"Oh God Taylor what am I going to say to them?" Fran said, walking out of the terminal with Taylor right by her side. They�d arrived in Tulsa three days later, and she was beginning to get nervous. "I have nothing against them but I can�t talk to them. I don�t know how they�ll react to me." She shook her hands out, trying to get the nervousness away.
"Frenchie, stop worrying about it. They love you more now then they did then. You know this whole hockey contract doesn�t bother them at all, it actually makes them love you more." She had to give him props for sticking that in there. "Now you have a choice. You�re going to be here a week, you can stay with me at my apartment, or you can find a cheesy yet expensive hotel to stay in."
"Hmm�I�d think I�d rather live on the street than have to stay in an apartment with you," she kidded. He stuck out his lower lip and looked away, feigning his despondency. "Oh of course honey I�ll stay with you. Why would I want to go anywhere else? There�s fear of Tyler finding me out."
"Of course you want to stay with me. You know I�m perfect." Fran openly laughed at the comment, then quickly hid it. The two were of the most notorious stars to come out of Tulsa along with Isaac, Zac, and Garth Brooks. The both of them together was almost bound to cause attention. Fran put on her sunglasses and pulled her hair back into a hat.
They got into a car and drove over to Taylor�s apartment first, just to drop off Fran�s stuff then proceeded to drive over to the old neighborhood. Fran was obviously nervous, it was readable in her face and the way she never stopped fidgeting. Taylor got fed up with it. "Frenchie! Stop it!"
"I�m sorry, I�m just really nervous. What am I supposed to say?" Taylor pulled into the driveway of his old home and stopped the car.
"Well I guess we�re going to just have to find out. We�re here, get out of the car." Fran got out and looked over the house. It hadn�t changed at all, and yet it felt like a completely different place. Everybody was six years older than they had been when she left, and she didn�t know how to handle it. Taylor grabbed her hand and walked to the door. He had explained on the plane that he told them he was bringing a guest home, but he didn�t say who. Well they were in for a surprise.
Taylor opened the door, and looked around. "Hello? We�re home!" Diana appeared at the doorway, and came close to dropping the glass she had in her hand. Fran was shocked by her surprise. Her and Diana hadn�t gotten along much at all, especially after she told them she was leaving. She blamed Fran that she was just trying to avoid her problems instead of staying in Tulsa and actually working them out.
"Oh my God, Fran?" Fran bit her lip and nodded. "Are you just going to stand there or are you going to give me a hug?" Fran glanced around before stepping into the woman�s open arms. Diana gave a look of surprise to Taylor, who only smiled. "Whatever made you come back?" Diana asked, once they separated.
"Well Taylor and I met up a few days ago after my game. Eventually he convinced me that I needed to come back. I don�t know much about what to say because I don�t know how my leaving affected you."
"That�s in the past, Fran," Diana said, waving it off. "All that matters is that you�re home now, at least for a few days. When will you be leaving again?" Fran sighed. Already she was talking about leaving.
"In a week. There�s not much I have to say and not much I have to do, but Taylor insisted on me staying for a while." Fran looked back at Taylor and smiled. Diana noticed this and was overjoyed.
"I�m just so happy that you two are talking again. Now are you back together or will I have to wait longer?" Diana asked, putting her hands on her hips. Fran laughed and grabbed Taylor�s hand.
"We�re back together."
"That�s wonderful! I always knew you two would be together for a long time." Diana smiled. "Congratulations on your game! We watched it here, all of us. I�m so proud of you! It�s not every day that someone in know wins the Stanley Cup."
"Thank you." Fran smiled and looked around the house. It hadn�t changed much, from the last time she�d been in it. That was too many years ago. Fran took it among herself to leave the front room and wander about the house. First she headed up the stairs.
Taylor followed Fran around, as she paused at each room and let her eyes gaze over it. Taylor hadn�t noticed how much her eyes had changed. Once being so hopeful now showed pain. Being back in Tulsa wasn�t something she was completely prepared for, after abandoning it. No one really had forgiven her for leaving, and it hurt her every day. She abandoned everything, because of him. Strange how a single person could affect someone�s life. And as much as he affected hers, she was amazingly calm about being with him.
