If there is one thing I have learned from my Homesteaducation semester, it is how to take myself seriously. From creating my study plans to getting my proposals approved I downplayed my intended achievements, mostly as an emotional safely net. But now, as I have reached the other end of that tight-rope I called my senior study, I am on the verge of delusional self-grandeur. I have now come to a point where I am able to step back and, for the first time, distance myself from all it is that I have acomplished. With this new vantage point I am able to see what it isI have done for what it is, and appreciate it as such.
The construction of the house and greenhouse, and the season in the garden, seem to have been among many minor accomplishments for the semester. But, the overwhelming success that I feel comes from my ability to document and actively reflect upon such achievements from a more academic point of view. It showed me the potential I have to do something I am good at, take pride and joy in, and then write about my endeavors. That is where my personal astonishment stems from and my hopes and aspirations for the future take root. The crusade for self-sufficiency does not lead to just that: to be dependant on none other for sustenance or survival, it also entails being a pioneer, and a teacher to all those who choose to learn from my example.
This semester was not intended to be heavy on the writing, but has, in its own way, served much like a writing class. Instead of reading books about how to write effectivly I read books much like those I wish to write. Instead of practicing and polishing my own writing style, I concentrated on the experience needed to be able to write practically. Of all my accomplishments this semester, this was by far the greatest.
I have gained a great confidence with which to replace the self-doubt that has haunted me for years. Through this study, and other such oppertunities made availible to me by way of the progressive program at Green Mountain College, I have abandoned my tentative fears of the future for a feeling of purpose and direction, a solid base of experience, and a confident posture with which to proceed.
Thanks to those who kept pokeing me to keep the site updated and the pictures in focus, this was for you. The rest, obviously, was for me.
*Zakk* |
