“Let’s Fly as the Birds Do…” Chapter Eighteen

8/16/01

By: Hikari

E-mail: [email protected]

Notes: Please forgive the quality of my recent chapters. I’m trying to beat summer’s end.

Music theme to chapter: “The Sky is Broken” by Moby.

 

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            For you to be the angel you are, I will be the devil himself… That’s how greatly I care…

 

~*~*~*~

 

            Coming into his room, Shiori pulled the blinds. Instantly, light spilled into the small room- painting all four walls pure white. From the glare, Hiei tossed in bed, covering his head with a pillow. Shuiichi’s mother shook her head, observing the many sheets and blankets tousled everywhere. One of the demons pillows was hanging onto the bed by the skin of its teeth- a wonder it hadn’t fallen to the ground already. As for the little one himself, his body was spread out in the most bizarre of angles. Legs hanging off the edge of the mattress, and arms coming out of random places- well one of them was, the other arm was dangling over his head. The woman pulled at the blanket that wrapped Hiei up. She pulled and pulled until he plopped onto the ground. Even then he refused to stand.   

 

            “Hiei, get up. It’s noon- I’ve been generous enough as it is to not have lunch and wait for you…”

 

            “…Five minutes Kurama…” Cute, his eyelids didn’t budge

 

            “Oh, Hiei.” She kneeled down and shook one of his shoulders vigorously. “Wake-up! We’re going out the get you clothes…”

 

            “…I don’t…” He raised an arm- with his eyes still shut- to grab the blanket again. “…need clothes…”

 

            Shiori puckered a brow. “Don’t argue with me, young man… I don’t like having people dress as though everyday were a funeral… It’s too soon to be thinking about the eternal sleep…”

 

            “Che’… Don’t talk with euphemisms…”

 

            ‘Disrespectful…’ She remarked to herself. ‘He needs to be taught…’ “Hiei, if you don’t do what I say, I will not permit you to see ‘Kurama’ at all… And you will STILL have to do the windows and mirrors, whether you like it or not…”

 

            He sat up- face completely muzzy. His eyes were open, but only by a millimeter or two.

 

            “Finally. Now take a shower and get dressed- we’re going to the mall.”

 

            Mall. Extremely BAD word to Hiei’s ears.

 

            “I know what you’re thinking…” Shiori began, breaking up his clouded contemplation. “But I want you to come because I’m concerned… You can’t keep on wearing that old cloak… If you want, we’ll buy a better one. The one you have now looks like it’s seen places…”

 

            ‘More places than you will ever know…’ The demon tried to stand, and when he found his center, went for the bathroom- not noticing Shiori’s hip and fist pose by any means. Quickly brushing his teeth, he prepared his hot shower and stepped in. This was the best way to get up for the morning- shower to get rid of the invisible gunk all over his body. ‘It will be hell today…’

 

*****

 

            The drive to the mall was exceptionally silent. Actually, it was so serene Hiei was about to fall asleep in the passenger’s side of the car. Shiori wouldn’t allow that, however, accordingly she brought up a topic that made the youkai bolt in his chair- even with the seatbelts strapped on…

 

            “What were you and my son fighting about?” Astonishingly enough, her tone was relatively calm. “My door was closed, but even then I could tell you were about to murder one another…  To think I thought granting the two of you some time to yourselves would make you both contented…”

 

            “It is not of your business…”

 

            “It is. He’s my son, and that automatically involves me…”

 

            Hiei snorted and stared out the glass window, watching blurs of buildings and whatnot fly by.  “How protective of you…”

 

            Conscious of the smaller’s family quandary, she strengthened her patience and sorted her words as carefully as most mothers do. “Hiei… You love your sister in spite of the fact she’s practically unreachable, yes?”

            His eyes moved to her for a moment, almost emotionally, and then they blasted back out the moving car. The woman comprehended this gesture as ‘correct’.

 

“So you must be protective of her… How would you feel if someone stole her away? Fell in love with her? Or fought with her?”

