It was a warm summer day…. Your typical summer afternoon… Your typical summer picnic… Making her typical disaster of the day…. Your typical Holly Berry Joan…. VBS week… Vacation Bible School… Kids from all over come and play games learn verses and most importantly, hear the gospel loud and clear. On the last day we had this huge picnic… everyone’s parents came, and the food was wonderful… hotdogs over the fire, homemade doughnuts, water melon, marshmallows… and the prized event of the year…the French-fry maker was going… All year long people look forward to VBT for two reasons… the homemade donuts, and the homemade French fries… The doughnuts are made in the morning… but the French fries are cooked as they come… and it seems to take forever… Our cook Tim, missed the whole picnic, he was making frech fries the WHOLE time… And poor guy, mean while all the guests were down the hill at the picnic area asking, “Are there more french-fries? When are they coming? Is someone going to go get the french-fries?” There were three batches I believe… and there would have been enough to satisfy everyone and his brother…but… YOU KNOW ME! The first batch was gone, and I on a mission of mercy walked up the hill to the church to check for more fries… they were done! Yeah! So I brought them down and set them on the table… It’s kinda funny how that works… You didn’t really do anything…but people start thanking you, and pretending you’re a great hero… and everyone did… “Yeah the fries are here!” and so we ate them… and they were gone… and once again I started making trips up and down… were the fries done? Everyone was waiting… and waiting and waiting… It was quite a while later when I brought the last batch down. A HUGE cookie sheet HEAPING to almost overflowing full of fries… as I carried it to the serving table, a large cheer went up… “YEAH!!!!” Someone said, “Bring them over here, so we don’t have to get up!” And I turned to look who… I was stopped… and suddenly… those beautiful fries… I don’t know how it happened… it honestly makes NO sence… all of those fries… I was holding the tray in my hand one second… and the next? It was like a physical force pushed up from the bottom of the tray… I declare… It wasn’t me… wasn’t the wind… but there they went… it was like slow motion… they went UP UP UP... as the tray flipped in mid air… and then I watched in horror as they came down… slowly… like a jerking picture movie… I dived for them… but it didn’t work… all those fries… spread from one end of the patio to the other… in a long line of golden goodness… and I stood there like a dummy… staring at what I had done… And then one of the ladies reached out to the tray and said… “Oh look, there’s ONE left!” and she ate it…. It was about that time I looked around… and saw all the faces… I SO wished I could sink into the floor… I never wanted to go to church again… ever! But I did… and they forgave me… however… I doubt I will be carrying the fries this year…. ha ha! EVEN ON REQUEST!


July 2003, and written June 2004.