't take anymore. I don't understand!! I 
don't know what I'm supposed to do. "I don't understand," I howl into my 
silent apartment. No one answers; there is no one here anymore. I have no 
friends, the last one just died. Doyle is dead and I'm alone. Doyle kissed 
me and now all I have left is the visions. I start to cry now, cry not for that 
girl I can't save, but for myself. There is no one around to comfort me 
either. My tears dry up and I look down at my bloodied fingers. Ah... food. 
I stay in the shower all night, the water falling on my pounding head, and 
lick my fingers clean.

~*~*~*~

Next Morning

My flesh is shrivelled and sore. I stayed in the shower all night, 
desperately afraid to move in case the visions filled my mind again. 
Finally, I got over my ridiculous fear of moving. I slowly crawled from 
the shower and wrapped myself into a white towel. My next step was to 
find whiskey. Isn't that what Doyle used to have after the visions? I'm not 
sure; thinking just makes my brain hurt more. My trembling fingers won't 
open the damn whiskey bottle when I find it and I throw it against the wall 
in a fit of temper. The broken glass shatters across the floor, brown liquid 
staining the wall.

*Broken church glass... screaming girls... a white habit...*

I clutch my head, squeezing my eyes tightly closed, trying to shut the 
visions out. My knees give out and I'm back to lying on the floor, my 
body convulsing. This time the vision's aftershock of pain wares off 
quicker and I catch my unnecessary breath. I smell blood and I bring my 
hand to my face. I must have cut myself on the broken glass, and the red 
blood is slowly staining my pale skin.

*Screaming girls... red blood dripping from my fangs...*

With my other hand I pick up a large piece of glass next to me and with 
one quick movement slash my wrist. The pain burns through my arm, 
replacing the vision anguish lancing through my brain. Oh, thank you. 
Any pain is better than that. I continue to distract myself from one acute 
pain with another. The only trouble is the floor is getting kind of slippery, 
and I can't feel my fingers anymore.

*Screaming girls...*

Then blessed unconsciousness.

~*~*~*~

When I awaken for the second time this day my body no longer throbs 
from the vision aftermath, but from the lack of blood. At least this is 
something I can deal with - it's a pain I can understand. It takes me 
awhile, but I manage to crawl over to the fridge and open it. Inside is my 
salvation - 4 packets of pig's blood. I really need more with the amount of 
blood loss I've suffered, but it will have to suffice until I can get out. 
When I've finished off the last of the blood, feeling a little more alive - 
well, un-alive - I carefully make my way into my bedroom. It takes awhile 
to get dressed, my body feeling I've gone ten rounds with Lennox Lewis.

After dressing I make my way up into the office. My office looks just the 
same, but when I step into the reception... It's the same. Nothing's been 
moved since Doyle and I rushed out of here the day before. A spare 
leather coat of Doyle's still rests on the back of the chair. There are used 
glasses smelling of strong Irish whiskey, scribbled notes in well grammar-
ed English, and the computer keyboard with the missing return button 
because he couldn't get it to work. My hand trembles as I reach out and 
touch his jacket. My mind flashes back to last night, his burned face, his 
flesh falling away - his death. A death that should have been mine.

"No!" I shove the jacket aside, knocking over the chair and sending it 
flying into a pile of papers. Everything scatters across the floor...

*Broken glass*

Doesn't it ever stop! I grab my head, ripping at my hair - anything to stop 
it! I can't do this alone! I don't understand them... I don't... I stumble back 
knocking the flashing telephone off the desk. There is a clicking noise, 
then a voice.

"#You have one new message#... Angel? Eh... I hate this damn machine... 
Do I speak now, Willow?" There is a mumbled sound in the background, 
"Yes, well... Hello Angel, this is Giles. We've been having some problems 
here in Sunnydale... Oh, nothing to get worried about, Buffy's fine. Just 
some bizarre demon activity and I was hoping you could send me that 
book you have on Demon migration patterns. We have demons showing 
up dead that should never been seen this side of the equator and... Oh, 
Willow says I have to fin.... #End of Message.#"

Sunnydale. There are people there that know me. Not anyone I could call 
friend, but people I can trust. People like Giles who might be able to help 
me understand what's happening. Or Willow, maybe she could magic this 
away. I can't face this by myself even though I'm afraid of going back to 
Sunnydale. I know Buffy won't be happy to see me, but I need help and 
now.

*Bloodied fangs...*

I squeeze my eyes shut and push the image away. Whatever it means I 
can't help anyone if I can't understand what the visions are telling me. I 
dig around for my car keys, and then wait for the sun to set. I should pack 
some clothing, but I can't get my head around doing anything. I just sit 
curled up at the door waiting. My head pounding with the residue of 
another vision I can't comprehend. With the last ray of sunlight I move, 
grabbing a coat to cover my head I run out to my car and start the engine. I 
need help and I need it now. The engine roars into life and I press the 
accelerator to the floor boards. The only thought on my mind is getting to 
Sunnydale and ending these vague predictions.

~*~*~*~

Somewhere under Sunnydale - Initiative compound: Spike's POV:

I don't believe it! Someone must really hate me up there. That's the only 
answer I can think of. Fate hates me. First, I lose the bloody ring of 
Amarra to the slayer. Next I lose it again to my bloody poof of a Sire. 
Then I get electrocuted by a band of wannabe soldier boys. Now, I wake 
up here. 

The cell is white - blindingly so - with a glass door. The handle is 
electrified. I got my fingers burned testing it. Before the cell is a plain 
white corridor. There are no windows, no other entrances, nowhere to 
escape to and nowhere to see where the hell I am. This is all the slayer's 
fault. I bet she's behind it, and...

Suddenly, a panel in the white ceiling is opened, and a blood bag is 
dropped down. I grab it, giving it a testing smell. It smells human, well at 
least the food's good. I start to tear it open with my teeth, but a voice stops 
me.

"Don't drink it. It's drugged."

I don't believe it! Damn it, I sound like Victor Meldew! I throw the pack 
aside and kick the wall with frustration. "Uh-huh. And who are you, 
mate?" Is he vampire, like me? Does the slayer capture vampires to play 
with since her lap dog vampire left her? Still, this is still a little high tech 
for her. She's more of a broadsword and axe kind of gal.

"I'm a rat. I'm a lab rat, just like the others. They're gonna kill us, you 
know." 

"And how are they gonna do that?" Yeah, I'd like to see them try. The big 
bad can take any humans on. I'll show them what a master vampire can 
do.

"They starve you, and when your ready to bite your own arm, they shoot 
out one of those packets. You drink, and the next thing, you're gone. And 
that's when they do the experiments." 

"And, uh, they are? The government? Nazis? A major cosmetics 
company?" 

"Who cares? All I know is, one minute I'm running from the slayer, and 
the next thing I'm here." 

"The slayer! I knew it! I knew it!" I knew the Slayer had to have her claws 
into this! 

"Yeah, she took apart my crew, and led me straight to these guys."

"She set me up, too. I always worried what would happen when that bitch 
got some funding," I howl, slamming my hands into the wall. I can't 
believe she would stoop this low. What happened to a clean fight, one on 
one kind of thing? Where's her honour gone? "She's wised up a bit. Fine! 
I'll take her apart. I don't care how brilliant she is!"

Suddenly, there's a whole lot of noise from down the corridor. I press my 
face to the glass door, trying to peer around it. Damn it! I can't see a 
bloody thing. Whatever is happening. there is a hell of a lot of screaming 
going on. From the sound of it the captive is vampire. He's growling, 
whining and then howls in pure agony, almost loud enough to hurt my 
ears.

"Strap him down!" yells one of the humans - female from the sound.

"Damn well, sedate him then!" Another shouts - a man this time.

"I have!" 

The vampire continues howling, and I can hear him fighting his captors. If 
he makes it out then I'll have my escape route.

"Pain... Glass... Blood... Noooo!" howls the vampire.

Oh god, no! It can't be... No way! That sounds like my bloody poof of a 
Sire - Angel. The sounds of fighting continue and the vampire - Angel? - 
starts to sob. I can hear punches impacting on hard vampire flesh and 
screams of pain while the woman yells for the vampire to be held down. 
This is unbelievable. That can't be my Sire. Angel would never let himself 
be captured. Anyway he's one of the good guys... Still, what if the slayer 
as nothing to do with this place. Where the hell am I?

The sound of fighting lessen and the trolley is dragged down the hall. I 
jump away from the glass door, and sit on the floor, trying to look 
uninterested as they pass. There are 4 men in uniform and a short blond 
woman with a syringe in her hand. They are still struggling with the 
writhing vampire on the trolley. They have managed to strap his legs 
down but he continues to fight them off with his hands. To my surprise 
and extreme interest they stop just outside my door. The vampire fights 
the woman back with a violent push, and she falls against my door.

"Hold him!" she screams at the soldiers. One of them, a tall man with dirty 
blond hair, uses the butt of his gun and impacts into the side of the 
vampire's face. The vampire screams in pain as his skull splits, splattering 
blood on my door. His struggles weaken and the men strap him firmly 
down onto the trolley. The blond woman stabs him hard in the neck with 
her syringe and the crying ceases. The soldiers finally step away from the 
restrained vampire.

"Angel..." I murmur. I can't get over the shock. That screaming, howling 
vampire is my Sire. I don't make another sound, I don't want these 
humans to realize I know him. Instead, I listen carefully to their words.

"Agent Finn, were was this hostile found?" The woman with the blond 
hair leans over Angel and flashes a light into his golden eyes. "Hmm... 
Unresponsive," she murmurs to herself.

"There was an accident just outside of town; one of our patrols picked him 
up."

"He'd caused a traffic accident?" She questions.

"No, he was driving a black Plymouth convertible, no one else was 
involved. It looked like he had just driven into a tree. When the unit found 
him, he was incoherent and writhing on the ground in agony."

"Pain?" The woman studies Angel's face again, with a sudden movement 
she stabs the needle into his cheek. Angel doesn't even flinch. "He doesn't 
show signs of feeling pain," she comments coldly to the soldier.

"I was told he was screaming about some woman in a hotel room, a 
bloodied knife and broken glass."

"Do you know what it means?" she asks.

"No, he doesn't respond to any questions."

Angel suddenly murmurs on the trolley, his body convulsing. "Pain... 
blood... knife... girl..." he whimpers softly.

"I was told he's been having fits like this one since they picked him up."

"Interesting..." the woman opens Angel's golden eye again and stares at 
him. He shows no response to even knowing she's touching him. "It could 
be some sort of seizure. Epilepsy maybe."

"What do you want to do with him?" asks the blond soldier Finn.

"Leave him here for the time being. When one of the laboratories is free, 
transfer him there. This one needs to be carefully studied." The woman 
gives Angel an appraising look and for some reason her attitude makes me 
shiver.

"Yes, Professor Walsh."

The professor leaves and Finn turns to one of his men. "Strip the hostile 
down, then check if one of the labs is free," he orders. The rest depart, 
leaving just the one soldier. I don't move from my sitting position, 
showing no sign of my desperate need to have a closer look at Angel. I 
haven't got a clue to what's happened to him. He's never done anything 
like this in all the time I've known him. Angel, or Angelus for that matter, 
never had seizures.

I watch as the solider cuts away Angel's clothing, leaving him in his 
shorts. He checks over the restraints, pulling them tight before he leaves. 
At last I can move. Slowly I edge over the glass door, checking there's no 
one around.

"Angel?" I whisper. I don't know if he can hear me, maybe it was all a 
show for the humans. If it was then it's a pretty stupid idea. I wait a 
moment and there is no response from Angel. "What the hell are you 
doing in Sunnydale?" I ask his unresponsive form.

I check out his body. Angelus has always been a handsome man. Bastard 
used to have women throwing themselves at his feet. Now, he looks ill. 
Which is almost impossible for a vampire. He reminds me of Drusilla. In 
Prague they cut her to shreds; it was amazing she survived - that's how 
Angel looks now. His body is pale, thin, and there are half-healed scars on 
his arms and wrists. It looks as though someone's slashed his arms over 
and over again. There is a large healing gash running from elbow to wrist 
on the arm nearest me, and the head wound from the Solder's gun isn't 
healing as quick as it should. The smell of his strong blood is making my 
mouth water. I also notice that every now and then Angel's body 
convulses as if in shock.

Down the corridor the sound of a door slamming shut brings me out of my 
contemplations, and I step back away from Angel. The soldier returns, this 
time with another older man dressed as a doctor. He looks Angel over and 
checks his eyes again.

"Hmm... Heavily sedated. Was he violent?" he asks the soldier.

"No, he was having some sort of seizure. Professor Walsh wants a full 
examination."

"Hmm... He'll need to go to lab 12. I'll need special equipment to see 
what's going on inside here." The doctor taps Angel on the forehead and 
laughs. Together they pull the gurney down the corridor and out of my 
sight.

I sit quietly for a long time. I haven't decided yet how I feel about all this. 
For some reason the thought of those humans cutting into my Sire's head 
enrages me. I really don't understand why - I hate him. I've tried to kill 
him on more than one occasion, I've even had him tortured. So why 
should this bother me? They'll study and then kill him, and I won't care. 
No, I won't even shed a tear for him or his passing. No! Now, I have to 
think about my own survival. I have to escape this hellhole before they 
take me away on one of those trolleys.

~*~*~*~

Two days later and the only idea I have to escape is to play dead. It's 
simple and I just hope these soldier types are going to fall for it. The 
vampire next door said that you drink the blood and fall unconscious, and 
then they take you away. Well, that's how I'm going to play it. I empty out 
the blood in the packet and lie down on the floor. I have no idea how long 
this will take, so I'll just have to try not to move until someone comes.

Finally four hours later, two men in medical clothing arrive at my door. I 
play dead - which is very easy considering I am dead - and don't make a 
move as they open the door. I don't listen to their chatter, playing possum 
until both of them start to lift me up onto a gurney. As they begin to strap 
me in, I make my move. My eyes flick open and I grab the nearest guy by 
the throat.

"Sorry, can't stay. Got to go see a girl," I tell him. I grab him by the arm 
and flip him over the gurney. He crashes onto the floor with a loud grunt. 
The second orderly is better prepared and manages to grab my arm and 
slam me into the opposite wall. He's strong for a human, but not strong 
enough to hurt me. Next to me the other vampire starts shouting.

"Let me out!" he yells, banging against the glass door. 

"Bit busy right now," I answer back 

"Look, I know where the exit is. You spring me, you're free. You don't, 
you're dead."

Ah... he has a point. I throw the second orderly off me and into the first 
who scrambles off the floor, and pulls out a large syringe from his pocket. 
I cringe as the second man backs onto the wickedly sharp end. That's one 
out for the count. The first orderly looks up alarmed while I vamp out, and 
I slam his head into the wall, and he's collapses before me.

"Hurry! Hurry!" screams the young vampire. Impatient and stupid from 
the sounds of it. I run over to the drugged orderly sprawled out on the 
gurney. Quickly checking his pockets, I find a security card, and swipe the 
door handle. Yes! I use it to free the vampire and he grabs my arm, pulling 
me down the corridor.

"This way!" We run down the corridor, and dive under the closing 
security door at the end. In the next room is an elevator and another 
security door leading to a corridor with large numbered doors. For the first 
time I pause. Are those the labs where Angel was taken? No... I've got to 
remember that I don't care about him. He's not a part of me anymore. Not 
my Sire, not my Yoda, and certainly not my lover... Oh, shit why did I 
have to remember that part? Damn it!

"Come on!" screams the vampire. Suddenly, behind me I hear the elevator 
start to hum. I've got to make a quick decision - Angel or elevator?

"Bugger!" I cry. I run towards the lab doors and swipe the card.

"What are you doing?" 

"New plan! We split up." I quickly dash through the opened door and slam 
it shut. It's a damn good job I did choose this route. Upon checking 
through the door's window, I see that the elevator has opened and inside 
it's full of ops guys. They grab their guns and shoot the other vampire 
down. Sucker! While they are dealing with him, I turn my attention back 
to the laboratory doors. On each door is a number starting with a three - 
Great! Oh well, I just have to hope that 312 is going to be Angel's room. I 
locate the door, but unfortunately it doesn't have a window so I can't 
check if anyone is inside. I just have to chance it.

Carefully, I open the door and peek around it. Inside, I notice the doctor 
on a stool looking over my Sire's head. He is far too engrossed in his work 
to notice me, and I quietly enter. My face immediately morphs into 
vampire features when I walk towards my Sire. Even as a demon the sight 
of him makes me queasy. They have started their tests. There are tubes 
and needles injected all over his body. Pieces of skin are missing on his 
arms and legs. It looks like they've even taken a sample of semen.

"I haven't finished the samples yet," the doctor informs me, "wait a 
moment, and I'll have the brain tissue sample ready."

He must believe I'm one of the lab technicians. I approach him slowly and 
notice he has a long scalpel in his hand, making an incision into my Sire's 
forehead. In his other hand he holds a drill piece. What shocks me more 
than anything - is that Angel is conscious. Large golden eyes stare terrified 
at the ceiling, tears running over his cheeks. Well, I just snap. I grab the 
doctor around the head and twist. 

"Arghh!" I scream as a shockwave of pain rockets through my brain. I 
don't loosen my grip, and I hear the satisfying snap as his neck breaks. 
When I finally let him fall, the pain in my head lessens. What the hell was 
that? Testing it, I kick the dead human - nothing - weird.

"Angel?" I whisper, turning my attention back to my Sire. I pick up a cloth 
beside his head and wipe the blood from his face. A part of me wishes I 
had gotten here sooner, before they started the tests. His body is a 
testimony of human cruelty. "Angel!" I repeat louder.

"Blood... glass..." he moans. His eyes move suddenly and find mine. For a 
moment they are unseeing and then... "No!!! Pain... I don't know... please, 
I don't have it... Hurts... Please, I don't have the ring!"

Huh? Angel tries to scramble away from me, but he can't escape the 
bonds. So instead he starts to cry. Huge sobs rack his body and he 
trembles violently on trolley. 

"Please, I can't... I can't give it you... I would, but you can't use it right... 
Please, forgive me... my beloved Will."

"What?" I gasp.

"I can't..." he moans again. His eyes close and his body tenses as if 
awaiting the next blow.

I think he believes he's back in that warehouse, where I took him to be 
tortured by that pillock, Marcus. I couldn't do it myself. I couldn't bring 
myself to mark his body, a body that had been my Sire and my lover's. A 
deep part of my heart feels suddenly guilty, but it's pushed aside when I 
remember his words. *My beloved Will* Yeah right, if I was so bloody 
beloved why the hell did ya leave me? Bastard! I turn away from him, 
resolute to leave him to his fate. 

Oh god, they've branded a number on his leg - 312. It's like he's a piece 
of meat to them. Bloody hell, what the hell do I do now? Leave him or 
take him? Let him suffer as I want him to or show mercy like Angelus 
never showed me... Oh, shit!!

"Damn it! I hate you, Angel, so why the hell am I saving you?" I shout at 
him as I unbuckle his restraints. I yank out tubes and needles, cringing 
with every scream he makes. I pull him up, his body slippery from blood, 
and he stands up unsteadily. Great, now I need clothing. Lugging him 
around nearly naked is sure to bring attention. I wrap my arm under his, 
and guide him to the door. He limps painfully, but makes no sound. His 
eyes are open, but I don't think he really understands what's happening.

I open the lab door, and check the corridor, thankfully I find no one 
around. I pull Angel out of the lab, hobbling behind me. Down the 
corridor there is a door labeled - Doctor's restroom. Ha... Clothing. 
Dragging Angel in behind me, I quickly find an open locker and grab 
some scrubs. I pull them onto his injured body, staining the blue material 
red.

"Are you real?" he whispers suddenly. His face has returned to its human 
plans and brown tearful eyes look into mine.

"Yeah, of course I am," I answer briskly. The fear in Angel's voice jerks 
something alive within my dead demon heart. It starts a need that throbs 
deep inside me. A need that I don't understand and grows with each 
moment I'm near him.

"Spike, wouldn't help me... you are just another vision," he sighs sadly.

"Hey! I'm bloody real mate! If I weren't - would you really dream about 
me helping you?" 

Angel looks confused and then something flashes across his eyes. Soft 
bloodied fingers touch my cheek, and then fall away. "You are real," he 
answers in awe.

"Fine, I'm real. Now, can we get the fuck out of here before both of us are 
dust - then neither of us will be real."

Suddenly, there is shouting down the corridor and I pull Angel away from 
the door. Shit! I grab a chair and shove it in front of the door, forcing it 
shut. Now what? I spin around looking for another escape route.

"Err... Spike?"

"What!?" I shout back. I really don't have time for more stupid questions. 
I turn and stare at Angel, noticing he's pointing upwards. I look up and see 
a huge air conditioner duct.

"Yes!" I shout. Without realizing it I grab Angel into a quick hug, but then 
just as quickly disengage myself. What the hell am I doing? Angel stares 
at me with wide startled eyes and a bemused smile on his lips.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Damn well help me." I indicate for him 
to give me a lift up, and he does. I notice he's not as strong as he should 
be, but I manage to grab a supporting cable. I haul myself up and give a 
hand down to Angel. For a moment, he hesitates and I know what's going 
through his head. He's wondering if he should trust me, the only problem 
is I'm his only choice. He gives a deep sigh and catches my hand. 

Half an hour later, we climb our way through the air conditioning system 
and follow it up until we reach an outside vent. Guessing from the smell 
and feel of the facility, we must be underground, which hopefully means 
this vent should lead us to the surface. With our combined strength, we 
manage to push the vent open. I'm greatly relieved to find myself outside 
in the open air.

"Yes!" I shout, jumping up and giving a little victory dance. I look over at 
Angel and notice he's giving me another bemused smile. That smile 
immediately tugs at my heartstrings, and I find myself smiling back at 
him. Damn it, I'm turning into a bloody poof. I've had enough of this!

"Well then, mate, this is where we part company. It was nice and all, but I 
really have to go back to hating you." I straighten my jacket, search out a 
new fag and start walking away from him.

"Thank you, Spike," he calls after me.

I walk away into the night without looking back... Okay, I sneak one quick 
look. He's still at the open vent, cleaning the grass from his stolen 
clothing. I snigger softly, still so damn... What the?

"Arghhh!" Angel screams. In seconds, he collapses onto the damp grass, 
his body convulsing in agony.

"No!" he hollers again. His hands claw at his hair and eyes. "No more... 
Please... no more!" 

For a moment, I don't move. Should I help him? I mean I don't even like 
him, but... I feel something. When I'm around him, I feel... What? Warm? 
Hot? Horny? Damn it. I drop my unlit fag and run back towards my Sire.

"No! No!" he's yelling over and over. His hands ripping at the flesh of his 
face. There are large gorges over his eyes which are bleeding profusely.

"Have you lost your fucking mind!" I scream at Angel, grabbing hold of 
his clawed fingers. He still continues to try and claw his eyeballs out. His 
eyes are bloodshot, and his face covered with his own blood.

"No!" he howls, "Girl... running... trees... fangs..."

What the hell is going on? Angel starts to convulse in my arms, his mouth 
frothing slightly. "Running... trees... fangs... blue car... running... NO!" 
Angel's body arches, and I hear bones grinding until he finally collapses 
unconscious.

He's finally done it. He has gone bloody nuts. Insane - wacko - barmy. 
You name - he's it. I realize now that a lot of his injures must have been 
self-inflicted, but only recently. These injuries are no more than a couple 
of days old, and not all caused by those Nazi doctors. They must have feed 
him, so the injuries were deep, and it amazes me that he could cause 
himself so much agony. Why? What the hell is his damage? Damn it. 
Things are going from bad to worse. I told ya, someone has to hate me. 
First Dru, next the ring, then those fucking soldiers boys capture me, now 
I have an insane Sire to deal with.

"Why me?!" I scream out into the night.

Suddenly, behind me I hear a noise. It sounds like someone running. Huh? 
I leave Angel lying on the ground and venture out. The sound is coming 
from just beyond a group of trees. I run through them, and I find myself 
standing before the main building of Sunnydale College. So this solider 
base is right under where the Slayer goes to school - what a surprise! Out 
of the blue, a young man runs the corner, and slams directly into my chest.

"Save me!" he begs. He looks back panicked, and gives a sharp yelp when 
he sees a tall blond woman running towards us. Harmony? The boy jumps 
up, runs away from me and towards the parked cars. Harmony doesn't 
stop, but continues after the boy, fangs dripping. Now this feels familiar, 
but I can't understand why.

I watch as the boy rummages for something in his coat pocket and pulls 
out a set of keys. He runs towards a small blue car. Bloody hell! What was 
it that Angel said? Girl, blue car, running and fangs. That's exactly what 
I'm seeing here. The boy doesn't make it to the car, and Harmony brings 
him down by landing on his back. His yells are cut off as she drains him of 
blood.

"Spike? What are you doing back here?" She asks when she's finished 
draining the boy.

"Hey, is that any way to talk to your lover?" I laugh. 

"I can't believe your," she slaps my face hard, "Back! You bastard!" she 
screams. 

I guess she's not forgiven me yet, about that little misunderstanding we 
had... What am I saying? There was no misunderstanding, I just couldn't 
stand her anymore.

"No!" A voice screams behind her. With one sudden flash, a stake is 
driven hard into Harmony's back and she bursts into dust. Behind her 
stands the disheveled Angel. His bloodshot eyes stare right though me and 
then he notices the boy. For the second time ever I witness Angel start to 
cry. He collapses onto his knees and stares at the dead boy.

"I didn't understand..." he mumbles, "It hurt too much... I couldn't see..." 
He buries his head into his knees and starts to weep.

I kneel down beside him and touch his flat hair. "Angel, what do you 
mean you couldn't see?"

"It hurts... It hurts..." he cries. Suddenly, he looks up into my face. "I tried 
to save you. I was too late... I'm so sorry... so sorry." His cool hand 
touches my cheek and he leans forward. For a moment, I think he's going 
to kiss me, but at the last second he draws away. His face shocked and 
pale.

"Bloody hell, you had a vision!" I cry. My voice upsets Angel, and he 
curls himself into a ball again. "That demon chap you worked with... 
what's his name... Damen, Ducus, Do.."

"Doyle," Angel whispers in reply, "he kissed me, then he took my death."

"Huh?" He kissed Angel! A sudden wave of jealously passes though me 
and I grab his arms. "You kissed him..." Whoa! What am I doing? I don't 
care who the hell Angel kisses. I haven't in a long, long time. Not even 
when he was Angelus when he used to do it make me envious. However, 
through my shell-shocked brain I work it out. Doyle died and somehow 
Angel received the visions. Unfortunately, they seam to be sending him a 
little insane.

"William, men are coming," Angel suddenly shouts, his face screwed up 
with what I think is another vision. "Quickly, get Drusilla and we'll run to 
the mines!"

"Angel!" I grab his arms and shake him. "I'm real; you remember that, 
yes?" Angel gives attentive nod. "Drusilla is gone, we're not in Yorkshire 
anymore, this is Sunnydale, right?"

"William," Angel answers in a panicked voice, "men coming, burning 
lights!"