 

            “…Hn…”

 

            A gentle ‘hn’. Right, she was making brilliant progress. “The same way as I feel, I hope… That’s why I didn’t banish you from the house although I was given that choice. Shuiichi cares about you… I can see that, but… I don’t see how all this is- is POSSIBLE. That’s why I implement some restrictions- there needs to be discipline…”

 

                 “If you care that much abut him, why do you give Kurama the cold shoulder? Speaking of which, where IS Kurama?”

 

            “He had to leave for Kyoto- school business. Listen; if I don’t act as I do towards him, then he won’t understand that I truly AM disappointed in what he has done… Hiei, I work so hard to do whatever I can for Shuiichi… That’s why I expect him to return the gesture by being sincere with me…It’s not easy being a single mother, especially with all the competition at work these days. It’s difficult to make money and support the two of us… If it were only me, everything would be simple, but I’ve been blessed with a son that I love, and so I must take care of him emotionally and financially… The amount of income I acquire is comparatively low when put next to normal families… That’s why I need Shuiichi to be equally responsible… If he contracts illness with HIV, or- or gets AIDS, what then? I have to pay for medication too? I already have his education and college to think about… His clothes… food… That’s not even including the mortgage of the house! Then there are bills, social security, credit loans, INSURANCE… And what I do for a living… It’s hardly a satisfying job; the hours are lousy, payment fluctuates, I have late nights, I have early rises, I have MILES to drive to get to the office and back home again… but I will gladly do it all for my son… Wouldn’t you be upset if you did all this and what you receive in return is deception? If- if Shuiichi told me the truth the first time I asked… I- I wouldn’t have been this offended…”

 

            Looking at her, Hiei found some tears trickling from her warm eyes and rivering down her smooth cheeks. Her hands rubbed around the steering wheel anxiously, as if trying to burn the anguish she had inside. Unable to remain tight anymore, he undid his arms and allowed himself to have sympathy for her.

 

            “You’ve never told any of this to your son… have you?”

 

            Sniffing as she made a turn to enter the mall’s parking lot, Shiori shook her head. “Gomen nasai… I had to tell someone…”

 

            This he acknowledged full-heartedly. “…Hn… You’re not telling him how hard it is… because you want him to be happy…”

 

            “…Yes…”

 

            He closed his eyes. “Then it should make sense to you that Kurama lied; he didn’t want to hurt you with the truth, therefore he gave you a lie. Likewise, you don’t tell him about your difficulties because you don’t want to burden your son… Perhaps he knows more about your life than you think… which is why he refuses to let you know whatever err you assume he has committed.”

 

            The woman seemed to gasp to herself as she drove around for a parking space. Finding one, she stopped the car and leaned her forehead against the steering wheel. Keeping his eyes on her, the demon permitted her sob quietly. Her back shook faintly as she let herself rupture- some salty water hitting the dashboard and horn as quietly as raindrops.

 

            “…I fought with Kurama last night for the very same reason… I didn’t understand why he kept his wounds to himself, but now I do… He hates sharing his pain…” Hiei took time to consider what he said, spitting at the hypocrisy. ‘You paradox…’ the youkai thought. ‘One minute you bawl, the next you shut yourself from everyone… You talk, and yet you say nothing… You’re composed, but can no longer tolerate the control… Kurama, you’re not making sense!’

 

*****

 

            The station was bustling with people who had to go here and there, in circles, and back. The doors to the cars slid open to reveal men and women with briefcases, mothers and fathers with children, relatives from distant cities, provinces, so on and so forth. The redhead made sport of counting how many people carried cell phones. After a half an hour of waiting in the lobby, he estimated that approximately forty-seven percent of the people there had the silly device, and if they didn’t, they had either a palm top or a pager- the most primitive of mechanics. Sitting on the bench was a bore. People were always running around, babbling on and on on whatever communicating apparatus they had. People were picking up their luggage, complaining to attendants, dropping by food or newspaper stands- everyone was just always on the move. It made his head spin.

