Don't Walk Away
Chapter
Twenty-Eight
(Much
later in the evening, after nap, dinner & flight reservations.)
Chloe threw her smaller suitcase on the bed and began filling it up. She wanted
everything to be ready and prepared for when her flight left the next afternoon.
She was folding a pair of jeans and placing them inside, when she heard the soft
knocking at her door.
"Come in!"
The door opened and Belle entered, visibly surprised by the sight of Chloe
packing her things.
"Chloe... Are you going somewhere? What's going on?"
Chloe laid the pair of jeans aside and sat on the edge of the bed. "That's
why I called you over here. Something is going on."
Belle cringed slightly. "Is this something I should be sitting down
for?"
"Perhaps."
Belle nodded and sat in the desk chair across from her. "Well, what is
it?"
Chloe sighed softly and smiled at her. "I'm going to tell you something
really important. And, you have to SWEAR not to tell anyone. And, I mean ANYONE.
Not even Shawn. I'm sure everyone will find out eventually, but I'm not ready
for that yet."
"Okay... I swear, I cross my heart and I promise not to tell anyone."
"Well, you know how I've been sick lately... I found out today that it's
not just the flu."
Belle's eyes widened in fear and she laid her hand on her chest. "It's not
something worse, is it?"
Chloe shook her head and smiled reassuringly. "No, it's not. I'm... I'm
pregnant."
Belle gripped the side of her chair with one hand to prevent herself from
falling over in shock. She blinked her eyes rapidly and shook her head,
completely bowled over by Chloe's news. "You're pregnant? But, how? You
said that you guys used protection that night."
"I know, and we did. But, nothing is foolproof I guess. I don't know how it
happened, but it can't be changed now."
"So... You're going to California? So you can tell him, right?"
Chloe nodded a confirmation and Belle continued. "How do you think he'll
take it?"
Chloe shrugged slightly. "I don't really know. I hope he sees it the way I
do. If this happened, then it means something in the grand scheme of things. I
feel like it's fate trying to tell me something, that I belong with Brady
forever, and we're meant to raise a child together. And, if he doesn't feel the
same way, for whatever reason... It doesn't matter. I'm going to be a mother to
my baby, no matter how he feels about it."
"Oh wow, Chloe... I don't know what to say. Is this happy news? Do we think
this is a good thing?"
"I... I... Yes, it is a good thing. It's not exactly what I had in mind for
my life, but it is a very good thing. I love Brady, and I know we're young and
totally unprepared for this, but I want this baby. And, I can still be a singer
someday, and have a career, and everything else I've ever dreamed of. It just
delays everything a little bit."
Belle's expression turned into a smile and she joined her friend on the bed,
hugging her tightly. "Then I'm happy too, Chloe. If this makes you happy,
then I am happy for you. Congratulations."
Chloe hugged her back and sighed softly. "Thank you, Belle. I need all the
support I can right now. And, I know some people are going to think this is a
bad idea... But, having the child of the man I love could never be a bad
thing."
"It's just so weird. One day, the two of you are 'just friends', and then
everything changed so quickly. You're in love, and now you're having a
baby." Belle let go of her and then grinned slightly. "And, I'm gonna
be an AUNT again. I can't wait. And, I promise you I'm going to be with you
every step of the way, through all of this. You're my best friend, and I will
never stop supporting you."
"Thank you, I'm so glad that you said that. But, please don't tell anyone
else. I want Brady to be the next one to know. Your mother knows, but only
because she was at the hospital with my family today. Don't tell anyone until I
can tell them myself."
Belle nodded confidently and crossed her heart. "I swear. Your secret is
safe with me. So... When does your flight leave?"
"Noon, tomorrow. Which is another reason I asked you over here..."
"You need a ride to the airport?"
Chloe shook her head slightly and continued. "No, I don't. But, I need a
ride somewhere else before I leave. Tomorrow morning. Nancy and Craig both have
things to do before they are coming home to take me to the airport. So, I don't
have a car or any way to get there. And, I may need you just to be there as my
best friend."
Belle nodded but wrinkled her eyebrows in confusion. "Where do you need to
go?"
"Uhm... I'll tell you in the morning. Is eight o'clock too early?"
"No, I'll be here at eight on the nose." Belle stood and Chloe stood
along with her. Belle pointed at Chloe's clock and continued. "Which means
I better let you finish your packing and get some rest. You can't be sleepy when
you go see my brother tomorrow."
Chloe smiled at her and nodded. "Thank you, Belle. For everything. I'll see
you in the morning."
Belle smiled back and hugged her tightly before leaving. Chloe watched her walk
away and then returned to her packing. She didn't know if what she was planning
on doing tomorrow morning was a good idea, but somehow, deep down, it made sense
to her.
