Author: RPcrazy and GillSculle
Category: DRR, DSR comedy/snark and pure silliness with the X-Files characters.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: The characters are not ours but they are fun to play with.
Summary: Scully and Reyes stunt doubles get up to mischief on the X-Files set.
Notes: This started off on the X-Files Official Site Message Board in the JD/RP folder and just grew. It was a whole lot of fun.
~~~~~~If you want as LAUGH � this is a MUST~~~~~~~
Feedback: RPcrazy � [email protected] and GillSculle - [email protected]
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 1 by RPcrazy and GillSculle
Kim Manners: Ready? ACTION
Doggett in bed shirtless. Two girls come in, one looking remarkably like Scully and the other the spitting image of Reyes (body doubles)
<< RPcrazy is Reyes double and GillsSculle is Scully double>>
They pounce on him, one licking his face, the other holding him down. He fights them off...
.....CUT!!.....
Kim Manners: No no no no!!! We have to do that one again girls. You have to look more tough.
The girls sport very big grins and nod at each other.
KM: Take 2 Ready? ACTION
Doggett in bed shirtless. The two girls come back dressed in camouflage gear and war paint. Reyes pounces on Doggett grabbing him in a karate hold while Scully licks his face. He tries to fight them off but, overcome with the flood of adrenaline, they overpower him and have their way...
......CUT!!.....
Kim Manners: Girls Girls Girls.. That's not in the script!
Take 3..... Ready? ACTION
��������.
After a number of takes..
Kim Manners gestures for the girls to come over to him. In a huddle he says,
Kim Manners: What were you doing there?
Scully double: We were just doing what the script said.
Reyes double nods.
He gets the script and looks up the page and points to the lines.
Kim Manners: It says here you <<jump *on* him>> not you <<*jump* him>>.
Both girls feign enlightenment and go back for Take 10... hehehe
�������.
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 2
Kim Manners *chin leaning on palm of hand* : Ok, let's go for lunch... Let's try this again after that. *walks off mumbling to himself*
*The girls look at each other and shrug.*
*RP looks scared. He tries to edge himself away slowly from the two stunt doubles*
*He accidentally hits a chair and knocks over a camera*
<SND=crash>
*the girls look around and grin at RP*
" Uh oh.. " - RP.
*RP starts running*
*The girls run after him with lassos*
" Come on! Let us play! We-toosh! " - One girl says. *whipping lasso*
*RP runs faster running around the set passing the other cast members screaming*
" Help me! Somebody help me!! " - RP.
*Other cast and crew members just laugh and thank god it's not them being chased*
*RP stops because he can't see them chasing him anymore*
*He breathes harder and rests for a second*
*One of the girls jumps out from behind a camera*
" Boo! " - Girl.
" Ack! " - RP. *scream*
*RP runs*
*RP falls over*
" Hello.... " - Girls.
*RP lying on the floor scared*
" Don't hurt me... " - RP
" Aww, bless. How cute.. " - One girl says to the other.
*Kim Manners shouts to the girls* : " Come on you two.. back to shooting! "
*Kim looks down at RP and shakes his head.*
" You too Robert.. Stop playing with the fans. "
*The girls grin at RP, giggle and return to their starting points reading to start shooting again*
*RP slowly follows*
" Damn... I need a rest.. " - RP.
�������
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 3
KM: Take 37 Ready? ACTION
Doggett is sitting at his kitchen table eating pop tarts when there is a knock at the door. On answering he is surprised to see what very much looks like his two FBI partners dressed in jungle greens and war paint.
JD: Come in girls I'm just having breakfast..
DS: We'd love to Agent Doggett
MR: Do I smell coffee?.
They are ushered in and sit with him sharing pop tarts, coffee and conversation.
Kim Manners: Cut! and that's a wrap.......
RP's head hits the table exhausted.
KM calls the girls over, motioning with his hand and head.
KM: Thankyou girls for cooperating finally. That was a wrap after the first try. *Surreptitiously he hands the two girls the key to RP's trailer.*
������..
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 4
*The girls grin and make their way out the studio*
*They make their way to RP's trailer and "investigate"*
" Hey! Lookie at this! " - one of the girls.. holding up a pair of boxers.
" So... he wears boxers then? " - the other girl. ! ((solving the "BOXERS OR BRIEFS question.))