Fran stopped completely at the end of the hall, having running into a room occupied by Zac. Zac looked up and jumped back, completely startled. "Fran?" he asked, getting up. She let a look of shock come over as he walked over and she had to look up. "Damn, you�re short!"
"I love you too, Zac." They embraced and Zac kissed her on the cheek. Fran missed that more than she thought. The moment they parted, Fran just pulled him back again. There was too much strength in that little girl. "Thank you so much."
"What did I do?" Zac asked, pulling away, trying to get out of her strength. He quickly remembered his room, and all the things in it. He tried to keep her gaze away from the interior. She didn�t seem to notice being turned away from the room. However she did notice the small look of panic of Zac�s face. She chose to ignore it.
"You were there for me, even when you didn�t know it. I haven�t seen you in years but you helped me out so much more than you could of being there. Just your words." Fran glanced in his room, wondering why he was trying to hide it from her. "Oh my God!" She walked into the room. There was wall to wall posters, pictures and memorabilia of her. She�d never seen so much about her. "I had no idea they made this many posters of me."
"I had to collect every one. I figured I owed it to you." Fran looked around, and noted the case of signed pucks. "I had one of my friends get a signed puck from you after every few games." Fran tried to remember seeing anyone a few times. One of her diligent fans popped into mind.
"Alan?" Fran asked, turning to Zac. Zac looked at her strangely.
"How�d you know who it was?"
"I�ve seen him so many times that I got to know him. I had a conversation with him after every game in my career! No wonder he always had a lot of gratitude for me, he was doing it for you!" Zac just shrugged. Fran continued to look through the pictures. "Woah, you have one of me and Austin. I remember, Alan took this one. Hell, he took half of these."
"Yeah, he kept sending me pictures so I figured I might as well frame them. Did you say Austin?" Fran nodded. "Why are you with Austin? I thought you hated him."
"I did, but then I forgave him and he�s my best friend now. I�m actually sharing an apartment with him back in Detroit. I�m going to have a lot to tell him when I get back." He looked at her strangely. "It�s really complicated, but that�s the way it worked out. We met in school, he was my right wing, we got along together. I kinda had to be with him all the time because we were the team. You�d understand if you went through it."
"When are you leaving?" Zac asked. Taylor leaned against the doorframe, bored. Fran didn�t notice.
"In a week. Geez Zac, I told you to remember me, not to build a shrine in my name." Zac just shrugged. "Well at least you have a reason. It would scare me if someone I didn�t know did all this. And I bet you there is someone out there who does. But I wouldn�t think about that now."
"You know, Tyler stops by every once in a while to admire my �shrine.� " Fran stiffened. "Okay, since I�m always left out on these things, mind sharing with me why you did that?" Fran shook her head and waved it off. "Fine then, don�t tell me."
"I don�t want to talk about it. I�ll just say, we just didn�t part in the best way possible. Something happened, I got pissed at him, and I haven�t talked to him since. He was an asshole to me anyway." Zac gave her a strange look. "I�m really not in the mood to explain it to you. Maybe later. I have a whole week to talk. Now I have things to do."
"Alright."
Fran turned around and Taylor was about to fall asleep. It upset her. "You know, Taylor, for once in your damn life why don�t you try not falling asleep when I�m in the middle of talking to someone?" Fran walked out of the room, brushing past Taylor in the doorway. Taylor sighed.
"Dammit, I pissed her off again," he told Zac. Zac had to laugh at him. They�d been back in Tulsa a whole hour when she was already pissed off by him. Taylor went off in the direction that Fran had headed. He wasn�t sure where she was going, but he knew he needed to catch up with her before she got into a car. Taylor saw her walk out the door and quickly ran outside. "Frenchie!" She kept walking. "French, come on!" She kept walking.
"Frances Marie Carlston get you ass back over here," Taylor yelled. Fran stopped and turned around. I knew that would work, he thought. She walked back over to him, flaming mad. She poked him in the chest, none too gently either. He took a step back to avoid any fist that might be flying in his direction soon.
"You never call me by my real name! Don�t ever do it again! You�ll only cancel me out with all the rest of them. If I hear you call me Frances, or Fran, or anything like the rest of them then I will kill you." Taylor grabbed onto her hand. "That is not my name with you! You know that and you do it anyway."