 

            Noisy. Endless clamoring. Every two seconds the sound of a convenience locker would slam, and after another two seconds- a random locker would be opening.

 

            “Train 538 for Kyoto will now be boarding. Train 538 for Kyoto will now be boarding.”

 

            ‘Everything is mechanical…’ Kurama mused. ‘Click-click-click. Organization by chaos…’ Picking up his bag, he walked for his train, and displayed his ticket to the conductor. From there he settled in a seat by a windowpane to make most of his trip and enjoy the scenery. The redhead had a small book with him in order to minimize the monotony as much as possible. It took quite a bit of will on his part not to start reading in the station- lest he finished the book before the departure even took place. A shrug escaped his breath. That’s it; he wasn’t going to wait around any longer. He reached into the breast pocket of his jacket and pulled the paperback out. Doing this, his wallet fell onto the floor- coincidentally opening to the telltale picture from the amusement park. Kurama grinned sadly, bending over in his chair to pick his possession up. Gazing into the photo, his grin widened into a sorrowful smile.

 

            “It seemed so long ago…” The redhead whispered.

 

*****

 

            “Oh, this is a LOVELY shirt… Hiei, we’ll get this for you too…”

 

            “That’s what you said about the LAST ten shirts you bought…” Hiei grumbled, carrying bulging bags that stretched out both of his underdeveloped arms to gorilla dimensions. “My limbs are going to tear from their sockets!”

 

            Shiori turned to him and gave him a light and semi-humorous glower. “You’re lucky I’m not taking you along with me for crockery hunting- otherwise I would have you carry around a new rice cooker… Come now, Hiei, you’ve been kind enough to come, and kind enough to be square with me, it wouldn’t hurt if you indulge in a little shopping…”

            His teeth started gritting against each other treacherously. “…There’s NOTHING I want…” the demon murmured through his fangs.

 

            “I don’t believe that…” The woman challenged. “At any rate, I recently promised myself to get you one thing from the Armani Exchange. So I hope you will actually take the time to choose something you like…”

 

            Hiei glared. His glare wasn’t focused on anything in particular, but he was clearly shooting flames through the pupils of his eyes. They had been walking around the place for hours racked upon hours. The little one’s feet were not only numb with plodding around, but hot from friction alongside his shoes. He was sure he was forming blisters. If only they could walk faster instead of continuing in this stop, go, quicker, slower pace. There wasn’t a store they went to where they left empty handed. On contraire, they had the minimum of two purchases per shop. To top it off, Hiei had to bear the whole lot of items. Lugging around Shiori’s perfume was exceptionally tricky, as he couldn’t risk smashing the bottle against a wall, corner, or anything that could break glass.

 

            Entering the next destination, which Hiei prayed- as many times before- would be the last, Shiori jump-started to roam throughout. Her fingers tapped all the materials, feeling the cloth, fancying the buttons, and examining the price tags. Finely shaped eyebrows would rise in content of good deals, and they would collapse at highway robbery. All the while Hiei tagged along, the fingers of his hands turning bright red from the chafing of thin handles and weight combined. He dragged himself to wherever Shiori strolled off to, often skimming around for a God merciful couch, footrest, bench, or armchair to get into. No such luck here in the Armani Exchange. The available seats there of were already occupied by poor husbands, children, and boyfriends ready to commit suicide.

 

            Shuiichi’s mother went ahead, looking at the lavish silk ties or preppy vests on display at a mahogany table. The demon exhaled deeply though his nostrils, growing more and more fed up by the minute. That was, until something on a mannequin caught the corner of his eye. His interest being tugged, hiei left his accomplice’s side and walked toward it. The mannequin was in one of the indentures of the store- where lights hit it from many angles and it was surrounded by three elegant mirrors to see all the sides and the back of the outfit while viewing from the front. Hiei blinked.  

 

            “Black trench coat… Very nice.” Shiori spoke up, coming from behind him. “Look at that- a handsome collar, matching cloth belt with silver buckle… The shape of it is impressive too. Dignified shoulders, tapers at waist, and then it flows freely from under the belt…”

 

            “It’s expensive…”

 

            “Not really,” She assured. “It’s quite off season- it IS spring… It should be on sale.”