"Bloody hell, you're worse than Drusilla! We aren't... Oh shit!" I stand up 
shouting at Angel, when I suddenly notice a group of spotlights jumping 
around in the darkness. Men with lights - bloody soldiers, with guns and 
torches more like!

I grasp Angel's arm and drag him to his feet. He moans in pain, his hands 
clutching his head. "What else do you see!" I growl desperately.

"Burning... red... burning girl... red..."

What the hell does that mean? I pull Angel behind me and we set off 
running towards a 3 story dormitory building. Now this looks familiar - 
doesn't the slayer and her friends live here? That's it! Red girl - Willow! 
That's what Angel sees in his vision. The only question is will she help us 
or betray us? Or maybe we should kill her, or... I grab the door and swing 
it open. Behind me Angel holds on desperately to my jacket as I drag him 
along. We run down the hall, when I suddenly come to a screeching halt. 
On the wall is a list of student names, I grab it and quickly scroll down the 
names....

"Come on... come one... Yes, Willow!" I shout. "Hello, gorgeous!" I grab 
Angel's arm again and drag him up the stairs.

~*~*~*~

Willow's POV:

I can't believe it. My life officially sucks. Oz leaves me, my friends ignore 
me when I need them most, then I go to a party and what do they play? 
Oz's music! I can't escape it! The fates must hate me. That's why I'm here 
now in my shared dorm room listening to depressing music. I should have 
stayed at the party with Buffy, but that boy Riley never left me alone. 
Goddess, if he wants to get inside her pants so bad, why doesn't he just 
say it! I fall onto the bed and thump it hard. Ow!

Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I sigh, I bet it's Riley or maybe 
Buffy has forgotten her keys again. "Come in." I turn around and... No!

"Spike! Wh-what do you want? Uh, a spell? I can do that." Just great! I'm 
babbling to a vampire that I've just invited in, and who's going to kill me. 
Very clever, Willow! My life just gets worse! I do the only thing I can 
think of - run! I push past him, and towards the door. Instead of running 
out of the door, I run into something large and hard. The force sends me 
flying back, and Spike grabs my arm. He grunts with a sudden pain, and 
shoves me back.

"What the hell!" we both yell in unison.

Spike rubs his head and slams the door shut. My eyes drift down and I see 
the large barrier I ran into. Well, not a barrier - a man - Angel. He's 
dressed in doctor's scrubs that are bloodstained, and dirty. He's covered in 
lacerations and bruises. His face is a mass of gorges that look like nail 
marks. Spike reaches over to him as Angel curls into a tighter ball on the 
floor.

"You did this!" I scream at him. I dive on top of the blond vampire, and he 
attempts to push me off. 

"Hey!" he yells as I pull his hair. "What are you fucking doing!" 

I slam his head against the wall with strength I didn't know I had. "What 
have you done to him? You bastard!" I scream.

"OW!" he yelps as he tries to grab me. His hands clutch his head, and he 
moans in pain.

"Hey, I hardly touched you!"

"Men... burning... hurts..." Angel moans from the floor. Bloodshot eyes 
find mine and I approach him slowly.

"Angel, it's okay now, Spike is going!" I give Spike a glare and he stares 
back.

"Men... golden hair... coming... coming..." he sobs.

Spike jumps up and strides towards Angel, who's whimpering softly. I 
might not know Angel well, but I won't let Spike hurt him. Angel has 
saved my life many times before, the least I can do is return the favor. I 
jump on Spike's back and try to pull him away from Angel. Spike grabs 
my hands and swings me around. Suddenly, we both collapse to the floor 
as he howls, protecting his head again. I slap him hard.

"That's it," he yells. He grabs my arm, pulling me forward, and with a 
loud grunt of pain tries to bite me. "OW!" he howlers and falls back again, 
clutching his head.

"What the hell is happening!" Spike screams. He clutches at his forehead, 
moaning softly. "I mean this has never happened before!"

"Good," I yell. I don't want to be bit.

"I'll starve! Angel will starve. I can't help! I can't help myself!" Spike 
starts to moan and complain incoherently now. I can't make out 
everything thing he says, but he's truly upset. Then Angel starts to moan 
in distress. His reactions seem to be connected to Spike.

Why is around one around me miserable? Doesn't anyone see I'm hurting 
too! I shudder, with surprise at my self-misery. I turn to Spike and notice 
that he looks totally dejected. His head in his heads, and muttering to 
himself. It's strange, but... I feel so sorry for him. Even Angel is quite, 
staring at his distressed Childe.

"Maybe you were nervous." What am I saying? I just can't help it. Here I 
am standing watching Spike, the big bad, a vampire who tried to kill me 
on several occasions, and I feel sorry for him. "You were looking for 
Buffy weren't you, get yourself all worked up, but then you just find me. 
Useless, undeserving little Willow! I'm not even good enough to be 
vampire bait!"

"Huh?" he turns and stares at me. 

I feel even more depressed. Not even big bad vampires want me. No one 
does. "It's me, isn't it?" I whisper suddenly. There is something seriously 
wrong with me. No one wants me. Even Angel must have come here 
looking for Buffy.

"What are you talking about?" Spike grumbles back.

"I know I'm not the kind of girl vamps like to sink their teeth into. It's 
always like, `ooh, you're like a sister to me,' or, `oh, you're such a good 
friend.' I start to weep softly. Goddess, I feel such a failure.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'd bite you in a heartbeat."

"Really?"

"Burning... red... girl... Burning girl..."

"See even Angel wants you," Spike laughs.

"What?" Oh goddess, Angel! I forgot all about him in my self-indulgent 
misery. "What did you do to him Spike!" I scream.

"Nothing! It was those bloody solider boys. They tortured him, and..."

"Commando guys, in green suits and guns?" I interrupt. I just knew they 
were bad news.

"Yeah," Spike answers cautiously.

"Buffy ran into them a while back. We've been looking..."

"No... Not Buffy!" shouts Angel from the door. He trembles and claws his 
face again as if trying to fight something off. Spike approaches him, but I 
push him out of the way. I kneel down before Angel, pulling his hands 
away from his face.

"Shhh, it's okay, Angel, you're safe," I comfort him. He seems so scared. 
I'll kill those commandos for what they did to him. His beautiful face is all 
bloodied and he's so pale and gaunt. I touch his cheek gently, and he leans 
into my touch. Suddenly, however, his whole body stiffens and convulses 
in pain.

"Angel!" I cry, trying to soothe him. I turn to Spike, "what did you do to 
him?!"

"He's having a bloody vision," Spike yells back. He drags Angel from my 
arms and crushes him to his own chest. His hands gently stroking Angel's 
face as he holds him tight as his body convulses.

"It's okay, Sire... I have you..."

I watch amazed as Spike continues to pet Angel gently, while talking 
softly into his ear. Spike's calm voice seems to relax Angel and the 
tremors are less violent. Angel clings to Spike desperately, his wide eyes 
searching vainly as the vision takes hold.

"Tell me what you see, luv," Spike murmurs softly into Angel's ear.

"Men... coming... burning... it hurts! Will, it hurts!" Angel weeps, "it 
hurts... it hurts..." 

I start to cry too. I can't help it. All this time I've been so lost in my own 
pain, I ignored everyone else's. Well, I won't ignore Angel's. I creep 
forward and gently touch his face. Angel sobs with his eyes squeezed shut 
and the aftershocks of the vision are still passing through his muscles 
making him quiver under my fingers.

"What do you mean, visions?" I whisper to Spike. He gives me a dirty 
look, and I know he doesn't trust me. However, when Angel gives another 
violent tremor, he answers.

"Look, a couple of weeks ago, I went to LA to get the ring from Angel. I 
meet this half demon called Doyle; he was Angel's messenger from the 
powers. He had visions of people in trouble."

"Like a seer, and Angel helped them," I interpreted.

"I've just said that," Spike rolls his eyes and continues, "anyhow, this 
geezer died and somehow the visions passed to Angel. The thing is I don't 
think he can understand them. He had a vision about Harmony in the park, 
and then he started going on about the time we were in Yorkshire and had 
to hide in an old mine while running from a local mob."

"Oh, Angel," I whisper. I stroke his damp forehead, my fingers touching a 
recent hole in his skin. "Who hurt him then?"

Spike sighs and reluctantly tells me, "I came back to Sunnydale, got 
captured by these commandos, they have lots of vampires and demons 
imprisoned. I believe Angel crashed his car, and they found him and 
brought him there. They were interested in him because he must have had 
a vision when they picked him in. They sent him to be examined. I found 
him in this lab; some doctor had already started cutting him up."

"Angel," I whimper, kissing his forehead. I would never wish his 
misfortune on anyone. All three of us have been on the cutting edge of 
misfortune lately. Spike and his inability to bite, me and Oz, and now 
Angel and his visions. We are three of a kind. Maybe that's why I feel 
such empathy with him and Angel. Why I can trust a vampire, who 
messed up my life and then moments ago looked to be hurting Angel. It's 
like deep down - in my soul maybe - I can feel he's sincere. I can sense 
that there is no deception in Spike, and that he's scared for himself and for 
Angel.

"Willow," Angel suddenly mumbles. His eyes are open again and he's 
looking into my face. I think he recognizes me. "Are you real?" he asks 
softly.

"Yes, I am. It's Willow," 

"William?" he says, reaching out to touch Spike's cheek. I swear for just a 
moment there was something like love in Spike' eyes.

"I'm real too, Sire," Spike answers softly. I've never heard him speak like 
that. He sounds almost human. "What did you see, Angel?"

"I don't understand..." he starts to weep again.

"Angel, tell Spike and me, and maybe we can." I grasp his hand and he 
looks hopeful a moment.

"Men with lights... pain... gun... Willow! Buffy... run... betrayal... hurts..." 
he whimpers. I can see him trying so hard to concentrate, but the pain 
burns him. "William, the pit, run to the pit... I'm so sorry... I never meant 
to be angry... I couldn't lose you..."

"I'm here, Sire. We made it." Spike continues to stroke Angel's face and I 
realize that was something old and private between them. From the looks 
of it, it was an event that hurt Spike so much. His jaw jumps as he tries to 
contain his anger.

"Coming... Coming!!!"

"Angel, you're safe here..."

"No, Spike! I think he means they are coming, now!"

"Oh, shit! How the hell are they tracking me?"

"Flashing light... Burning bright... The rabbit finds the fox."

A tracking device! Damn it. These commandos are good, but I'm better. 
"Spike, you have to run."

"What! I won't leave Angel!"

"You have to! I think what Angel is trying to tell us is that they have some 
sort of tracking device on you. Angel was kept to be experimented upon, 
so I doubt it they gave him one. I might be wrong, but we can't risk it. I'll 
hide Angel from them and Buffy."

"The slayer and the commandos? I can just see them hitting it off," Spike 
laughs.

"He was afraid of seeing Buffy; therefore it's best we don't. You run and 
I'll take Angel to my house, my parents are out of town."

"Hey, how do I know you aren't working for them?"

"Angel, sent you here with a vision, didn't he," I state. I realize now that's 
why Angel brought them here.

"Fine!" Spike answer back. He climbs out of the window and balances on 
the ledge. "You promise you'll protect Angel!"

"I promise!"

With that Spike jumps down and vanishes from sight. I run to the window 
and I spot his quickly moving form cutting through the trees. There are 
shouts down the corridor, so I grab Angel and tug him to his feet. 
Suddenly, all the lights go out and we are plunged into darkness.

"There's a cold spot down here!" a man shouts. I'm guessing that the 
Commando's are back again. I drag Angel out of the dorm and across the 
corridor to the girl's bathroom. I've just had an idea and I pray it's going 
to work. We run into the bathroom, Angel limping painfully along, and I 
drag him into the shower. I turn on the spray and the hot water cascades 
down onto both of us. I hold Angel close, rubbing the hot water into his 
skin, hoping this is going to work.

"Where is it?" shouts another man.

I don't hear the answer, but I think my plan is working. Angel feels 
warmer, but I continue to rub him, making sure they can't find him. I hear 
the sounds of fighting and then nothing. I think they're gone, but I'm 
terrified to move. I promised to protect Angel, and I never want those 
bastards to touch him again. 

There is silence for what feels like forever. Angel remains pressed against 
my chest crouched here in the warm shower. His face is so pale, even 
though warmed and his body still trembles from the aftershocks of the 
vision. I'm a little confused on how those work. I would have thought he 
would just have the one vision - say - girl in danger from big bad vampire 
and then it would be over. Angel' visions seem to be almost continuous. 
He had a vision about the commandos, about me; next he saw them 
storming the dorm, after that he knew about Spike's tracking device. I 
think something is seriously wrong with Angel' visions. They are slowly 
breaking him apart bit by bit.

Finally, when I can't stand the water anymore, I pull Angel out of the 
shower. He's weak but follows my directions. We don't talk as I towel 
him down, and surprisingly he's been aroused by my closeness. It makes 
me blush. I'd never thought that Angel could find me attractive. He stared 
at my body through the wet clothing for a long moment after we climbed 
out the shower, and then turned away. For the first time, I feel alive again, 
that someone sees me. I haven't felt that since Oz left. Well, apart from 
seeing Tara. When I see her it's like the lights dim.

"Angel, we have to leave here. I told Spike we'd be at my parent's house." 
Angel nods and dries himself the best he can. That's one problem I'm 
going to have to sort. Angel has no other clothing. I just hope my father's 
old jeans will fit him, but they shall be very short. No one in my family is 
as tall as Angel is.

When I return to the dorm for a quick change, I find it empty. Thankfully, 
Buffy hasn't returned yet. I change into jeans and a jumper, then quickly 
run out to Angel. We make our way down the stairs and out through the 
back entrance. Great, I have to get Angel back home and I haven't any 
transport. We can't walk there with Angel soaked through like this. Tara! 
Tara has access to a friend's car. It doesn't take me more than 10 minutes 
to get to Tara's dorm, and convince her to help me. I just smiled and asked 
and she said yes. I'm still smiling when we pick up Angel in her friend's 
car.

Tara is very worried about Angel's appearance. I tell her he's been sick 
but nothing more. She doesn't ask questions. One day I hope I can tell her 
the truth. Half a hour later, we are at my parent's house. I thank Tara 
profusely, and I know I want to see her again. When I finally have Angel 
changed into my father's old jeans, and a clean shirt he's much more 
rested. I just hope Spike is fairing well. Boy, where did that thought come 
from? I shouldn't be concerned for him... should I. Yet, Angel seems so 
attached to him, and for that reason alone I'll help keep Spike safe. If it 
help's Angel, I'll give Spike my trust. Mind you, it's just for my friend - 
nothing more. He's still a vampire, and I shall have to watch my back.

Spike's POV:

I make my way quickly away from Willow's dorm. A couple of 
commando's tracked me for awhile, but I lost them. I have to wonder how 
the hell Angel knew about that. I should go to Willow's house and see him 
again. A part of me doesn't want to. He's making me feel things I have 
denied for over a century. He reminds me of how Angelus and I were 
lovers all those years ago. Even though Angelus couldn't really love 
anything, he did show me a little affection. Of course, the only time we 
were together was when Darla wasn't around. When she was, she was 
everything to Angelus - mother, lover, wife. While I was ignored and 
pushed aside. It was the same in that pit in Yorkshire. Earlier that week 
Angelus had loved me in his bed while Darla was away on a shopping trip, 
when she returned I was neglected. I didn't know at the time how jealous 
Darla was of anyone who took Angelus' attention. In my fury, however, I 
had taken my revenge out on the town's people. In the end, we were 
chased by a mob and ended up hiding in a coal mine. I always thought 
Angelus hated me at that moment. I think I was wrong. In fact, looking 
back, Angelus' whole attitude around me with Darla was one of hatred 
and fear. Fear of Darla discovering her Childe's relationship with me. 
Hatred because he couldn't show he desired me. I think it was a facade to 
make sure Darla never knew of our affair or of his probable depth of 
emotion for me. She never did know, not from him and certainly never 
from me. The only trouble was I never saw how much he wanted me, 
either.

When I look back, what hurts me more is that time in China. I remember 
him watching me, silent and alone. He would watch me for hours and it 
would just make me angrier and angrier. Now with unbiased eyes - I see 
that he was trying to tell me that he had a soul, trying to work out how to 
say the words. He never did and then he left. I certainly didn't tell him 
how I felt either - I lost myself in Dru's attentions and he never knew that 
I... loved him?

I sigh to myself. I have to go back to Angel. I have to know he's escaped 
and not dust. He and his visions saved me in that facility. Also, I have to 
understand how he really feels - or felt - about me. I have to know if he 
ever loved me.

I make it to Willow's house in good time. I knew where she lived; I made 
sure I knew about the slayer's helpers the first time Dru and me came to 
Sunnydale. It's dark when I arrive, but there's a note waiting for me on the 
door. I open it and read: If you're Spike, come in. Real clever, Red. I open 
the door and step inside. The whole house is dark and silent. They must be 
asleep. I make my way up the stairs and I catch the soft sounds of 
someone talking in the main bedroom. There is a glass door leading inside 
and from my position I can see Angel and Willow lying on the bed. 

They aren't together, and I fight down the sudden flicker of jealously. 
Angel is under the covers and thick blankets, while Willow lies above 
them, with his head on her stomach. She gently runs her fingers through 
his hair, calming him into sleep.

"You never saw him again?" I catch Willow asking.

"No, I left China the next night. Darla threw me out again," Angel answers 
in a tired voice.

"Angel, what did you really feel for him?"

"Willow, don't ask me that. You see me as Buffy's ex..."

"You're a vampire, Angel. I know what vampires are like, I met my 
vampire self, remember?"

The both laugh softly. Then Willow calms, and thoughtfully continues to 
stroke Angel.

"I'll tell you my secret, if you tell me yours," she whispers in a 
conspiratorially way.

Angel is quite for a long moment, "err... okay," he finally agrees.

"My secret is that," Willow begins dramatically, "I think I'm in love with 
Tara." 

A girl's name? Sweet, innocent little Willow is in love with another girl? 
Damn, I wish I had met this Vampire Willow.

"Tara, the girl that drove us here?" queries Angel, and Willow nods. 
Angel gives a little grin.

"I think I'm still in love with William," Angel admits back.

Willow chuckles and asks: "What do you say about coming out of the 
closet one day?" Angel gives a soft laugh, and rests his head back onto her 
chest.

I fall back away from the open door, stunned. I can't believe what Angel 
has just said. Does Angelus' soul love me? Bloody hell! My life is a mess, 
I can't bite and now I have emotional issues over my soul-ed Sire! Things 
can't get any worse! I step back, attempting to make a quick exit out of the 
house, and away from all the emotional angst my sire is causing me. I step 
back, and... Damn it! I walk directly into a large oriental style vase. It rolls 
on its edge of its perch, and before I can catch it, it tipples over with a loud 
crash.

"Fuck!"

"Spike?" Willow shouts out, fearfully.

"Yeah, it's me," I call back. 

Damn it!! Damn it!! I should just go. Walk away. Just say - "how are you, 
mate and now I'm leaving." I wander slowly into the main bedroom and 
look onto the bed. Angel's lifted himself up on his elbows and gifts me 
with a 100-watt smile. Wow! Unfortunately, he looks so pale and weak. 
That smile doesn't reach his eyes. His injuries are numerous, and slowly 
healing... Stop it! No! Stare him straight in the eye and say - "goodbye!" 
Unfortunately, my mouth doesn't listen to my brain. Damn traitorous thing 
it is, and answers to my heart instead.

"Angel, you okay?" He gives a quick nod. "You love me?" I blurt out. Oh 
god, just shot me now!

"Yes, I do," answers Angel directly. He's lying with Willow, watching me 
with serious brown eyes. He's in full control of his facilities too. Willow 
says nothing, just grins happily next to him.

"Okay, I'll be leaving now... Wait - you said - yes?"

"Yes, William, I do."

"Okay, wanna shag?"

"No," he laughs, "I hurt too much, but I would like you to sleep with me."

I start stripping out of my clothing as Willow quickly covers her eyes and 
turns away. I leave my jeans on and jump into the bed next to Angel. I'll 
worry about all the emotional angst tomorrow. I just want to hold him. I 
wrap my arms around my Sire and snuggle closer.

"I'll leave you to sleep then," Willow says disheartened.

Angel catches her arm and pulls her back down. "You are alone too, 
Willow. We all are. We all have suffered. I don't understand everything 
but I felt that in my visions. You belong with us." 

Willow gives the biggest smile I've ever seen for a long time. I don't fully 
understand Angel's words, since I'm far too exhausted to care. Tonight 
has been the longest of my life and I don't want to ever repeat it! Willow 
climbs into the bed and snuggles into Angel's other side. So the three of us 
entangle around each other, sharing our loneliness and sleep.

~*~*~*~

Initiative facility, Deep underground.

A blond woman steps out to greet Agent Riley Finn and his team. She is 
far from pleased with the outcome of their mission. In fact, her anger is 
barely contained as she notices they have returned empty handed.

"I'm sure you'll understand if I seem far from happy," Professor Walsh 
informs Agent Finn.

"Yes, ma'am. If you read my report you'll see..." begins Riley, his voice 
trembling with nerves. He'd never seen this type of vexation from his 
superior before.

"That Hostile 17 avoided recapture. That somehow he was pre-warned of 
your arrival. Then you have the audacity to lose Project 312! You fail to 
understand the importance of its recapture. That demon could..." she trails 
off, not wishing to deluge too much to just a lowly solider, even if he is 
her most trusted. "Then you say you had to fight someone else, who 
somehow escapes description," she finishes, clearly unhappy with the state 
of events.

"Whoever he was, the guy was big," Forrest confirms.

"Strong, too," agrees Graham.

"Whoever... Or whatever," adds Riley, clearly agitated to losing to some 
unknown demon.

Walsh is not amused by their attentions at defending themselves. She had 
trained them to be the best, not to be defeated by one measly demon. "I'm 
not interested in guesswork, gentlemen. Call me old-fashioned, but I like 
results. This report reads like a child's riddle book. Agent Finn, tell me 
something good. My implant?"

"The implant works. Hostile 17 can't harm any living creature, in any way 
without intense neurological pain. We'll bag it," Riley confirms, trying to 
save face.

"What of the project 312, did you receive any feedback from the 
interface," Walsh asks, not Riley, but a Doctor that steps forward. The 
soldiers look on in confusion at the laptop the doctor holds in his hands. 

"The interface experienced some difficulties; the subject's neuro-pathways 
are rejecting the implant. We have only received a few confused images, 
but they are getting clearer each time. Unfortunately, if we don't get 
Project 312 back soon to monitor its progress, we might lose the uplink."

"That will be a great loss, wouldn't you agree Agent Finn?"

"Err... yes. We'll have them both back here soon," he confirms, still 
unsure about the whole Project 312 subject, but knows better than to 
question the Professor.

"Yes, you will. Dismissed." Professor Walsh takes up the laptop and 
presses enter. Images flicker across the screen. Hostile 17 and red headed 
girl, surround Project 312. The images change to flashes of violence. A 
blond female vampire killing a young man beside a blue car, and so on.

"Project 312, you shall be my greatest achievement," Professor Walsh tells 
the laptop. The image of the subject' face appears when the replay of 
visions has finished. A tall, dark haired vampire stares back at Walsh from 
the screen. "You shall give me glory."~


Vision Boy 2: 


Angel's POV:

When I awaken I am surrounded by one hot and one cold body. I've never 
experienced anything like this sensation before. It's a position I could 
grow to like - very much so. I open my eyes and look down. On my chest 
rests two heads, one red and one blond. Their limbs are entangled with 
mine, making it so I am unable to move an inch. I would really like to lie 
here all day, but hunger burns through my stomach and I really need to 
eat. Yesterday, I lost a lot of blood and never had the chance to replenish 
it.

First, I slowly try to shift my arm from underneath Willow. She mumbles 
softly in her sleep and tugs me closer. That immediately gains a reaction 
from Spike, who slides his leg between mine. His knee rises up, pushing 
her of me slightly, and then rubs against my hardening cock. I can't 
contain a low growl as his weight presses against me.

"Uh... Oh... Oh!" Willow groans as she awakens. She pushes herself up 
and glazes around sleepily. She suddenly realizes that she's lying entwined 
with two vampires, and quickly disengages herself. With her loss, Spike 
cuddles even closer and wraps his arm around my waist.

"Uh... hi Angel," Willow says sheepishly, when she notices I'm awake.

"Morning, you slept well?"

"Oh yeah, like a baby..." Suddenly, Willow blushes a deep red, almost the 
same color as her hair. "Oh goddess, is that the time!" Her eye catches the 
readout on the digital clock radio beside her parents' bed. "I have lessons 
in half an hour!"

With the loud sound of her voice, Spike buries his face into my armpit, 
trying to dim the noise. My boy always slept better with another body 
pressed against his. When he used to sleep with me, over a hundred years 
ago, I used to have to drag him out of bed when dusk fell.

"Hmm... Willow?"

"Yeah," she answers while putting her clothing straight.

"You think you could pick me up some blood from Willy's, and maybe 
some clothing?"

"Sure! I'll get them before I meet Buffy..."

*Blond... burning... hatred... pain... betrayal...*

"ARGHH! No! Buffy... NO hurt!" I scream! Please, not again! I don't 
know if I can take anymore of this!

"Sire!" yells Spike. 

His voice sounds so distant. My mind fills with images of Buffy and some 
soldier. Tall with ash blond hair. I see them lost in an intimate embrace. It 
changes again, and they are talking. Another change - both are fighting 
together, side by side with other soldiers. I see Spike and I lying together - 
a stake at Spike's chest! I see Willow lost and alone.

"Three are one!" I scream - words I don't understand. "Three together, I 
am the principal!"

"Angel!" Willow's panicked voice echoes inside my mind.

The next image fills me, and for the first time it feels good. I see myself 
lying on a bed, not unlike this one. Willow is leaning over me, her red hair 
touching my face. We kiss desperately and I feel whole. Another joins us 
on the bed - Spike. His naked hard body glows in my mind's eye. An 
image of male perfection. He leans over me, kissing my lips, and now I 
feel completed. Another arrives - a woman with blond hair. I don't see her 
face, but I know she's not Buffy. Suddenly a new vision fills me, a golden 
chamber, and before me stands two people. A man and woman with skin 
of blue and gold.

"I am the messenger." They are talking to me, but the words are coming 
out of my own mouth. "I am the champion. Split in two, I touch the 
Oracles and am blinded by the light. The knowledge of the future resides 
in me, but the weight is too much to bare. Three must become one, to be 
guided by a wise woman."

The speaking ends and the burning agony returns. It rages through every 
cell of my body. I hear myself screaming, my voice breaking as the 
screams get louder and louder... and louder!

Willow's POV:

I can't understand the words Angel speaks. Especially when his voice 
changes and another talks through him. They say Angel is the messenger 
and the champion. That he sees the Oracles and knows the future. The 
three must become one. What does it mean? After the voices stop, Angel 
just continues to scream and howl as the pain from the vision overwhelms 
his body. He convulses so violently that I swear I can hear bones breaking. 
Tears are running down my face as Spike and I try to calm him. 

