Only Fools And Horses

Go West Young Man

THE TROTTERS' LOUNGE. Rodney, in his usual state, is seated at the table looking into a bowl of soggy cornflakes. He is in a depressed mood. Grandad is watching the Open University on both TVs. Del, in his usual flashy gear, is seated opposite Rodney and is reading Glasses Guide (the motor trade's Bible). Television Just touching the cone and also just touching the plane. And the two points where the spheres touch the plane... Del Alright, here's where our future lies Rodney, second-hand motors! This time next year we'll be millionaires! Rodney I dreamed I was drowning last night! Del Here, the way I see it is this, the government, they're going to have to ban the import of foreign cars to save our car industry. But the unions won't stand for that - because that smacks of racialism - so they'll all go out on strike! That'll mean you won't be able to buy a new car for love nor money! Grandad No. Del No, no, that is it Rodney. Britain's future lies fairly and squarely in the second-hand car game. What did you say just now? You dreamt that you were drowning? Is that a gentle way of trying to tell us that last night you wet the bed? Rodney No, it's not! I'm just depressed that's all, and these cornflakes aren't making me feel any better! Del Honestly Rodney, you make my teeth itch. I've asked you before, and I've asked you again - phone her! Rodney She knows I won't phone her first! Del How does she know that you won't phone her first? Did you tell her that you wouldn't phone her first? Rodney No! Del No, well go and phone her and tell her. Rodney Oh that's stupid! Del No, it's not, it's no more stupid than the moody you're in. Why is it whenever you're getting your end away, the skies are blue, the lager's cool and England are gonna win the World Cup. And just because some little tart with fat thighs gives you the elbow, you're in a fit of destruction. Rodney She has not given me the elbow! Monica and I are having difficulties getting it all together on a one-to-one basis. So my mate, Mickey Pearce - now he's lived with a woman - he advised us to have a two-week trial separation. Del A two-week trail separation? Cor, come on, you've only known her for two weeks! Grandad What is it then Rodney, a fort- night on, a fortnight off like sentry duty? Rodney I am not going to phone her Grandad, that's all there is to it! Plenty more chicks around. Del Yeah, alright then - well come on. I reckon your best bet is to have a blind date with a Samaritan! Rodney I'll survive Del. And Monica has not got fat thighs! Del She's got fat thighs! Rodney She has not! Del Look, I was down the Nag's Head disco last night and either she's got fat thighs or she was bopping the night away in a pair of jodhpurs! Rodney Monica was out dancing? Del Yeah! Here, with your mate Mickey Pearce as it happens! Del exits. Rodney Del! SECOND-HAND CAR SITE. An area at the back of the site. Del and the owner, Boycie - out of the same mould as Del - are examining an old black convertible Zephyr Mark 2. It is dirty with rust spots, bald tyres, etc. Rodney is seated in the Zephyr's driving seat. In the background is an E-Type Jaguar. Boycie Oh yes - this came in with a Chesterfield and a gross of electric toothbrushes as a part-chop on a Vanden Plas. Still, clean it up a bit, couple of new tyres! Del Yeah, yeah, a new engine, new body, and you've got a nice little motor. Rodney There's 98,000 miles on the clock! Is that genuine? Boycie Eh? Del Shut up Rodney. Be honest Boycie, I mean seriously, it's a bit of a pig! Boycie Well what d'you want for 50 quid? Del Ah, well now you're talking! I'll take that. (indicating the E-Type) What do you want, cheque or shall I give it to you with the old readies? Boycie You would an' all wouldn't you? Del Oh certainly. No, no, it's handsome though, innit? Boycie Yeah. You know it's only E-Type Jaguars and Sebastian Coe that can make me feel proud to be British these days! Del Yeah, I know what you mean Boycie. Why haven't you got this up at the front? Boycie It's not for sale Del, my old mate. As a matter of fact I'm looking for a place to hide it for a week. I bought it as a birthday present. I'm dead scared the wife's gonna see it and suss it all out. Rodney Spoil the surprise? Boycie Spoil everything Rodney, it's a birthday present for my bit on the side! Rodney You what? Del His bit on the side, his bit... Never mind Boycie. It's so long since Rodney had a bit on the side he didn't know they'd moved it! Wait a minute! Hang about...Mon dieu, you want to hide this for a