| Lucas Heffer (exalted ruler of this website) I really don't want to do my own bio, because it IS my site and you should all know how great I am already. And modest too. Really. I think I'll go into shameless praise now... I am a good guy. Having no concept of what a good looking man is, I think I am attractive too. My standards of female beauty are ridiculously high. That may be a hindrance to any sexual gratification, but I'm still looking for the right one for me. Sure, love is desirable, but I won't turn down a hot girl ready to go. I don't play sports. I suck at most of them and I don't care. I don't like competition, either. I like to ride a bike occasionally, but I have slowed down quite a bit since my major spinal surgery in early 2001, that was due in part to a couple of major crashes. One involved a station wagon, and the other, well, lets just say that landing a 30-ft. jump parallel to the ground hurts. A lot. I don't get along with most of my family, except my dad's side, which is why I moved to my dad's after about 16 years with my mom, et. al. In retrospect, over a year after the move, I feel that my voluntary relocation was a good decision, because it helped me reconstruct positive relationships with my mother, stepfather, and brother and sister, whose personalities and ideologies would constantly clash with my own. Don't take that the wrong way; we didn't have political discussions at dinnertime or anything like that, just basic discrepancies in the philosophy of life. Suprised at the seriousness yet? Me too...It gets better... I wear black clothing quite often, but don't ask me why; I truthfully don't know, and I stopped psychoanalyzing myself years ago. My "style" is based on comfort, or in the case of many t-shirts, the desire to incite a reaction among the populace, rather than fashion. Generally, my chosen dress is a bit cheaper than the popular brands of the day, a testament to my college-student frugality, but I like the two pairs of Old Navy pants I own. I wish everybody were mellow, even moreso than I. There'd be no war or maliciousness, and that would be indescribably cool for a while, almost Utopian, 'til some asshole shows up and makes weed illegal again. Hold it: I'm not a pothead. I don't smoke cigarettes much, and I hardly drink. I've seen what happened to my parents, and I don't want that to be me, for the most part. I don't know exactly where I'm headed in life, but I know which paths to avoid. As does my father, I tend to swear here and there (all the time), but I can keep it under control for brief periods, with new acquaintances, and when I write. As you have read, or will read, I really thought I needed some "Sexual Healing," butI have come to realize that that is more a symbolic act than some sort of rite of passage that I, or anyone else for that matter, am entiteled to. But I reiterate, I will not turn down the opportunity for some bizarre self-righteous reason. Since I am a male youth, a relationship beyond the physical realm is of course welcome, but I am not averse to casual sex by any means. In fact, I'd probably relish the status of "fuck buddy". Unfortunately, my current status as a student 3000 miles from home hinders most chance for the former on either side of the country. Resisting the urge to go into any further detail and lose readers currently engaged with my more flippant, humorous writing, I'll end here. So, in conclusion, I'd like to summarize my personality in the way my Statistics teacher did to another faculty member: "A walking permutation". -Lucas K. Heffer OK. That's it. I hope you have noticed how wonderfully open I am, and I will gladly answer any personal question about me that you may have as honestly as possible. Sorry about how horrible this bio is, but I couldnt really trust anyone else to do it. Chris McEntee did a pretty good one for the National Honor Society, which we were kicked out of even before joining, but that was mostly B.S. It's around here somewhere. |
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