"Spike, do something!" I wail unable to take it anymore. He's in so much 
pain, and I can't do a damn thing to help him! I look over to see Spike's 
fear stricken face, tears filling his eyes as he tries to calm his Sire. I've 
never seen him like this. I know that in this moment he loves Angel. Not 
with demon love, but real human love. A love so powerful that he'd do 
anything to lessen Angel's suffering.

With one sudden movement, Spike sinks his fangs into Angel's throat. 
Angel's bellowing dies away as his voice breaks because of Spike's 
drinking. I watch as the demon I had feared so much in years past, press 
himself to Angel's body and comfortingly stroke him into 
unconsciousness. I see tears fall from Spike's closed eyes as he drinks his 
Sire down. After a few minutes, Angel's struggles lessen and he finally 
falls into a deep sleep. His body still trembles now and then, but it is 
nothing as violent as before. As Angel calms, I begin to sob. I can't help 
myself. I was just so scared, for me, for Angel, and for Spike. I couldn't 
bear seeing Angel hurt himself anymore. 

"What are we going to do?" I wail to Spike. 

He gently lies Angel back down on the bed and covers him with a sheet. 
He pushes Angel's hair from his forehead and kisses it gently. This has 
really shaken Spike up and I swear that he looks ten shades paler.

"We find a way to help him, luv," he finally answers, raising off the bed to 
dress.

"How? Who can we trust? I mean, we can't go to Buffy, there's no one in 
LA..."

"Then we go to the Watcher."

"Giles? Can we trust him? Giles doesn't really trust Angel, not since 
Angelus..."

"Willow, we have to find out what these Oracles are, and who are the 
'three who are one' that they talked about."

"Okay, I'll go to Giles, and you get the blood and clothing."

"Right," Spike agrees and pulls on his leather jacket. He lights his 
cigarette and heads to the door, "I'll be back in a couple of hours, 
Peaches," he calls back to the sleeping Angel.

For a moment, I just have to sit here in shock. I can't believe that I've just 
been talking civilly to Spike, that I'm protecting Angel from Buffy, and 
now I have to get Giles to trust these two demons. My life is just getting 
weirder and weirder. I make sure Angel is comfortable before I leave him, 
gently kissing his forehead like Spike did. I am filled with a sudden rush 
of feeling. Emotions I don't quite understand. I feel as though I need to 
protect him, save him, love him...

"I'll tell you another secret Angel, I think I'm falling for you, too."

~*~*~*~ 

It's mid afternoon when I finally reach Giles' home. First, I had to go back 
to my dorm to find Buffy waiting for me. She didn't say anything about 
not seeing me all night, but started talking about a Thanksgiving dinner. 
She's still my friend, and I fell uneasy not telling her about Angel or 
Spike. Unfortunately, the strong reaction Angel had to her name makes me 
cautious. I have to learn what all this means before I can trust her with my 
secrets. I agree about the dinner and then make my way to class. I never 
reach there; instead I go and visit Giles.

I expected to find Giles sorting his books as he did back in the old school 
Library everyday. He's not; in fact he's tuning an old guitar. Giles and 
music - that was something that never mixed in my head. It's a disturbing 
sight, and I get this sudden image of Giles dressed as a Bay City Roller 
screaming about free love. Ewww. I push that thought quickly out of my 
head!

"Ah! Willow, you gave me quite a start." Giles' voice breaks through my 
mental pictures and I realize I've been staring. "So what can I do for you? 
I'm afraid I don't know much about Thanksgiving dinners..."

"Buffy's been here?" I ask without thinking.

"Yes, earlier this morning. She wants to celebrate... that's not why you're 
here, is it?" Giles puts the guitar aside and cleans his glasses - at last 
something familiar.

I must say that Giles has always been perceptive, and he always gets to the 
point - so shall I. "Giles, what do you know about Seers, Oracles, 
Champions, Visions..."

"Whoa, that's quite a list. Can I ask what brought all this on?"

I sigh. I'm just going to have to trust Giles. I hope it's the right step. 
Unfortunately, neither Spike nor I understand what's happening to Angel, 
and we need help. So I decide to tell Giles the truth. I tell him about 
Angel, the visions, Spike, his inability to bite, and the commandos. When 
I've finished, Giles has gone through two pots of tea, and is starting on 
coffee.

"Do you know anything about the Powers That Be, Willow?" Giles finally 
speaks when I've finished the story.

"No," I admit. It's a title I've never heard before.

"There's a belief in the Watcher Council, that the Powers have two 
champions. One is the Slayer, and the other is an unknown one chosen by 
the Powers themselves. Instead of a Watcher to guide this Champion, they 
send a Seer or Messenger. There are always two, working together, just as 
Buffy and I do. Now the Oracles are guides for us lesser beings, and they 
can give more information than what a Seer can. Unfortunately, I don't 
know how to reach them. If what you say is true, that Angel is this 
Warrior, and he has now taken the power of Seer too..." He pauses, 
looking increasingly distressed.

"He'll go insane, won't he?" I whisper.

"I don't know," admits Giles, rubbing his glasses again. "From what you 
describe, Angel is almost constantly in this vision state. He's totally unable 
to control or perceive them correctly. Though I am at a lost to explain the 
other part. I don't know who the 'three who are one' could be, I'm afraid. 
Maybe when Buffy..."

"No!" I cry. I haven't told him that part yet. "No, Giles, please. Whenever 
we mention Buffy to Angel, he becomes terribly distressed. This morning 
when I said her name, he went into this trance like thing, and that's when 
these Oracles people spoke to him."

"Do you know why he was upset?"

"He says we can't fully trust her, that she'll betray us... I think. Spike 
believes that he's taking about her working with these Commando people."

"Spike... can you trust him?"

"Yes," I admit confidently, "Angel does, and when Spike tried to bite me 
he couldn't. They did something to him."

Giles rubs his eyes and sighs, cleaning his glasses. "Okay, I'll see what 
else I can find out, but I think I'm going to have to talk to Angel. Can you 
and Spike bring him here?"

For a moment I don't know what to do. I trust Giles, I've known him for 
three years and I know he's never lied to me. Can I trust him with Angel? 
But who else can help us, if not Giles? "Okay," I agree, for what other 
choice do I have?

Spike's POV:

When I arrive back at Willow's place, Angel is still asleep. I strip him out 
of the badly fitting clothing. I found some stuff that Angel left at the 
mansion. A pair of leather jeans and red crushed velvet shirt. It seams that 
Angel left Angelus' clothing when he moved to LA. I've also brought a 
couple of bags of blood for him. I even tried to bite some other humans, 
but I was totally unsuccessful. Whatever the fucking soldiers boys did to 
me it's left me totally incapable of hurt a single hair on a human's head. 
Fortunately, Willy didn't know that, and I managed to steal enough blood 
to keep both of us going for a few days.

When I've stripped Angel and admired the sight, I then take off my own 
clothing. It's been so bloody long since I've touched him... no wait; I've 
never touched Angel. I've fucked with Angelus, but I've never touched this 
soul-ed being. I wonder if he's going to be different in bed. I can't wait to 
find out. I climb onto the bed, and take Angel's head into my lap. With a 
quick morph into game face, I rip open a blood bag, open his mouth, and 
pour it inside. My fingers work his throat muscles and he swallows it 
down. When I'm on the second bag, Angel swallows voluntarily.

Angel's soft hair and gentle movements in my lap have totally undone me. 
By the third bag, I'm so damn aroused that I desperately want to touch 
him. The trouble is, I want to make love with him, not just shag. It's not 
because I've got this deep seated love for him - nah - I've heard it's better 
on Daytime TV - Honest! 

"Angel," I murmur, hoping frantically he's awake and feeling a whole 
*lot* better. When he doesn't answer, I open another blood bag and feed 
him the same way. When finished, I watch with growing desire as he licks 
his lips clean of the blood. His fine pink tongue darts out over lush lips, 
and well... I'm done for. Without even realizing, I attach my mouth to his, 
and he allows my tongue to dominate every corner of his mouth.

After long moments of heavy kissing, his hands gently push me away. 
"Spike..." he gasps.

"No! Please! Don't ask me to stop, Angel!" I beg. My mouth tries to seize 
his again, but he pulls out of my grasp. I reach for him desperately. I don't 
care how I look, or how I shouldn't be acting like this. I know it goes 
against my whole Big Bad image, but I need him. I feel as though if I don't 
touch him I'm going to expire, right here and right now!

"Spike, please..." he pushes me away, and I'm afraid he's going to say he 
doesn't want me. "Spike, I need to..." Angel breaks off, and breaks contact 
with my body. He pulls himself into a sitting position so we are face to 
face.

"Angel, if you're afraid of the curse, I don't think I could ever..."

"Yes, you would."

"Huh?" Those words really surprise me. I could give Angel a moment of 
true happiness? Me, a murdering, soulless demon that had him tortured 
just weeks ago? "But..." I stammer in a really unmanly voice.

"I want you too, Spike. I want to touch you so much it hurts." Angel gives 
me a sly grin, and bats those long dark lashes. Damn, he's so bloody 
gorgeous. "I just wanted to tell you about the vision I had before." 

"Oh, we shouldn't be together," I snivel.

"No! I saw us, together. I saw you making love to me, and it felt so right. I 
was totally and completely happy. I was whole, and I didn't lose my soul 
either." Angel's face is a mass of confusion and happiness. His facial 
expressions are really having a hard time dealing with adding the smiling 
bit. In fact, it's a little disconcerting seeing Angel - the soul - smile. I 
thought he could just look broody, and well... broody. "I just wanted you 
to know though... I don't want to err... sleep with you just because of the 
vision. I want to be with you... I want to...Humph!"

Doesn't he know there's a time to just shut up and go with it! I crush my 
mouth to his and kiss him with all the pent up passion I possess. My 
fingers clasp his arms, dragging him into my embrace. He feels weaker 
than I've experienced him to be, but he still hasn't recovered from being 
drained by the visions and me. It doesn't prevent Angel from responding to 
my passion. He slides his leg between mine and we kneel facing each 
other. I feel my shaft pressing against his thigh, and when I shift forward a 
little I touch his erect cock. I groan into our passionate kissing, and my 
arms grasp him tighter.

Truth be known, I've never kissed Angelus like this. I just lose myself in 
kissing Angel. Our tongues fight, caress, and map out each corner of our 
mouths. His teeth nip at me gently, and I nip back. Our lips crush, and 
press together, moving in a sensual dance. If I had to mark Angel on 
kissage - it would be 10 out of 10! When we finally break away from each 
other, our eyes open to gaze at bruised lips, and we laugh a little 
nervously. It's like a fervor has been awakened within us that I've never 
experienced before. I have to touch him. I have to be with him - in each 
and every way.

I grin at his lustful eyes and bruised lips. My hands slid down his arms, his 
waist, to rest on his buttocks. He returns my grin with a cocked eyebrow. I 
draw us both forwards, our legs locking together until we are chest to 
chest. Our erect shafts press into hard and trembling stomachs as our 
mouths clash. This time as we kiss our bodies rub together sensually, 
creating their own heat.

Something is happening here while we kiss. Something deep inside me. It 
feels as if Angel has ignited a fire that burns entrenched within my being. 
His touch burns my skin, and his mouth is the definition of bliss. I'm not 
sure if I like this. I'm becoming too lost in his embrace. I'm falling too 
quickly.

"O' Dia, Spike, m' ionúin" he groans. His hands clutching at my back and 
buttocks, holding me so close - my own clutching at his. "What are you 
doing to me?" he sighs into my mouth, "it burns."

With those simple words I know he's feeling what I am - the confusion, 
the need, the love, the burning. Never in my un-life I have ever felt this 
powerful a desire. Not even with Dru! I had always believed her to be my 
demon's mate.

"I wanna feel you, Angel!" I beg into his mouth. I don't know where the 
words come from. I'm not in control any more. It's a feeling I don't usually 
like, but it feels so fucking good that I never want it to end. It's like sex 
with Angel is going to burn me alive.

"Yes, Spike!" Angel cries back, his chest heaving with unrestrained 
passion. 

My sire rolls me over onto my back and looms above me. Our kisses 
become quick and desperate. His hands slide down my body and for the 
first time touch my cock. I yelp in absolute need. A totally desperate 
human sound, unbefitting a bad vampire. Suddenly however Angel's touch 
becomes light and he groans in pain from his earlier injuries. Without a 
word, I roll us again so he's under me, relaxed against the mattress. For a 
moment, he struggles to roll us over, but I still my licking his ear and 
throat.

"You can still touch me this way, Peaches," I breathe into his ear. Angel 
groans at the suggestion and returns to exploring my body. My own hands 
have better access here too, and I take full advantage of touching Angel. 
His large build body, fine muscles, athletic legs, and of course, his well 
hung cock. Any woman would be hard pushed matching Angel in beauty. 
I chuckle softly into his throat as I kiss his jugular.

"Finding this funny, Spike?" Angel asks as his hands caress my butt.

"Just thinking what you'd look like as a woman, luv," I laugh as I kiss his 
sublime lips.

"Oh, I'm thinking you're the woman of this operation, Spike," he answers 
slyly. His large hands pull me forward so his cock brushes up against my 
ass. 

My whole body shivers in anticipation and I can't find the words for a 
quick comeback. Instead, I push myself up until I'm squatting over his 
hips, and his large hands spread my cheeks. One thick finger wriggles its 
way inside my anus, and I give an effete moan. It has been nearly a 
century since anyone touched me there. The last man that did was 
Angelus, but I'm thinking Angel is going to feel different than that. I'm 
suddenly dragged from my reminiscing as two more fingers press inside 
me. He pistons them in and out as he stretches my tight hole.

"Spike," he groans, "we don't have any lube."

"You have blood, Angel," I pant.

I have shivers running down my spine from the look Angel gives me. He 
releases one hand from my body and brings his wrist to his mouth. He 
morphs into vampire features and I groan as my passion increases. His 
other fingers still continue their hard thrusting and I rock gently above 
him. I watch with wide eyes as Angel bites into his flesh and then covers 
his turgid length with his blood... My hands help him spread the viscous 
liquid over his hardening cock, my actions making Angel pant in response. 
We really need to be moving this along, or I'm going to come before he's 
even inside.

Angel's POV:

My beautiful Childe rocks above me, his whipcord body the most alluring 
sight I've ever witnessed. My three fingers piston in and out of his tight 
passage, and his body aches into my thrusting. I swear I'm going to come 
soon from just watching this sensual creature above me. My body aches 
from the injures, but the need to touch Spike overwhelms them all. I have 
to be inside him, I have to claim him as mine. The burning he creates 
inside me grows in intensity with each passing second. I know he feels the 
same - I can feel it and smell it. The deep love I have for him overflows, 
and I think I might die from this experience. 

Spike's long fine fingers help me spread the blood over my cock until I'm 
fully coated. The sight of the viscous red coating my aching cock and his 
fingers is arousing me even more. Without warning I grab his hips and 
drag him forward. Spike gives a little laugh at my desperate actions, and 
lifts himself up to help me. I remove my fingers from his clenching hole 
and I know he wants more. Wanting my cock to fill him. I have no idea 
what that feels like, for I've never been on Spike's end. One day I might 
allow him to touch me so.

"Bloody Hell!!" I screech using Spike's language as my devious Childe 
takes matters into his own hands. With one swift movement he's 
positioned my cock at his entrance and quickly slides down. I can't help 
but howl with the intense sensation. He's so bloody tight. He feels just as 
he did over a century ago, but I'm not Angelus and I won't hurt him like I 
did then.

"Don't go stealing my phrases, Peaches," Spike complains as I slide 
deeper.

I can't answer, I just growl back. My body bows off the bed, trying to 
thrust deeper, but Spike continues with his slow slide until I'm fully 
encased. With that eventuality we both growl deep in our throats. My 
bloodied hands clutch his hips, and leave red finger marks on his pale 
skin. Gods, even that alone is enough to send me moaning and trying to 
thrust up. Spike notices my reaction and starts pressing his own bloodied 
hands to my chest.

"You still like the blood sport, eh Peaches," he laughs seductively.

"Don't" pant... "call me" pant... "Peaches..." I cry as Spike squeezes his 
inner muscles tightly around my length. I'm being reduced to mush here, 
while Spike is happily in control. Well, I'm going to have to change this 
arrangement and quick. I bring my legs up behind him, pressing my feet to 
the mattress, which should give me some leverage. I test it out with one 
sharp thrust.

"Oh, Angel!" Spike moans, his body arching as I push up into his dark 
depths. "Again!" he begs.

Yep, I love it when he pleads with me. I thrust again, quicker this time. 
Which is followed by another, and another just as powerful. Soon my 
hands have to support Spike as he writhes on my rod. I believe I'm not the 
only one being reduced to mush here. All words vanish from our lips, and 
the only thought on my mind, is touching him deeper. I need to touch that 
spot inside him which will make all this worthwhile. I adjust my angle 
slightly and Spike howls in pleasure. His body arching, small pink nipples 
stand hard and proud upon his smooth chest. I lean up and take one into 
my mouth sucking hard, making the peaks like granite.

"Angel!" he screams. I know he's close to coming, because so am I. This 
intense pleasure is burning me alive, and I know I'm going to cum in a 
couple of seconds. My cock throbs with the need to fill my Childe, and I 
yearn to be covered with Spike's climax. I want to smell of him, just as 
he'll smell of me. My bloodied hand grabs hold of his hard, dripping 
length and I pump him roughly. Spike continues to squirm, pant, writhe 
and thrust against me with impassioned desperation. Soon I join in, and 
our movements become one great blur.

"Spike!" I howl, coming first and filling his raw passage. I'm shocked as 
strong arms grab me and pull me up into a sitting position. Spike drags my 
mouth to his throat and holds me there. I hadn't expected him to want me 
to bite. It's a sign of trust between vampires - biting during sex. I grab his 
knobbly shoulders and dive for his vein. My teeth tear his flesh open and I 
drink him down. In just seconds, I feel Spike do the same to my own 
throat, and my blood fills his mouth.

"Angel," Spike groans, the sound muffled by having his fangs buried in 
my skin. His cool seed covers my chest, and I moan as another wave of 
love and need washes over me. I feel my cock hardening again, still buried 
deep inside my boy. I don't move, however, and slowly withdraw my 
fangs from his neck. Spike also releases me, and collapses into my 
embrace. My arms wrap around him and we rock together.

"Bloody hell, Peaches! What the hell was that?"

"Love, my boy," I answer as I muzzle his hair.

"OH GODDESS!" a feminine voice screeches from the doorway.

Willow's POV:

Arghh! Two naked men are fucking in my parents' bed. Two gorgeous 
naked men... No! Parents' bed remember! Oh my... what am I going to do? 
Wow, Angel looks so damn... and Spike... No! Angry - I have got to 
remember that part!!

"Angel!" I yell again. My entire body trembles with rage... or is it desire. 
"What..." 

What the Hell! Oh, I give up! I'm too tired to fight. I want to feel 
something more than the loneliness that Oz left me with. I want to give up 
to the fire I feel when I'm with Angel. A fire that burned as soon as I saw 
him.

"Err... Willow what are you doing?" Angel chokes. Spike turns his head 
and gives me a sly smirk. 

"Guess she felt it too, Sire," he murmurs to Angel, kissing his straight 
nose.

"What are you talking about?" asks Angel in alarm. 

"The burning," I answer. I think I understand now. The need I feel for 
Angel - the need I felt earlier when I said goodbye. I experienced a wave 
of love and desire for him then. I feel it now. I shouldn't act on it. I'm still 
getting over Oz, but the truth is I want to feel something more than misery. 
I want life, love and everything that's supposed to go with it. That's why 
I'm doing this. That's why I'm slowly undressing, throwing my unwanted 
clothing onto the floor and advancing towards the naked vampires.

"Did you have a vision about Willow?" Spike asks Angel.

"Err... maybe," admits Angel shyly. His eyes are wide; staring at me while 
I undress, then climb onto the bed. Spike gracefully lifts himself off 
Angel's hips, and his Sire's long wet cock slips out of Spike's hole with a 
little pop.

"What did you see, Angel?" I ask. I move over him and take his hard 
length into my small hands. He moans, chewing on his bottom lip as I 
stroke him. Wow, he's so much bigger than Oz. Spike moves to Angel's 
side, licking his lips as I touch his Sire's cock.

"You and me, together..." he pants, "we gave each other comfort and a 
feeling of wholeness."

"The three, who are one," I say without thinking.

"What?" Angel pants under my stimulation. It's amazing I can get a 240 
odd years old vampire panting under me. Still, I think the burning we all 
are feeling effects Angel more. I'm drawn to him like a moth to a flame. 
Maybe that's why he had the vision of me, why they both came to me. I 
am the third. We aren't connected to each other, but to Angel.

"I feel it Angel, the burning for you. I think Spike felt it too, it pushed 
aside all his past issues to be with you."

"Hey, no magic can make me do anything pet, just remember that!" 
complains Spike. I smile as he moves around Angel and pulls him into his 
lap. Angel's back is pressed to his chest and Spike wraps his arms around 
him to gently pull on his nipples.

"This isn't magic - it's destiny," I proclaim. How I know - I haven't a clue. 
The words just appear on my tongue and I hear myself speak them. Still, I 
don't want to think any longer. I just need to touch Angel. I lean over him 
and kiss his lips, receiving a low snarl from Spike who watches me 
carefully over Angel' shoulder.

I forget about everything as I kiss Angel. His mouth is so cool and his 
tongue so talented. His tongue sweeps inside my mouth, and I position 
myself over his body. His huge cock prods at my core and his hands grab 
my hips. With a gentle touch he guides me down.

"Oh... Angel..." I breathe as his girth stretches me wide. It stings slightly 
as he slides deeper and then deeper still. Finally, after what feels like 
forever, my clit is pressed against his pubis. I shiver at the sensation of this 
grown man inside me. A man who must have had thousands of women 
and men in his time. A man who I'll kill if he touches another - well, apart 
from Spike, whom strangely doesn't arouse any feeling of jealousy within 
me. The thought surprises me - when did I become possessive of Angel? I 
mean, he's Buffy' ex-boyfriend! I shouldn't be here having sex with him!

"Willow; stop thinking," Angel murmurs as he starts to thrust deep into 
my body. His strong hands lift my hips and then slams me down with 
increasing force. Oz was never this strong to lift me bodily as Angel does. 
While he controls the trusting, I squeeze my channel around him. Angel 
gives a deep groan and immediately transforms into "Grrr" face. I thought 
the sight would scare me but it doesn't, in fact it's a turn on. His large 
golden eyes stare into mine and I lose myself in their depths.

Soon all sensation reduces down to one person - Angel. I feel his cock fill 
me, creating the most wonderful friction. The force of his thrust drives his 
pubic bone directly into my clit, driving me higher and higher into a 
momentous orgasm. I start to cry out, un-intelligent words and sounds as 
he continues to move. Strong, hard hands grip my hips, and suddenly I 
can't hold back anymore. I scream into my climax as Angel continues to 
pound inside me. I clench around him almost painfully, but the blissful 
thrusting continues.

"More... More..." I scream. With one swift movement, Angel rolls us over 
until I'm lying under him. His weight pushes me into the mattress and I 
wrap my legs around his waist. He continues thrusting in and out. He 
holds himself up with his elbows beside Spike's legs, and my head rests 
into his lap. Angel bends his head slightly and takes my right nipple into 
his mouth. I scream out my pleasure as my hands grip him to me. I'm 
dimly aware of Spike caressing Angel's head and shoulders. His hands 
constantly touching the one person that binds us all together.

"Yes," I yell as another orgasm rips through my body. My eyes squeeze 
shut as the sensations crash through my nervous system and still Angel 
continues to pump away. Oh goddess, if anyone told me vampires can last 
this long, I'd never have human. 

"More!" I screech, and both vampires laugh. 

Suddenly Angel's thrusting slows and he changes his position. He slides 
forward, so his arms cup my shoulders and his body falls flat against mine.

"Angel, No!" I complain. I don't want him to stop!

"Stretch your legs out, Willow, straight against mine," he whispers into 
my ear.

I don't question, I just do. Our position changes and I swear he gets 
deeper. His cock changes angle, and oh... wow! Angel stars to rock against 
me instead of thrusting, rubbing directly over my clit. 

"Oh... oh... oh...yessss..." I moan. My hands grab his arms as my nails dig 
into his skin. I spread my inner thighs and the pressure increases. 
Wrapping my ankles around his calves makes it even better. The violence 
of our movements has gone, even though our rocking is frantic, it's also 
deep and sensual. It's like this isn't sex - it's lovemaking. I start to cry.

"Shhh... Willow," he soothes, his mouth finding mine and we kiss 
tenderly. This can't last for long, the sensation of his cock and my own 
core so tightly pressed together is mind-blowing. Within moments I'm 
coming again and I break away from Angel's mouth. That's not what I 
want. I need desperately to bite him. Why - I have no idea! My mouth 
finds his neck and my human teeth bite into his pale skin.

"Fuck!" Angel screams. I've never heard him swear before, and he fills my 
passage with his cool sperm as he jerks against me. Moments later, I'm 
crashing into another orgasm, and I drag his head to my own throat. Long, 
sharp, fanged teeth sink into soft flesh and he drinks me down while I fall 
into oblivion.

When I come to, my eyes refocus and I'm surprised to taste blood in my 
mouth. "Angel," I ask, concerned.

"Hmmm," he answers.

"Is it bad that I just bit you?"

"What!?" Angel suddenly pulls away from resting on my body and looks 
down into my eyes. His hand touches his throat and it comes away 
bloodied. "You re-opened Spike's bite," he murmurs, his wide, concerned 
eyes suddenly finding mine.

*Ring, ring* The phone screeches its high-pitched tone not far from my 
head, making all three of us almost jump out of our skins. I wriggle out 
from under Angel and snatch it up. I watch with wide eyes as Spike 
pushes Angel over onto his back, and starts kissing and stroking his chest. 
I'd forgotten Spike was there in the end. He's really quite beautiful, not as 
big as Angel, but just as well sculptured in form. He kisses Angel's mouth, 
then moves down his body, I assume working his way down to his cock. 
Goddess, I could watch them forever...

"Hello... Willow? Is anyone there? Willow!"

"What... Oh, Giles, it's you... What are you doing on the phone? Oh, wait... 
Oh!" Spike's just taken Angel's cock into his mouth and starts licking 
away my wetness. "Ohhh..." I moan completely oblivious to Giles on the 
other end of the line.

"Willow! If I didn't know better I'd say you had been drinking... 
Willow!!!"

"Oh! Giles. Giles, I'm so sorry, err... something was on the telly, you know 
a Wildlife program, and then there were these panthers... really big... with 
big, big tongues, and..." Oh goddess, I'm babbling to Giles while Spike 
and Angel are getting it on. I'll never be able to look him in the eye again!

"Willow!" he yells.

"Yes, Giles," I reply, almost like a soldier.

"Willow, you really have to come over here and bring Angel with you. It's 
very urgent... Are you listening, Willow?"

"Yes, we'll bring Angel off... I mean over, okay?" Wow, how does Spike 
do that without gagging?