week, right? Boycie Right. Del We've got an empty garage round on the estate. I can pop it in there for you if you like. Boycie Be handy Del, save me a lot of aggro. Right well. I owe you one Del. Del No, forget it Boycie. I mean if you can't do a pal a favour without expecting something in return! I mean... (indicating Zephyr) How much did you say you wanted for that again? THE GARAGE BLOCK. The E-Type is parked in Del's garage. He is standing outside admiring the car. He is about to pull the door shut when he reacts to the sounds of the approaching Zephyr being driven by Rodney. The Zephyr skids round the corner into the garage block area. Rodney is hammering the brake pedal. Del leaps back into the garage as the Zephyr roars past him. There is a great screaming from the brake drums as the car shudders to a halt. Rodney collapses over the steering wheel. Del What's the matter? Brakes a bit spongy are they? Rodney Brakes! What bloody brakes? I nearly killed myself Del! It's a death trap! Del What do you expect for 25 quid? PARKING AREA (ESTATE). Rodney is polishing the Zephyr, which now looks like a clean heap. A hand-written sign on the windscreen reads 'For Sale" It is priced at two hundred pounds. Rodney picks up a cup of coffee which he has left on the ground and then sits in the driver's seat for a breather. The car suddenly starts bouncing up and down wildly. Rodney tries to hang on grimly to his spilling, hot coffee. A man is bouncing the car up and down to test the suspension. He is about 30 and a real Barry Mackenzie type, one of the Earl's Court Foster's set. Aussie Your shock absorber's gone! Rodney Well it has now! Aussie What's it like? Rodney What's what like? Aussie The car you dingo, what you think I'm talking about, yer flaming coffee? Rodney The car? Oh well, you know, it's''s... Aussie It's a bit over-priced! Rodney It's a bit over-priced, yeah, that's what I was going to say! Aussie Says 23,000 on the clock! Is that genuine? Rodney 23...Well the last time I looked there was over... Del, like a spider descending upon a fly, appears as if out of nowhere. Del 22,500, quite right Rodney. No I had the RAC do a 500-mile road test on it. Well you know better safe than sorry that's what I always say. It's beautiful though isn't it? Beautiful. What do you think? Son et lumiere wouldn't you say? Aussie Well, I don't know if I'd go quite that far! Del Oh yeah, I mean, look at this eh? Genuine leather upholstery that. Where would you find genuine leather upholstery like that these days, huh? Do you know what the East African gazelle became an endangered species for this model, sacrifice well made I'd say wouldn't you? No, it's an enthusiast's model this one and I can see that you are, in fact, a genuine enthusiast! Aussie Don't give me that crap mate! I can make up me own mind and I don't need any help from no Cockney villain! Del Cockney villain! Cockney Villain! Now there's no need to be like that sir, I mean after all the British and the Australians are cousins across the sea, ain't they. I mean if your great grandad hadn't have been a bloody villain you could have been one of us! Say no more. C'est la vie. San fairy ann. Allow me to point out some of the optional extras on this one, sir, for you. Look at that; the anti-dazzle mirror. In here you'll notice that we've got the old - look at that - the one - speed wiper, and... (he slams the door and the side window falls down), we've got automatic windows. Oh yeah a perfect example of the sporting tourer, and of course, it comes complete with a full two-weeks MOT still left to run. Aussie How many owners? Del How many owners? I'm glad you asked me that sir. Because it's only had the one owner from new...and that, of course, was a vicar! Rodney A vicar? Aussie A vicar! Del A vicar! Used to use it to drive backwards and forwards to church on a Sunday that was all. (opening the glove compartment) Oh look at that. Only left his Bible in the glove compartment. THE TROTTERS' LOUNGE. Grandad is watching the two TVs. Del is standing at the table counting a thick wad of money and whistling. He is full of the joys of life having executed this profitable con. Del (speaking in cod Aussie) As I was walking through Earl's Court. Into a pub I was lured. Where a nosy Pom said, 'Where you from?' as I downed the amber fluid. I said 'Get it straight, I'm an Aussie mate. And I'm fixing to get plastered. But the beer is crook. And the birds all look. Like you, you Pommy...' (handing Grandad two fivers) Grandad. Grandad Cheers Del Boy. Del Alright. Go out and buy your- self a crate of Odour Etares. Grandad Yeah. I've heard they're good! Del Oh they are - they are. Bloody murder to swallow though! Here, where's Peckham's conscience? Grandad Oh he's in his room pining about that little fat bird! Women! You wouldn't remember when I married yer Grandmother! Del No! Grandad The first night we was in bed and - well you know Del! Del What? Grandad Well, doing what you do when the lights are out! Del Holding a séance, was you? Grandad No! You know what I mean! Any- how, right in the middle of it, d'you know what she said to me? Del No, what? Grandad She said 'What d'you fancy for dinner tomorrow?'