*One of the girls swings them over her head and runs around the trailer with them on her head*
" Aaaaaahhh.... " - screaming around the room.
*The other girl investigates RP's wardrobe*
*She pulls out a white shirt and some tight jeans*
" Oooohh.. nice! " - girl.
*They hear a noise at the trailer door-someone is coming in*
*The girls stare at each other*
" Sh*t! "
*Then run around the room trying to find hiding places*
*One hides in the shower and the other in a clothes cupboard*
*RP walks in*
" I know... I will be there in a bit. " - RP, shouting to someone outside.
*RP walks in*
*Takes off his shirt and flings it on the bed. One girl can see through the cupboard door and grins*
*The other girl is waiting*
���������������.
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 5
Scully double in the clothes cupboard: �Oops � he�s coming this way�.
RP opens cupboard and pulls out a clean shirt oblivious to the prying eyes behind the clothes.
He puts his clean shirt on the bed and goes towards the shower.
Just as he reaches in and turns on the faucet *whoosh of water* he hears a voice at the door again.
�Hurry Robert, you�re on NOW� He quickly grabs his clean shirt and leaves.
Scully Double whispers: �Hey, he�s gone�. She cautiously leaves her hidey-hole and goes towards the shower. *Lots of laughter* as Reyes double comes out of the shower drenched. Scully double throws her a towel.
Once dryish they both have lots of fun prying through RP�s trailer.
They open the fridge.
Reyes double: �Eeerr, what�s that.?
Scully double: �I think it�s a jar of artichoke hearts.�
Scully double points to something white and gooey looking. �And that?�
Reyes double: �Looks like a blancmange, and it�s shaped as a face.�
Scully double: �I tell you what, it looks a lot like poochespup�. Both giggle and dance around the trailer.
Just then the door opens and in walks RP.
��������.
*They both look at each other in shock*
*They both stare as RP walks in and stand as statues hoping that RP will just not notice to fans in his trailer* .
*RP walks in, stops and stares at them*
*He smiles and laughs a little*
*He walks up to the Reyes double and stares right at her face*
*He moves around her*
*Reyes double stays still*
*RP does the same to the RP double*
*The doubles make eye contact with each other briefly*
*RP stands in between them*
" Well.... Hello girls... " - RP, with a smile on his face.
" I did not imagine this... Why ARE you in my trailer? And WHY have you been in my drawers? MY BOXERS!!! "
RP, as he runs over to the clothes all over the floor.
" What HAVE you been doing?? " - RP, while holding up his boxers.
*The girls say nothing and stay still*
*RP puts his hand on their shoulders and tries to force them out*
" Now... c'mon... Leave.. " - RP, pushing them out gently.
*The girls move, hesitantly*
*They stand outside the trailer and RP leans out ready to shut the door*
" Now... you two, stay away from my trailer.. You hear? Ok.. Good.. Now, where is my blancmange?.. " - RP, to the girls as he shuts the door... he gives them both a wink before he goes in. :D :D :D
*The girls stare at each other and then burst out into laughter*
" Holy Cr*p! Who's been in my fridge?!?! " - RP, shouting from inside the trailer.
*The girls walk around the trailer and find an open window*
*They look through*
*RP spots them*
" Hey! Hey! Hey! Stop that! " - RP, walking over to them inside his trailer covering his chest up with his shirt he just took off.
*The girls retreat and go to the set to wait for him to come out* ;) :D
�������..
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 6
RP peruses his script for the next scene.
RP: �Oh NO!!!!!!!� He hits his head in frustration. �Those girls again! Why can�t we get normal stunt doubles.�
Scene � Doggett and Scully are on an x-file at the local dump. They had a tip off that there had been strange sounds coming from that region recently. They needed to investigate.
Scully: �Agent Doggett. Can you hear anything?� Doggett listens carefully and gradually walks behind a pile of trash.
Doggett: �I think we�ve found our culprit� He pulls out the Scully double by the elbow.
Scully: �What are you doing here?�
Scully double: �What are *you* doing here?�
Scully: �I asked you first.�
Scully double: �I asked you second � ha ha�
Scully: �I�m the one needed for this scene.�
Scully double: �No, I am.�
Scully: �The real Scully is needed for this scene.�
Scully double: Yes, and I�m the real Scully.�
Scully: �No, I am.� Doggett scratches his head in confusion looking from one Scully to the other.