"I've found a prophecy in the Codex; I'd completely over looked it because 
I never thought I would have anything to do with another Champion for 
the Powers. It says here a Champion shall fall into the darkness, and two 
shall be his saviors, without them he is lost inside insanity, and together 
they shall become a force to be reckoned with. The only trouble is that the 
initial binding between the three can be quite traumatic, with the risk of 
death to all three. You have to bring Angel here, and so we can find the 
two who will help him. We also need to find out if it's wise to proceed 
with this bonding, whatever that means.... Are you listening to me, 
Willow!" Giles shouts.

"Yes! I'll bring Angel off, and then come right over," I reply without even 
thinking what I'm saying. I couldn't have said I'd bring Angel off, did I? 
It's best just to end this conversation and now! "Bye, Giles," I shout back 
as I slam the phone down.

"Getting you flustered?" Spike mumbles around Angel' length.

I glare back at him as he starts to caress Angel's balls. Our poor vampire is 
writhing on the bed, pleasure lancing through his body, his hips jerking 
and his eyes squeezed shut. Angel' mouth opens as he pants with his rising 
orgasm. Oh well, better make the most of it. I dive across the bed and 
attach my mouth to Angel's. His body arches in surprise, then he wraps his 
arms around me, and presses me to his chest. After a minute or two of 
intense kissing, Angel breaks away and roars as he cums filling Spike' 
mouth.

"What the hell is happening?" Angel yells.

Angel's POV:

We arrive at Giles not long after... err... No... Start again... It was still light 
and we walked to Giles via underground tunnels. Unfortunately, Giles 
doesn't have an access near him so Spike and myself had to run under a 
blanket to reach his front door.

"Giles!" yells Willow as she pounds on the door, "Giles, open up quick!"

The door is flung open, and there stands Buffy. I skid to a halt before 
them, and Spike moves himself to stand covering me. My whole body 
trembles with unreasonable fear. I don't understand why I feel like this 
around Buffy. I mean, I loved her, I still love her in many ways. I just can't 
trust her! 

"Willow, what... Spike!" she yells as she notices Spike and I standing not 
far from the door, under a blanket.

"Slayer, let us in!" he cries. "I'm bloody parboiling out here!"

"Want me to make it quicker," she whips back, grabbing up her stake. The 
vision I had earlier flashes through my eyes, and I whimper softly. I 
pictured Buffy staking Spike, his fine ashes blowing over my fingers as I 
tried to save him. I let out a huge sob, and instantly Willow is by my side.

"Buffy, invite us in," she cries, and brings me nearer.

"Angel..." Buffy whispers, her jaw dropping open in surprised shock. 
"Err... come in!" she cries, grabbing hold of my arm and pulling me in.

As soon as we're inside I fling myself away from Buffy. Her touch burns 
me, and the visions threaten to break loose again. I collapse to the floor, as 
my body trembles in fear. I can't control these reactions; I can't fight the 
emotions the visions leave within. I feel like they are literally ripping me 
apart, and I can't hold myself together. 

"Will..." I whimper, my body convulses more violently.

*Guns... man... pain... Boy-child with brown hair ripped to shreds... 
woman in lab coat, cutting of an arm with a long spike ... man screaming 
in agony, as he's gorged by human hands... blond hair... man with gun... 
Spike - a stake in his chest... ashes...*

"Noooo!" I scream, clutching my head, "No... no more... I can't 
understand.... no more... Please...No!"

Spike's POV:

My Sire is overtaken by another vision as he curls upon the floor, begging 
for it to end. The demon in me howls to finish my Sire's suffering. To do 
anything to terminate his pain, and to stop him degrading me like this. 
Degrading because it's not fit for a vampire to act as so. Yet, I cannot 
harm him, I want to comfort him, hold him and take his suffering away. A 
pain I can feel on the edges of my mind. 

"Angel," Buffy cries as she crouches beside him, trying desperately to 
catch his flailing arms. 

"Sire," I shout, pushing the Slayer aside and taking him into *my* arms. I 
fall to the floor, and enfold him into a tight embrace. We rock together, 
and he mumbles incoherently as I hold him tight. In the next moment, 
Willow is down beside us. Her arms encircle around Angel, and she 
brushes his hair from his eyes . I should be feeling jealous of her. I feel an 
emotion for Angel so powerful that it's all consuming. A gut-feeling - a 
knowledge - that he's mine and I'm his. Yet, I don't feel jealousy towards 
Willow. I did with Drusilla and Angelus; I never liked sharing either one 
of them. But I don't feel it here. Willow is a part of him... yet, I cannot 
explain how I know this.

"Angel, it's okay, you're safe..." Willow coos into his ear. 

Her hands run over his face and chest while I continue to hold him tight. 
She leans over us and slowly kisses Angel's lips. Not to be out done, I turn 
his face and kiss him too. His lips feel so soft and welcoming, that even 
though he's in pain, I'm becoming more and more aroused with each 
passing second. I want to touch him and take his suffering into myself. I 
think I'm going to agree with Angel earlier. When we all lay in bed and he 
asked: "what the hell is happening?" I'm wondering about that myself. 
Where did my hatred for Angel go? When did my need for revenge 
dissipate? In truth, deep down, I think I know the answer to that. My 
hatred died when Angel said - I love you. At that second, I received what I 
had always wanted - and needed - whether it was from Drusilla, or 
Angelus: love.

"What are you doing?" yells Buffy, standing up again and staring down at 
us embracing Angel.

"Buffy, I found peas..." Suddenly, a voice from the door makes us all look 
round. In the doorway stands Giles with a huge bag of groceries and a 
packet of frozen peas in his hand.

"Willow! Angel!" he cries looking down, and suddenly a flash of 
recognition flashes over his face.

"Oh, bloody hell, the three!"


"Giles, will you please speak English!" screams Buffy. I can tell she's 
getting more flustered and confused by the second. 

Giles closes the door behind him and dumps the groceries in Buffy's arms. 
"Angel has had another vision?" he asks Willow and I.

"Yeah, just now when he saw Buffy," answers Willow. 

"What are you talking about? What visions? And why are you both kissing 
Angel?" Buffy finally screeches.

"I think we'd better get Angel on the couch," Giles instructs us, completely 
ignoring his Slayer's outburst.

Giles, Willow and I pull Angel up and over to the couch. All the while 
Buffy watches us with shocked eyes. I smile at her as I climb onto the sofa 
behind Angel, and pull him into my embrace wrapping my arms tightly 
around his broad chest. Gently, I start to purr into his ear, my body 
vibrating with the soft sound. With that soothing, totally vampire sound, 
Angel starts to calm, and the convulsions lessen. He curls into my arms, 
and buries his face into my chest, breathing softly. It's a little quirk of his; 
breathing when he's upset. I thread my fingers through his dark hair, and 
kiss his forehead. All this while being watched by an overly jealous 
Vampire Slayer. A slayer that can't lay a finger on me, without going 
through Willow, Giles and Angel. I feel like sticking my tongue out, but I 
might be pushing it then. Instead, I continue to comfort my Angel.

"Spike..." Willow hisses into my ear. She knows what I'm doing.

Suddenly, a burst of frozen peas covers us all as Buffy's hand squeezed the 
bag too tightly. She drops the bag of groceries too, and they scatter across 
the floor as she storms towards me.

"What have you done to him?" she hollers into my face. Her hand 
searching for the stake she usually keeps in her waistband.

"Buffy please, you need to calm down. Then I shall explain everything." 
Giles takes her by the arm, and his calming voice stills her. 

Okay, I just can't hold it back. I stick my tongue out at her and then I lick 
Angel's cheek. Well, she howls in anger and storms over to me again. 
What the... ?

Suddenly, there is a flash of bright white light and Buffy is thrown across 
the room. Willow stands protectively before us.

"Oh goddess," she yells when the danger has past, "Buffy, I didn't mean..." 
She runs over to her friend and helps Buffy to her feet. The Slayer is 
crying!

"Willow, why are you hurting me like this? Why are you with Angel? 
Why doesn't he want me?" she wails.

"It's not Willow's fault," Giles answers, calmly stepping forward and 
taking Buffy's arm. "Please all of you just sit down and I'll tell you what 
I've discovered."

"Will!" Angel's voice breaks the silence, and I hold him tighter.

"I'm here, Sire," I reassure him.

"Are you real?" he whimpers, his trembling fingers touching my face. "I 
don't know what's real... I'm afraid."

"It's okay," I murmur into his ear, kissing it gently. I fight the sudden 
feeling of tears that sting my eyes. Gods, I'm being reduced to tears in 
front of the bloody Slayer and friends. What the hell is happening to me? 
"I'm real, and you don't need to be afraid." I stroke his hair back, kissing 
his forehead and he settles against me.

"Yes, well... now that Angel's back with us, I'll explain," Giles being 
uncomfortable with staring at Angel and me. I think he forgets that we're 
both vampires, and gender has very little importance to us. Then again, I 
would never put Giles down as being homophobic. I think Buffy is by the 
continuing look of disgust on her face. I wonder what she would think if I 
told her Willow had the hots for another girl?

"No!" interrupts Buffy. "First, you tell me why I can't kill Spike this 
instant. He's evil! He's tried to kill me... us more than once. How can you 
all trust him with Angel? He hates Angel!"

"I never said I... Okay, I did say it but you know what they say - there's a 
fine line between love and hate," I laugh at the filthy look she gives me.

"Spike, has trouble performing," Willow proclaims.

"Hey! I have no such thing! You caught me with Angel, you know I don't 
have trouble per..."

"Spike! I meant the other thing!" Willow screams back.

"Oh, the biting. Yeah, she's right, the commando boys caught me and 
they've done me for good." 

"What are you saying?" asks Buffy, giving us all a blank look. 

Bloody hell, is she thick or something? I just said I can't bite anyone. "I'm 
saying that Spike had a little trip to the vet, and now he doesn't chase the 
other puppies anymore. I can't bite anything. I can't even hit people!"

"So what, you haven't murdered anybody lately, so let's all trust you? I 
don't think so."

"Yeah well, I'm not here for you. I'll kill you if I can Slayer, but as you can 
see I'm here for Angel and he trusts me." I grin at her and pull Angel 
closer, who conveniently snuggles into my embrace.

"Grrr," she growls back. She can give a damn good impression of a rabid 
vampire.

"Spike, stop it!" Willow yells at me, and gently takes Buffy by the arm. 
She guides her to a chair and sits her down.

"Look, we are all going to discuss this like grown ups and mature adults," 
Willow prelates, and then takes a seat next to Buffy.

We all look over to Giles. Well, not Angel because he's busy wrapping 
himself around my body, and purring into my chest. Giles cleans his 
glasses, and replaces them again. We all know it's time for him to speak.

Willow's POV:

"Right," Giles says as he takes a deep breath. "Basically Buffy, Angel is a 
Warrior for the Powers that Be, much like yourself. He fights for the 
Powers that Be. He had a seer to help him fight evil, just as you have a 
watcher." Buffy rolls her eyes, not understanding any of it yet. "Well, 
Angel's seer recently died, and with his death he passed the visions to 
Angel. Whom you have just seen experience one."

"You mean Angel can see the future, oh wow!" she cries, "Now he can..."

Giles interrupts her commentary: "Actually it isn't a good thing. Angel 
now possesses two links to the Powers that Be. In a sense he is like an 
Oracle and constantly receiving messages directly from the Powers."

"You mean Angel is something like... holy," blurts out Spike. He laughs, 
"Well, Angelus always did love corrupting the pure..." I don't get the 
inside joke and give him a good stare. He shuts up. It surprises me how I 
can make him do things. 

"Yes, well. For a normal human they could deal with it. Angel can't. He's a 
vampire and the demon within is constantly battling against this power. It 
is innately good, while Angel's demon is innately evil. Therefore they 
cannot co-exist. In the end, the visions shall drive him insane."

"How do we get rid of the visions," I ask, my voice surprisingly strong 
even though I'm trembling inside.

"We can't. Only with death can the visions be passed on to another," Giles 
confirms sadly, "Now back to Angel, while checking out the Codex, I 
discovered a prophecy that I never really took much notice of. It has to do 
with the Powers' second warrior and at the time I never knew it was 
Angel. It says that the Champion shall fall into darkness, and there shall be 
two to save him. One will give him strength to carry on fighting. The other 
shall give him love, companionship and mental strength to combat his pain 
and confusion. Now the prophecy gets a little confusing here, it says 
something about the three having to share body or something. It says 
"fuil" - now I'm not up on my Gaelic so...

"Blood..." whispers Angel from his place in Spike's arms. "They have to 
share blood - fuil."

"No... oh no..." I murmur.

"Willow, you know something..."

"I understand the prophecy," I answer softly.

"Well, so do I," Buffy interrupts. "I gave Angel my blood once, that means 
that I am one of the three..."

"No, you're not." Oh goddess, how can I tell her this? The prophecy has 
already come to past. "I'm the third. Spike is the second."

"No, that's not right. Angel and I... we're together..." Buffy stares at me 
with shocked, tear filled eyes. I hate hurting her. I hate having to say this, 
but we have to help Angel and that's more important. I think I love him... I 
think I was always meant to love him. I shall fight for him.

"We... I... Well... something happened," I tell Giles. Goddess, this is so 
embarrassing. I stare at Angel and tell them in one big sentence, 
"SpikeandAngelhadsexandsodidAngelandI" breath, 
"weexchangedblooditwasn'tintentionalitjusthappenedandIwantedtotouch...
"

"Willow, take a breath!" shouts Giles. 

I look over at Buffy to see her just sitting there staring at Angel. There is 
no emotion on her face, just a cold stony look. Oh dear, that's even worse 
than her anger.

"Look, what the chit," I glare at Spike, "err, Willow says is right. I had sex 
with Angel; we reclaimed each other and shared blood. Then Willow 
comes along, feeling the same heat we do, and she and the poof shagged, 
at the end she had a good nibble over my bite, and they consequently 
shared blood. All of you following this?"

"Angel, Spike and you are the three," Buffy restates unbelievingly.

"Yes." I answer. What can I say to her to stop the pain? I know what it 
feels like to feel betrayed by love. Look at Oz and me. I was ready to curse 
him when I found out about him and that foot disease girl. Oh dear, that 
isn't good. I think I might be making an enemy out of the Vampire Slayer - 
a girl 10 times stronger than me.

"So who's what then," Spike speaks up. "Am I his strength and Willow his 
seer guide?"

"I don't know," answers Giles rubbing his glasses. "When I came in, Angel 
have a vision, right?"

"Yep as soon as he saw Slutty over there." 

"Did either of you feel it?"

"I didn't," I answer. "I felt him weaken. I needed to protect him, but that's 
all." 

"Oh shit," mumbles Spike, "I'm the companion and stuff... No way! I'm 
the Big Bad, I kill things. I am not a nursemaid!" he screeches.

"Spike..." moans Angel from his place on Spike's chest.

"Shhh... It's okay, pet." Spike runs his hands over Angel's face and back, 
calming him again. "I'm here... oh bugger!" Spike hits himself around the 
head. "I'm turning into a bloody poof!"

"No, Spike," Giles can't help but grin as he speaks. "You will just feel 
protective around Angel because you will be able to sense his visions, and 
when he needs you. You are what grounds him into the present. To 
everyone else you can carry on being your vulgar self."

"Hee hee, I'm back!" Spike morphs into game face, and growls at Giles 
and Buffy.

"Spike, give over!" I command.

"You, Willow, are also feeling the bond. You are Angel's strength. I can 
assume that it will make you physically stronger, you will sense Angel's 
weakness and needs. You are already commanding around him, and 
protective of him with anyone that might come too close."

"I am?" I ask incredulously. Then I remember what I did to Buffy when 
she got too close. I never used my power like that before. There is an 
overwhelming feeling of jealousy if anyone comes near Angel. I can't 
stand the thought of another woman touching him, especially Buffy. Of 
course, Buffy and he were once lovers, and she still believes him to be her 
true love - her soul mate. I'm jealous of his feelings for her, even though 
deep down I know he'll always love her, but he's not *in* love with her. 
He's in *love* with Spike. Who is a man, so I can deal with that.

"So, what was Angel's vision?" Buffy suddenly speaks. She doesn't look at 
me but directly at Giles. I can almost taste her hostility towards me and 
Spike.

"Oh, good grief! We totally forgot, it might be important." Giles turns to 
Angel, and is about to touch him when Spike snarls. He backs off 
immediately.

"Angel-luv," Spike whispers into Angel's ear. He strokes his Sire's back 
gently, trying to keep him calm. "Can you tell me about the vision, pet. 
What did you see?"

My heart breaks as Angel lifts his head from Spike's chest. His eyes are 
bloodshot, and he's so pale and weak. The pain is visible on his face.

"I can't... please, Spike... I can't go back there... Please... no more..."

"Angel, you have to tell us," I order. My voice is full of authority and it 
makes me shiver with how cruel and heartless I sound. Yet, I feel as 
though he has to tell. He needs to share the pain of the visions with us. 
Otherwise, we can't heal it. I walk over and kneel beside my lover. I touch 
his face and he presses into my touch. I hate seeing Angel like this. He 
was always so strong, so big and protective. Now he can't even care for 
himself, he's broken by visions that he can't control. Thank the gods that 
he came to us. On his own, who knows what would have happened?

"I promise to make you feel better," Spike murmurs into Angel's ear. He 
runs his hands seductively down Angel's back, finally gripping his ass. 
Damn, he looks so fuck-able in leather. Bad Willow! Spike presses his 
lower body into Angel's hips and he moans softly. Buffy gives a loud huff 
and collects her groceries. I can't tell what she's thinking or feeling. I used 
to be able to understand her, she is... was my best friend, now I can't reach 
her. She's becoming so distant from me. She' no longer the Buffy I knew.

"Guns," Angel starts, his voice dragging my attention from Buffy. "It was 
those commando men and they were chasing something. A big human, but 
he wasn't. He'd been changed, that woman who... who touched me... she 
was there... she was replacing his body with demon parts... then he started 
ripping everyone apart! Blood everywhere! So much anger!" Angel's voice 
rises and increases, until he's sobbing and crying out about what he saw.

"Shhh, Angel," Spike comforts, pressing his body firmly against the other 
vampire's.

"Was there anymore, Angel?" asks Giles, who's taking notes. I'm so 
thankful that we have at least one person we cane turn to. With Giles' 
guidance, we might get through this.

"I don't... don't understand them..." Angel sobs in Spike's arms. His body 
trembles from re-living the vision again. I can't imagine what it must feel 
like. Does he experience what these people feel? Does he see everything 
from their eyes? Does he feel the pain of evil's actions?

"Will!" Angel suddenly screams, "Priests are coming... they hurt... Holtz 
burning me... hurts... hurts... save me... please... please, Will!"

"Angel, it's okay! I have you!" Spike gently rocks his crazed Sire.

"I believe that was the demon inside that is fighting against the visions," 
says Giles quietly to me, making more notes.

I shiver as I look into glazed and terrified eyes. I believe that Angel 
doesn't see us after the visions, just images of his past and the aftermath of 
the terror he witnesses.

"What do you mean? Angelus is doing that to Angel?" I question, shocked 
by the revelation.

"Yes, he's dredging up their past, confusing Angel about what he is 
witnessing in the visions. Soon Angel might not be able to tell the 
difference between what's real and not. He won't know what's happening, 
going to happen, and what has already past."

"Well, I'll just start cooking dinner while you think about this. You three 
staying?" Buffy asks us cheerfully from the kitchen.

"Yeah... sure." I mumble in surprise. 

I observe her for a moment while Giles and Spike talk between 
themselves. Something has happened to her. In the last few seconds she's 
changed. How - I can't tell. I'm sure she's planning something.

"Buffy, are you okay?" I ask walking over to the kitchen area. She smiles 
and continues putting the food out. "I'm really sorry about everything that 
happened. I never meant to hurt you, it just... something made me, us... I'm 
just really sorry." I finish. To say something forced me to have sex with 
Angel would be lying. I could have stopped it, but I didn't want to. I 
wanted to touch him; I wanted to feel desired and loved. I feel whole, like 
I've never felt before. It is just like Angel said before - we are joined. We 
touched each other and felt whole - complete. Like we are the missing 
pieces to something... Well, I'm not really sure what we are. What are the 
'three'. But even though I have these questions, I never want that to change 
- not even for Buffy's sake.

"Willow, I understand I really do. I know you weren't hurting me on 
purpose. I was wrong to get angry. Angel and me, well, we aren't together 
anymore. He's moved on and so should I. It was just a shock, Okay? 
Forgive me?" she gives me that smile that always melts my heart. I hug 
her, and she embraces me back. But for some reason it feels strange. 
Almost like it's forced. I don't know if it's on my part or hers.

Angel's POV:

The vision earlier has left me weak and restless. I've told Giles and Spike 
that it didn't feel urgent and those events were not happening now. In fact, 
they feel months away... Spike agrees with the assessment and says he 
feels no sense of urgency either. I still get flashes of the vision, but also 
another one. One very different to the first. This time with priests in red 
clothing, I discern a sewer and I'm running through it. Another moment, 
I'm in some large underground cavern, where a man whose name I know 
is Holtz starts to torture me. I can't tell if this is real or not. Did it happen 
or will it happen? Past, future and present are becoming a huge blur to me. 
The only thing I'm sure of is the presence of Spike, m' ionúin (my 
beloved) and Willow, mo cumhacht (my strength). When they talk to me I 
know they are real. I know that they shall protect me. They are the only 
people that ground me into the present.

"Burning..." I suddenly mumble into Spike's chest. 

"Slayer, something's burning," Spike shouts out at the slay... Buffy.

"Angel, did you have another vision?" asks Giles, his interested peeking.

"Nah, we can smell it." Spike answers, with a sly grin. 

I snuggle deeper into Spike's embrace wanting to never move. I desire to 
be here forever. With him is the only place I've felt safe since I received 
the visions - well, maybe even longer than that. I never blamed him for 
torturing me. If I was evil and wanted the ring, I would have done much 
worse. So I do understand, after all he is my Childe, and I did teach him 
that. It is strange how he can accept me so easily and quickly. Then again 
after our experience with the Initiative he might need someone to hold on 
to. I get the feeling sometimes that he experienced more than he lets on. 
That he can remember what they did to him - whatever it is that stops him 
from biting or harming humans.

"I hope you're all hungry," Buffy shouts from the kitchen, "there's enough 
here to feed an army."

"Oh, that reminds me," Giles says, "I brought some blood while I was out, 
for you and Spike."

"Thank you, Giles," I answer. I smile lightly and attempt to rise. My 
muscles tremble with the strain and in the end both Giles and Spike help 
me stand. Giles' touch alights more flashes of visions inside my mind, but 
I push them away. Spike gives me a curious look, but doesn't say 
anything. I wonder if he felt that? If he knows whenever I get a glimpse of 
a vision?

"Xander... door..." I mumble. In the vision, I glimpsed at Xander and a 
blond haired woman coming towards Giles' home. Spike smiles at me. I 
don't know why.

"Don't fight the visions, luv," he whispers while Giles answers the door.

"You know when I have them?" I ask back, in a vampire soft voice.

"I feel them on the edge of my mind. Kind of like an itch I can't scratch. I 
don't know what you see, but I know when they come. You can't fight 
them, Angel. Try and accept them, maybe they won't hurt as much." Spike 
soft fingers stroke my cheek and I lean into his touch. I don't know how to 
do what he says. It's like my whole body and mind rebels against the 
visions, causing me pain and suffering.

"Okay," I reply. I feel suddenly warm as he flashes a glaringly bright 
smile at me. I wish I could kiss him, here and now.

"Deadboy!" Xander cries upon noticing me. "And Deadboy junior. 
Shouldn't Buffy be around staking you now? Wait a minute... what are you 
and Spike doing together... and in leather! Quickly Giles, a stake."

"Angel isn't evil, Spike can't bite you," Giles answers calmly and takes his 
jacket.

"Huh?" Xander looks at the three of us with surprise.

"Hi, I'm Anya, and wow! You two are really cute!" A leggy blond enters 
behind Xander and immediately comes over to shake my hand. I back 
away. Giles touched me before and it set off another vision, I won't risk it 
again.

"Are you sure he isn't evil?" Xander whispers to Giles.

"I'm not evil again! Why does everyone think that?" I retort back. I step 
away from Anya, and Xander takes her arm to lead her away from me. "I 
haven't been evil for a long time."

"Yes, dear," Spike grins and pats my arm. I growl at him.

"So everyone ready for dinner," Buffy calls from the kitchen. She walks in 
carrying an unnaturally large sized turkey, followed by Willow with roast 
potatoes and peas. Willow gives me a gentle smile as she passes. 

"Come on, gather round, we're all friends... well, kinda friends here." She 
gives me, Spike and Willow a strange look. I shiver remembering the 
visions of Buffy from before. The problem is I don't know what it is that 
makes me afraid. They really weren't specific about what she'll do. 

Everyone stands nervously around the table. No one is comfortable with 
each other, and we all have our little unspoken anxieties and fears. Finally, 
Giles and Willow take matters into their own hands and guides us to the 
table. Willow sits Spike and me next to each other making a space for 
herself on my right. Then, Giles gives Buffy a seat at the head of the table, 
while he takes the opposite end; Xander and Anya sit facing us.

For a long moment we sit in silence. Willow goes off and brings Spike and 
myself a mug of warmed blood. She reseats herself next to me. She gently 
takes my hand and smiles encouragingly. Xander and Buffy both give us 
an evil glare, but say nothing. 

"So Slayer, you kill your own turkey?" Spike enquires breaking the 
silence. "Just to make sure, you didn't stake it did you? Because I would 
hate to find a stake left in there."

"I think the turkey looks wonderful, Buffy," Giles interrupts before Spike 
can say anything more.

"Yeah, can't wait to taste it," Xander grins, holding his plate out for Buffy 
to give him a slice.

Soon everyone starts eating - in silence. Spike and myself drink our blood, 
while everyone but Willow turns away in disgust. It's strange that I feel 
comfortable drinking it with Willow, she seems to accept all our vampire 
needs. She doesn't act afraid of me in any way. Unlike Buffy who was 
never able to accept that under the soul, I am still a vampire. I missed 
being that. I have the urges of a vampire, and being with Spike makes me 
able to act some of that out. Okay, I'm just talking about the sex at the 
moment. I miss vampire sex. I miss the blood and the biting, the near 
impossibility of hurting his vampire body. 

"Enjoying it, Peaches," Spike leans over and grins at me. I shiver at his 
suggestive manner, I don't think he was speaking of the blood. Oh damn, I 
hope he can't read my mind. I suddenly think about Spike naked and tied 
to the bed, writhing as I suck him off. Spike gives me a luscious grin, over 
his mug of blood and licks his lips clean. His eyes drop down into my lap, 
and the grin becomes wider. Damn, I think he can smell me. Beside me 
Willow elbows me in the ribs and I draw my attention away from Spike. I 
think everyone noticed me staring at him, as he gave my groin an eyeful.

"So, what are you and Spike doing here then?" asks Xander, he's been 
desperate to ask that all night, "and why isn't junior here trying to kill 
everyone?"

"Oh, that's easy," Buffy comments, while eating her turkey. "Spike can't 
bite humans. Those commandos captured him and they did something to 
his head. Angel has visions, given to him by a dead Seer. Then they come 
to my town and with Willow, they screw the hell out of each other. I'm not 
straight about that part, Will. Did you screw both of them or just Angel? 
And was that before or after Angel fucked Spike?" She smiles sweetly and 
continues eating.