! Del What d'you fancy for dinner tomorrow! Grandad Bad innit? Del Bet that didn't happen to Omar Sharif! Anyway what did you say? Grandad Steak and Kidney pudding I think! Del Isn't love wonderful! Rodney enters. Del (cont'd) Aye up. Look out the room is full. Where you going? Fancy dress party? Rodney No I'm gonna do what Monica was doing last night. Del Oh going dancing with Mickey Pearce are you? Rodney No! I'm going out - I'm gonna paint the town red - rip it up a bit! Del Oh yeah, where you going, Streatham? Rodney No, I'm not going to Steatham Del! I'm gonna hit a few clubs up West. Del What? You up West? Rodney Yeah. Del You'd need a bloody compass to find it, you would. Rodney I am often up West Del, I'm one of the faces! Del One of the faces! Do me a favour Rodney. Two halves of lager at the British Legion Club is like a walk on the wild side for you! Rodney Oi! Just leave me to live my own life would you! And what do you mean 'fancy dress'? Del Well just - wonder why you were hitting the West End looking like a praying mantis. Rodney Just lay off me Del. Is that the money from the Cortina? That death-trap you sold to Skippy? Del Yes, look, there was nothing wrong with that car! Rodney Nothing wrong! The oil light stayed on, the steering didn't always go the way you wanted it to and the brakes didn't work! Del A few minor faults. Anyway, the oil light didn't stay on, I fixed it. Rodney You mean you actually went to the trouble of changing the oil? Del No, I took the bulb out. Rodney You are great you are Del. I mean, you've done some pretty doubtful things in your time but I never thought you'd stoop to selling instant motorway madness! Del Oh shut up you tart! Rodney That money is immoral - that is your handful of silver Del. That is nothing more than blood money! Del Oh, oh is it? Oh yeah. (putting the money in his pocket) Alright then. Rodney Oi, half of that's mine! Del Ah ha! Now you see what I mean don't you eh, Grandad? That is the mentality of your spoon- fed student type. They walk around all day with Steve Bilko written on their T-shirts spouting about humanity, when it comes down to a fight over a torn fiver they make Genghis Khan look like a pacifist! Rodney Look I was merely stating a fact that half of that is mine. It don't mean to say I want it! Del Oh I see - don't want this money then Rodney, eh? Rodney No. Del Oh, what bind, I'll have to spend it all myself then won't I, eh? Oh well, still going out are you Rodney? Rodney Er...Yeah...Do you er, fancy tagging along Del, I'll show you some of my clubs. Del No, no, no really. Look if you're hard up for a bit of company I'll come, alright. Rodney Hey, hard up for company, you must be joking. I've got hundreds of friends! Del Oh - oh that's alright then - good. Rodney Yeah. There's the cats from the evening class for a start. Grandad Cats? Where you going Rodney? Dancing or ratting? Del Ratting I like that. Rodney It means ravers Grandad, swingers! And these guys really live it up Del, and when I say live I mean live! Yeah, there's Dave and Bob...Mike and, and Tony, George... Del Jim. Rodney Jim...yeah. Del Why don't you go and give 'em a bell? Rodney Who? Del You know, the Beautiful People from the evening institute! Rodney Er, they're not on the phone! Del What, you mean all these swingers ain't got a phone between 'em? Are they on the electric yet? Rodney Alright, alright! Well, you coming with me, then? Del No, no, I'll pop down the Nag's Head for a light ale later on. Rodney Well your loss Del. I'll tell you all about it in the morning then, assuming I'm back in the morning. Del Yeah alright. Rodney Well are you coming or not then? Del No! Rodney Ok then...Well here I go! Del Yeah, see yer then. Rodney I'll give the birds your regards shall I? Del Yeah, you do that, it's triffic, great, yeah. Rodney Right, well we have take off! He exits then re-enters. Rodney (cont'd) Well make up your mind Del, you coming or not? Del