They keep bantering until they hear a strange sound over by a smashed up car.
Out comes a weird creature dressed with glowing antennae, vampire teeth, spring-loaded eyeball glasses, monster slippers and a lab coat with sticky-taped trash attached to it.
Doggett looks even more confused.
Doggett: �Is that you Reyes?�
�������..
The Stunt Doubles" Part 7.
*Reyes double comes out*
" Come on! This is just pathetic! Not you again! " - RP, to Reyes double then to Kim Manners.
*Reyes double walks up to Scully double and they shrug at each other*
*(real) Scully sighs and walks off shaking her arms up in the air as if saying "Why me?"*
*Reyes' and Scully�s doubles stand staring at RP*
*RP stares back*
*Doubles giggle at RP*
*RP (giggles) back*
*They all become serious again and stare at each other again*
*They all exchange eye contact from one another*
"Ooooh-kaaayy." - RP, looking away.
*The Scully double tags on the Reyes' doubles arm*
" Pssst.. Let's go to Skinner's Office!" - Scully double dragging Reyes' double away - still staring at RP.
*Reyes' double being dragged by Scully double to Skinner's office*
*They both walk in*
*Scully breathes in and breathes out*
*Reyes' double looks at her weirdly*
" Oooh, chair! " - Scully double while running to Skinner's spinning chair.
*She jumps onto it and starts spinning around*
" Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee..... " - Scully double, spinning around.
*Reyes' double rolls her eyes - she plays with the FBI badge (Doggett) that she took from the props room*
*Gillian walks in, she sighs when she sees the girls*
*Gillian stands in the middle of the room staring at them*
" Hello, you two... again. " - Gillian.
*RP (jigs) his way in, dancing and humming his way around the room*
**He hums to "Luck Be a Lady Tonight"** - Ha! Ha!
*Scully double stops spinning, grins, laughs and stands up to join RP (jigging) in the middle of the room*
*The Reyes double joins in too*
*They all, the Reyes and Scully double and RP dancing in the middle of the room humming to "Luck Be a Lady Tonight"*
*Gillian sighs and hits herself on the forehead with the palm of her hand*
" Oh man! " - Gillian exiting the room.
�������..
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 8
The errand boy (whatever they�re called) walks into Skinner�s office and stops.
Errand Boy: �Oh there you are Mr Patrick.� He looks at all the jigging and singing and screws up his nose, looking puzzled.
RP looks up and blushes. The doubles continue jigging and singing around the room.
Errand Boy: �Mr Manners wants you on set pronto.�
RP follows the errand boy and looks back to see that the doubles are none the wiser at his departure.
The two doubles bump into each other then stare into each other�s faces. Simultaneously they look around the room to see that the object of their affection has left.
They rush out of the room and see the red scarf and medallion on Skinner�s secretary�s desk.
Scully double: �I have an idea.� She grabs the items.
Reyes double: �Oh goody, your ideas are always so wicked.� She rubs her hands together.
Scully�s double leads Reyes� double to the Doubles Common Room to get the Kim Manners double. On the way back to the set they explain their plan.
On the X-Files set.
Doggett: �Hamburgers are invading Czechoslovakia.�
Reyes: *laughs* �I thought the line was <<Rainbows are evading Macedonia>>?�
�..CUT��.
Both girls ambush KM and gag him with the red scarf while KM double goes on set and hypnotises Doggett and Reyes.
KM double: �Here�s a technique I�ve heard about to help you remember your lines. Just watch the medallion.�
Their eyes move back and forth. �You are getting sleepy. You will do what I say. Agreed?�
Doggett and Reyes: �We will obey� *mesmerised*
KM double moves back behind the camera.
Ready? ACTION
KM double: �Reyes take Doggett�s shirt off.�
Both girls are panting.
KM double: �Now swap shoes.�
*lots of giggles*
KM double: �Doggett lick Reyes� nose.�
Doubles: Ooooooooh.
KM double: �Mess each other�s hair up.�
*more giggles*
KM double: �When you both wake you�ll have an irresistible urge for candy snakes.�
On the count of 3 you will wake and not remember anything I�ve told you.