I can't believe she just said that. Xander's jaw drops open and he stares at 
Willow and me, then back to Willow. Giles chokes on his turkey and 
Anya has to perform the Heimlich maneuver. Me, I feel like burying 

myself in a nice deep hole - on the other side of the world. Spike just 
throws his head back and laughs. Suddenly, he's grabbing hold of my face, 
and drawing me into a deep kiss.

The table is silent while everyone stares at Spike' mouth attached to mine. 
"I think this is the best Thanksgiving ever," he proclaims taking a breath. I 
think I'll have to agree with him on some parts. He covers my mouth 
again, groping heavily and we continue to kiss in the silent room.



Vision Boy 3: The New BTVS Season 4 - Something Blue


Willow's POV: 

It's been a couple of days since - okay, it's been 4 days, 3 hours and 6...7 
minutes since I made love to Angel. Buffy looks to be coping better with 
it. She did have a small outburst at the Thanksgiving dinner, then a little 
heart attack when Angel and Spike starting making out in front of 
everyone. Then she kinda chased Spike around with a long stake for a few 
hours while Angel screamed in pain with a new vision. After that she went 
and killed the bad guy of said vision and calmed down a lot. After, Angel 
couldn't stop apologizing about how he and Spike acted the whole night. I 
swear I've never seen a vampire blush like he did. I never thought they 
could. I guess having sex isn't the only activity that makes their 
circulation start up.

Since that day Angel and me haven't had intercourse again. He and Spike 
are currently staying with Giles, and sleeping on his sofa. We've decided 
it's best to keep our relationship low key until Buffy settles down with the 
idea. It's very hard because whenever I see my dark vampire, all I want to 
do is screw him and afterwards keep him wrapped up in my arms all night. 
Which is really weird for mousy, shy Willow. I guess I'm not that person 
anymore. The bond with Angel, which I don't really understand yet, 
makes me stronger, physically and mentally. I wish I could spend more 
time with him and Spike, learning how much we are bonded together. And 
any other effects we haven't discovered, yet. Also, am I bonded to Angel 
and Spike, or are we bonded just to Angel? I know he is the central point 
between us, but what does that make Spike and me? Oh goddess, I have so 
many questions, but at this moment, I can't find the answers. We decided, 
with Giles, that the best way forward is to play this bond downbeat until 
Buffy becomes adjusted to the whole idea of it. When she finally lets 
Angel go and moves on. I know it's hard, I never thought I would move 
on with Oz. I still love him, I'll always miss him, but I have Angel now. I 
know he'll never leave me - he can't - I am part of him.

Hopefully, I think Buffy might be doing that moving on part. I caught her 
talking to a certain Riley Finn earlier in the student lounge. She blushed 
and batted her eyes at him, and he was all fingers and thumbs around her. 
His words coming out a jumbled mess. He seems a nice guy, and I'm 
praying that Buffy falls for him. I'm not pushing, but I really want to be 
with Angel again. I don't have Oz to hold me, and when I'm with Angel, I 
feel complete again - whole and my loneliness is gone. He's lucky he has 
Spike to be with all the time. Although Spike complains that Giles won't 
allow them to have sex in the house. I'm really looking forward to the 
time we can be together, because this situation is getting frustrating for all 
of us. The only trouble is, we have to talk Xander, Giles, Buffy and 
everyone else into accepting we are in this relationship together, and 
always shall be. Boy, I wish they could get rid of their Victorian ideas.

Tonight, I agreed to go patrolling with Buffy. We need some bonding 
time, and I need to know if she's getting any closer to dating Riley. Please, 
please say it's soon.

"It's just, different, you know? A picnic," Buffy continues telling me about 
this picnic that Riley invited her on. Please say you like him, "first of all, 
daylight - kind of a new venue, Buffywise. And the best part - he said he 
would bring all the food, so all I have to do is to show up and eat. Those 
are two things I'm really good at."

"So he's nice?" I ask casually. Say yes! 

"Very, *very*."

Yes!! "And there's sparkage?" I enquire calmly. 

"Yeah. He's- have you seen his arms? Those are good arms to have. I 
really like him. I do." 

"But?" Please say there isn't a but...



"I don't know. I really like being around him, you know? And I think he 
cares about me... but... I just... feel like something's missing."



"He's not making you miserable?"



"Exactly. Riley seems so solid. Like he wouldn't cause me heartache. 



"Get out. Get out while there's still time," I say, putting on the fake worry. 
This method always works. 

"I know... I have to get away from that bad boy thing. There's no good 
there. And Angel, well he's moved on to Spike! I mean I didn't even know 
he was gay. Do you think Riley's gay?"

"No!" Goddess, I hope not. "No, I'd certainly say Riley's as straight as an 
arrow. And Angel, well he's a vampire with the whole bi-sexual 
thing...shutting up now."

"It's okay, Willow. I'm getting over Angel. I can see he's moved on, even 
though he's... No... I understand I really do, it was the prophecy, you had 
no control and I don't blame you."

No control! I wasn't forced into Angel's arms. There was feeling there 
before, I just couldn't admit it. The prophecy just jump started our 
emotions and got rid of all the pesky worries. Like how Buffy's going to 
react, etc. I didn't reject being with him, or want to be with him. Still, I 
don't think it's the best time to approach that with Buffy. She's still in 
denial mode about the whole me not being pushed into Angel's life part.

"Well anyway, Angel and me had real fire and true love. Can a nice, safe 
relationship be as intense as we were? I know it's nuts, but... part of me 
believes that real love and passion have to go hand in hand with pain and 
fighting." Out of the blue, a vampire jumps out from behind a bush. He 
growls, but before the sound finishes leaving his lips, Buffy stakes him 
without batting an eyelid. I don't think she's over Angel just yet. Nope, 
it's best to keep quiet. I continue to walk beside her calmly and without a 
word.

"I wonder where I get that from?" She asks herself. 

Angel's POV:

I hate living here at Giles. It gives me and Spike no freedom at all. I think 
that's why Buffy and Xander were so adamant we stay here. They were 
resolute that I needed more observation. That we need to research the true 
meaning of the prophecy. Also, that we shouldn't really trust Spike 
because he is evil after all. Willow suggested that we agree with them for 
now. They are Willow's friends and they need to be okay with this. I don't 
mind about Spike and me, but Willow needs them, so I'll do this. I know 
Buffy's searching for a way to break the bond, or find a way that proves 
we were forced into it. She says the whole commando plot could have 
been one of Spike's plans. When Willow removed his little tracking 
device, she was sure Spike had put it there himself. We don't argue with 
Buffy, but gently try and guide her to the truth. The trouble is, she wants 
to blame everything on Spike - which is what she's doing now. 

"So you really can't explain what these Commando men really looked 
like. You saw their faces but you can't describe them?" she asks him 
again, exasperated. 

Spike grins at her from the sofa, where he and I are curled around each 
other, drinking our blood. I hate doing this to Buffy, but I had a vision 
earlier in the night about a vampire attack and it drained me. Physical 
contact with Spike soothes the pain for some reason. Maybe that's why the 
bond was necessary to keep me sane. Spike is my anchor, and he tells me 
what's real and what's not. Without him, I'd be lost in all the insanity I 
see. I just wish Buffy could accept this. I need to be with him or I fear I 
shall go insane.

"Oh come on, Spike. How can we really trust you when you don't even 
tell us the truth? Giles, make him stop that!" Buffy immediately grabs 
Spike's hand and pulls it away from my shoulder.

"Hey, it's not a crime to want to feel Angel up, is it? Hey Giles, can I cop 
of feel with Angel, or are you homophobic too?"

"Oh, do behave," Giles scolds, walking in with another cup of blood for 
me. "Here Angel, I've put a mild sedative in it that should help you sleep."

"Thank you, Giles," I answer.

"What's it for?" asks Buffy, suddenly worried. She sits herself down 
beside me, touching my hand. Spike growls suddenly low in his throat, but 
I elbow him to keep quite.

"Feedback," Spike answers curtly.

Buffy is about to give a smart comment, when I take her hand. "I get 
visions all the time, Buffy. My link to the Powers is never closed. 
Sometimes it's like a movie playing inside my head and I can't stop it. As 
well as the visions, I remember what Angelus did with crystal clarity. 
Also, I remember the lab where I was... I remember what they... what 
they..."

"Angel, drink your blood," Spike touches my face gently and I do as he 
suggests. I hate being the invalid here, and I hope I can learn to control 
this vision residue, as Giles calls it, soon. At the moment, after a vision 
I'm too weak and disorientated to do anything. Then I get mini visions, 
like if people are at the door, or if Spike's going to break another teacup. 
It's ridiculous. Giles says it's because the link between the Powers and me 
is too strong, that I'm open to everything and I get feedback from the 
events occurring around me. Therefore I know all the little things that are 
going to happen before hand, and it's over loading my brain. Another 
problem is - I want to get out of Giles' house, so Spike and I can have 
some privacy again. Then Willow might be able to come home to me. Her 
absence is like a constant ache inside me. She is a piece that is constantly 
missing from my life. However, I agree that we have to let Buffy move on 
first. 

Buffy steps away from me and drags Giles into the kitchen, as I drink 
down the warmed animal blood. She forgets that vampires have damn 
good hearing. I can hear her arguing with Giles about not trusting Spike. 
Spike snorts next to me and I shhhh him. Suddenly the outer door opens 
and Willow walks in. I smile instantly and open my arms to her. She 
checks no one is around, and then falls into my embrace, kissing me 
soundly on the lips.

"How are you?" she whispers.

"He'd recover more quickly if Buffy would leave us alone," grumbles 
Spike.

"She'll accept it soon," Willow mumbles against my lips. We kiss again, 
and she opens her mouth to my questing tongue. We only kiss for a few 
moments, but then the sounds of movement in the other room make us 
jump apart. Willow straightens her clothing and checks over some books 
on the table.

"Oh, hi Wills," Buffy comments, as she walks in with a large spell book in 
her hand. 

"What's going on," asks Willow, eyeing the spell book curiously.

"Giles and I have decided that it's best, for all our safely, to try a truth 
Spell on Spike. You know, just to make sure he's not pulling all our legs. 
And I don't want Angel hurt because of all of this." She gives me a sad 
smile and pats my knee lovingly. 

I know what she's trying to do, unfortunately it won't change the situation. 
I trust Spike implicitly. I can feel him on the edge of my mind, just as he 
can me. He knows everything I'm feeling, nearly everything I'm thinking. 
When I experience the visions, he's my only link to the real world.

"I think that might be a good idea," I agree with Buffy's suggestion. Spike 
glares at me with wide confused eyes, but Willow catches on. Buffy looks 
a little skeptical, but she can't back down now, since it was her suggestion.

"Oh, fine!" Spike shouts, "do whatever you want, it won't change 
anything." He snuggles into my back, wrapping his arms around my chest. 
Buffy's eyes flash with anger and jealously, and I disengage myself from 
Spike's embrace. For a moment he looks hurt, but then accepts my wishes. 
I don't want to hurt Buffy more than necessary. I want to touch Spike so 
desperately, but not in front of her.

"Well, yes... We'll have a go if everyone agrees," Giles comments, not 
really sure about what is happening here. 

"Looks pretty simple," Willow agrees, looking over the spell book. "I'll 
stop by the magic shop tomorrow."

"Oh, no. I can do it on the way home," Buffy instantly jumps up, grabbing 
her coat, "and I'll bring it by in the morning. I have to be going now; I 
need to do a paper for tomorrow. See you guys then!" she calls, as she 
closes Giles front door behind her.

"It is me, or is Buffy acting a little strange," Giles asks no one in 
particular, "I know she's a little upset about Angel and all, but..."



"You people are blind," comments Spike, drinking the last of his blood. 
"She's hangin' on by a thread. Any ninny can see that."

"Oh dear, you don't think she'll do anything rash do you?" Giles asks 
apprehensively cleaning his glasses.

I yawn and close my eyes; the sedative must be taking effect. I'm worried 
about Buffy too, but I'm too tired and exhausted to wonder anymore. I 
curl into Spike's embrace and go to sleep. 

Buffy's POV: 

When I arrive back at the dorm, I find myself alone. Willow hasn't 
returned from Giles' yet, which for the first time I'm glad about. I hate her 
being around Angel, but I need time alone. I hope I'm doing the right 
thing. No... I know I am. I have to make sure Angel is safe, because I 
don't think he is. He's been blinded by Spike, and he's been fooled by 
Willow's need. This prophecy has to be stopped and Angel released from 
their hold. I love Willow like a sister, but I think she's been so miserable 
about Oz leaving her that she'll do anything. She's under a spell, by Spike 
most probably, and I have to break it for all their sakes. They'll all 
understand when I reveal to them this is all a trick performed by Spike.

I pick up the bottle of beer I've been drinking, and finish it off. I need 
some courage here. I've never tried spells before. I've always left them to 
Willow. Okay, I'm the slayer and I can do this. I take a deep breath and 
open Willow's spell chest. Inside are candles, herbs and stuff, everything I 
need for this spell. I check the spell book, stolen from Giles and read the 
ingredients. I take out some red candles and place them around me, 
lighting them as I go. Then an incense censer, a mortar and pestle, a 
goblet, and some herbs. Parsley, thyme and rosemary. Hmm... sounds like 
cooking. I hope not though, because I'm a disaster in the kitchen. Okay, 
I'm ready.

"Harken all ye elements, I summon thee now," I read from the book. 
Gingerly I drop an herb into the bowl before me, and add water from the 
goblet. "Control the outside, control within. Land and sea, fire and wind. 
Out of my passions, a web be spun." I add the rest of the herbs.

"From this eve forth..."

"Buffy, I'm back!" Willow shouts, as she tires to open the locked door.

"Willow! Just a minute."

"Will be done. So let it be!" With a gush of wind, and a spark of bright 
light, the spell is cast. I hope that means the spell has worked. I quickly 
blow out the candles and shove everything under my bed.

"I'm coming," I yell to Willow, who's trying to open the door with her 
spare key. When everything is cleared away, I unlock the door.

"Hi," she says, looking at me a little concerned. "Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah, fine," I fake a yawn, "I'm just tired and I need some sleep."

"Okay, I'll just grab my stuff and have a shower." 

I smile and nod. Willow collects her things and goes into the girl's 
washroom. I sigh in relief; I can't believe how close that was. Now I have 
to check the spell.

"It's my will that... err... my hair is...red!" I look into the mirror on my 
desk and... nothing. It's blond. I check the spell book, but I did it right. I 
pick up a bent Q-tip. "I will that this Q-tip gets... unbendy?" Nothing! 
Something's not right here. Maybe I used the wrong herbs.

Willow's POV:

I have my shower and try to relax. I'm a little concerned about Buffy. I'm 
sure she was hiding something when I walked into the room. She never 
locks the door when she knows I'm coming back. Still, I have to be more 
understanding of her. It's hard to see your ex-boyfriend destined to be 
with someone else. She loves Angel, but I don't think she knows him 
anymore. She's in love with the vampire she met when she first came to 
Sunnydale. Ever since Angel returned from Hell, he's changed and so has 
she. During that time they have drifted apart, no longer the same people 
they were before. Angel certainly isn't, with these new Seer abilities. I just 
hope they don't change him too much. I just have to believe that Spike and 
I can keep him sane. I worry however, because I think that my being apart 
from Angel is hurting him. 

I return to the dorm to find it empty. Strange. I thought Buffy wanted to 
get some sleep. I discover a note on my bed. 

'Gone patrolling' That's all. No 'love Buffy' at the end. I decide to ring 
Giles and see if she went back there. I hope she's all right. I pick up the 
phone and dial his number. 

"Hi, Giles?" I ask, as I hear the other end pick up.

"Oh hello, Willow. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I got back safely, but I'm worried about Buffy. She's been acting a 
little strange, and I...." I look down and notice a book shoved under 
Buffy's bed. I pull it out. It's a spell book I know belongs to Giles. What 
is this doing here? "Did you lend Buffy a Spell book," I ask Giles.

"No," he answers, a little confused.

"Strange, she has one here... and wait a mo..." I check under her bed. 
There are candles and herbs. "I think she's been casting a spell. I just got 
back and the door was locked, and I think I interrupted her. Oh, Giles you 
don't think she did anything..."

"No, Buffy doesn't mess with magic," Giles interrupts. "I'm sure it's 
nothing. Maybe she wanted to show you something."

"Giles, you do know that Buffy doesn't really trust me anymore. She's 
confused about this whole Angel, Spike and me bonding thing. She 
doesn't believe that the prophecy is right. You don't think she was trying 
to break it?"

"Did you feel anything wrong?"

"No, I didn't feel a thing."

"I don't think Buffy would be messing around with magic, Willow. She is 
the Slayer; she doesn't have the temperament for witchcraft. And this 
prophecy deal, I really do think that she's dealing with it. She and Angel 
have moved on and..."

"No Giles, she hasn't moved on. Goddess, can't you see it?" I'm so angry 
and so afraid that Buffy might try to break the bond Spike and I have with 
Angel. "You know something Giles, you don't see what's going on with 
Buffy, and you don't see anything!"

~ On the other end of the phone, Giles jerks back as if he's been slapped. 
He can hear Willow talking, but he can't answer. His eyes burn and he 
removes his glasses. He quickly rubs his eyes, thinking it might be a little 
eyestrain. When replacing his glasses, the whole world seems dimmer - as 
if there is a fog before his eyes. He is shaken and turns his attention back 
to the phone. ~

"Um... Oh sorry, Willow... Something's come up and I'll have to talk to 
you later. Look I'll talk to Buffy when she comes around and confront her 
with this spell deal... Okay?"

"Oh. All right, Giles," I sigh, "I'll see you tomorrow."

Giles puts the phone down and I hang up too. That was so strange. One 
moment he's okay, and then... then he acts really strange. I had this 
strange feeling as I was talking to him. My eyes burned a moment and 
then... No, it's just worry. I'm worried about Angel, and Buffy, and 
everything else. Giles is right. Buffy wouldn't be messing with magic. 

"I just hope Riley doesn't go and get sick for Buffy's picnic. She really 
might try and do something stupid then," I say to myself, as I get into bed. 
Things aren't going well.

The next evening:

I walk into the dorm room to find Buffy sitting dejected on the bed. Our 
classes haven't over lapped today; they never do on a Monday, so I've 
been unable to check on her. 

"Hi Buffy, what's up?"

"Nothing," she sighs. She gives another great huff and... "Is it me or 
something? Because everything I do goes wrong."

"What do you mean?" I ask confused.

"I tried a spell last night and it didn't work. Then I go for this picnic and 
Riley's too sick to see me. I mean it must be me."

"What spell did you do?" I ask, concerned. What if she hurt Spike or 
Angel?

"A 'as I will' spell. Don't worry it didn't work. Watch," She indicates the 
desk. "I will that glass of water to be in my hand," she commands. 
Nothing happens. "See it doesn't work," she sobs.

I get Buffy to tell and show me exactly what she did. Everything seems 
right, the spell should have worked. It just didn't. Maybe the Slayer 
doesn't have the capacity to do spells or something. She's very apologetic 
about what she's done and I believe her sincerity. Angel did say that Buffy 
might betray us, maybe this is it. I comfort her as best I can and suggest 
we go over and talk things out with Giles. 

"Look Buffy, even I can't do all the spells I tried. You know how many 
times I've tried to de-rat Amy," I comfort her. She agrees and grabs her 
coat from the closet. "I think that maybe she's the only real witch here. I 
mean, one second she's a normal girl and the next a rat."

"I know Willow, I'm really sorry and I won't try it again." 

"I know Buffy, I'm sorry too. I never meant to hurt you." We hug each 
other and step out of the door. Maybe Buffy and I can work this out. 

~Unknown to both Willow and Buffy, the spell had worked. For a moment 
Willow's eyes had glowed blue as she said that Amy was a girl. For a 
second, Amy the human had appeared in her rat cage, the next second, as 
soon as 'rat' dropped from Willow's lips, she returned back into that state. 
The magic was working, but not how Buffy had expected it. ~

On the way over to Giles, we meet up with Xander. He's still a little 
uncomfortable around me, since the whole "I slept with Angel" thing 
dropped out.

"Hi guys, we're we going?" he greets, swaggering over to us. We take the 
scenic walk through the graveyard to Giles's house.

"We're going over to Giles to confess," Buffy informs him with a sad 
smile.

"What? We already know about the whole Angel and Willow thing," he 
laughs, "Unless they did it again. I never thought you would have a thing 
for demons, Willow." He chuckles more, and fishes out a bag of munchies 
from his pocket.

"Xander!" I yell back, "how can you say that, considering your own track 
record. I seem to remember you falling for a whole load of weirdos. Take 
the bug lady, mummy girl, Anya! You're a... a demon magnet!" I shout at 
him, my anger rising.

~Willow's eyes flash blue~

"Hey, Wills I was only joking," he answers apologetically. "I'm sorry, I 
didn't say it to hurt you or Buffy. You know me - me and my unstoppable 
flapping mouth."

"He's right Wills, he's totally brainless," Buffy giggles.

I laugh. Finally things are getting back to normal. We continue to walk 
through the graveyard, thankfully not being disturbed by any newly risen 
vampires tonight.

"So, you think Angel and Spike really love each other?" Buffy asks, after 
a long silence. 

I hope she's getting used to the idea. "Yeah, I think they do. Angel talked 
about him and Spike when he was still calling himself William. I think 
even Angelus loved him. They were just pulled apart by fate."

"You're making it sound like they are Romeo and Juliet," laughs Xander. 

"It's just hard seeing them together," Buffy whispers.

"I know Buff, but it's not meant to hurt you. You can't help whom you 
fall in love with. Angel will always love you, but..."

"But he belongs with Spike; I get that," Buffy finishes, "I just never want 
to see them get married or anything," she laughs sadly.

"Oh, yeah," I answer back, laughing, as my mind fills with Angel and 
Spike getting married in church. I wonder who would wear the wedding 
dress! "I can just see that, Angel and Spike getting married!"

~Willow's eyes flash blue *again*. ~

"You think they would go poof when the priest blessed them?" asks 
Xander, giggling hysterically. 

When we reach Giles' house an unwelcome sight greets us. Anya. She's 
just about to knock on Giles' door when we she notes our arrival. As soon 
as she spots Xander, it's like her eyes light up and she starts salivating. 
And I thought Spike was sex mad, but no one compares to Anya. After a 
few short, private words with her, he informs us they have something very 
important to discuss at his place and he'll see us later. Buffy and I just roll 
our eyes - we know that there will be no talking going on at Xander's. 
Goddess, I wish I could be doing that now with Angel.

We knock on Giles door, his shout informs us the door is open, and we let 
ourselves in. Suddenly, both of us stop dead at the sight before us. Angel 
is kneeling on one knee before a seated Spike. He looks deeply into 
Spike's face, their eyes meeting.

"Spike, my beloved Childe, do me the honor of saying you'll marry me."

"Oh my god! Giles!" screams Buffy.

"Just a minute," Giles shouts from the bathroom.

"Oh, Angel," Spike weeps, wiping a tear from his eye, "Angel, you don't 
know how long I've waited for you to love me. I will," he grabs Angel by 
the face and kisses him passionately. Then kisses some more, and more... 
and more... Goddess, don't they need to breathe?! Oh, I forgot - Vampires 
- dead already.

"Giles!" Buffy yells again, staring in shock at Angel and Spike. They have 
both slipped off the chair, and are currently groping and kissing on the 
floor. They've started moaning and grunting as their bodies rub together. 
Oh wow, they look so good. I'm desperate for a little Angel action myself. 
Hold on! What if they get married and they won't want me?

"Giles!" I scream! Something is so not right here. Really wrong, I feel it in 
my bones.

Giles appears from the bathroom, his eyes red and sore. He almost trips 
over Angel and Spike groping on the floor. His eyes widen as he takes it 
all in.

"What the hell?"

"Oh Giles, I'm so happy," proclaims Angel from the floor, "Spike's 
agreed to marry me. I'm the happiest ma... vampire in the world!" He 
returns his mouth back to Spike' and they continue to feel each other up.

Giles takes of his glasses and wipes them again, looking totally baffled. I 
am too, because the longer I look at them, the more I get this nagging 
feeling something is going haywire. I just feel that a spell or something 
has violated Angel... Damn this is frustrating. I'm not jealous of him 
loving Spike, but something is wrong with this picture, I just can't work 
out what it is.

"Angel, Spike!" Giles yells, "Get yourselves off my floor this instant!" He 
sounds like a disgruntled parent. Instantly, both Spike and Angel stand and 
look embarrassed from their kissing session. Spike takes Angel's hand and 
squeezes it gently.

"We'll get to that later, luv," he mumbles to Angel.

"Not in my house, you won't!" Giles disagrees.

Suddenly, Buffy starts to cry and flings herself into Giles' arms. Oh, 
brother!

"Buffy, please don't cry," Angel says, coming over and trying to comfort 
her, "I'll always love you, but Spike and I are forever... and he's a vampire 
like me. I can't give you sunlight and children, with Spike he doesn't need 
that. We are the same, and I love him. Our love could never be..."

"Angel, you still love her," states Spike incredulously. "You said you 
loved only me! I'm just second best, aren't I? You can't have her, so you 
have to settle with me!"

"No Spike, please. You are my Childe. I love you!" Angel pouts, his large 
brown eyes filling with tears. He cups Spike's face and continues to speak 
lovingly, "I want to marry you and be with you for eternity. I want to be 
with you when the world ends, and our dust will be combined together 
forever. We'll be one for all etern..."

"Shut up!" Giles and I scream in unison.

Spike and Angel smile at each other and embrace. Finally, Angel pulls 
Spike into a comfortable chair, and he slides into Angel's lap, as they start 
the whole kissing and groping thing again.

"Give me strength!" proclaims Giles, as he tried to comfort a weeping 
slayer. "I need a drink." Giles guides Buffy to the sofa and sits her down. 
He goes over to his drink cabinet and blindly searches around for a bottle 
and glass. I watch for a moment, I don't think he can see it. After great 
difficulty, he grabs a bottle, and takes a large swig without pouring it into 
a glass.

"Giles, are you okay?" I ask softly.

"I rather think not. I seem to be rather... rather... blind. Completely, in 
fact." Angel and Spike groan loudly as their lips compress against each 
other, Spike's hands running down and over Angel's growing arousal.

"Stop that right now! I can hear the smacking," Giles complains at them, 
taking another swig of whiskey and petting Buffy's head comfortingly as 
she sobs into his shirt.

I just stand shell-shocked. My brain is ticking over, questioning, what the 
hell is happening to everyone? I think I'm working it out and... Oh 
goddess! Buffy's spell did work! She put it on me! I said to Giles earlier 
about how he couldn't see anything. Then on the way over her I said about 
Angel and Spike getting married. Oh, bloody hell! I hope Xander's all 
right.

~The darkness of Xander's basement room, he and Anya roll and kiss 
upon the sofa bed. They pull at each other's clothing, their fingers 
desperate to touch soft, naked skin. Their lips meet tenderly, while their 
hips rock together.