You bloody kids! They can't even enjoy themselves today can they, eh! Alright, come on soppy, let's go and rip it up! Rodney Well if you want to tag along that's fine by me Del! Er, if you can pay for your own way. Del Pay for...don't worry, I've got the money. I've got the keys to the van and all - Grandad, go easy on the iron jelloids tonight. Rodney We're not going up West in a three-wheeled van are we? Del I certainly ain't walking it Rodders! Rodney Yeah but I mean it's all about images init Del. I mean you're very suave and debonair. Del Yeah well I s'pose I am a bit ostentatious really. Yeah I am, aren't I? Rodney Still, if I drive, you hide down behind the dashboard and no one will see us arrive. Del What do you mean no one will see us arrive? I want people to see me arrive don't I, eh? Rodney In a three-wheeled van? Still, got no choice have we? Del Yes we have! Yes we have, we can take Boycie's E-Type Jag! Rodney (Mock horror) The Jag! Are you sure Del, well upon your shoulders be it son, let's go. Rodney exits. Del Rodney! NIGHTCLUB. It is very dark and intimate. The place is virtually empty save for two girls who are seated with their backs turned some distance away from the bar. Del and Rodney are seated at a table. Del Is it always as dark as this in here or are they holding a dummy run for a coal miners' convention? Rodney I dunno! Del What do you mean you dunno? I thought you said this was one of your regular clubs. Rodney Well I might have exaggerated a bit when I said regular. Del How many times have you been here then? Rodney Never! Del Never? What you bring us in here for then? Rodney It looked alright from the out- side! Del It looked alright from the out- side! That's what the Christians said about the coliseum, you berk! Rodney Not much action for a nightclub is there! Del No, probably something to do with the fact that it's only half past seven! It's the last time I come out with you Rodney! Rodney Is that a promise you moaning git? Del Oi, watch it you. Ah Garçon la petite pois! The waiter approaches. He is casually dressed and effeminate. Waiter Parlez vous Fraçais? Del Jawohl! Waiter Yes! What can I get for you? Del Um, I'd like a Caribbean Stallion. Waiter Wouldn't we all dear! What is it? Del It's an exotic cocktail ain't it, specially created for the discerning palates of the international jet-set! Roger Moore drank one in Live and Let Die. Waiter I wouldn't put anything past her. Del Eh? Yeah well you'd better write this down hadn't you? What you want is a shot of Tequila and a shot of coconut rum and one of Crème de Menthe. Then you want a smidgin, just a smidgin, of Campari, with the merest suggestion of Angostura bitters. Right, you top that up with fresh grapefruit juice, and you shake it - do not stir - right. Pour that slowly over broken ice. Garnish with a slice of orange, slice of lime, your occasional seasonal fruits. Top that off with a decorative plastic umbrella, two translucent straws and - voila! Waiter Right! And for you? Rodney Half a lager please. Waiter Half a lager...Reg Varney drank one of them in Holiday on the Buses! Del Is he a bit funny? Rodney I dunno. Del He's definitely a bandit that one. Tonight we dance with our backs to the wall, Rodney! Rodney Wonder what Monica's doing now? Del Well, why don't you phone Mickey Pearce, he might be able to throw some light on the subject! Rodney I don't talk to him no more! Del Hey look - come on, I'm your brother ain't I eh? You can tell me. What broke you two up? Rodney What do you mean 'What broke us up?' I found out he was dating Monica! Del No, not you and Mickey bloody Pearce - you and the fat bird! Rodney Oh! Well, she thought I was weird! Well not so much weird, more warped! Del Warped? Rodney Yeah. See I've got this fantasy! Uniforms, they turn me on! Del Uniforms? You mean like postmen and that? Rodney No, women in uniforms. Nurses, air hostesses and my favourites, policewomen. Del Policewomen? But they nick you. So what you're trying to tell me is that this Monica bird, the sort of like didn't go a bundle on this dressing up idea? Is that - that right? Rodney Oh I didn't tell her, I tried to do it without her knowing. Del How the hell do you dress some- one up as Juliet Bravo without them twigging? Rodney I was going to do it gradually, over a period of time. Last week was her birthday, right, so I bought her one of them blue serge suits that Paddy the Greek was selling, right. I already got her the hat, white with navy blue peak... and then for Valentine's Day I was going to get her some black stockings and