Broken: Part Eight “Soft Whisper”

5/18/00

By: Hikari

Notes: none

All disclaimers apply.

*****

“Yukina-chan… daijoubu ka?” Genkai combed back a strand of her kinky hair behind her ear- setting her book on a mahogany table; she then focused her attention on my sister. I stood at the doorway, drowned in speechlessness at Yukina’s demeanor. Her face was tear-stained, cheeks flushed and eyes glazed over. Her lips were quivering relentlessly, and her whole body hiccupped from sobbing. She was sitting at her little brass bed, hair disheveled from her red ribbon. Yukina hugged her post as though it would comfort her, causing the entire bed frame to shake from her shivering. The periwinkle colored kimono she always wore was slipping from her shoulders, the obi around her waist was completely tangled and wrinkled. I glance down, and find there to be dozens of crushed and used tissues at her feet. Yukina… what happened?

She shook her head ever-so slowly from side to side, her minty hair sagging depressively. The lamp in her room shone over the many pearls that were scattered all throughout her sheets, pillows, and blankets. They shimmered dazzlingly around her, throughout her unkempt bed. Her lips parted, but not a word escaped her breath. Genkai moved towards her, taking Yukina into her arms to console her. My little sister sniffs and buries her petite face into Genkai’s garb, the dark blue folds hiding her pale and down-trodden face.

“Gomen ne… Genkai-san…” I hear her speak softly within the fine fabric. “Demo… I’m so lonely, I have no one to talk to…”

The weakness in her voice made me hold-on to the door pane for support. The tears trickling from her deep red eyes, and falling from her chin wouldn’t stop pouring… In opposition, my throat runs dry and thick. I don’t want this for her… I don’t want her to be in any kind of pain!!

“Doishiite? You will be marrying Kuwabara-kun soon… Are you having second thoughts? Are you scared?”

“I am… a little scared… but that’s not what I am afraid of… I… I…” She choked in air.

Genkai leaned in a little more, visage displaying undeniable concern. “Yukina-chan… what is it?”

Yukina clutched onto the old sensei’s shoulders, kimono sliding away from her form totally, revealing her loose white garments. “I have no family to give me away!”

That exclamation earned the crushing of a heart from me. My insides were dug into- an invisible blade stabbing at me. The rapier- lodging and twisting, tearing and ripping. What have I done? Have I become so self-centered that I have forgotten the one person most important to me? The one I vowed to… live for… and protect?

“Ssshh…” Genkai cuddled her, murmuring comfort into her ears. “Don’t be sad… when it’s time for your wedding, you can start a family of your own…”

Yukina hiccups again, and answers back. “I know… I don’t mean to be an inconvenience to you… but it isn’t the same. It’s a lot to ask, yes, but family is the whole point of a wedding… for some reason… I feel someone very close to me should be there… I have no relatives… though… I have a feeling… I’m missing something… or someone…”

Oh…no… Yukina… I…

“My dear… a wedding should be of tears of joy- not grief. All of your friends will be there, for you. We’re your family Yukina, we’re here for you to talk to and listen to.” She paused for a moment in her speech to tidy Imoutochan’s tresses. “ Keiko and Botan are like your sisters, and Kurama and Yusuke are like your brothers… And I …” A thoughtful smile is played across Genkai’s lips. “I am like your grandmother…”

Yukina lightened, and embraced her care-taker and friend. In return, Genkai patted her on the back, and left Yukina to herself. I moved away from the entrance before she could walk threw me and close the door behind her. My sister looks up to the ceiling, eyes sparkling hopefully… and wistful.

“There is someone watching over me… I can feel you… I feel your warmth… You come to me every night… but this time it seems different…” She puts her palms together and shuts her eyes delicately. “I don’t know who you are… still… I love you… God bless you for watching me and my dear friends… Thank-you…” Her eyes open, exposing her beautiful irises- filled with vibrant emotion. Two more tears left the corners of her eyes, congealed into gems, and plunged into her fluffy sheets. The weight of them producing miniature waves of blanketing.

She pulls her legs up from the floor, slipping off her slippers in the process. Imoutochan sits up now, legs folded under her. Apparently, she’s letting herself soar through her own thoughts- we DO have something in common. I walk to Yukina, and seat myself behind her back. My arms are aching to hold her… to take care of her. I can’t touch her… I can’t touch my flesh and blood. I can’t help it… I want to try… Unleashing my upper limbs, I lock them around her. Blinking, I find that I can actually bear her. Yukina didn’t go through me… but there was another price- hugging her was like holding white hot daggers. I don’t care, the anguish is nothing compared to being with my sister.

I notice that Yukina’s lids begin to droop, then finally- they fluttered shut. My hands move to enclose her kimono around her, after that… I begin to stroke her individual strands. The strands chaffed through the skin on my fingers, blood leaching through the cuts. Some of the blood spots the white comforters, then they later fade away from existence. Because of my little sister’s weight, she starts to descend from my chest and lands at my lap. I take a comforter and wrap her tightly within my tight embrace.

The entire night, I held her as so- and never let go. Yukina’s face was no longer drenched in sorrow, she was peaceful. Bending, I kiss my sister nimbly on the forehead. The next thing that took place, lifted my absolute guilt by far… When I straightened my alignment, Yukina whispered in her sleep. What she said will forever be engrained in the far reaches of my soul and heart…

“Oniichan…”