1��2��3
�����������.
"The Stunt Doubles" : Part 9
*The doubles chit-chatter while they wait to be needed for the next scene*
*Reyes' double goes to get a drink*
*Scully double sits on her own picking her nails*
*RP walks by whistling*
*Scully double grins while he walks past*
*He walks past and notices she is watching him*
"Yes? Ooh, it's you... Good-bye.." - RP, walking off.
*Scully double gets on the phone to Reyes's double*
" He's coming your way.. heads up. " - Scully double to Reyes' double.
*RP turns the corner to be faced with Reyes' double smiling at him*
" Woah! " - RP, startled.
" Hello there Mr. Patrick. " - Reyes' double, seductive voice. Twiddling his tie.
*RP pushes her away gently and tries to edge away*
" Ha. " - RP, walking off.
*Scully double greets him around the next corner*
" Hi! " - Scully double to RP.
*RP sighs*
*She grins at him*
*He smiles and rolls his eyes*
" What -is- it that you want from me? " - RP, gesturing with his hands.
*Her grin widens*
*-silence-*
*Scully double moves closer and sneaks in a snog* - :D :D :D
*RP stands back stunned, his eyes wide open*
*Reyes� double comes around the corner with hands in her pockets, she stares at them both*
" So.... " - Reyes' double to them both.
*Scully double whispers to Reyes double, they both giggle while looking at RP (still stunned.)*
*Reyes' double moves closer to RP*
" Oh no! Not another one.. Plea--- " - RP, kissed by Reyes' double before he can finish his sentence*
*The doubles smile and walk away*
*RP standing there still stunned*
*KM double comes up to RP, pats him on the back and says*
" Those two are trouble..... " - KM double, with arm over RP's shoulder.
"Come on.. More scenes to do. " - KM double to RP pulling him off for more ~scenes~ - LOL.
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 10
ON SET: SCENE.
*RP walks onto the set they are about to do a scene for, Reyes' and Scully doubles are there *as usual*, they wink and smile at him*
*RP walks over to GA*
" Are they ever going to go? " - RP to GA.
" I don't think so... but, I'm going kick that Scully double's *ss if she doesn't stop taking my taking my security badge and claiming to be me and getting into all the off-access areas. It SO f*cking p*sses me off! " - GA, giving an evil to Scully double.
~~On other side of the room~~
" What's her problem? " - Scully double to Reyes double staring back at GA.
*They set up for shooting*
*KM double brings in a pogo stick*
*Hands it to RP*
*RP stares at it*
" ACTION! " - KM double.
*RP stares blankly at pogo stick then at GA*
" CUT! " - KM double.
" What are you doing?? " - KM double to RP, walking over to him.
" I... What am I supposed to do with THIS? " - RP, pointing to pogo stick.
" What other people do with a pogo stick. Duh! " - KM double.
" What? I am not doing that! It would make me look stupid. " - RP.
" You're doing it... Now, come on people. Let's get this done before Christmas.. " - KM double going back behind camera.
" Okay, ACTION!! " - KM double.
*RP gets on pogo stick and starts bouncing around the room on it, he also says his lines*
" You see Agent Scully. I can't believe a story like this. It doesn't seem right. Anyway.. " - RP, on pogo stick.
<SND=thud>
*RP goes out of control and falls off*
*Reyes' double goes in to help him up*
*RP puts his hand on his head, that he hit the floor with*
" Awww, my baby.. " - Reyes' double, rocking RP back and forth in her arms*
������������..
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 11
ON LOCATION � Pansytown Horticultural Fair
Doggett, Scully, Mulder and Skinner are all riding along Highway 53 in their rental car. Doggett is driving.
Mulder: �Doggett, why *are* we going to Pansytown anyway?� Mulder emphasises *pansy*.
Scully: Mulder, I told you already back at your apartment.
Mulder: Tell me again Scully. I must have been distracted by that video I was watching.
Scully: *uses flashy hand actions and disjointed words to explain the case*
Mulder: �That must have been a really good movie.�
The others all go �ahhhh�, nod their heads and leave it at that pretending they understand.
Doggett: *looking in rear view mirror* �Ah guys, I think we�re being followed.�
They all look around. �That car has been following us all the way from the office.