"Xander! Do you and your friend want something to eat?" Xander's 
mother's voice echoes in the dark basement room.

"No, Mom!" Xander yells, as he breaks away from Anya's mouth. 

"I liked those fruit roll-ups," Anya reminds him, sitting up. Xander groans, 
mentally cursing his mother for interrupting their necking session. "I can 
wait; however," Anya smiles and returns to kissing his warmed lips. They 
fall back onto the bed, while Anya unzips his trousers. Xander gives a 
deep groan and reaches for her mouth again.

Suddenly, as they writhe on the bed, a green skinned, horned demon bursts 
in through the side door. They jump up and both give a small girly scream. 
The demon spots Xander and grins. He gives him a once over noticing the 
bulge in Xander's open trousers and immediately advances. Xander 
follows the demon's gaze, quickly zipping himself up again. The demon 
licks its lips and makes a grab at the boy. With a loud yell, the demon 
collapses to the floor, unconscious. Xander stares at his girlfriend holding 
a large baseball bat in her hands.

"That's my boyfriend!" she yells at the dazed demon. Xander and Anya 
both grab the rest of their clothing, while more and more demons start 
clambering through the broken door. They stare at each other in horror as 
they are slowly surrounded. Xander thinking quickly, grabs Anya's hand 
and helps her escape through the basement window. Xander follows close 
behind her.

"What the hell is going on!" he yells. ~

"Huh guys, I think I know what's happened," I announce enthusiastically. 
My friends pay little attention - Angel and Spike continue kissing, while 
Buffy sobs onto Giles' shoulder. "Guys!" I yell, just as the door swings 
open and in rushes a panting Xander followed by Anya. Then they both 
stop dead staring at Spike and Angel making out on the chair.

"Duh dum, da-da... Duh dum, da-da, duh dum da da dum da da dum da 
da..." Spike starts to mumble into Angel's ear, while Angel licks over his 
jugular with a cool tongue. Damn, I wish I were Spike at this moment. 
No... Back to finding out how to break this spell Buffy has cast over me.

"I wanna mate with you, Spike," Angel answers, kissing down Spike's 
neck. "Properly, I'll give up my sire claims and we can be equals."



"Oh god...Yes, Angel!" Spike moans into Angels' mouth.

"Board up the windows, and barricade the doors," screams Xander, but 
continues gaping at Angel and Spike the whole time. He shakes himself 
out his stupor, and pulls me towards the door to help him move the 
bookcase. 

"What's going on?" asks Giles, looking around blindly.



"Demons. They keep coming and coming," answers Anya, helping us 
move the bookcase.



"I think we lost them, but I couldn't see..." Xander begins, interrupted by a 
loud snarl from both vampires as they morph into game face, and sink 
fangs into each other's throat. They embrace tightly, their hips rocking 
together. "and... What the hell are they doing?"

"Their getting married!" weeps Buffy from the sofa, "and Giles is blind," 
she finishes.

"Giles is blind?" Anya asks, waving her hand before his face. 

That's it! I've had enough. No one listens to me. "Will everyone SHUT 
THE HELL UP!" I screech. Suddenly there is silence; even Angel and 
Spike have stopped kissing. "Now sit down!" I command. Everyone 
moves over to a seat, and quickly sits. Hey, I'm beginning to like this 
being the bossy one. 

"Right," I grin at my finally quiet audience. At long last I get some 
attention around here. "Right, this is really simple. Buffy did an 'As I will' 
spell which went wrong. For whatever reason, I was the one she put the 
spell on - not herself. Now, I spoke to Giles about him not seeing what's 
happening and now he's blind." Giles goes to speak, but I silence him, 
"Quiet! Then I said that Spike and Angel should get married, after I told 
Xander he was a demon magnet... is everyone following this?" They nod 
but don't speak. "Good. So now all we have to do is reverse the spell, and 
everyone is happy again."

"You don't really want to mate with me?" sobs Spike, shoving himself 
away from Angel.

"I do. I don't care if it's a spell; it's just bringing out the truth. I've always 
wanted you," Angel begs, trying to grab Spike's hands.

"No, you don't!" Spike turns on his heel, races out of the living room and 
through the back door.

"William!" howls Angel. 

"Wait, Buffy did a spell?" asks Xander incredulously.

"I wanted to put everything right!" wails Buffy.

"William!" Angel bellows again.

"Angel, shut up!" Anya interrupts.

"William!" screeches Angel and I finally catch on. He's having a vision. 
Angel's whole body convulses on the chair, and his head slaps back hard 
against the headrest. 

"Oh shit!" I yell. This isn't happening! I run over to Angel and try to hold 
him down. His whole body is racked with pain, and we fall to the floor. He 
lands with a hard smack, his head impacting on the wooden floorboards. 
Blood sprays everywhere from a head wound. With quick thinking, 
Xander grabs a towel and tries to press it to his head. Angel howls in 
agony, his bones cracking from the strain of the convulsions. I hear a 
crunch as Angel's arm is fractured from his thrashing and another spray of 
blood covers me. 

"Angel!" I scream. Oh goddess, what do I do?! I need Spike! Wait! The 
spell! "I will Angel to be free of the visions." .... Nothing!!

"Giles, why won't the spell work on Angel!"

"His visions are not magically given; they are from the powers!" he shouts 
back, "Wish him restrained!"

"I will Angel to be safely restrained on a bed!" I yell. Please work!

~Willow's eyes flash blue. ~

With a sudden flash of light, Angel is strapped down to a hospital gurney. 
He thrashes and screams but can no longer hurt himself. Xander acts 
quickly and wraps another towel around Angel's openly fractured arm. I 
gently stroke his face, wishing him to be okay. 

"Angel is connected to the powers, I don't think you can wish them away, 
Willow," Giles says, suddenly at my arm. I feel like weeping for him as 
Angel screams in agony. I wish I knew what he was seeing.

"He's in so much pain," I sob, "if only Spike were here." I reach out and 
stroke Angel's face gently. I hope I haven't destroyed his and Spike's 
relationship. This is all my fault. 

"I'll go and find him!" shouts Buffy, running towards the back door. She 
suddenly stops and screeches. 

Spike comes back inside, fighting off a whole hoard of demons. Every 
size, color and build are trying to get into... no, not get in, they want 
Xander! Anya and I both run to help Buffy and Spike fight them off and 
we manage to shut the door. We move the heavy kitchen cabinet in front 
of it, hoping to block them out for a while. From above there is a crashing 
sound of glass being broken. Another crash comes from the living room.

"Buffy! Block off the window!" cries Giles, trying to look around 
desperately, but unable to see a thing. With everyone's help, we push 
another bookcase in front of the window. We are going to have to do 
something soon; we are all trapped here!

"Giles!" I yell over Angel's screaming, "how do we break Buffy's spell?" 
Then I turn to Spike, "You go and look after Angel!" Spike pouts a 
moment, but does as I command him. I love being in control! 

Suddenly, the front door crashes open, and half a dozen demons pour in. 
Buffy and Xander are first in line to fight them off. They pick up a couple 
of Giles's heavy lamps, using them as bats. Anya too takes up an umbrella 
and tries to fight them off in much the same way.

"Giles, the spell!" I yell. I grab up a large heavy book, and whack it on the 
head of the nearest demon. He grunts under the blow and collapses before 
me. Hey, I'm pretty strong here. Out of the blue a fist connects with my 
cheek and I'm thrown back against the wall. This time I use one of 
Buffy's techniques and kick him where his balls should be. He groans 
loudly and another demon is out for the count. I jump up and run over to 
Spike, trying to calm and protect Angel at the same time. I notice that 
Giles isn't coping well, and has his hands full with trying to save himself.

"Buffy..." Angel suddenly pants as I come nearer. "Spell... broken... her 
words..." he gasps. He groans in pain and his teeth crunch, as another 
spasm passes through his body. 

"Only Buffy can break the spell?" I ask back, shouting over the racket. 
Upon hearing those words, Spike runs off to take Buffy's place in the front 
line, fighting the demons back. He howls in joy as he discovers that with 
his first swing, he can hurt demons. In seconds, Buffy is by Angel's side.

"Buffy, repeat after Angel, whatever he tells you!" I shout, and go back to 
keeping the demons away from them.

Moments later, I hear Buffy's clear voice. She repeats Angel's broken 
words spoken to her. She shouts them over the din of fighting occurring 
around her. "Let the healing power begin. Let my will be safe again. As 
these words of peace are spoken, let this harmful spell be broken!"

~Willow's eyes glow blue as thunder crashes, and lightening flashes. ~

Spike's POV:

As soon as the Slayer's words echo around the room, all the fighting ends. 
Which is a little disappointing because I've just discovered that I can still 
battle with demons. I was enjoying working out my temper on them. The 
spell hurt in more ways that I want to admit. For years I've wanted to be 
Angelus' equal, and when he finally wants that too, it was all because of a 
spell. A spell done by the Bloody slayer. Bitch is always messing up my 
life!

"William," Angel moans softly. I try and remain stoic, but the sound of the 
pain in his voice cuts me to the bone. "William!" he sobs. 

I quickly move to his side and take his hand. He's been restrained to the 
bed by heavy leather bindings, but he can still move his hands a little. He 
squeezes mine tight and I hold on.

"I'm here, Angel," I whisper. His appearance shocks me. His head is 
covered in blood, from a head wound. They always bleed a lot. He also 
has a fractured arm, which is bent, at a strange angle, the bone protruding 
out of his skin.

"Spike," he murmurs. I lean down, so I can hear him better. "Marrying 
you might have come from a spell, but it's still true. I want to be your 
equal, your mate. This is me talking without a spell." He grins slightly, 
which really turns out more a grimace, as a fresh wave of pain passes 
through him.

"We'll get you cleaned up first, Angel," I answer, smiling stupidly.

Angel wants me! Wants me as his equal! His lover! Wow! 

"Angel, are you okay?" Willow asks, bending over him and softly kissing 
his lips. 

There is no jealously in me from her simple action. He didn't ask her to 
mate with him, but me - twice! Okay, one was from the spell, but this one 
isn't. This is pure Angel. 

"Spike, stop the stupid grinning," she chills me, "and help me get Angel 
cleaned up."

The Next Morning: 

The spell effects have vanished, Xander is no longer a demon magnet and 
Giles can see again. It was a long night, however. Angel was violently sick 
from the pain of the vision. We cleaned him up, and Willow, Angel and 
myself spent the night in Giles' bed. We didn't make love, since Angel 
puking his guts out wasn't a huge turn on. We washed him, bandaged his 
wounds, told him what was real and what wasn't, and in the end we finally 
got some sleep. 

Giles is concerned about Angel's worsening vision sickness and the 
convulsions. This time they nearly tore his body to shreds. He has some 
concerns that those commandos did something to him as well as me. He 
was in that examination room for nearly two days. Angel won't talk about 
it, but in that time, anything could have been done to him. We talk about 
sorting out a study of Angel, but just then Buffy arrives. Since the spell 
and Angel's fears about her, we have decided not to include her or let her 
care for Angel. I won't have her near him, and Willow doesn't trust her. 
Giles is confused about the whole situation, but bends to our request.

Buffy immediately starts cooking chocolate-chip cookies, which aren't 
bad. Later Anya and Xander come by and surprisingly bring some extra 
blood for Angel, since he did save Xander from becoming a Demon love 
pet. Buffy of course made more cookies, which I just had to eat.

"How long are you going to keep making these?" Anya asks, munching 
down on another round. 



"Oh, until I don't feel so horribly guilty. I figure about a million chips 
from now. Also, I have to detail Giles' car."

On the sofa, Xander is testing Giles recovered eyesight and holds up a 
clock. "Time?" he asks. 

"A-ha... Five past two. Thursday," Giles reads happily. 



"Look, cookies. A very not-evil thing I did. Oatmeal?" Buffy asks Giles, 
offering him a plate. 

"Yes, very funny, they're chocolate chip. I can see them. I still need my 
glasses, though. You could have been more specific and given me 20/20 
vision," replies Giles, removing his glasses and taking a cookie with a 
large scowl on his face. 

Buffy walks over to Willow and asks sheepishly. "Eat a cookie; ease my 
pain?"



"Mm... Better?" enquires Willow, after taking a bite from a chocolate chip 
cookie. 



"Well, baking lifts about 30% of my guilt, but only 7% of my inner 
turmoil. Guess that'll just take awhile."

"It'll happen," Willow replies, with a large, fake smile. She's scared of 
Buffy now, and even more careful to avoid her going near Angel. Buffy 
wanted to see him earlier, but Willow said he was sleeping. Which was a 
lie. I'm so proud of little Red; she'll be corrupted soon enough. 



"Don't I get a cookie?" I ask, as Buffy misses me. I see she still hates me 
about the whole 'Angel wants to mate with me' thing. Tell the truth, I 
don't give a toss. 



"No."



"Not even one for Angel? He might want me to feed it to him," I 
comment. Buffy gives me a dark scowl, but hands me two cookies, 
walking away.

I take the cookies, and quickly run up to Giles - now Angel's - room. I 
discover him looking much better and sitting up reading Giles's book.

"You really shouldn't upset her, Spike. That was the whole reason for the 
'As I Will' spell."

"Yeah, but she's so easy to wind up. I only have to mention your name 
and she gets all jumpy."

"Spike..."

"I know. I promise I won't wind the Slayer up, okay?" I lean down over 
him, and throw aside the book. "What are you going to give me to 
compensate for my lack of excitement for not winding the Slayer up?"

"Hmmm... My cookie?"

"Already eaten it."

"My love?"

"Already got it."

"My equality and my eternity?"

"Are you asking to marry me again?"

"No, I'm asking if you want to mate with me." He grins up at me, licking 
his lips. 

I lean down to cover his mouth with my own. "Okay, then!" I agree, as I 
kiss his lips.

~Downstairs a crash is heard, and a loud "Woohoo!" from the upstairs 
bedroom. Willow grins and continues to eat her cookie, while Buffy looks 
longingly up the stairs.

"I hope they aren't going to be here for long," Giles murmurs to himself. ~



Vision Boy 4: The New BTVS Season 4 - 

The Blood Dance 


Willow's POV:

This is so boring! Oh goddess, even Buffy's gone to sleep - and drooling! 
Damn, I wish I were at Giles with Angel... and Spike. 

I thought Psychology was supposed to be interesting! Walsh is blathering 
on about what's needed in the review on Monday, but I can't really 
concentrate, and Buffy is fast asleep. All I can think about is Angel. He's 
getting better since his last vision. The last few days have been very quiet 
and he's only had minor ones. He's fully healed, but now I'm concerned 
about this mating they both want to carry out. 

That's another reason I want to go to Giles. I need to see what I can find 
out about this vampire mating ritual. I just have a strange feeling about it. 
Except, I can't go yet. I have a Wicca meeting after this class, and I so 
want to see Tara again. She's really pretty and her eyes...

"Hmmm..." Buffy shifts in her chair, and I realise she's awake.

"Man, that was an exciting class, huh?" I comment, as she opens her eyes.

Buffy blinks a couple of times and looks around, a little confused. "Oh 
yeah, well..." she mumbles, totally oblivious to what Professor Walsh has 
been talking about.

I just can't resist it. "And the last twenty minutes was a revelation. She 
just laid out everything we need to know for the final. I'd hate to have 
missed that."

For a moment, Buffy's eyes widen and then she realizes I've been 
bluffing. We collect our papers, and she grins at me. "Just tell me I didn't 
snore," she answers. 

We talk companionably as we walk out, but we're joined by that annoying 
Riley. They start throwing comments around about Buffy's dream. 
Sometimes, I just wish they'd get it together and he'd just shag the girl! 
Oh goddess, now I sound like Spike! I just miss Angel! I need him, and 
since Buffy isn't getting any, neither am I! I quickly excuse myself and 
head off to my Wicca meeting. I hope I can get to talk to Tara again.

Spike's POV:

Food! Food! Doesn't this man have any decent food? I mean vegetables, 
rice, and pasta - who needs that rubbish? I want biscuits, chocolate, 
marshmallows! I sigh. Looks like I'll be having to go out and do some 
shopping *again*. But I wanted to watch Passions with Angel. Damn it!

Ooo, what's this? Damn! Empty box of Weetabix. 

Giles walks in from the front room, after he's finished talking on the 
phone to someone. He gives me a disapproving stare, but I continue me 
search for something decent to eat.

"Have you heard of a group called "The Gentlemen"?" Giles asks me, 
putting down a note pad.

Ahh! Found it! I pull out a bottle of peanut butter and a bag of crackers. 
Damn good stuff peanut butter. It goes so smoothly onto cool vampire 
skin. Particularly one vampire, who's currently asleep in front of the TV.

"Group of what?" I ask confused, not really listening to a word he says.

"The Gentlemen," Giles stresses, his voice getting that annoyed edge. I've 
been hearing that a lot lately. I can't think why.

"Dunno," I answer, grabbing my stuff. Passions starts in a few minutes, 
and I want to get comfy on top of Angel.

"You're certain?"

What's this an interrogation?

"No... But we are out of Weetabix," I remind him. He should really be a 
better host.

"We are out of Weetabix because you ate it all... Again!"

"Get some more." Damn if these humans aren't just thick. I run out of 
stuff, they should buy more to replace it. Do I have to think of everything? 
Now, was there something Angel wanted? Hmmm... nah, he'll have to go 
with the peanut butter.

"I thought vampires were supposed to eat blood," Giles comments, a 
disgusted look on his face.

Yep, as thick as a plank these humans. I sigh. "Yep. Well, sometimes I 
like to crumble up the Weetabix in the blood - gives it a little texture." 
And they think I'm a little slow!

I roll my eyes at his pale features and walk into the front room. Angel 
shifts with my presence and I sit beside him. He had a small vision earlier, 
which was the reason behind Giles' phone call. It has left him drained and 
tried. He'd better wake up soon though; I want some action during 
Passions. Even if it is only necking and a little feel up.

"Since the picture you just painted means I'll never touch food of any kind 
again, you'll just have to pick it up yourself."

Huh! There's no need to get huffy. "Sissy," I call at Giles retreating back.

"Don't pick on him, Spike," a sleepy voice murmurs from the sofa.

I grin and lean down over my lover. His eyes are partially open, and I kiss 
his parted lips. He opens up wider under the pressure of my mouth, 
allowing my tongue to sweep inside, tasting him fully.

"Only peanut butter, then?" he complains, as I pull away from his soft lips.

"You could have peanut buttered Spike," I answer, leaning down to kiss 
him again, while scooping out a handful of the creamy brown substance.

Willow's POV:

Oh goddess, what a load of idiots! Fools! Children! Stupid Wicca group! 
They don't know the first thing about magic! 

I sigh, and look over the desk at Tara. I feel my cheeks flush, as I gaze 
upon her perfect features. She's so pretty. I just can't get over it. It's 
terrible, but when I'm around her I get all flustered and hot! She's the only 
thing good about the Wicca group. Actually, she was the one to suggest 
this.

We left the group early, and came here to the Magic Shop. I told her about 
the mating ritual between my two vampires. I didn't tell her of our 
relationship, because... Well, I didn't want her to think I was spoken for. 
She suggested coming to the magic shop and researching about this 
vampire ritual. She could see that I was concerned about it. It's amazing 
how she notices such small things about me. Not even Angel knows how 
worried I am about it. Tara caught onto that straight away.

"Here," she says, holding out an open book, "this s-seems... to err, be 
concerning a blood ritual."

For a moment, I don't reply. I just love the way she stutters. It's nice and 
so... She looks at me strangely, and she seems even more nervous. I 
quickly take the book and smile at her. I look down and notice the words 
'blood dance'. I start to read. 

Oh dear!

Spike's POV:

Hmmm, tasty. Angel's skin is so soft under my tongue. I lick away the 
peanut butter covering his pert male nipple. He groans and stretches 
beneath me. His hips rocking desperately into mine at my soft touch. 
Damn, I wish we could both be naked right now. I urgently want to touch 
him, to rub peanut butter over that silky, hard penis of his. I can't though, 
because Giles has banned it!

No SEX in the house. Doesn't mean I can't touch him, and drive us both 
to the edge, now does it?

"Ewww, Spike! Angel!"

Bloody hell!

"Giles, Spike is sexually attacking Angel on your couch!" 

I look up from Angel's naked chest, and give him one last, long lick. 
Xander and Anya stare opened mouthed at us, with wide, shocked eyes. 
Oh please, as if they aren't shagging all the time when they are alone!

"I'm not shagging him! Look, he still has his jeans on!"

"Spike!" Angel hisses, as I pull away from his hips. Everyone looks down 
at Angel's huge hard-on stretching the soft material of his jeans. He 
instantly pulls me back against his chest, covering his embarrassing 
erection.

"Spike, get off Angel!" Giles hollers from the kitchen.

We both sigh and sit up. We so need to find a home off our own. Angel 
strokes through my hair, putting it into place and I lean into his touch. 
Bugger, I love him so much. It's damn sickening.

Angel's POV:

"I... Umm, need you to take Angel and Spike for a few days," Giles tells 
Xander.

"What?" Spike and Xander yell at the same time. Both of them jump up, 
staring at each other dangerously.

"We are not staying with him! There's only one bed!!" Spike exclaims. 
Xander instantly pulls a face, knowing exactly what Spike means. Does he 
always think about sex? Whoops, just remembered this is Spike I'm 
talking about.

"Spike..." I interrupt. He throws me a harsh glance.

"No Angel, we aren't staying with him!" he growls back. "We have 
something important to do!" He gives me a knowing look. I know we 
planned to do the mating ritual this weekend. Tomorrow, in fact.

"Well, you're not staying here!" Giles shouts back, then calms again. He 
sighs and returns to the normal Giles voice. "I have a friend who's coming 
to town, and I'd like us to be alone."

"Oh, you mean an orgasm friend?" Anya nods understandingly, and I 
swear Giles turns five shades brighter.

"We don't give a fuck! Angel and me are going somewhere else with 
weekend!" Spike yells in fury. I catch his hand and give him a warning 
look. I don't want them to know what we have planned. I won't have them 
interfering with our mating.

"I don't think that's safe, Spike. Angel needs constant surveillance..." 
Giles starts in his lecturing mode.

"He'll never leave the bedroom, luv," Spike answers slyly.

"Spike!" Xander exclaims, covering his ears. 

I smile at the boy's apparent distaste for homosexual activities. It is really 
a little over the top. Makes me wonder if he's got something to hide. Spike 
especially catches on to that part.

"In fact, he won't be leaving the bed. He'll be all naked, hard and 
dripping. Me astride him, running my mouth up and down that..."

"Spike!!!" All three humans scream. I swear that Xander looks like he's 
going to pass out at any moment.

"Angel!!" At that moment our conversation is interrupted by the lithe 
figure of Willow running through the door. She looks pale and panicked, 
flying directly into my arms.

"Willow!" I cry, holding her tight. "Is something wrong? Are you hurt?" I 
ask, as she buries her face into my shoulder. I smell sudden tears and she 
grasps my shoulders.

"I-I... the..." Willow draws away from my shoulder, and looks me directly 
in the eye. She's about to say something, but then remembers other people 
are with us. "It's nothing, err... bad psych day," she sighs. She gives me a 
look that says this is far from nothing, but it's something best discussed 
without the whole Scooby gang here.

"Hey, they can stay at Willow's!" Xander comments, looking decidedly 
pleased with himself.

"Well, if that's okay..." Giles starts looking at the girl in my arms.

So starts another whole conversation about Giles sex life, and where we 
are allowed to live while his friend visits. In the end, it's decided that 
Willow's is the best place, thank god, and we pack what little belongings 
we have. I know that when we get there, Willow's sure to tell me what's 
wrong. And I'm not looking forward to it. In fact, it's something I'm 
dreading because I know what her question shall be.

Later - At Willow's home:

"But why!?" Willow cries for the sixth time. "It's so dangerous; I could 
lose both of you!" She's been sobbing her heart out for the last 2 hours. 

"Because I wanna fucking mate with him!" Spike yells in return. He has 
no tact, and this only upsets Willow even more.

"You want to risk Angel dying just so you can screw him!" She bellows 
back, eyes filling with more tears.

Off course, the worse has happened. As I feared. Willow has discovered 
about the Vampire mating ritual. I don't know how because it's not a 
publicly discussed, and as far as I know we vampires have never told 
humans about it. But that's not the point now. Willow knows and she's 
dead set against Spike and I performing it.

"Willow! Spike! Please, shouting won't help anything!" I interrupt before 
the name calling starts again.

"But Angel, you could die!" Willow wails again.

"I could die at any time, Willow. These visions are tearing me apart; this 
mating - bonding - could even help that situation. And I... I want this, mo 
cumhacht. I want to mate with Spike." I sit down, and stare at both my 
beloveds. They face each other as if ready to fight, fists clenched, and 
faces red with anger.

"You could die," Willow whispers sadly. "I don't want to lose you."

"I know, Willow. And you won't, I promise."

Willow moves before me, and kneels at my feet. She takes my large hands 
into her tiny, warm ones. "I love you so much, my Angel. I've only just 
found you," she tells me, as her soft fingers stroke the cool skin of my 
palms.

Behind her, Spike flings himself into the nearest chair and pouts. It's so 
cute, I wish I could kiss him, but I need to comfort Willow. He rolls his 
eyes at me and lights a fag. I think that was permission to reassure Willow, 
and set her mind at rest. I lean down and pull the petite girl into my arms 
and settle her on my lap. I kiss her forehead, and wrap my arms around her 
waist.

"Willow, what you've read is true. The mating ritual is very dangerous. 
No one ever tries it unless they are truly sure that their chosen is perfectly 
matched with them. We must be matched in strength, intelligence, and 
desire. With Spike, those are conditions I know we can fulfill."

"But..." she interrupts, her wet face rubbing into my neck.

"I know there are other factors, but I want this, Willow. No, more than that 
- we need this. My visions are leaving me  more and more drained. You 
know that last time I only had a short, insignificant one, and even then had 
convulsions that broke my arm again. If this bond works, it will bind me 
and Spike together. We shall share strength, and it's said that the bond can 
also increase our power. If that's true, surely that's going to help me - 
yes?" I kiss her forehead, and hold her tighter.

"Yes... I agree with all that... but," Willow moans, "but you won't want 
me..."

I laugh softly and kiss her again. "I shall always want you. You are my 
strength, mo cumhacht. You are part of me, Willow, for always." 

This time Willow turns in my embrace and wraps her arms around my 
shoulders. "You promise to be careful during the ceremony?" she begs.

My heart swells at her courage. She's desperately afraid, but she's going 
to let us carry out our mating ritual. "I promise, "I whisper, as I kiss her 
ear. 

Willow hot little hands drift down to my waist and rip open my jeans. I 
groan as she pulls my half-erect cock out and pumps me hard. I know 
what she wants. She kisses me fiercely. She's terrified and needs the 
contact. I don't deny her this, and it's been so long since I could touch her. 
My second lover. I grab hold of the bottom of her skirt - thanking her 
goddess she chose not to wear jeans today - and push it up around her 
waist. Her panties are quickly torn away, and I lift her over my straining 
cock.