***
(The Next Morning)
Chloe stood outside the large gray metal door, staring intently at a tiny dent
in its finish. She had been staring at the same dent for the past five minutes,
trying to find the strength to move her feet. Belle stood next to her clutching
her hand tightly for support, and Chloe wondered how much longer they could
stand here before she finally got her courage up or got kicked out.
She turned to Belle with a look of worry. "Can... Can I really do this? I
don't know if I can."
Belle nodded confidently. "You can. After everything you've been through
already, you can handle this. And, if you can't. I'll be right outside the door
to take you home."
"Are you sure I can do this?"
"Chloe... Only you know the answer to that question. But, I think my mom
was right. I think that it might help you more than you think."
Chloe nodded and turned to the guard standing near the door. The same guard who
probably thought they were two seriously disturbed women for standing in the
same spot for the last five minutes, hesitating before entering. "I'm ready
to go in now."
The guard nodded and began to open the door. Chloe looked at Belle one last
time, and Belle was smiling at her reassuringly. She squeezed her hand tightly
before letting go of it, hoping to gain a little extra courage. Chloe took a
deep breath in and walked into the small gray room alone.
The guard shut the door behind her and muttered something about 'taking cubicle
number four'. Chloe looked around at the line of seats, divided from each other
by a thin metal barrier, each one facing a clear glass wall. She sighed
nervously and took her seat at cubicle number four as she was instructed.
Chloe stared at the clear wall in front of her, realizing that it wasn't glass,
but some other substance. Plexiglass? Fiberglass? She almost laughed at herself,
realizing that her overanalyzing of surfaces was just a defense mechanism to get
her through this.
She shifted her gaze when she heard a noise on the other side of the wall. The
door on the other side opened, and in walked Phillip Kiriakis escorted by two
guards. He was wearing a prison jumpsuit, and when asked later, Chloe would
remark that he looked like hell, only much worse. His skin was pale, his eyelids
drooped sadly, his usually shiny blonde hair was a mess, and he looked like he
had lost some weight after two months of jail food instead of gourmet meals at
Tuscany.
He sat down across from her and looked into her eyes sadly. Phillip grabbed the
phone off of the desk beside him, and Chloe did the same.
"Chloe... I'm so glad you..."
She stopped him in the middle of his sentence with a wave of her hand.
"Shut up, Phillip. I don't want to hear what you have to say. I don't want
to listen to your voice. I didn't come here for you. I came here for me. Now,
please don't say anything else, because I have some things I need to say to
you."
Phillip nodded slightly, obeying her instructions. Chloe took a deep breath in
and continued. "I didn't come here today to make YOU feel better. I'm not
here to relieve your guilt, or absolve all of your sins. I'm here for purely
selfish reasons, something you know a lot about. I'm here so I can absolve
myself for what I did. So, I can dissolve every association I ever had with
you."
He turned his head, looking away from her. Chloe felt her anger rise and she hit
the glass with her hand, jolting him suddenly. He turned back and looked at her
again, and she practically growled into the phone.
"Phillip, don't you dare look away from me. You look in my eyes and listen
to what I have to say until I have finished. Don't try and hide from the truth
anymore."
Phillip kept his eyes firmly planted in her direction and Chloe took a deep
breath in before beginning again.
"I... I should have known from the very beginning that you and I were
doomed to end up like this. You said you loved me, but it was all a lie. You
don't know what love is, Phillip. You never have. You never really loved me. You
just loved the idea of me. Some pretty girl that you could have, and control,
and mold into whatever you wanted her to be. That's not love. You never cared
about me, or what was best for me. You only cared about yourself. And, I should
have done something to end it a lot sooner than I did."
Chloe paused, preventing the tears in her eyes from falling. She had shed enough
tears over Phillip Kiriakis, and she swore she would not let another one fall.
"You kept screwing up, and you kept hurting me, but I always came back to
you. And, I did it because I didn't think I deserved any better. I thought that
I wasn't worthy of a real love, that this was the best I could ever do, so I
should hold on to it tightly. And, you must have known that. You saw my
insecurities and you played on them the entire time. Then I met Brady. And, he
taught me something important. He taught me that I didn't have to be perfect to
be loved. He showed me that I didn't have to keep running back to the handsome,
popular, school jock to find my self-worth. I learned that I didn't need to find
my self-esteem in your arms, or in the arms of anyone, that I could find it
inside myself. He was my friend, for a long time, and he never cared about my
flaws and he never tried to control me or change me. And, that is love. Caring
about someone more than you care about yourself is love. Wanting to make someone
happy, and not caring whether you get happiness in return... THAT is love. And,
that's why you know nothing about it."
Chloe paused for a moment, feeling that familiar lump in her throat, but still,
she would not let the tears all.
