By: Jungle Bunny
I went to the movie theater Saturday hoping to see Bruce Almighty but by the time I arrived at the ticket booth it was all sold out. Naturally I thought about going to Block Buster and renting something else to fill the void but since I already took the five minute drive to the cinema, Too Fast Too Furious seemed like a good bet. I watched the first movie and didn�t really like it, but this movie wasn�t just Fast and Furious like its predecessor, no. This movie was TOO fast and TOO furious... let me tell you, I was quaking with anticipation just from the title.
The movie started out obvious enough. On the streets. Huge crowds, roaring engines, and scantily clad women on either sides. I knew even before the race started who would win... the main character of course, whose bad-ass driving ability makes him a sure favorite, but what I didn�t expect was what the race consisted off. To say, there were some curves and turbo boost (which reminded me of Mario Kart for SNES) but the ending was surely spectacular! It seems the person who arranged the race had also arranged a surprise for the crowd. The bridge before the finish line was retractable and retracted it was (so they would have to jump it like a ramp). That was some crazy shit right there! I used to do something like that on my bike when I was a kid. I even tried it with a snowmobile. To say the least it didn�t impress me much... I�ve never actually seen a car fly off a ramp like that, but I seriously doubt it would land safely or at least in one drivable piece. Even during my two experiences (listed above) I never landed so that I wouldn�t fly over my handle bars or somehow flip the snowmobile on top of me...
Next he was arrested, they knew he was once a cop and immediately put him on the case. How I wish this happened in the real world:
"Umm. Yeah."
"We looked even deeper into your files and saw that you were in cub scouts... We�d like to offer you a position on our staff."
"What? But why?"
"We�ve been stuck on this case for months. We need to fry bigger fish than you... With the abilities you�ve picked up in cub scouts you�re a sure fire bullet into the metaphorical heart of the kingpin, we need taken down. Are you in?"
"Under one condition... I need my friend Bumbles. I can�t work without him."
"Dammit Mr. Moore you ask for a lot. But we�re going to give it to you, seeing that you oblige to our only condition. That you stay clean throughout the case. Then, and only then, you�ll be awarded your freedom."
"Whatever..."
The police gave them cars and they had to work their way into the trust of some guy who wanted drivers to drive money from some trailer to an airport. Sounds pretty easy eh? Of course it does but that wouldn�t make for a very exciting movie (not that the predictability of this movie foreshadowed its excitement or anything...) There were a few more races then the end finally came just before I was about to leave the cinema. The drivers successfully achieved their goal of moving the money, and they disabled the bad guys while they were at it, but not before taking their own cut before the police arrived. So the good/bad guys (however you want to look at it) ended up with a clean record and some cash... how gay.
So what ACTUALLY happened during the movie plot wise? Two guys off the street ended up in a police case to bust some guy who wanted his money moved from point A to point B.
If you�re a car buff I suggest you go see this movie because the cars are pretty cool, but if you�re into plot lines and originality you might as well go rent something from Block Buster... I sure wish that I would have.