"Angel!" Willow screams, as I slam her down onto my length. She bucks 
against me, taking me deep into her hot center. Our mating is wild and 
unrestrained. We clutch and kiss with abandonment, our bodies crashing 
together. I smell her need, and I reach down between us to run my finger 
over her clit. Moments later, Willow bellows my name in orgasm. Her 
clenching muscles send me immediately over the edge and I fill her with 
cooling sperm.

Finally, we collapse together, our arms holding tight. Willow pants softly 
into my ear, and I can feel her fears abating. She trusts me and I shall be 
forever grateful.

"Good show," Spike comments from his place across the room. "You 
could have made it last a little longer, though."

I snarl and Willow laughs, as she blushes a deep red.

Spike's POV:

Finally! Willow's has got everything out her system - even managed to 
squeeze in a quick shag with Angel. Not that I really mind, she is part of 
our bond. We are all part of the three - connected to Angel. She has as 
much right to him as I do.

"Spike? Are you sure you want to do the mating tomorrow? I mean... it's 
okay if you wanna wait..." 

I turn to face Angel, and conclude he's been trying to talk to me while I've 
been lost in thought. After Willow left we fed, and sat down to discuss our 
plans. Things aren't like I thought they would be. There is so much bloody 
planning, and so many preparations to make. It isn't just kiss - bite - shag. 
Even though I wish it was. There is a whole ritual to perform, *boring* 
challenges and tasks to be fulfilled *mega boring*, and only then I can 
shag him *Yay*!

"I'll understand. I can wait. I would... if you didn't want..."

"Angel, shut up!" I snap. "Don't you dare go on about me not wanting 
you! I want to fuck you right now!" 

"Oh," Angel answers, staring at me wide eyed.

Okay, I didn't mean to shout, but he really pisses me off with the whole 
"woe am I and no one wants me" act.

"Look pet, I wanna mate with you. Yes, I know the little chit said it's 
dangerous, I already knew that I and I still want to. Okay?" I lean forward 
and take hold of Angel's large fingered hand. His skin is smooth under my 
touch, and I rub my thumb into the palm of his hand. Angel moans softly 
at my touch and I grin.

"Yes, Spike," he whimpers, as I continue to stroke his hand. 

He's so easy!

"I want it now, luv," I tell him, continuing my soft movements.

"N-now?" Angel stutters.

"Yeah, now," I repeat. 

Angel's POV:

Spike wants to mate with me... now?! I stare for a long moment at his 
serene face. There's no worry in his eyes, or fear. He's not afraid. While 
me - I'm bloody terrified - using Spike's phrase. Mating rituals are very 
rare in vampire society. Many have tried, but so few have succeeded in 
actually completing the whole ritual. I've never even met a mated pair. 
They say that we become even more powerful. That it's possible to gain 
power from the dark world, as the ritual takes place. 

The dark world is what we call the place we go to during the ritual. It's 
very hard to understand. Darla told me about the rituals long ago, but even 
she didn't comprehend it all. I know we have to prepare ourselves, and 
then we move into what many cultures call the vision quest or 
dreamscape. We will be challenged - in what way - I have no idea. No 
one's lived to tell Darla what happened after that.

"Now?" I repeat again. 

Spike looks at me as if I've grown a third eye and then he grins. "You're 
just as scared as the witch is, aren't you, luv?" 

"I'm not... yes," I whisper softly. It's true, I'm scared and totally unsure if 
this is the right thing to do. "I want this, Spike. I want to mate with you."

"Then that's all that matters, Angel-baby," Spike answers, huskily. 

Now this is new. Spike gets to his feet and stands before me. His long, 
dark duster drops to the ground and he kneels between my legs. He pushes 
them further apart until we are chest to chest. His slim, long fingers slide 
over my thighs and rest at my waist.

"Were do you... want to... do it," I pant. I swear he's setting me on fire 
with just these light touches.

"The forest, under the moon as you should know."

"Hmmmm..." I reply. Spike's gentle fingers move higher, as if to unfasten 
my shirt, but then he moves away. "Spike!" I growl. I want his fingers 
back - touching me - damn well undressing me!

"Later luv, you know you should only have sex after the wedding," he 
shouts back, as he waltzes into Willow's kitchen.

Damn, Childe!

Spike's POV:

Ahh! Food! I grab some marshmallows, chocolates, chips, soda, and 
whiskey. Want more could you want for a wedding feast? Oh god! I've 
got to stop thinking that word! Vampires don't have weddings! They have 
dangerous, blood letting rituals! Okay?!

Right, dangerous rituals, where one, or both of the participants could die. 
Oh bugger! What have I got myself into?!

Yet, I won't show Angel I'm as scared shitless as he is. I'm the Big Bad! I 
might have a chip, but I'm not ensoul-ed or anything.

"Okay, it's tonight."

At first his voice startles me, but then I relax into my Sire's strong 
embrace. His hard, tall body presses against my back, and I have to grin at 
the little problem I've left him with. His shaft presses into the crease of 
my butt, rubbing against the rough denim.

"Right-o! I've got the food, you can get the knives," I answer, quickly 
moving out off his embrace. I've really got to get a hold of myself. We 
need all our strength for the ritual - not a quick shag before hand.

Angel sighs when he realizes that he's not going to get a hold of my hot 
little bod. He grabs his bag and pulls out a pair of long, sharp, silver 
knives. Then a long object wrapped in bearskin. Now that peaks my 
interest, because it smells damn bad.

"What's that?" I ask, as I pop some chips into my mouth.

Angel grins and carefully lays the object on the table. "I managed to save 
these from the Master's caves," he answers. He unwraps the objects and 
reveals four incredibly long teeth. "They are said to be teeth from the 
original demon that created the vampire race. In the ritual you can use 
ivory copies, but I wanted... well, I wanted to do ours right."

Damn, he makes it sounds like they are our wedding rings. "There're 
perfect, luv," I reply, giving a little shudder. Oh shit, I do not like this one 
bit. Those teeth are enormous, and sure to damn well hurt!

Angel rewraps the teeth, collects the knives, and gathers up a couple of 
Willow's blankets. I stuff the food into a plastic bag. "Ready pet?"

"Yes, m' ionin," Angel replies. His use of Irish Gaelic always softens me. 
I actually think I love him more each time he says those words. His dark 
eyes find mine, and I see how much he does want this. 

Wow! I've never noticed how expressive Angel's eyes are. They are large, 
wide and soft. Dark brown - just like swirling chocolate. I let my eyes 
travel down to his straight nose, and then his perfect moist lips. I lick my 
own just thinking about kissing his mouth. I think about how perfect they 
would be attached around my cock. I groan, and realize I'm sporting my 
own hard-on. Damn! He didn't even have to touch me and I'm rock hard. I 
suddenly grin, what is it going to be like when we are mated? Will he only 
have to walk into the room to make me want to shag him?

Angel holds out his hand to me as we leave Willow's home. For a 
moment, I hesitate. I'm not a girl, and I won't be treated as one. 

Oh bugger! I stretch out my own hand and take his. His large fingers curl 
around mine and he leads us forward. Though the back garden and away 
from the houses, towards the Sunnydale forest.

Angel's POV:

We move quickly away from the light of the houses and deep into the 
small forest. The woods grow thick, hiding the moon. I start to wonder 
where Spike is taking me, and then we arrive in a little opening. I gasp at 
the perfection. Large shrouding trees surround the grassy knoll, the 
greenery creating a beautiful back drop to our ritual. In the center, is a 
flattened area with a small burned circle in the grass. I suppose the local 
youth like coming here, too.

"Go get some firewood, luv," Spike suggests, as he drops the food bag, 
and takes the other items from me.

I nod, wordlessly, and take off into the trees. I quickly get a large bundle 
together and return to Spike. I'm amazed by him. He's arranging the 
blankets, getting out the knives, and unwrapping the teeth. I'm shocked at 
how he's acting. He's helping. Setting things up, and telling *me* how to 
make a fire. I hand him the firewood. He grins at me and sets it out, 
pulling his lighter from his duster pocket to light it.

A small blaze starts and then catches the dried wood. The fire burns bright 
and for a moment we both just stare into the flickering flames.

"We should begin..." I start.

"Yes," Spike answers, softly. His voice totally different to what I'm used 
to. Husky and refined.

I slowly stand and start to unbutton my shirt. In seconds, deft fingers stop 
me.

"Let me, luv," Spike murmurs.

I nod, and his fingers slide up to my shirt buttons. He flicks them open 
easily, moving down my chest until he reaches the bottom and pulls it 
open. He pushes the cotton from my shoulders, and then runs his hands 
over my abs to reach the end of my T-shirt. I sigh, biting my lip, at his 
gentle, feather-like touch. Spike's eyes seem to gleam as he pulls my T-
shirt apart with a loud rendering rip. I growl in reply at him ripping my 
shirt, but I don't stop him. He pushes it from my shoulders, throwing it to 
the ground.

"Oh, pet," he sighs, "your so fucking perfect." He reaches up, running thin 
fingers over my chest. He strokes my nipples; palming each one, then 
moving on to caress the indentation of my navel. I groan loudly, as he 
moves lower and starts to unzip my jeans. His fingers catch the waistband 
and he pulls them down. My cock flings free, erect and dripping.

"Hmmm, happy to see me, luv?" he whispers. He licks his lips at the sight, 
and I shudder with desire.

"Oh, Spike," I reply in a lustful moan.

I'd be begging him to touch me, if we could. This ritual isn't about sex... 
yet. I lift my leg, as he pulls off my jeans, followed by shoes and socks. 
Finally, I'm naked and Spike steps back.

"You're gonna be mine, pet," he informs me, as if I were I five year old. 
His voice is so sure about what's happening.

I wish I could return the favor. Yet, I'm terrified. Spike doesn't seem to be 
affected by this ritual. Maybe it's the lack of soul... but I don't think so. 
Spike's so full of human emotions and reactions. 

"You going to undress me, poof?" he raises. 

He smiles and uses that word I despise. It's not in anger this time. He's 
playing with me. 

"I think I could manage that," I answer with a grin of my own, "bleach 
boy."

Spike gives a little laugh and lifts his scared eyebrow. I glide towards him 
slowly, watching his eyes as he takes me in. I can feel myself blushing, as 
he gives my naked body the once over. His gaze lingering on my erect 
length. He licks his lips again, and I'm wishing that he could me licking 
me instead. I bring my hands to his shoulders and push his leather duster 
back. It slips from his shoulders, and I give a tug, pulling his arms free. 
The leather drops to the floor, and Spike sighs.

Next, I remove his red shirt. I can't resist anymore. Spike's making all 
these sighs and his eyes! They are driving me insane. I lean forward and 
kiss his lips.

"Naughty luv." He laughs and leans back, away from my face.

I pull a face, which only makes him chuckle more, but return to the job at 
hand. I lift his T-shirt, pulling it over his head and drop it on the growing 
pile of clothing. I love his naked chest. The solid muscles, the pale flesh, 
the pink nipples, and the ribs that are clearly defined. I slide my hands 
down his firm muscles, catching the top of his tight - oh so tight, black 
jeans. I unzip them, watching as his dick of pale flesh pokes out of the 
hole. Looks like I'm not the only one who's anxious.

I have to pull myself away from his cock, stopping myself from sucking it 
in. I push his jeans down to his ankles, and then struggle to untie his Docs. 
He laughs as I huff, tying to unpick all the damn knots he puts in them. 
Instead of trying, I use vampire strength and just shred the laces. 

"Hey, them's me Docs! I've had them for twenty years!"

Yeah, right! More like two, Spike's clothing hasn't been looked after all 
that well. He doesn't fold them, wash them or anything. He wears and 
wears until they fall off, and then buys - err, steals - more just the same. 
No taste, my Childe.

Spike's POV:

Oh bugger, Angel's so bloody gorgeous with the moonlight shining off his 
pale skin. Yet, it's not as white as mine is. Angel's skin has a tanned look; 
it's his brown pigments. Makes his little nipples brown too. Damn, I'd 
love to lick my tongue around them right now! Suck on them, make them 
hard and bite... Nope, I can't. The ritual can't be sexual to start with.

Angel finishes removing my shoes, and then rises to his feet. I look up into 
lust glazed eyes, and realize he's having problems keeping his hands off 
me too. I smile at him, noticing that worry is returning to his features. I 
can tell he's scared shitless by this. It surprises me. I'd always thought 
Angel was so strong, and unafraid of everything. Yet, I don't show the 
fear I might have. I want this. I want him.

For a long moment, we don't move. Just stare. Stare at each other's naked 
bodies. Damn, he's big. I give him another luscious grin and he blushes 
again. I just can't get over blushing Angel. Humans couldn't tell, but I 
can. 

"Are you ready?" Angel asks, and I draw my gaze away from his heavenly 
bod. His voice is more than nervous.

"Yep," I answer, assuredly.

Angel gives a shaky smile, and leads me over to the fire. He picks up the 
large teeth. I shiver at the sight, but smile back at him. I won't show him, 
but I'm dreading this part. It's not that I don't like pain, because I do... it's 
just that. Well, there... Oh shit, I've got to do this.

Angel hands me the first tooth. I take it gingerly. 

"Do it now," Angel says, preparing himself. His body tense and rigid. I 
take a deep breath and plunge the razor sharp tooth into his chest muscle, 
pushing it straight down.

"Argh!" Angel screams, his body arching in agony. He manages to keep 
standing, and tries to hold back more cries of pain. I continue to push the 
tooth down, shoving it into his chest muscle. It glides under his skin and 
then I tilt it. Blood spurts from a second hole as the tip of the tooth breaks 
through the skin. I remove my shaking hand and stare at my Angel's 
bloodied chest. There in his right pectoral is the large, sharp, demon tooth. 
Blood flows from the wound, covering his front.

For a moment, Angel rocks on his feet and I'm afraid he's going to fall.

"I'm okay..." he mumbles. 

I pick up the next tooth and place it in Angel's trembling hand. I shudder 
at the sight. I prepare myself for the pain, biting my lip. Angel takes a firm 
hold of the tooth, and brings it down quickly.

Fuck!! I feel as though I'm being staked, as Angel shoves the tooth 
through my ab muscle, exactly in the same place as his. This part of the 
ritual is necessary. It's a bloodletting, a sacrifice to the dark power. We are 
vampires, and blood is all we are. 

Angel's POV:

I scream in agony, as Spike impales me on the second tooth. I take up his 
second and repeat the action. Now both sides of our chests are pieced with 
a large demon fang. Blood flows over our skin, and I feel myself weaken. 
This is the first part of the ritual. The blood letting. Vampires have a belief 
in what we call the dark power. It's the original power that created all 
vampires - the first demon. It's believed that power exists in each and 
every vampire, it is the spark of un-life that creates our individual demon. 
The blood letting sacrifice is to awaken that dark power within us. To bind 
us to the first - the beginning.

"Spi... ke..." I cry suddenly, as my feet give way. I fall to the grass, my 
vision darkening. I try to steady myself, with my hands, but my skin is 
slick with blood and I collapse into the grass. Seconds later, I feel a body 
fall beside me. 

"An.. gel..." He gasps, trying to call to me through the blinding pain.

My body starts to spasm. I try to cry out to Spike. I can't! My mouth is 
frozen. Oh crap!

Spike's POV:

What the hell? One second I'm lying bleeding on the ground next to 
Angel, and the next, I'm lying in a green field with the...

"Fuck!! Sunlight!" I scream.

I jump up, looking for cover, and then suddenly realize that I'm not 
burning up. I start to jump around, because this is all new and... Hey! 
Where's Angel?

I look around desperately trying to find my Lover. Is this the real world? 
Am I immune to sunlight? Or...

Just under a tree, not far from me I notice a crouched figure.

"Angel!"

I run across the field towards the tree. I can make out my Sire crouched 
below the branches. He scared of the light I realize.

"Will!" he shouts suddenly. Dark eyes find mine, and he holds a hand out. 
"The sun!"

"Angel, the sun doesn't hurt!" I cry, collapsing on my knees before him.

"What?" His cool hands searches over my body, looking for burns. He 
finds none. "But the sun!"

"I know, but it's not burning, Angel. Try it." I tighten my hand around his 
and pull at his reluctant body. He shivers, but rises to his feet. "Trust me, 
luv."

I pull Angel forward and he steps into the light. First his hand and foot, 
and then the rest of his heavenly body. He gasps as the sunlight caresses 
his skin. I gasp to. Fuck, he's so damn hot! I reach up with my free hand 
and run my fingers across his brown chest. Hey! He's suntanned!

There are no signs of the demon teeth, no scars or blood, just whole, 
healthy human looking skin. I run my fingers across his chest, picking up 
the feeling of warmth and then rest over his left nipple. Hs heart is 
beating!

"You're alive."

Angel's POV:

Alive? 

I don't feel it. I don't feel any different to what I did before the blood 
letting.

I lift my hand, resting it on my chest. Nothing. I'm cool and still very 
dead.

"I'm still dead, Spike," I answer. I touch his chest and gasp. Spike is still 
pale, but his skin has this healthy blush, and when I touch him, I can feel 
his heat. "No, you're alive."

"Don't be stupid, Mate," Spike laughs, "I'm no... Sire, what's going on?" 
Since this ritual began, Spike actually looks worried.

I shake my, "I don't know. I don't know what happens next. Darla told me 
about the blood letting, but she didn't know anyone who had returned 
from the next step."

"We're in a dreamscape kinda place then?" 

"Yes, I assume so."

"So why would I want you human?" Spike asks me, totally confused.

I laugh nervously, "Why would I want you human?"

"So err... what happens now then?" Spike questions again. He looks 
around the peaceful landscape.

"I don't know," I reply.

I haven't a clue what happens next. This is not what I expected. Here we 
stand in the middle of a green field, with the sun shining. Spike says I'm 
alive, but my senses are telling me I'm the dead one. I can't imagine what 
this has to do with a vampire mating ritual. I was thinking - fire and 
brimstone. A little of hell, or something along those lines.

"We just stand here then?" Spike presses closer to me, his face brushing 
my chest.

"Maybe," I groan. His touch is electric. It burns my cool skin.

"You're so warm," Spike mumbles into my flesh. His tongue flicks out 
and laps the nearest nipple. "You taste good, luv." Spike takes the nipple 
into his mouth and starts to suck.

I groan loudly, my hand slipping up his body to cup his head, holding him 
firmly to my chest. Oh bugger, this feels so good! Spike's warm tongue 
starts to lap at my skin, his teeth nibbling at my male teat. We continue to 
hold hands, our fingers massaging each other...

Suddenly, a rumble of thunder echoes around us. The ground trembles, 
and starts to crumble beneath our feet.

"Shit!" Spike yells.

"Spike!" I scream as the land beneath my feet falls away. I lose my grasp 
on his hand and I fall. Spike yells, trying to reach for me, but I'm beyond 
his reach. I fall... and fall.

Spike's POV:

"Angel! Angel!"

Thunder rumbles around me, making the ground shake. Angel fell into a 
deep ravine and I can't see him anymore. The landscape is falling away, 
but the ground beneath my feet is solid. The sun vanishes above me, 
leaving nothing but darkness. There is no moon, nor stars, but there is light 
from somewhere.

"Angel!" I scream down into the ravine. He doesn't answer.

"Shit!" I yell. I'm naked and alone. I have no protection, and I've even 
lost Angel.

"Well, well, you're fucking useless, aren't you, roller boy?"

I gasp at the sound of that voice, getting to my feet and looking around 
frantically. Nothing! No one's here.

"My little Spikey,"

"Dru!" I yell, spinning around looking for her.

"I've come home, my luv," she replies. I turn and turn, and then...

There before me stands my beloved Drusilla. She's dressed in that 
beautiful black dress. It fits her so perfectly, flowing and tight in all the 
right places.

"We can be together, my Spikey." She reaches out to touch me, her fingers 
brushing my skin. They are so cold!

"You fucking left me!" I yell at her, "just go back to your bloody chaos 
demon!"

"We can be one!" she cries, reaching for me again. Her fingers brush my 
cock, and in second I'm limp. 

It's an incredibly strange feeling. I've never had that trouble with Angel. 
I've been hard and desperate for him nearly everyday since....

Angel.

Shit, this is a test!

"Fuck off!" I bellow at Drusilla shoving her back. She vanishes before she 
hits the ground. I move back to the ravine and kneel again. 

"Angel!" I scream.

"Spike!"

Yes! He can hear me. I try and find a handhold in the edge of the ravine, 
but there's none. The rock is as smooth as glass. I can't reach him! I 
would have to jump to get down there.

"Angel!" 

"Spike, thank god you can hear me! Oh, Spike, Darla was here. You 
should be careful!"

Ah, sounds like he's had his own visitor too.

"Already had one pet," I shout back, "got rid of her!"

"Me too," he replies, a sound of pride in his voice. "Can you find a way 
down?"

"No! The rock is like glass... Angel! I hear something! What's 
happening!"

Angel's POV:

There is a rumbling all around me - as if the air itself is speaking. The air 
sparks and the rumbling gets even louder... and louder... and LOUDER!

"Spike!" I yell, feeling as though my eardrums are going to crack. A light 
flashes, and then there is darkness. "Spike," I scream again.

"Right here," I almost jump out of my skin, as his voice sounds right 
behind my ear. Surely... Just a second ago... Oh, I give up. This place is 
too weird! "Angel, do you know what's happening?"

"No, I haven't got a clue. I think we're just going to have to take things as 
they come." I reach out into the darkness, and I touch his hand. He clasps 
mine, and we hold onto each other tightly.

"So! You're finally here." A voice booms out in the unending darkness. 

I try to strain my eyes, looking around, but I can't make anything out, not 
even with my vampire eyesight. I feel Spike's other hand grab my arm and 
I can tell he's trying to see too.

"Who are you?" I call out.

"You are the seer. The other is your soul."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Spike yells. He's scared and he 
hates feeling that. I touch his hand on my arm, trying to get him to calm 
down.

"Yes," I answer. I try and tell Spike through our touch to be quiet. "I guess 
I'm the seer now, and I also have a soul. Spike is..."

"Your lover. The keeper of your sanity and your soul. You came to mate 
with him. To be bound."

"Yes," I reply. 

The silence lasts for minutes on end, maybe even an hour. During that 
time, I take Spike in my arms and hold him tight. He's so afraid. I can 
smell it, feel it. He hates this, ever since he was born as a vampire and had 
to dig himself out of grave, he can't stand total darkness. I remember it 
well, awaking in your grave, the smell of disturbed earth, the weight of it 
all around you, and the total darkness. Six feet under, not a speck of light 
gets in. That's why you dig, and dig hard, you need the light more than the 
food, and when you emerge, it's like standing under the blessed sun. It's 
so bright and pure, the night touches you and you are one with it forever.

"It is time, you must choose."

"Time? Time for what? Who the fuck are you?" Spike screams, his nerves 
getting the better of him.

Suddenly, before Spike can finish his sentence, we're standing in an 
Victorian living room... no wait, it's later than that... and before us sits an 
old man. He's Spike's height, wearing small wire glasses with pure blue 
eyes. He stares from his seat into a burning fire. He could be around 70, 
and beside him he has a paper and pen. I look down and notice the flowing 
script I recognize, and a book of poems.

"Sire, look. That book, it says poems by William Montague. That's me! 
But hey, I'm bloody old!"

"You're human," I reply.

Spike gives me the strangest look, but before he can say anything more, a 
door opens and a hoard of children charge in. 

"Grandpa! Grandpa! Come see! Cathy's going to put the angel on the tree! 
Grandpa!" The children grab the old man's hands and pull him from his 
chair. He laughs with them, his face a mask of lines - lines of joy. Then we 
are alone again. The door shuts and darkness closes in.

"What the fuck was that about?"

"It was your life, William, the life you would have had had I not killed 
you." My eyes fill with tears when I think about the life I have denied my 
Childe. The family, the children, the masses of grandchildren. He would 
have died a happy old man. For the first time, I wonder... did I do right in 
denying him that.

The next second, light returns and we're standing in an alley. 

"Oh lord," I cry.

"Sire?" Spike turns to me, that odd look still in his eyes.

"I was turned here," I look around - everything is the same - perfect. I 
shall never forget this place; it was my last dying memory. The moment I 
regret all my life. My accepting of Darla's proposal. I wanted what she 
offered, and said yes, even before I knew what the deal was. I was an 
incredibly stupid child.

From the far corner of the alley, I hear a voice. It's me... talking to my 
friend. I'm saying something about my father's silver. Then footsteps, I 
turn and spot Darla standing at the end of the alley. 

"I have to stop this." I step forward, walking towards my Sire.

"What!" Spike cries, grabbing my arm. "What the fuck do you mean? Stop 
this..." His eyes widen in understanding. "You want to stop yourself from 
becoming a vampire, don't you? Because... because you saw me... an old 
man with a family... Oh god, you feel guilty for turning me!" He slaps me 
hard, and I'm so shocked I can hardly move. "You self-centered bastard!"

"Spike... Will, you could have a life, a family, just like you should have 
done." There are tears in my eyes. I killed him - I killed my boy.

"I don't want to fucking grow old - Gods, who wants wrinkles? I certainly 
don't want bloody kids either." He grabs my arms and shakes me. "I want 
you! I want this life. Yes, for the first 120 odd years it was bloody shit, but 
now... now, I have you. We can be together; you can make me happy, 
Angel. Please, don't take that away from me!" He strokes my cheek, his 
eyes wide with tears. "I want you, Angel. Please, don't leave me again."

"Oh Will," I kiss him, crushing our lips together, our tongues stroking 
each other. The scene around us fades and darkness returns.

"I guess that was the right decision," Spike comments, breaking away 
from my lips. 

"Or the wrong one... we could be here forever."

"Damn, Angel. You are so pessimistic." 

I can almost see him roll his eyes at me. I am not so sure about things as 
he is. I have no idea what or why this is happening. Surely, it cannot be 
right to kill, and be killed? I don't know - maybe in love there is no right 
or wrong.

The darkness changes and another scene appears. "Oh not again," Spike 
moans.

This time, the time scene is recent. We're stranding in the Mansion at 
Sunnydale. Before us is a statue of Acathla. There is a sound of fighting, 
and I gasp as it draws nearer. It's Angelus and Buffy, swords clashing, and 
throwing insults at each other. I know the outcome of this. Spike doesn't. 
He wasn't here.

"This is that time... I ran away with Dru..." he mumbles.

"It's nothing... Don't look." I reply. I can't do this again. My chest is 
tightening with fear. I know so well what's going to happen to me, I still 
have the nightmares. I start to tremble. Angelus is before Acathla, ready to 
strike and then... it happens. I - sorry, the soul - is returned to that body.

"So that's what happened, the witch re-installed your soul. But how... how 
did you close the portal?"

I can't watch, but I can't draw my eyes away either.

Buffy's crying, she knows what she has to do. I was so confused; I didn't 
know what was happening. She tells me to close my eyes, and I sob.

"What the fuck!" Spike cries, he's staring at Buffy, she kisses me, and 
then draws back the sword. I can almost feel the coming pain. "No!"

Spike dives across the room, he's shoving me out the way of the sword, 
and it slices through his flesh.