some of them sensible walking brogues right...then for Christmas... Del A whistle and a set of hand- cuffs! Blimey you were lucky she gave you the elbow when she did, those Panda cars cost a bomb you know. Monica's right about you, you know - you're - you're a pervo Rodney. That is immoral, you know that, don't you? Rodney Immoral! Today you sold a clapped-out Batmobile with no brakes. That's immoral, son Del There was nothing wrong with that car. It went didn't it? Rodney Oh it went, yeah, just didn't stop. You're like the chairman of a cigarette company joining the Festival of Light. You can die for my profit, but don't play with yourself in between. Del Alright, alright Rodney. Yeah, well I didn't mean the geezer no harm did I? I'll pop round and see him tomorrow and pay to have his brakes repaired. How's that? Rodney That's good. If you do that for me I'll tell you what I'll do for you. Del You'll stop thinking about policewomen? Rodney No, I'll accept my 50 per cent of the profits. Del Oh my cup runneth over. The waiter returns with a lager for Rodney and a drink that looks like one of the Carmen Miranda's hats for Del. Waiter Half a lager for sir and a Caribbean Stallion for Mandingo. That'll be seven pounds. Del Seven quid, blimey I can get that for three quid where I come from. Waiter Oh you're from Jersey, are you? Enjoy your stay. Del What's he on about Jersey? Waiter By the way, the barman said would you like some evaporated milk with that? Del Tell the barman to go and get stuffed. Waiter Thank you, sir. Del Oh - thank you sir. Rodney Del! Del! Rodney indicates to two girls at the bar. Del What? No not yet it's only twenty to eight. If we pull them now we'll have to buy them drinks all night. Rodney But we could take them back to the flat. Del Hey that's an idea, I've got 24 litres of that Yugoslavian Riesling in the garage. We could pop old Grandad in the meter cupboard and have ourselves a little party. Rodney Yeah, yeah, go on Del. You can charm a tortoise out of a shell you can. Go on. Del Okay. Now you look, learn and listen, right. Del smoothes his way over to the bar and talks to the two girls. After a very short length of time he smoothes his way back over to Rodney. Del Drink up, we're leaving. Rodney Oh you are great, you are. You're the last miracle left in the world. Del Shut up and drink will yer! Rodney Yeah, yeah, are they a couple of ravers? Del They're a couple of geezers. As Rodney and Del exit the girl turns to reveal they are a couple of transvestites. WEST END DISCO. Del is leaning against the bar, sulking. Rodney is watching the dancing. Rodney I'm sorry. Del What? Rodney I said I'm sorry! Del Shut up. Rodney I didn't know it was that sort of place, did I? Del A right bleeding night I've had. Become a member of a gay club, discovered me brother's a pervo, had a close encounter with two dockers in drag! You'd better not tell anybody about this, Rodney. I've got my macho reputation to uphold. I'm warning you, if one person - just one - calls me the Naked Civil Servant, and I'll kill you. Rodney Don't be silly Del. I'm hardly gonna go round bragging I saw my own brother trying to date a couple of transvestites am I? Del What? It was you who clocked them you - you - just shut up, shut up will you. Rodney surveys the room. He zeroes in on a couple of young girls seated at a corner table. One of the girls smiles at Rodney. Rodney smiles back. Rodney Del. Del Shut up. Rodney Corner table to your left. A couple of birds. Del Oh don't start that again, a couple of birds. It's probably Hinge and Bracket out having a pint. Rodney These are definitely feminine Del, all the lumps are in the right places this time. Del Yeah, where? (Rodney explains with gestures) No, I don't mean like that you wally, I mean where here? (He sees them) Yes that will definitely suit me. Right, come on, bellies in! Rodney Oi, let's just be ourselves this time shall we? None of your embarrassing lies! And don't try an' put me down! Del Alright! Alright! And don't you say I'm 35. Rodney Alright! Del Come on then, into action. Del saunters over to the table casually twirling the car keys around his finger. Del Whoops, sorry, look at that just dropped the keys to the white alpine E-Type Jaguar, eight track stereo, leather- look steering wheel! It's not my car, it's his. Rodney Yeah, yeah, it's my car! (Whispers) Cheers Del! Del That's alright. We're just using it while they service my Ferrari! Rodney He's 35! Del Sit down will you - sit down Rodney, keep yer brains warm! Go on son. You didn't mind if we join you