Skinner: �How do you know it�s the same car?�
Doggett: �The big model clown�s head on top is kinda hard to miss don�t you think?�
The Scully and Reyes doubles have smirks on their faces noticing all four faces staring at them from the car in front, one through the rear view mirror.
PANSYTOWN
The rental car pulls up at the fair and all four agents notice a huge, gathering crowd in front of a stage and are curious. The clown car pulls up behind them.
The doubles girls flash their Scully and Reyes FBI badges they�d bought from the Fox Studios giftshop, shouting �FBI, FBI� and get through the swelling crowd easily to just in front of the stage.
Organiser: �Okay everyone, no need to worry, our guests have finally arrived.� He goes down to usher the four real FBI agents up on stage. They struggle but on seeing all eyes on them they smile politely and follow the man up the steps.
Organiser: �Let�s all welcome our guest speakers, Petunia Lofty, Rose Flutterby, Brian Ivy and Tim Oak.�
The crowd cheers, applauds and wolf whistles. �Our four guests are now going to share their vast knowledge and experiences of the many varieties of roses.�
Scully: �Ahhhhh��ummmm�. I have roses at home�. They�re pretty� and they�re pink.� *and so is her embarrassed face � she looks to a smirky Mulder.
Mulder: �Hmmmmm �I talk to my roses.� He looks over to Skinner.
Skinner: �One day I had roses and the next day they were gone.�
Doggett: *Pointing to himself and mouthing a �me�?�* �My roses have thorns� and leaves��
*Silence, then�. The crowd cheers and applauds loudly.*
Scully and Reyes doubles still raucously laughing get up on stage, jump off and crowd surf.
��������
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 12
There�s a ring and all six car occupants attempt to pull out their cell phones. *much pushing and shoving *
*A car toots*
�John Doggett.�
�Scully.�
�Mulder�
�Reyes� Stunt Double.�
�Scully Stunt Double�
*no answers*
�Skinner.�
Kersh: AD Skinner, I was expecting a call from you. What�s the situation there?
Skinner: We�re just on our way back from the Horticultural Fair sir. Sorry we�re late but our car broke down and we were forced to take a ride home with the two stunt double.
Skinner looks around the car embarrassed to say that the six of them are all squashed into a small car with a clown�s head on the top. Reyes� double has a smirk as she�s sitting on Mulder�s lap. Scully�s double pretends to kiss Scully while resting on her lap.
Kersh: When do you think you�ll be back then?
*Cars tooting their horns*
Skinner: Sorry sir could you repeat that? All these cars are sounding their horns for some reason.
Kersh repeats his question. Skinner looks at his Mickey Mouse watch.
Skinner: In about an hour sir.
Scully: Stop the car!
Doggett pulls over to pick up Reyes who is hitchhiking.
Reyes: Hi guys, give me a lift?
She squashes into the car and sits on Doggett�s lap.
*Ten minutes later*
*Cars still tooting*
The car screeches to a halt.
The car occupants all chime. << What did we hit?>>
Doggett and Reyes in unison. <<snakes>>
The car occupants all look out the windows.
Doggett and Reyes get out of the car, scoot into a shop and come out with armsful of candy snakes.
Doggett: Mon, look at the numberplate of this car.
Reyes:* laughing hysterically* HONK ME.
����������
" The Stunt Doubles ": Part 13.
*Scully, Reyes, Doggett, Mulder and Skinner turn up outside the FBI HQ in the clown car*
*Horns are honking*
*They all come out-in a clown style*
*Kersh stands on the sidewalk staring and snarling*
*Reyes and Scully doubles get out too and both stand next to Doggett gawking at him*
Kersh: Skinner? Doggett? Explain this! *snarling*
Skinner: Well, it all started when we meet these too *pointing at the stunt doubles*...
Kersh: *putting his hand up*.. Stop there! We have been looking for these too for quite a while.
*Everyone turns around and stares at them both*
*Both giggle-then stop giggling when the others don�t join in*
*They look at each other, jump into the car (stunt stuff) and drive off*
*All the agents stare as they leave*
Doggett: Humm... I was starting to get used to them as well...
Scully: Don't be stupid Agent Doggett.
Reyes: I agree. Agent Scully.. Doggett shut up...