"Frenchie, honey, calm down. I didn�t mean to upset you, seriously. I was just getting your attention. I�ll never do it again. I didn�t know you felt that way." He wrapped his arms around her. "I�m sorry." She looked up to him and smiled faintly. He kissed the tip of her nose.
"Alright. It�s just to hear you call me by my real name, in which you�ve never, ever, called me that, it doesn�t make me feel as special. I like Frenchie, I like it a lot. And it makes me feel like the only person on the world with you because I know you made it up and only you can call me that."
"I love you Frenchie."
"I love you too Tayles." His eyes widened.
"I thought I told you never to call me that again! I outgrew that name when I was ten years old, okay?" Fran smiled and kissed him. "Yeah, I get screamed at and have to defend myself, but you get a slightly raised tone of voice and a kiss. What is wrong with this picture?"
"It means I�m in control and you suck."
"Well that�s no fun for me."
"Come on," she said. He rolled his eyes, but she barely noticed. "You are such a loser."
"I am not," Taylor said, trying to defend himself. She smiled and walked off, completely passing the car and heading down the street. It was funny how often she would walk or skate down the street instead of taking a car. He had to run to catch up with her. "Why do you walk so fast?"
"Because I can."
"Where are we going?" Fran didn�t answer. And when she remained silent after him repeating he question, his suspicions about where they were going were suddenly heightened. "You know you�ll just end up crying," Taylor said, and grabbed her hand. She looked away.
"I know, but I need to go anyway. It�s been ages since I�ve been and I need to see him again." Taylor brushed her hair out of her face. Fran suddenly had to stop and sit down. Taylor sat down next to her and put an arm around her as she put her face in her hands.
She didn�t cry, even though she felt as she should have. With as much counseling as she had with Jeanne, she was still rather embarrassed to cry. Fran could only figure that a year of psychiatric help doesn�t help as much as it should. She was able to open up to more people, be a bit more outgoing, but she was never able to cry when she wanted to.
When she calmed down and was ready to walk again, they continued. It didn�t take very long to get to the cemetery, and finding Kyle�s grave was easy. Taylor let Fran go by herself to his tombstone.
Fran walked slowly over to the grave, looking back at Taylor. He was keeping his distance, yet close enough to be there if she broke down crying. It was a quiet day with a gentle breeze, good as any day to see an old friend. Woah, old friend, Fran thought, Okay, I feel like an old grouch now. She cleared her throat and let her eyes gaze over the stone.
"Hi Kyle," she whispered. She knelt by his tombstone and lightly traced her fingertips over the smooth stone. A wail rose in her throat, but she put her hands over her mouth to keep it inside. An image of Kyle, her best friend, appeared in her mind. She closed her eyes and saw him, with her. I love you Kyle, I love you so much, she told him in her mind.
"I miss you," she whispered, her eyes opening. "You left me. As much as they say you�re still with me, you�re not. Oh God, I love you so much. I�m waiting for you to jump out from behind that tombstone and yell �gotcha�, but you aren�t, are you? Why not? Why are you leaving me here all alone?" She saw Taylor out of the corner of her eye. She lowered her voice so he wouldn�t hear. "We�re back together. I know you don�t approve of it, but I doubt it�ll last." She let out a shaky breath.
"I�m in the hockey league now. Highest paid athlete in the United States for something I wanted to do with you. You, me and Tyler were going to play on the Red Wings together! Now it�s just me and Austin. Austin! I�m playing with the guy who sent me out of the league for seven months. We�re cool now, though. We actually dated for a while, before the both of us got drafted. Right now we�re sharing an apartment in Detroit. Goes to show you that my money doesn�t affect me all that much. I�m living in a cramped, two-bedroom apartment in not exactly the best part of town."
"Speaking of Tyler, you know what happened. I know you know because you were helping me get through it. I still haven�t talked to him and I sincerely don�t plan on it. But you don�t need to hear all about my life. You know, you�re watching over me. You�re there and you�re helping me as much as you can. It�s not working as much as you would like, though." She thought about her life. "Say hello to my father for me, Kyle. I love you and I miss you. I want you back�" Her tears spilled over and the wail left her throat. She cried harder for him than she ever had for anything else. She wailed, she cried, she screamed.
