*reagent: a substance used in a chemical reaction to detect, measure, examine, or produce other substances
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| eavesdropping is so popular, it done spilled over onto another page! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| i get a certain amount of discretionary funding... that i can use for travel... or reagents*. *reagent: a substance used in a chemical reaction to detect, measure, examine, or produce other substances |
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| totally deadpan: you can get like... five... fried waffle sticks for $1. i heard that on their commercial. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| my end goal is to eradicate the ugly people. (leslie's response: why would you want to do that, ugly?) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| i took an astrology class because i wanted to be a star expert. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| i've been double-jointed - in my whole body - for years now! that's uncle harry, explaining to the fox reporter how he can still shake it so well despite his advanced age | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| my sister-in-law and i prefer anal (said by leslie- surprised? not so much) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| did i ever tell you? somebody offered me $95,000 to impersonate jesus for a day... what did you say?.... i flat out refused and told them i was insulted. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| she's a fucking goddess. does everyone know that? because if you don't, you need to know this- she's a fucking goddess! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| it's like an armadillo- it's big and beautiful (keep in mind, this was in relation to an omelet- texas, i swear...) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| and now i'm twenty-four and one day old and that bites the big one! more drunken birthday quotes from leslie! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| it's not my fault- it's mah momma's, 'cause she had me. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| from a disgruntled high schooler who had subpar TAAS math scores... you know what? FUCK the texas department of math! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| all the guys i met through friendster are vegans. i wonder if there's something about a vegan lifestyle that lends itself to getting set up with friends-of-friends... | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| yeah, the waves... are like 7 feet tall... because of claudette. you can't go swimming because it'll drag you... over like... shells and... stuff. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| part of a phone conversation: yeah, i know mark. he and i are like this.... (pause)... i'm crossing my fingers right now. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| i'm not blaming my parents, but i mean, when you have six kids and no money... it's not a good idea. it isn't really even an idea- it's just sex. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| i want to kiss her, but i'm afraid i'll swallow her head. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| when i say 'older stuff' i mean like... velvet... yeah, the velvet... underground. no, velvet goldmine is like... a movie. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| don't you worry, girl. abundance! i'm from buffalo. (the buffalo part was said by way of explanation, though i don't think it made it much more clear. also, the girl didn't say anything in between this string of seemingly random phrases) | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| hey, that's a cool car. that's a hearse. wow. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ... heather was naked and spreadeagled the way i heard it... | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| so ya like that miller lite, huh? it's less...(pondering)...fatty (with extreme distaste). | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| you are such a big talking, small walking motherfucker! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| you know, i'm gonna go sit on that bench, because fuck those girls, man, they're never coming back. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| you can de-ribonucleic acid yourself right out of here! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| god damn it! i lost all my dna down the sink, 'cause i'm stupid! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| girls, if i hadn't have slept with him, i wouldn't have known his best feature... how fucked up is that, ladies?! | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| back to main | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||