girls do you, no? Good. This is my brother Rodney, and I'm Del, that's short for Derek, nice name that innit eh - Derek? The girls are trying not to laugh. Nicky Yeah, very nice. I'm Nicky, this is Michele. Rodney Nicky and Michele, they're nice names! Del Yes! Not as nice as Derek though, is it, that name? Nicky Oh no, not a patch on Derek! Rodney Er, do you come here often? Del I don't believe you, I don't believe you. Michele Yes - quite often. I haven't seen you here before! Del No, no, it's because we - you know - don't come to London very often. Michele Oh, where do you come from then? Rodney Peckham. Del Yeah. Originally. Originally from Peckham. But we spend most of our time abroad now for tax reasons. You know, yeah, we're on the international tennis circuit. Rodney Del. Del Yeah, he's an international professional tennis player and I'm his manager. You must have heard of Rodney, yeah Rodney. The sporting press call him Hot Rodney. Nicky Don't think I have. What's the surname? Rodney Trotter! Nicky Doesn't ring a bell, sorry. Del No, no that's because we generally concentrate on the big American tournaments, you see. Michele Do you ever play Wimbledon? Del No, no, we only do the big 'uns! We've jut come back from the Miami Open... Nicky Really? You're not very tanned for Miami, are you? Rodney No, no, it was an indoor tournament. Del Yeah, yeah, it's amazing that innit. I mean they call it the Miami Open and then they go an' hold it indoors. That's the Yanks or yer though eh? Anyway we can't complain like because he won it, he did, he er, beat that Jimmy Connelly in the final. Michele Jimmy Connelly? Don't you mean Jimmy Connors? Del No, he knocked that dildo out in the first round, nine sets to one! Actually we're only in London to get Hot Rodney here measured up for a new bat. Nicky It's a racquet! Del Bloody is the prices they charge, darling. No also we thought it might be an idea to give him some practice on grass you see. 'Cos over in the States they use that stuff called Astroturf. Michele What do you prefer, Rodney? Rodney Pardon? Michele What do you prefer? Astroturf or grass? Rodney I don't know. I've never smoked Astroturf. Del You wally! No, no, we're not really professional tennis players! Michele We know! Rodney We're just having a laugh. Del Yeah, just having a laugh that's all. Nicky What do you really do? Del We're Concorde pilots! CAR. Del Light me up a cigar will you Rodders? Del hands Rodney the cigar pack. Rodney removes the last cigar and throws the empty pack from the window. Rodney We have struck gold here Del Boy! Del It's the Klondike my son - the Klondike. I mean every bloke's dream innit, eh? Meeting a couple of sorts with their own pad in Chelsea. I hope it's a penthouse, because I'm a penthouse sort of person. Know what I mean, balconies - rubber plants, all that game. Rodney Hey if we can see them next Friday perhaps we can stay for the weekend. Del Yeah, watch Match of the Day! Rodney Yeah, won't have to spend much will we! Del Won't have to spend much... Honestly Rodney, when it comes down to the nitty gritty you are completely devoid of any je ne said quoi ain't yer? I mean, these aren't your two halves of Stingo, a packet of pork scratchings and Bob's yer uncle type! No, no, no, we'll take 'em to a Berni inn! Yes. Rodney I bow to your experience and wallet there Del. Hey, where's their phone number? Del Oh she wrote it down on my cigar pack. Rodney Ace! What - what cigar pack's that then Del? Del The one I just gave you. Rodney Del! Del Yeah? Rodney You know that cigar pack? Del Yeah. Rodney I threw it out the window about a mile and half back! Del Oh that's alright. You what? You pranny! Del slams on the brakes. The E-Type screeches to a halt. There is the sound of screeching brakes from a following car. The E-Type leaps forward as it is hit in the rear. There is the sound of splintering glass and metal. Del God! I don't believe it. I just do not believe it! Now look what you've done Rodney, you've smashed up Boycie's E-Type Jaguar. Rodney Me? You were driving it. Del Don't play bloody word games with me, Rodney! They alight from the E-Type. Del (screaming at the car behind) What's your game pal. What is your game, are you blind or something? The Aussie alights from the Zephyr. Aussie I'm really sorry about that mate, but the brakes on this thing are a bit dicky...You! I've been looking for you two Flaming Gollahs all day long...Now come here! Del and Rodney turn and run up the road with the Aussie in hot pursuit.

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