Openly.
She dropped back with her butt resting on her heels, her hand over her mouth. Taylor came over and kneeled next to her. She closed her eyes and whimpered, her mind on Kyle. She�d hadn�t been to his grave since the funeral, and that was horrible. Her best friend, and she never paid her respects. Taylor took her free hand in his, showing a small sign of comfort.
Fran looked over to Taylor. Just from the look on his face, Fran knew that it killed him inside to see her like this. She held onto him tightly. "I�m sorry, I know you hate me this way."
"It�s alright," he said to her. She looked over to him, and saw a figure behind him. She stiffened. "Frenchie?" he noticed she was looking away. He turned around.
"Tyler?" Fran looked over and almost gasped.
She stood up and walked over to Tyler. It wasn�t exactly the Tyler she remembered. This one stood proud and tall, not slouched and a bit fearful of whenever Fran was around. Over the few years since she�d seen him, he�d grown another three inches, now over a foot taller than her. His face had become gentle over the years, as was his gaze on her.
"Hello Fran," he lightly said. "Different seeing you here." The first thing that flashed through her mind was what he did to her. She looked around. A small child and her mother were paying respects to someone not far away. She couldn�t make a scene here, it would disturb them.
"If we�re going to talk, let�s go somewhere else." Tyler looked around, barely noticing the two others that Fran hadn�t wanted to disturb. "Tyler, goodbye." Fran walked past him, only to have him grab her arm. She stopped and looked at his hand on her arm. "I thought I made it clear to you that I never wanted you to touch me again."
"That was years ago, Fran, let it go." Angry and frightful tears filled her eyes. If he could even think that we he deserved to remain in the hospital.
"You were my best friend. How you could think of saying that to me now is beyond my thoughts. You raped me. Now I don�t even want to know you." She forced her arm from his grip and began to walk away.
"You could of stopped me," Tyler said. She ran back to him.
"I tried!" she screamed. "Don�t you think I tried! With all the strength I have in me right now, I could kill you. But I know this town can�t handle another casualty."
"Well then with all that strength you could of pushed me away."
"Why did I even have to?" she said. "You should of heard me yelling for you to stop. I don�t want to look at you, Tyler. You don�t know what happened to my life because of you, and you don�t care. It�s not like it�s something that I can get over. You took away my freedom, you took away myself for whatever you wanted from me. I�ve known you since we were toddlers, Tyler. I�ve known you since before you could even skate, and you took advantage of me."
"You know you were as easy to get as I thought you were." Fran looked away, not understanding why she still stood there, taking his shit. "But then again you�ve always been pretty easy, haven�t you?" Her eyes glazed over with tears, the tears that he had caused her. Never in her life would she think that he would cause her to cry. He�d always been so kind, so gentle. Now he was a completely different person.
She looked over at Taylor. He saw the tears in her eyes that he had caused her to bear. "Come on Taylor, let�s leave." He walked over, only to have Tyler stop him.
"You know she�s faking the whole thing," Tyler whispered to him. Taylor looked at his old best friend, hatefully. Never in his life had he truly hated someone, and now he knew what that feeling was like. "She just wants the attention." Taylor punched him, sending him to the ground. Fran�s eyes grew wide.
"Oh my God, Taylor! Where the hell did you learn to do that?"
"You." She shook her head, not approving of it. "Let�s leave before he wakes up." Taylor took her hand and led her away. There wasn�t much conversation. Fran�s hands were shaking from just seeing the man, and her eyes were filled with tears from talking with him. "Frenchie?"
"Hmm?"
"When was the last time we went on a date?"
"To tell you the truth, Taylor, I don�t think we�ve ever been on a date." He thought about it. "Don�t think I�m going to let you take me out tonight, or tomorrow, or ever, cause I really don�t like dates. If I go out, especially being with you, we�re bound to get recognized."
"And what makes you think that?"
"Well, I�m Fran Carlston, most popular person to ever come out of the National Hockey League and from Tulsa, and your Taylor Hanson, the most popular hot guy to ever come out of Tulsa. I�m on television more than any McDonald�s commercial. We�re both walking around in Tulsa, and in broad daylight. I wonder if someone is going to recognize us!" Taylor rolled his eyes.