"And, it's pretty pathetic, Phillip. The way that you've behaved, the
things that you did. And, I'm not just talking about trying to kill your own
flesh and blood. You claimed to love me, but you never trusted me, and you never
actually listened to anything I had to say. You were jealous of Brady, even when
you had no reason to be. I was never unfaithful to you, and I never would have
been, not while we were going out or even when you were in Puerto Rico. But, I
did fall in love with him, that's true. Because he gave me everything that you
never could. The night you went to see him, was the night I was going to tell
him that I loved him. And, you tried to take him away from me. Whether it
because of your illness or because of you... I don't really care anymore."
Chloe sighed and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear. She cleared her throat
slightly, and then continued. "I blamed myself for what you did. I blamed
myself because I didn't figure out how dangerous you could be before it was too
late. I blamed myself because I was the catalyst for all of your bad behavior.
And, as dumb as it was to think so, I thought it was my fault because I fell in
love with Brady. But, I couldn't help falling in love with him, that's not
something that can be changed. I almost let all of my guilt destroy me, it was
eating me up inside ever since the day that you told me what you did. I could
have let it ruin me, and ruin the future that I want to have with Brady. But, I
didn't. Because, I understand things better now. I can't take responsibility for
your mistakes, which are plentiful. Only YOU are responsible for you, not me. If
it hadn't of been me that you were obsessed with, it would have been someone
else. It could have been Belle, Mimi, Cynthia, any other girl... it doesn't
matter. You are sick, and that has nothing to do with me."
Chloe paused and looked at Phillip. He was still trying to keep his gaze front
and center, but he had tears streaming down his face. She tried to find sympathy
in her heart, but there was none, not for him. Chloe had spent too long caring
about his well-being, and she wanted no more of it. That aspect would now be
left to the person who had no other choice but to love him, his mother.
"There's one thing that I most wanted to tell you today. I wanted to tell
you that you don't win. Not this round, not any round. You lose, Phillip. Even
if you had succeeded in killing Brady that night, you still would have lost. I
didn't love you anymore, and I didn't want to be with you. With or without Brady
around, you still lose. And Brady... he was down, but he was never out. He
fought, and he came back, and he's going to be just fine. You lose again. And
me? I almost let you win. My guilt could have gotten the best of me, but it
didn't. I feel no guilt anymore. In fact, I feel nothing at all for you anymore.
No love, no guilt, no anger, not even hate. You're nothing to me. You don't
exist."
Chloe's gaze became steelier and her voice rose just to make her point even more
clear. "The next time I see your face will be in the courtroom. And, I
don't know what's going to happen. You may be back on the streets eventually
because of your 'illness', or you may spend the rest of your life in jail. But,
either way, that trial better be the last time I ever have to look at you again.
I'm moving on with my life, and you will never have a part of that. Not anymore.
You lose, Phillip. And, I win. I'm happy, healthy, and I have everything I could
want. I have a man who loves me, and I love him. We're going to have a very
happy future together. So, you lose."
Chloe felt a smile of victory creep up, but she kept it hidden. Phillip wiped
his tears way with his spare hand and tried to speak.
"Chloe... I..."
She didn't let him finish whatever it was he had to say. Chloe hung up the phone
and stood up quickly, pushing her chair in. She didn't even bother to glance at
Phillip as she turned away. He wanted to apologize, to beg for her forgiveness,
but she couldn't hear it, knowing that she would have to hear enough of it when
his trial began next month.
She headed for the door and quickly made her exit. Belle was sitting outside
chewing on her nails nervously. No words were spoken, and Chloe felt like she
didn't exhale until they reached the car in the parking lot.
Chloe finally let out all of the air in her chest and looked at Belle as the
stood outside her car. Belle looked at her expectantly, waiting for some sort of
sign as to Chloe's state of mind. "Well, Chloe? Are you okay?"
Chloe paused thoughtfully and smiled at her friend. "Yeah, I'm great. You
could even go as far to say... victorious."
Belle grinned at her proudly. "Then I guess I'll have to treat you to a
victory breakfast before your flight leaves. Come on, let's go."
Chloe nodded in agreement and got into the passenger seat of the car. She
buckled her seatbelt and looked out the window. Marlena had been right. Staring
Phillip in the face and telling him that he had no effect on her anymore had
given her a sense of freedom. It was the final boost she needed to let go of all
the pain that had been haunting her.
***
(Wait a second... Did I hear you say Broe reunion? That's right! A new chapter
coming soon to a fanfic board to you! Stay tuned. This coming attraction has not
yet been rated. ;)
I'm sure I could have written this story without writing this chapter, but not
only did Chloe need to get some things off her chest, so did I. It's my own
lovely way of getting to rant against Phil the Pill.
Which reminds me... when Phil was telling Belle on the show that he was
"going to put a stop to this", I was like... "BLEH! Don't you hit
Brady with your car, Philly! It's too tragic! I know, because I wrote it!"
Just seemed a bit eerily coincidental. Either that or I have mental problems for
talking to my TV on a regular basis.
And I'm working as fast as I can to get chapter 29 done, I really really am.)