*Doggett shies away*
CUT TO.
*Doubles in the car*
Scully double *driving*: What are we going to do now?
Reyes double *looking at huge map*: We could try and get in through the back.. I know the LGM.. We could ask for a favour.. Of course you�ll have to help me out a little.
*Scully double nods*: Ok... sure, fine, whatever...
*Scully brings the car to an abrupt halt*
<SOUND=screeech!!>
Reyes double: Woah.. What was that for?
Scully double: We just drove off the set.. Where are we? This isn't Washington D.C *staring out the front window at the alien pods*
*Scully reverses*
<SOUND=thud, thud, thud>
*Crew member shouts out*-" No!! Someone just ran over the LGM!! Get a medic!! "
*Reyes double and Scully double stare at each other*
" Sh*t! "- in unison.
*Scully double reverses the car faster and guns it*
*Crewmembers shake fists and shout. - can be seen in the rear view mirror*
Scully double *looking back*: Mad people.. pftf..
Reyes' double nods: You said it!
*Reyes' double opens up a pack of CANDY SNAKES and chews on them*
Scully double staring at Reyes' double: Where you get those?
*Reyes' double, mouth full: Annabeth left a pack un-guarded *laughs*...
*Scully and Reyes' doubles laugh hysterically*
*Scully double pulls up outside the "Skinner's Office" set*
" Oooooh.. Nice chance to see Mitch.. "
*Scully double jumps out the car*
" You coming? " *to Reyes' double still in the car*
" No.. I'm staying here.. RP has to come out sometime.. and when he does.. *squints*.. "
" Sure... ok. " :) *Scully double skips into the set*
*Walks to Skinner's Office, past all the crew members*
*Walks into Skinner's office*
" Oooooh.. " *looking around*
*Runs up to the chair, spins around in it*
" Wheeeeeeeeeee..... "
*Falls off chair*
*Gets up, Mitch stands leaning over, looking down at Scully double*
" Hello there! " ;) *waves, smiles*
*RP and Reyes' double walk up the Skinner's Office's door*
*Reyes' double in RP's arm*
*RP knocks on the door*
" Hey you two.. "
*Scully double laughs and waves, from the floor*
����������
" The Stunt Doubles " Part 14.
All characters and crew are assembling in Scully�s apartment � Doggett, Scully, Reyes and the two female stunt doubles.
Scully sneers across to her Scully double who looks back with a goofy smile.
Kim Manners is seen showing the Scully double how she will need to take over from Scully in the *swinging on the light fitting* scene.
Kim Manners looking across at Reyes double: And you will need to catch the Scully double as she drops.
Scully walks across to Scully double: I�ve had it up to my eye teeth with you Missy!
She grabs her by her shirtfront and they wrestle and roll on the ground.
KM: Oh goody, looks like a good addition for the next scene *to cameramen* Roll cameras!
Reyes and her double see the action on the ground and both go in to help. They each grab hold of a seething Scully.
Scully: You little twerp!!
Other Scully: You bucket nose!
Scully: You mop-hugger!
Other Scully: I like mops so much!?!
She storms off to the mop cupboard and Scully follows. The second Scully pushes her in and locks the door.
She brushes off her hands and returns to the set.
KM looking confused: Scully?
Scully: Yes Kim, it�s really me.
No one notices the cheeky glint in Scully�s eye.
����������
NOTES
Okay Becky - here are my ideas for the rest of the story.
Then I'll format it all and send it to Sarah's Scully and Doggett Funny Fanfic site.
I'll email the whole thing to you too and you may find other sites to submit it if you wish.
Part 14 - (already done) - the Scully double has replaced Scully - for good - hehe
Part 15 - Maybe you could write a scene where the Reyes double replaces the real Reyes.
Part 16 - The real Scully and Reyes aren't believed that they are the real ones and we can work out somewhere they can end up. My daughter suggested Scully to a mental asylum and Reyes to a pig farm - LMAO.
Part 17 - Now that the Scully and Reyes doubles have successfully taken over from the real characters there are stirrings of discontent from the doubles common room. The other doubles want to be in the *real* action. Gradually over the next few weeks they take over sending the real characters to places of no return.
The show ends up being "The X-Files Circus".
Whattaya think? hehehe
AnneB (reallyRPcrazy)
"The Stunt Doubles" : Part 15.