"Spike!" The vortex continues to open, and Spike grasps at the sword 
running through his chest. "Spike!" I kneel before him, grabbing his face.

"She sent you though the portal, didn't she? Oh god, Angel, I didn't know. 
Why didn't you tell me? You went to hell," he's sobbing. Drawing great 
gasps of breath, trying to get his words out. The scene around us starts to 
fade, the sword, and the blood vanishes, but still my boy weeps. "How 
long?"

"On Earth - a couple of months. There... a few hundred years."

"Hundred?" he gasps. "They tortured you?"

"Yes. When I came back, I couldn't even remember my name. Buffy 
found me and helped me back to normal, but nothing was the same 
between us. I loved her, but deep down, I don't think I could ever really 
forgive, and neither could she."

"I love you," he whispers.

"I love you too, my Childe." We kiss again.

"You have shown your worth. You would give you lives for each other, 
without question."

We are surrounded by darkness again, deep and unforgiving. All we can 
do is cling to each other.

Spike's POV:

I stand in darkness, my arms wrapped around my trembling Sire... no, 
Lover. He's my lover. I press him close, feeling him shiver. I know what 
he's thinking, the same as I am. We can't change the past because we 
wouldn't be here then, but it doesn't mean... hell, I do regret it. I regret 
leaving him to be ensoul-ed and sent to hell. I regret that I never thought 
of what was going to happen to him, and now I'm stuck with the 
knowledge that I helped send him to hell. They tortured him there... not 
just for months or years, but decades and centuries.

He must be thinking too, about killing me, turning me.

"You are the soul, and the seer!"

It's a new voice, deeper this time, and it echoes around me. I hate being 
called the soul - I'm an evil blood-sucking demon, thank you very much. I 
might be chipped but I'm still bad!

"Who the fuck are you! I've had enough of this shit!"

"You are always impatient, lover," the voice replies.

"Angel?" What the fuck is going on.

"That's me... That other voice... was you?" Angel comments, trying to see 
into the darkness. We can't, all there is the voice and blackness.

"We are the essence of you; we had to know you were deserving before 
we merged," the Spike voice tells us.

"Merge?" I whisper.

Suddenly, a wind engulfs us. It blows around us like a whirlwind, and we 
cling to each other. The wind blows harder, and it beings to shift away the 
darkness. It whirls around in the wind, revealing a summer field; the wind 
swirls around us, moving in circles and widens. I realize we're standing in 
the eye of a hurricane. Suddenly, through the whirling winds, two animals 
appear. Angel steps out of my arms, and stands before me, I shove him 
aside so we are side by side. Bugger's always trying to protect me. If 
we're going to be mates, then he's going to have to accept we are equal.

The animals surprise me, one is a silver-coated Wolf, and the other, sitting 
on its shoulder, is an eagle. They stare at us, standing just a couple of feet 
away, not moving.

"Your guides agree with you."

"What?" Angel grabs my hand and we look around. Nothing again, but 
those blasted voices.

"They are your spirit guides; this is the last test. They accept you, if they 
didn't, they would leave. They wait to be merged with you."

"Where the fuck are.... Wow!"

I can't believe my eyes. Before is a being of gold and blue. So beautiful, 
dark eyes, dark hair, and I realize that this is Angel. He's like... like... an 
angel.

"You are the Wolf, Spike," the being... Angel says. Damn, he's so 
gorgeous... I didn't think demons were... "Just because we are demon 
doesn't mean we have to be ugly. Are all good people pretty?" The Angel 
angel laughs. His whole body shimmers with light. Whole, naked and so 
damn gorgeous - he's ethereal... that's all I can say. There aren't words 
enough to explain his beauty. 

"No," I mumble, my eyes unable to leave his form, "Why the wolf?"

"You're his protection, his one and only mate. He yearns for you, and only 
for you. You have to be strong, fast and vicious, to help him through the 
coming trials. That is the gift of your bonding."

Gift? What gift? Like a wedding present, maybe. I don't understand, but 
the being says nothing more. Instead, I turn back the flesh and bone 
version of my lover. Damn, if he isn't just as good looking.

Angel's POV:

I stay silent as my essence talks to Spike, it seems that what he has to say 
is for Spike and Spike alone. I don't understand it, myself. I've never 
heard of gifts, I wonder what these spirits mean.

"You are the eagle, Angel."

I guess it's my turn. I turn to face the handsome - mind-blowing-ly 
ethereal form of my lover. If I were human, my heart would have stopped 
in wonder. I would have died happy.

"You are the guardian of good people. You are also the primary 
messenger of spirits to man. The protector of the weak, and also the seer. 
You are one in the Eagle, with the wolf you are bound and he shall protect 
you where you fly."

His glowing hand reaches out to touch my cheek, making the real Spike 
growl softly. "You are the center, don't be afraid to ask for help. You are 
not alone anymore, you are bonded to your chosen mate, and forever shall 
you belong together. She who is your strength, the one Willow, she is the 
connection to the human world. She shall walk with you for eternity, on 
this path you have chosen. Care for her, protect her from darkness."

"I shall," I promise. I don't understand the strange words. Willow is light 
and everything good about humans; I don't see how she can ever do 
anything to hurt anyone. Yet, I promise because I love her, and she is part 
of me.

"She shall grow in strength; she is a fellow warrior on this journey."

"Now it is time." It's the Angel being that speaks. He looks at his counter 
part and smiles. "We are ready."

"For what? What the hell is going on," Spike's getting angry. He hates all 
this mumbo jumbo stuff. He's never been into spirituality or Wicca. I have 
never known a being so wrapped up in the real world as Spike's. I grab his 
arm and pull him to me. For a moment, he struggles, but then relaxes into 
my embrace. 

We stand back, as the two beings start floating towards each other. They 
smile and kiss, and... merge. Their bodies are becoming one as we watch, 
and then all disappears as the whole field is filled with brightness and even 
the whirling winds glow. The animals come nearer and they stand before 
us. I wish I could talk to Spike, but a humming... no chanting has started. I 
feel like I'm in the middle of a cowboy and Indian film from the sound. I 
hear stamping feet, drums, men's voice's echoing all around us. It's so 
loud!

My arms tighten around Spike, and we cling to each other. Then the 
animals become ghost like, and move straight in for the attack. 

"Holy shit!" I cry! The eagle is flying directly for my heart. I scream, 
trying to push it away, but my fingers can't even touch it - they just pass 
right through. It enters my body - a feeling of sunlight, heat, and flight fill 
my body. I scream. Beside me, Spike is the same. The wolf pounces at 
him, flinging itself into his body. He yells and screams, but I can't hear 
anything. The chanting, the drums, the stomping it's too loud!

The light gets brighter and brighter and...

"Holy shit!" I cry. I push myself up and yelp in pain. It's dark and I'm 
lying in a forest. I touch my hand to my chest and moan... we're back in 
the real world. Buried deep inside my chest muscles are two demon fangs. 
The skin around them is healed and whole, I'm covered in blood, but I'm 
not hungry. Oh god, Spike!

"Angel?" I turn quickly, facing my Childe...no, not Childe anymore. Mate. 
He's my mate.

(note: ~~ Angel's thoughts. // Spike's)

~~Oh god, Spike, I love you, I can never lose you. ~~

"I can't lose you either, luv." Spike grins at me under dark lashes, a slight 
pink blush to his pale cheeks.

"Huh?" I'm sure I didn't say anything. I look over him and notice he's in 
the same position as I am - the demon fangs still imbedded in his chest.

//Damn, I want to fuck him. I want to suck that big fat cock. I want to push 
inside his tight body, oh yeah; I'll be his first. My little virgin boy. //

"I am not your virgin boy!" I snap.

Spike starts to laugh, rolling on the floor, and yelping occasionally as the 
fangs in his chest are knocked about.

"What the fuck are you laughing at! And I don't have a fat cock, either!!" 
I'm screaming now, my body shaking in anger.

//You have a fucking gorgeous cock, Luv. Big, fat, and lots of lovely veins 
to lick along. And that foreskin, damn I want to pull it and suck...//

"Shut up!" I yell, grabbing his shoulders.

"I didn't say a damn word, luv," Spike giggles. "Oh come on Angel, you 
are really slow."

~~Oh shit, you can read my mind! ~~

//Yep, I sure can... Oooo, Angel, you sure are a kinky bugger. //

"Spike, get the fuck out of my thoughts!" I bellow. He does, and strangely 
I can feel him leaving my mind. In the end, he's just a flicker of light deep 
inside me.

"Oh pet, I kinda like being in your mind. It's a nice... mucky place... 
though; I really don't look that good in jockey shorts...and I don't think 
Xander would like to be used as our rug, luv." My mate giggles even 
more, slapping his hand into the dirt.

"I dread being in your mind," I snap back, but that makes Spike laugh 
even more. 

I reach out and touch his laughing face, stroking my hand down his cheek. 
A shiver passes though my whole body, and I moan in delight. Spike's 
laughing stops too, and he pants with my caress. I look down at his cock, 
noticing how hard he is... just from one stroke?

"We need to complete the ritual, luv," he murmurs. He leans closer to me, 
his face inches from mine. I want to kiss him, but I know if I do, I'm going 
to lose myself completely inside him and never come out the other end.

"We need to remove the fangs..." I mumble, my lips just millimeters from 
his. I can almost taste his mouth from here. his smell...

"Yeah," he breathes, leaning forward. 

The first touch of our lips and everything is lost. It feels like my whole 
body is burning, our lips are raging fire as they caress each other. I shove 
my tongue inside and feel myself flying.

// Want you, Angel. Please, let me touch you... I need to touch you. //

~~ Please, Spike, take me... take everything. ~~

I melt as Spike rolls on top of me, his mouth mapping out mine, and, 
"ow!"

"Shit, bloody fangs!" Spike jumps back, looking down at the ivory still 
buried in our chests. "Guess, you're right, luv. I don't think I want to shag 
you with these sticking in me." He laughs, then looks concerned. "How 
the fuck do we get them out?"

I smile at last something I know. "Someway special." I take hold of his 
hand and pull him forward. He gets to his feet, and follows me as I pull 
him towards the fire. "They are part of us now. It's simple." Spike rolls his 
eyes, knowing I'm getting a big head about it. I can't help but play him, 
make him guess. I pick up a long stick from the fire. "Don't worry, it shall 
only hurt for a moment." I press the fiery stick against his chest, touching 
the long fang. He howls at the touch and the ivory disintegrates, leaving 
nothing but a long pointed scar on his chest. I repeat it on the other side 
with the same result.

"Wow! Scars... cool!"

I sigh; Spike has a strange priorities. I hand him the stick and he repeats 
the ceremony on me. I look down at my healed chest, and see the two 
scars. I think he might be right, they are rather cool. I look up from under 
my lashes and smile. Spike gets this strange look in his eyes, and he stalks 
towards me, dropping the stick.

//You are so bloody sexy when you do that, pet. //

~~ What? You like a man who bats his eyelashes at you? ~~ I laugh inside 
my mind. I feel free talking to him this way. I can say things, and not 
worry about what people think, because only Spike can hear me. My mate 
is the only one in my mind.

I bat my eyelashes again, and he growls. A strange growl... almost Wolf 
like... Then I can't think anymore, because he bounds at me, shoving me 
to the ground. We roll together in the dirt, our mouths connecting. He's 
growling again, and pushes his cock into my stomach.

//Not right...I want to mount you...//

Shit! He's really got that wolf part in him. Not only did I receive the 
words, but the image. That silver furred wolf was mounting me from 
behind, his cock parting my anus. I give him my own growl. That image 
was the most arousing idea I've ever had. I quickly shimmy out from 
under him, and present my back. I'm on all fours, and I growl softly, 
shaking my backend. I don't pick up thoughts from Spike now, just 
emotions... and he's so turned on it's unbelievable. I stretch my back, 
arching it, heightening my ass... and that does it.

Spike dives onto me, his cock jabbing at my opening. I moan at the 
bestiality of the situation. Spike's thoughts are just one raging fire inside 
him. He sees me as a shining being - his mate. His only mate. My mate 
grunts, a soft growling of need filling my ear. He scrapes his nails over my 
nipples, and I can smell he's drawn blood. The smell drives his instincts, 
and he starts to lap at my throat. Exchanging blood is the last part of our 
ritual. It shall make us completely one. A bond-mated pair of vampires. 
Something I've never come across before.

I am so not telling Giles about this. I'll never hear the end of it, and then 
he'll want to study us, and....

"FUCK!" I scream. 

Spike thrusts forward and buries his cock deep within me. I've split, but I 
don't feel pain. I feel full and complete. Spike is the first and only person 
who shall ever do this. I groan, my body trembling with his invasion. He 
wraps his fangs around the nape of my neck and starts to thrust. It's then I 
discover why men like sex with men. Spike finds an amazing spot inside 
me. He constantly thrusts over it and into it, making me scream with the 
sensation each and every time. It feels as though my nervous system is on 
overload. I'm yelling incomprehensible words as he gets the right rhythm 
to hit it all the time! I can't take this anymore! 

His clawed hands grab my cock and he starts to squeeze me. I arch my 
back trying to get away from his touch. The sensations are too much - too 
powerful. My throat has become sore with the yelling, but he doesn't stop. 
He just pounds and pounds. He's still thrusting when I cum, screaming my 
climax into the night. The next minute, he sinks his fangs into my neck 
and starts to fill my passage with his cum. I never thought that Spike 
filling my bowels would be so erotic. I'm yell again as a secondary 
orgasm passes through my body, leaving me boneless in his grasp.

Spike's POV:

Oh wow... Oh wow... oh wow! That was... wow! I can't believe how 
amazing that felt. I've never had sex like that - Never! Never cum so hard, 
either. I bet I emptied a gallon load of jism into his backside. I need him so 
much, need to be connected to him, touch him, and be one with him. I 
took him like a wolf does his mate, mounted him from behind and fucked 
him raw. I think he liked it too, especially if all the howling, screaming, 
and double orgasm are anything to go by.

Finally, I collapse on top of his jelly-like body and we lie in the soft grass 
and leaves. I remove my fangs and clean his wound with my tongue. I've 
left a tiny scar on the back of neck, I wonder if it's going to stay there... I 
hope so; I love the scars on his body, the signs that we have mated.

I shift on top of him, feeling my cock start to harden once again inside his 
tight little passage. And boy it was tight in there, I thought he was going to 
squeeze my cock off. I guess I should have relaxed the muscles first, but I 
was too frantic to touch him to wait any longer. 

"Hmmm..." Angel moans under me. I try and see his face, and he turns to 
look at me. He's got the biggest smile fixed on his lips, looking like the 
cat that had the cream. "That was..." he mumbles, still grinning.

"Yeah," I gasp, resting my head on his back. There aren't words to 
describe how good it was.

I don't know how long we lay there, but I kept getting the feeling that 
surely it must be near dawn. Yet, there was no sign of the sun. So I just 
stayed where I was, I really didn't want to move... ever.

Angel was quite happy to remain where he was for a while, but then 
started shifting.

//Ah, pet... I don't wanna move...//

~~ I want you ~~

Okay, he only had to mention more, and I moved. He groaned as I slipped 
out of him. He was sore, but he didn't seem to take any notice. He wanted 
me and I sure as hell wasn't going to question it. We'll clean ourselves up 
later, hey, I'll even offer to lick him clean.

~~ Disgusting thoughts! ~~

// Get out me fucking mind then and fuck me! // I yelled back.

~~ Don't think I want to ~~ 

I could here him laughing inside my mind - bastard! He was playing with 
me. It's something he hasn't done for a long time. I wonder if we can take 
these games further. I'd love to be able to do some bondage again, or 
whipping, oh gods, I'd love to whip Angel... or even better - have him 
whip me. 

I groan and harden just at the thought. Bugger, I never thought I'd trust 
him like this. Hell, I want him to whip me, shag me blind, and tie me to 
the nearest bed. I guess our mating worked then. This is more than love - 
this is everything.

~~ Can you mount me again, after... ~~

Angel leans over me, his lips inches from mine. I'm surprised he wants 
that violent taking again. Surely, he's sore.

// Pet, I don't want to hurt you...//

~~ You didn't. You made me feel whole, safe, and wanted. I've never felt 
that Spike... Hell, yes I want you to take me like that again! ~~

Okay, not what I expected from Angel. I thought he'd want soft loving, 
long drawn out passion. I suppose my claiming - my holding him so tight, 
and crushing him to me, made him feel whole and safe. I guess I can relate 
to that...

// I'll touch you anyway you want, lover. //

Angel grins at me, and then kisses with all his desire. He wants me close, 
and I give myself fully to him. It seems he can get on with making love to 
me, now he knows I'll fuck him ragged later. I laugh at the thought... Our 
kisses are becoming languid, his lips playing with mine. I wonder how he 
wants to play this... how...

~~ Spike, shut up and just go with it. I don't want you to think of 
anything, but what I'm doing to you. ~~

I chuckle, and kiss him back. He's so big pressed against me. His large 
build, his muscles, and that monster of a penis. Damn, I'm glad he's big 
all over. I press my hands against his chest and feel the muscles move 
under my hands. He grins and we kiss again. Our lips touch, and part, only 
to touch again. Soft touches, soft loving... and I like it. Oh good grief, I'm 
turning into the poof!

~~ Close your eyes, and stop thinking! ~~

I sigh, and close my eyes. I feel my lover above me. The soft grass under 
me. The night is strangely silent, as if in awe of our joining... or maybe 
shock. I wonder what he's doing? I lay back, enjoying the cool grass under 
me, and then he strokes my face. I gasp at the contact. His fingers are 
strong, slightly rough, and his nails are cut short. He strokes my skin, soft 
and hard touches over the surface. He moves to my neck, making me gasp, 
as another area is aroused and inflamed by his touch. Oh gods, his tongue 
moves into action, and he licks my chest. 

~~ You are beauty defined. A man of pale skin, strong muscles, and high 
cheekbones. Such bright blue eyes, and welcoming, soft mouth. I adore 
your mouth - your thin lips, your hot tongue. I like how you shove it into 
my mouth. ~~

Oh shit! What is he doing? I writhe under him, his touching moving over 
to my belly, down my arms, and finally caressing my hips. I've been 
touched before... hell, lots and lots of times, but never like this. I gasp, and 
push my hips up to his hands. I want him to bring me off, now! I can't 
hold back, I'm too fucking aroused.

~~ You have the most amazing stomach, flat and filled with ridges of 
muscles. Such muscles, Spike. I want to bury my hands in them, lick them 
all over. Your arms are thin, but your wrists... oh lover, they are so sexy. 
And your hands. They make me hard just by looking at them. Perfect, 
sculptured hands - I want them to touch me forever. The bones of your 
hips, pointed, and the way they rub against me when we make love... oh 
Spike, how they touch my pelvis, my stomach, they are needles of desire 
in my flesh. ~~

I groan, writing on the ground, my mate above me, touching me and 
driving me bloody insane! 

~~ Lastly, but not least, your legs. They are perfect; they wrap around me 
so well. They hold me like steel, and when you rub your heels into my 
ass... oh, you make me cum. ~~

Okay, I'm screaming now, and my wad covers my chest before I even 
realize I've climaxed. The orgasm that passed through my body was like a 
lightening storm. It burned every nerve, blinded me, deafened me, and 
drove me to the edge of sanity and back. I'm still screaming as I come 
down, my body cradled next to my lover's.

// Oh Angel... Angel. //

I cry, as he strokes me, this time not sexually but calmingly. Damn it, he 
never even touched my ass or cock. Never spoke about them, but I came 
like a horny teenager. I couldn't hold back, it was like... I don't have the 
words. I'm not the romantic, Angel should be, but whoa, that was the best 
orgasm I've ever had for... oh, for the last half an hour at least.

~~ You liked that? ~~

I grin and open my eyes. My mate looks down at me with the biggest 
smile on his face. I slap his arm and he laughs.

// What the hell was that? //

~~ That was a little bit of Tantric sex... well, only the sight part. Your not 
supposed to come from it, but I guess it was a little overwhelming for you. 
~~

He's laughing at me, that delightful chuckle inside my mind. Is that his 
gift? That feeling of making me feeling like I'm flying. Just as I take him 
hard and rough, making him feel full and safe. I stretch out next to him, 
resting my hand on his firm chest. That was really amazing, what he did to 
me. I wonder what it would be like with him inside me. I like him like 
this, relaxed and lying at my side. His hand resting on the flat of my 
stomach. His beautiful hard cock is poking me in the hip. I think we're 
both ready for an another round.

// So what else to they do in Tantric sex, apart from sight. //

~~ Well, they enhance the five senses, and then there's the one hour rule - 
to control desire. You don't have intercourse one hour before or after... ~~

"No fucking way!" I yell out loud. 

I roll Angel onto his back and loom over him. He chuckles softly; running 
his hands around my hips, and then up and down my back. I shiver and 
remember his words - words that made me cum like a cannon. I kiss his 
mouth, his words returning again. Friggin' hell, he is turning me into a 
poof! Now every time I touch him, I'll be remembering those damn words.

I can't help but give a whimsical little moan as his tongue slides into my 
mouth. A belly groan as his fingers caress my spine in long continuous 
strokes. A pansy-like whimper when he breaks away from my mouth to 
pepper kisses along my jaw. I am such a wimp!

~~Hmmmm... want you, lover. Want to feel you...~~

I grin, just want I wanted. I stroke my hands over his chest and grab hold 
of his cock. He's hard, and dripping. I just need a little more lubrication. I 
collect my spilt sperm from my chest and rub it onto his cock. Just the 
sight of it covering his length makes us both groan. He arches under me, 
and tries to pull me down for a kiss. I come willingly, wrapping my tongue 
around his. I lift my hips, and with a move I haven't done in nearly a 
century, impale myself on his dick.

We scream into each other's mouth. The bond between us makes our 
bodies flare with desire, and it burns us alive. Our bond brightens and 
glows inside my mind, and I reach out for my lover. I feel that same light 
within him, and we merge together. Damn, I'll never stop having sex with 
him now! This is too amazing!

We rock together, our mouths connecting to share sloppy kisses. Our 
hands clutching each other so close. Angel groans and moans, rolling us 
over in the damp grass. It's so soft under our bodies, like making love on 
clouds. The light inside our minds flares again, dragging us near and 
nearer - until I'm flying. I scream, yelling against Angel's mouth. I'm 
coming again, my orgasm like a supernova. It burns me from the inside 
out, just as it does my Angel. I feel him climax within me, and then his 
fangs are buried in the skin just above my right nipple. He's drinking me 
deep, swallowing me whole.

// Angel! //

~~ Spike! ~~

I collapse onto my mate's body. Our limbs heavy and sated. Oh bugger, I 
love him.

Angel's POV:

I don't know how long we lay entangled. Our bodies molded perfectly 
together. I love his body, what I whispered into his mind was all-true - 
every word. I suddenly wonder when the dawn is coming. It must have 
been hours since we started the ritual, it must be dawn soon... yet, and 
there is no sign of the sun.

I shift against Spike, my cock hard again, and uncomfortably crushed 
under his leg.

~~ Spike? ~~ I murmur into his relaxed mind. There is no answer. ~~ 
Spike! ~~

// Bloody hell, peaches! Don't shout into my head! //

~~ Spike, I'm horny... ~~ I whine.

Spike opens one eyes and glares at me. He' stiff with shock by my words. 
What? Does he think I don't know what it means? It's true, I am. I'm 
thinking about him taking me again. I move away from him, rolling onto 
my hands and knees, and wriggle my butt in his direction. I look behind 
me. Spike is shocked stiff, his mouth hanging open.

I whine, and push my butt up again, and by now my half wolf mate is 
salivating. He licks his lips, his eyes never leaving my ass. I give a little 
growl, and he pounces. Harsh fingers clutch my hips, as he rubs his 
erection into the cleft of my ass. Oh, take me! I want him again; I want to 
feel him fill me. I've never felt as I do when he takes me. His legs push 
mine more apart, and he growls into my ear. His chest relaxes onto my 
back, his hips rise, and then...

~~ Yes! Yes! Pound me hard! ~~

Spike's cock is buried within my body. He's home. He makes me whole, 
and I never want to move from this position ever again! Where I make us 
fly in sex, Spike brings him home. 

I feel myself howling as Spike's throbbing penis pushes deeper inside me. 
Each thrust connects us more and more. Each movement of his hips drives 
that amazing length directly into my prostate. If I had known about that 
wonderful little nub, I would have forced him to stimulate it for the last 
100 years.

// I should introduce you to a vibrating dildo, pet. // A voice laughs inside 
my mind. 

I groan at the tone, too aroused to be able to answer. I start to feel that 
blazing light in the back of my head again. It grows and soon it shall 
engulf us both in pleasure. I hear a wolf howling, his fangs nipping at my 
throat, paws shredding my chest... I think I'm losing my mind. The feeling 
is too intense. Then I let everything go. I scream, howl, blow my mind, 
and then the light is gone and I'm back in the arms of my mate.

// That was... //

~~ Oh yeah... ~~

// You think it's going to be like this all the time? //

~~ Spike, you are going to be the death of me... Ahh, death by pleasure 
spikes. ~~

// Angel, my lover, your jokes are crap. //

Spike's POV:

It's dawn. It feels like the night has lasted for days on end. Yet, as we lay 
in the afterglow of another round of love making and sharing blood, we 
both can feel the sun beginning to rise. Not even Angel can tell how long 
we've been awake. We dress, sharing kiss and touches, amazed at the 
newness of each other's bodies. Then at the end of the ritual, we buried the 
silver knives. They were to be used to end our lives if the bonding ritual 
failed. They weren't needed, so they were buried at the place of our 
mating.

Afterwards we gathered the rest of our stuff, and ran back to Willow's 
house. We just made it in time. The sun was chasing us across the grass; 
just cresting the horizon, as we ran through the door and slammed it shut 
behind us. We laughed, giggling like children, as we collapsed on the 
floor.

"Well, well, you're back."

We both look up into the displeased face of Willow. She taps an impatient 
foot on the floor; her face set in an angry mask.

"Where the hell have you been for the last 3 days?!" she yells. "I was 
worried sick! You weren't anywhere to be found. Then we had to deal 
with those Gentlemen people. They stole our voices. Then there were 
those blasted commandos around again. Tara said I was special. Then 
you... What?"

We both start to laugh. The ritual must have lasted for 3 days, and held us 
in some kind of special place to complete the bonding. Willow looks 
really pissed at our laughing, but Angel holds out his arms for her and she 
comes willingly. She hugs him so tight, feeling him all over. She's 
checking that he's whole, and then she touches my cheek.

"Oh goddess, I was so worried, Angel. Even for you, Spike. Please don't 
do that ever again. Please, promise me."

"I promise you, mo cumhacht." Angel kisses her forehead and holds her 
tighter.

//You can kiss her, lover. I'm not jealous of Willow. //

Angel gives me a surprised look.

// She's part of you. She'll help me keep you sane and alive. //

Angel smiles, and touches my cheek. He kisses Willow softly, comforting 
her, as we all cling together. I have a new family, a new pack. I wonder 
how long I can last before I piss them off again?

The End of no 4. 

Part 5 Coming Soon
So go bug the author at Shara-Nesu@supanet.com