"And why do you care if someone will recognize us?" Fran shrugged.
"It�s not like I�m worried about anyone seeing me with you, cause that doesn�t bother me. Its just that I might get a mob of people around me or something, and I don�t want to be bothered when I�m trying to have a good time with you. It was the same way after you made it big, but then again I really didn�t see you."
"But it�s really all the more that we should go out. We�ve never been to a nice restaurant together and sat down for a peaceful evening, why don�t we do that tonight?" Fran just shrugged. He put his arms around her waist and pulling her close to him. "Just you and me."
"Do we really have to go out?"
"Why not?" She hugged him. "I have no idea how to cook so don�t even think about staying at my place and eating." She laughed. "Come on, Frenchie, just you and me, out in the moonlight� This is about as romantic as I�ll get for the next ten years so please accept it."
"Fine," she said with a laugh.
"And now we�re actually old enough to order the wine off the list." Fran smiled. Giving the two of them wine and putting them together in a room wasn�t the best idea. But the two overlooked that. They walked off and left Tyler behind, hoping never to see him again.
The night was beautiful. But then again Fran had always loved the night. She�d always loved sitting with Taylor and watching the stars. It didn�t matter or not that they didn�t move, there was just so many of them and she loved each one. Maybe it wasn�t the night, or the night sky; maybe it was just being there, alone with Taylor. Maybe it was the fact that they could stay out there for hours and be together, closer than they could ever be without saying a word.
After a beautiful dinner at a beautiful restaurant, Fran and Taylor were sitting, finishing up their wine. It was obvious that they had too much to drink, but they didn�t notice it themselves. The check came and Taylor paid with his handy dandy credit card. They finished their wine and left, no conversation between them.
The two walked out of the restaurant, Taylor smiling. Fran, however, had the taste of her mind get to her. Her reached over and grabbed her hand, but she only forced it away. "Don�t try it, Taylor, I�m mad at you." He gave her a confused look. "Don�t hide it, you hurt me and I�ll never forgive you."
"What?"
"You hurt me. Years ago. I�ll never get over it and you just go back to the way everything�s been. I�ll never forgive you, you realize that. I�ll never forgive you for changing my entire life in the single kiss with that other chick." Taylor looked over to her, and grabbed onto her.
"Why are you telling me this now? From the way you were acting a few hours ago I would most definitely think that you�re fine with me. You�ve been fine with me for the past couple of days! Hell, you slept with me."
"That doesn�t make anything fine. You think you can solve all my years of problems with sex?" Fran yelled. "You got the key word up there, Taylor. Acting! I�ll never be fine with you. Every time I look at you I think of what you did to me and how much you hurt me. And to think you told your mother that we were broken up! Goddammit Taylor, how many other girls did you have while you were on the road? Who were you fooling when you had her at your house? Did you not think that I would come over? I come over all the time!"
"There were no other girls, Fran. Just her. I explained to you before that I don�t know what I did. I got lonely. It�s lonely on the road without you there."
"Why didn�t you take me along?" she yelled. "If you were so upset about everything, and me not being there, why didn�t you bother taking me along?"
"You know I couldn�t do that. Taking a person on the road isn�t something I can just announce and do. There are accommodations to think of. You and school, you and your hockey! If I took you along you�d never be able to go out on your skates, you�d never be able to go out on to a rink and play again. You wouldn�t be where you are today if you went with me."
"Still, you could of called sometime. Three in the morning, four in the afternoon, whenever! I don�t care when you called, it just that I needed to hear your voice! It was hell explaining to my psychiatrist all about you not calling and what it did to me. It was even more hell explaining to her all about you! What am I supposed to say to her? He�s the boyfriend that�s never around and adds to my hellish life?"
"Frenchie, you know I never meant anything like that!" Taylor said, grabbing onto her hands. Here they were, pretty much drunk, in front of a restaurant fighting. "You know I never meant to hurt you in any way."