*Scullyx2 (double) goes to other part of set, trying to find RP* (VEG)
"Robert?... Mr. Patrick?.. Hello?... " *Wandering around the studio*
*RP notices her coming towards him, he turns, and runs*
" Wait!!! " *runs after him, crew members laugh*
Meanwhile... Back with Reyes and Reyesx2.
" So... " Reyesx2.
" Uh huh.. " Reyes. *picking her nails*
" You got the hots for Robert, haven't you?.." Reyesx2. *wicked smile*
" What?... " Reyes *confused*
" click.. click.. nudge.. nudge.. ay! ay! " Reyesx2 *nudging Reyes*
" Will you stop that! " Reyes *irritated*
*Reyesx2 stops, sees RP come around the corner, pushes Reyes into him*
"Errrr...... Sorry.. " RP to AG.
" Yeaah... Sorry.. " AG to RP.
*RP hears Scullyx2 calling in the background*
" Gotta run.. "
*runs*
*both women stare as he runs, checking out his butt*
" So... "
(AGAIN)
1 hour later...
" Ooooh. What are they doing over there? " *Reyesx2 pointing to the large spaceship prop being elevated on another set section*
*Reyes sighing* "It's a spaceship.. for the abduction scene...... "
*Reyes rolls her eyes and moves away towards it*
" Dumb stunt doubles... Don't know anything about the script.. " *mumbling*
*Reyesx2 sticks her fingers up at her from behind, then follows, smiling*
*They both inspect the craft, not filming*
" Ooooh, would you look at him! " Reyesx2 *looking inside*
" Who?.." *inquisitive Reyes*
" David.. He's in there.. " Reyesx2 *points*
*Looking inside* "Where? *grinning* I don't see him... *frown* " Reyes.
" Just there... What, you don't see him?.. " Reyesx2, luring her in more and more..*VEG*
" Where?.." Reyes *echo, because she is so far in*
*Reyes steps her foot in, then the other.. and explores*
"Where? I don't see him.. " Reyes, inside.
" Just there.. in there.. " Reyesx2.
" I don't think he is in here! " Reyes. *moaning*
" Ooh.. my bad.. it's just the light.. " Reyesx2, grinning, slams the hatch*
*Walks off, grinning*
" Where did AG go?.. We need her for the next scene!.." KM to crewmember.
"I'm here! " Reyesx2. *shouting to KM, holding arm up*
*KM scratches head*
" Ookkkaaay.. Have you changed your hair? Make-up? " KM.
" No.. why? " Reyesx2 *smiling nicely*
*Scullyx2 comes to the set, smiles at Reyesx2, They stand next to each other, high five each other, grin at each other*
*RP nervously walks in, his hair all muffed up and tie undone*
*Scullyx2 grins at Reyesx2*
*They both smile and start to cackle and laugh evilly*
" Mwahah Ha ha ha ha ha!!! " *Reyesx2 & Scullyx2*
*The crew and cast stand watching, afraid and confused*
" Excuse me!... Show to do here.. Can we? " KM. *pointing to the set*
*They both smile and proceed to the set to start filming*
�������������.
�The Stunt Doubles� Part 16
*Scully knocks trying to get outside closet*
� Someone!!! Help!! That d*mn stunt double locked me in here!! I�m gonna get her�.. and her little Dog(gett) too!�
*Scully shuffles around, trying to find something to ram the door open with*
*Scully finds a broom and rams the door with it*
*She storms out to be confronted with two men in white coats, with a straight jacket, and KM*
*KM stands tutting*
� You really have caused yourself a lot of trouble, haven�t you? � Shakes head.
� What??? What are you talking about?? It�s that damn stunt double� isn�t it? �. She did this not me!! I am in the real Scully� It�s me.. Gillian.. remember?� �
*Scully acts insane, pulling at KM�s t-shirt.
The men in white coats come towards her*
� Noooo.. Nooo.. .. THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!! � *Scully screams*
� Uh uh Missy.. that�s copyrighted�. Say something else.. � � CC tutting, as if coming from nowhere.
� How about����*thinks*����.. F*ck You! � �GA. mean face .
