This Never Happened

You'd think that I'd be prepared under circumstances like these. These circumstances being that I didn't take the time to write anything for this week, backups for which having been pre-written and somesuch. Well, I do have two pre-written "thingies," if you will. But they're not funny and I don't want to post them. Yet. So I'll try to give you as much comedy as possible in the shortest amount of time, as Greg is updating his website as I speak:

Now, prepare yourselves for something even ruder:

Here is a queue of titles I had written up but will probably never use:

A quote I had saved for just such an occasion:

And finally, the ultimate round of hilarity:

You can�t do better than making fun of people with terminal illnesses. Or black people. Or the homeless. Or the hungry. Or beached whales. Or small, defenseless, inherently stupid children. Maybe this stopped being funny a long time ago. Maybe it never was funny in the first place. Maybe you don�t know Jack. I met him once. He�s a cool guy. Starin� at a thing in a bag. If someone complains to me at Neo325 (at) msn (dot) com, I�ll come up with something more meaty later this week. Or possibly even later tonight. It all really depends on when Greg feels like posting it. Since it�s his website. And not mine.