"Yet you did." Fran turned and walked away. She noticed the people waiting to get in the restaurant. She was expecting an applause. Luckily they weren�t paying attention�or at least they acted like it. She ran away from Taylor, not knowing where she was going. Normally at a time like this she�d go home, but her home was sold to someone else, and she was staying with Taylor. She figured he�d look for her back at Diana�s, so she went somewhere else.
Coach Curtis opened the door and looked at Fran, standing in front of him. She recognized him immediately. A tear fell from her eye. "Taylor and I got into a fight, I don�t know where to go because I�m staying with him, and I can�t handle it. I was just hoping you�d take me for a while." She took in a breath as he stood there, not saying anything. She couldn�t identify his emotions. "I know we didn�t part well, I know we had a fight about what happened with Tyler, but you were always a father to me and I�m just hoping you�d take a lonely daughter back."
"Come on in, Fran." She walked into the house and looked around. It�d only been four years since she�d been there, but for some reason she couldn�t remember how it had been. "I was waiting for you to come back." She turned around to look at him. The man hadn�t changed much; he had aged a bit and was going grey, but she figured that would be happening anyway.
"Why?"
"Because, you�re my little girl, I can�t expect you to stay away forever. I know you wouldn�t be back soon, though. With how you left last time and all�"
"Let�s not bring it up."
"Why not? You�re going to have to tell someone someday. As it is, I don�t know the whole story. I just know what Tyler told me, and to tell you the truth, from the way he acts, I don�t believe him. Why don�t you tell me what happened?" Fran sat down at the counter, looking over the kitchen. Coach Curtis got her a glass of water. She twirled the glass around with her fingers. After a bit of thinking and hesitating, she looked up.
"Tyler raped me, Coach."
Fran didn�t explain, she didn�t even try. She saw Coach Curtis stiffen, from both her comments. Calling him Coach again, and saying that his son had raped her. The silence was broken as the front door opened. Tyler walked in, wanting to speak to his father.
"Dad, you�ll never guess who I ran into today�" Tyler paused, and looked at Fran who was sitting at the counter. "What are you doing here?" he asked and poked her, trying to act like old friends in front of his father.
"I thought I made it clear, twice, that you were to never touch me again," Fran said, sternly. She took a sip from her water and turned away from him. Tyler didn�t know that Coach Curtis knew the truth.
"Come on, Fran�"
"Leave me alone." Coach Curtis wanted to stay out of it; he didn�t want to talk to his son. He didn�t even want to know that boy anymore. Tyler looked up, to try and meet a gaze with his father. It wasn�t happening.
"Dad�"
"Go home, Tyler," Coach Curtis said. "Leave her alone. She never did anything to you. I don�t know you anymore." Tyler�s eyes grew. She must have told him. "Leave!"
"The only thing she ever did to me was fall in love with Taylor," Tyler said, and left. Fran looked after him, confused. It wasn�t the statement that confused her, she knew exactly what that meant. It was that he never let anything out in the eighteen years she knew him.
I love you, Fran. I love you more than you think.
You are beautiful, Fran
. Fran looked up at Coach Curtis. He was pissed beyond pissed. "Let it go," she said. "Just forget I ever stopped by." She stood up and walked to the door, her long coat hitting her in the back of her knees.
"Fran�" She turned around. "Why don�t you stay here tonight? I have a room open." She smiled. "Tyler lives in an apartment downtown. He doesn�t stop by unless he has something important to say. I won�t let him bother you." Coach Curtis led her to her room. It was still the bright blue they�d painted it years before. It stuck out like a sore thumb.
"You kept my room?" Fran asked. "You complained over the color for years!" Coach Curtis shrugged. "I�ll probably call Taylor later on, at least to tell him I�m still in town. He�s probably worried sick."
"Since when do you care about Taylor?" Coach Curtis asked. Fran sat down on her bed. "The last time I saw you, you were avoiding him at all costs." She looked up at Coach Curtis, like she�d done so many times in the past. Back then it was all innocent, now she had a weight on her shoulders that would be there forever.
"He came back into my life a few days ago. From the way he wouldn�t let me walk away I could tell he was really sorry. We�re just starting over again." Fran decided not to put in the little fact that they slept together. Coach Curtis only nodded, and left. She couldn�t identify his emotions, and she didn�t try.
She got ready to go to sleep, and fell into a deep slumber in her old bed.