*Everyone in the room makes a loud gasp*
*GA sighs and rolls her eyes*
*The men restrain her and carry her off kicking and screaming
She curses at CC and KM as she leaves, they stand tutting and rolling their eyes at each other*
Meanwhile�
*AG is still stuck in the spacecraft prop*
*AG bangs on the inside and shouts to be let out*
*She pushes the entrance and falls out*
*She looks around and finds that she is no longer on the X Files� set*
*She is on the set of an animal Sci-Fi movie, there are pigs surrounding her, snorting*
*She wipes her suit and gets up, and looks around*
�Hello??�-she calls to any member of the crew.
*A crew member walks up to her*..
�You�re On!! Where have you been?�� He pushes her towards the outside of the pigs pen and clicks his fingers to get the make-up artists over to put some make-up on her.
�Uh� but, I.. I�m an X Files star and.. I shouldn�t be on this set�. You see it all started when we got these stupid stunt doubles in..� - AG, moving around while make-up is being applied.
�I don�t care! Go.. Act!�- Crewmember, pushing her in front of the camera.
*The director comes up to her*
�Your motivation is.. You�ve just landed here in your spacecraft *points to spacecraft* and you have your first encounter with earth life *points to pigs*� and, you try to communicate.. �-Director, walking away slowly.
�But� I� I have just landed.....*looks around*.... So to speak.. �-AG, confused.
�Yes!! That is what I am talking about�. Go with that!!�- Director, by camera.
�ACTION!!�-Director yells.
*AG stares at pigs, then camera, then director, then pigs again. She sighs.*
�Aah, what the hell!�- AG, starts snorting.
�������������.
�The Stunt Doubles Season Finale� Part 17
On the X-Files set.
It�s the final day of shooting for the season and the Scully and Reyes stunt doubles haven�t been found out. They have successfully taken over from the real Scully and Reyes who have both gone off to places of no return � for now at least. (Stunt Doubles 2? Haha)
The cast and crew have eased up a bit from their initial scepticism about the intentions of and weird actions of these two. There has been a little more humour on set now. GA and AG (woah � I just realised their initials are reversed � oooooh spooky) have lightened up considerably on set and even have the crew in fits of laughter with their funny antics. One day Scully brought a whoopee cushion along and had great fun seeing people�s reaction as they sat down and let rip.
No new stunt doubles are needed because both Scully and Reyes insist that they can do their own stunts from now on and of course they can. RP has been so pleased � those stunt doubles were trouble with a capital T.
However, now that the Scully and Reyes doubles have successfully taken over from the real characters there has been a stirring of discontent from the doubles common room.
Skinner double: Could I have everyone�s attention for a moment.
The doubles common room silences.
Skinner double: Thankyou. As you know, Scully and Reyes are not the real McCoys. They are like us. That peeves me somewhat. I think we can all do this. I say chaps let�s rise up and take over the set.
Doggett double puts up his hand: Sir, do I have to replace Doggett? I really wanted to be Scully.
Skinner just clicks his tongue and shakes his head with �what a silly question� written all over his face.
Skinner double: Gather round guys � I have a plan. *whisper, whisper*
Sirens can be heard in the distance and gradually become louder as they approach Fox Studios. The screech of car breaks is heard as a Police divvy van parks outside the studio.
Police Chief: Okay � where are they?
Skinner double feigning agitation: They�re all over there in the studio�s walk-in pantry. Please get them out of here. Charge them with unlawful impersonation.
The law drags all the protesting *real* actors out of the studio and into the waiting van.
Reyes Double to the police chief: Wait! Wait! Not that one! He�s the real actor.
She points to RP who is then released into Reyes�s arms. BWAHA BWAHAAAAAA!!!! (Now there�ll be one for each of us)
When the divvy van has left the lot Skinner gathers cast and crew together for a conference.
Skinner: I have an announcement to make.
There are excited murmurs coming from the new cast and crew.
Skinner: Instead of The X-Files I announce that from now on we be called �The X-Files Circus�
Cheering can be heard all the way out to the LA streets.
THE END
Watch out for �The Stunt Doubles 2� in your cinemas soon. Twice the action � Twice the fun OR �The Revenge of the *Real* McCoys� � hahahahahahahaha OR �Goose Liver Pate and Mudslides from Transylvania.� You can tell that was my daughter�s suggestion - LOL