When I think of music one band in particular comes to mind. They are a local band with great promise, a band whose force could tip the scales into the hands of the good guys. Yes this is a force of pure righteousness. I'm talking about the band 440, No Catch. A band comprised of 4 people, Josh B., Danny H., Charlie C., and Josh A. Four different unique souls with different courses in their life form this entity. Although a time of hardship and pain would soon come into their lives. Would the band survive or just be tossed aside like many other hopefuls, such as, Vanilla Ice, New Radicals, Seven Mary Three, and many others. Only time can tell... but this is what I predict will happen.

-- Start Behind the Music of 440, No Catch --

Being young Josh B. besides wanting a better life wanted to give the gift of song to millions of people. Josh B. being blessed with an enormous Adam's apple could belch out the meanest sounding words you ever heard. He hardly got a sore throat from it too. Josh knew from the moment he breathed in his first breath he knew he was destined to dazzle audiences with his superior singing voice. Josh only needed a band, because everyone knows he would look like a fool standing up there all by himself so he needed a band. Josh soon met Danny H. in school. Danny was not blessed with the best of looks or even the greatest of heights but gosh darn-it he would make himself heard. Danny would learn to play guitar and strum out the mad riths that would perfectly complement Josh B.'s voice.

Danny and Josh soon became great friends and allies in the war against all music that is bad. Danny and Josh practiced together all the time, but then they realized that they needed more people. A 2 person band just wouldn't cut it. Charlie C. the man with the hands. If an instrument was invented Charlie could play it. Being a behemoth in stature Charlie pummeled the poor saps on the football field and yet still managed to be such a talented artist. The only thing larger than him is his ego. Charlie knew he was good and he wanted the whole world to know. Charlie wanted to be one of the greats like Randy Rhodes, Jimmy Page, or even Less Claypool. Charlie wanted to be a god of rock and roll. When he met Josh B. and Danny he found his musical soulmates. This band was nearly complete. And Josh B. already came up with a great name for it. 440, No Catch. An odd name you may say but it had a meaning behind it. Ted Bundey, mass-murdurer extrodinaire. He killed 40 people in 4 years and didn't get caught... get it now?

Everyband needs a drummer. The drummer is the glue that holds the band together. And 440, No Catch's glue would be none other than Josh A. Josh A. recently graduated from High School. He has been living in his parents basement and has a paper route. But when Josh A. wasn't out peddeling his bike he was in his parent's basement wailing on his drums he bought at a Pawn Shop. Danny H. was walking by Josh A.'s house when he heard the percussion that would change his life. He broke into Josh A.'s house and told him that he needed to join their band. Josh A. accepted because... I mean, what else is he going to do?

The band was complete and together they are a force that could not be ignored. Their mad riths made roofs shake and made dogs howl, indeed it is as if heaven above blessed this band. They had their first show too, the Ogemaw Heights Battle of the Bands 2003. The band had 3 short months to prepare, so they got to it. They never left Josh B.'s basement. Josh'B.'s mom who I might as well say... rocks the mullet hardcore brought them milk and cookies. The day finally came, the Battle of the Bands. Josh B. was sitting on the stage looking out at the auditorium, seeing the emtpy rows of chairs that would soon be filled with screaming fans that only wanted Josh B. for his money. His dream has been realized. He then got up and did a mic check when Danny came running in. Danny asked Josh B. if he knew where Charlie was... just then a nearby t.v. played a Pepsi commercial with Charlie in it! Charlie sold out! He's now strumming the Pepsi song on his guitar with Britney Spears dancing and Ozzy Osbourne singing! It is as if the forces of evil had plunged a knife into the backs of 440, No Catch. Josh B. crumpled feeling utterly betrayed. Just then a stoned Josh A. walked in, completely off his rocker. He just snorted a 12 inch line of crack! He soon started to bleed from his nose and his head exploded because everyone knows you don't snort crack... yeah He then collapsed. He needed medical treatment right away.

"It's like the world just closed up all around me man... I couldn't see anything, I could only hear Danny screaming in my ear. Man that f*#!ing bastard has an annoying voice." Josh A. said during an interview. Josh A. had been hiding his drug problem from the rest of the group from the beginning. "I just couldn't tell them about my problems, they respected me as a drummer and a friend. Living in my parents basement I don't have much friends." The band was at it's end... or so it seemed. Danny and Josh B. were the only two left, and just then. Internal conflicts began to arise. "Josh has to have everything his way!" Danny said in an interview, "Everything has to be 100% or none at all! He won't even sing a punk song because he feels punk music isn't as good as heavy metal! What a crock! What a self-indulged a$@hole!"

So now, 440, No Catch the dream of a young Josh B. is now in shambles. Josh B. took to the only thing he knew how to do... he wrote. "Man, my life was just in tatters at that time. My friends abandoned me, I was out of money, and I just hated life and everything in it. But I wasn't going to lower myself to their level. Danny wouldn't have it his way and just gave up, no I would stride to become a better person. So I sat down on the stage pulled out my notebook and began writing." Little did Josh know, that sheet of paper, would contain the very song that would lead them to glory.

Back in Hollywood Charlie was finishing up his commercial. He sat in his seat and listened to Ozzy Osbourne stammer about something. He couldn't quite make out what he was talking about. Just then his cell phone rang. On the other line was Charlie's mother, who gave Charlie the unfortunate news about Josh A. Charlie hopped on the next flight back home. "I just couldn't believed what happened. Josh seemed like a kid who had everything going right. Sure he lived in his parent's basement and had posters of Pink Floyd and The Grateful Dead plastered all over his room but you would never think that he would do drugs. It's some crazy stuff." Charlie said when we interviewed him. Back in Josh A.'s hospital room the band gathered while Josh A. made a recovery. There the band gathered and exchanged apologies, and with the money Charlie earned doing Pepsi commercials they were able to afford new equipment. So they did, and soon Josh A. recovered and they came back to Ogemaw Heights because, they wanted the best... and they got it. 440, No Catch. This is Son Pablo Renaldo signing off, drive careful, and godspeed.