 

            “And if it isn’t?”

 

            An appearance analogous to a fox crossed her features. “I’m a woman and a mother. I know how to pull strings…”

 

            For the first time today- or in eons for that matter, Hiei smiled warmly. Something like that took Shiori off guard, but she was more than happy to witness it.

 

            “Ah, so CAN do things with your face…”

 

            “…Hn…” He smiled a little more, trying to hide his face by looking down- this was embarrassing.

           

            Having one of the clerks get them a size extra small- to which Hiei said nothing when the employee asked for whom the coat was for- they later filed in line to pay for the item. The number of customers was outrageous- standing in the far back of the line definitely dreadful. Gradually, gradually, they inched their way to the counter. The demon had questioned the idea of taking a break from standing and sitting on the floor, but from seeing many little human brats do that- he discouraged the concept. When they were finally third to be checked out, a teenager suddenly stepped in between him and the one next to be served. Patience worn, Hiei put down the bags and grabbed the boy by the shoulder.

 

            “Go to the back like everyone else… I am NOT going to wait for one more person.”

 

            “Hey! Hey! It’s cool… Just give me a break today.”

 

            Irritated, the youkai drew him closer and pointed to the back of the file. “Go, NOW.”

 

            At his mercy, the boy held onto Hiei’s wrists timidly to alleviate the annoyance. Unfortunately for him, it only made it worse as Hiei’s scowl intensified. His eyes wondering powerlessly, it then dawned on the stranger as to whom this person was.

 

            “It’s… It’s you- Shuiichi’s lover boy!”  He almost laughed though he was at risk of choking. “You’re that little toy of his! Shit man! You really ARE as short as in the picture!”

 

            “Don’t you DARE speak to him that way, young man!” Shiori removed Hiei’s securely clasped hand from around the boy’s shirt. He was relieved, but too soon for the woman grabbed him by the ear and twisted the top of it enough to make him kneel on the tiles.

 

            “Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!”       

 

            “I would be so ashamed if you were my child! Not only are you rude, but you don’t know when to quit!”

 

            The crowd of people from behind began to laugh.

 

            “Ow! Ow! Ow! Please let go! Ow! Ow! Ow!”

 

            “Not until you apologize to me and everyone here waiting in this store.”

 

            “Okay lady! Ma’m! I’m sorry! Really!”

 

            She let go, and he stood then ran out the exit completely deflated in pride and sore from his ear. As he left, muttering and cursing could be heard from his lips- people watching him go in shame of his stupidity.

 

            “It seems you have a very good arm…” Hiei granted.

 

            “Well, to tell you the truth, I’ve never had to do that with any children before- including my son. I suppose it was instinct…”

 

*****

 

            “You’re late.”

 

            “Yeah, I know- some bitch caught me at the mall...”

 

            Haruhiko raised his head and rolled his eyes over contemptuously. “You idiot.  Now I won’t be able to collect my package directly. Don’t you know interregional exchange is hard to do? If I lost out on this, I’m beating your ass down.”

           

            The other rubbed his ear briskly- the whole thing was turning bright red. “Damn it- and I thought beats from step dad were bad, the bastard…”

 

            “Cut the whining, Tetsuji.” Haru blanched- closing his eyes and leaning against one of the walls in the alley. “What’s important right now is making sure the package made it here safely. Since we’re late, most likely we can pick up the stuff at the station… I know some guys in Kyoto to cover the interest we put in, so we can depend on that much as a fallback if something goes wrong…” He ceased his speech to look at Ito, Tetsuji again. “Fuck, who got to you?”

 

             “Keh’ Shuiichi’s mom- no less…”

 

            A grunt- quickly followed by a cruel chuckle.  “First her fag of a son gets your brother in the ribs, and now she gets you herself. You have pretty sad genes in your family…”

 

            “Urusei! When Kao recovers…I swear…”

 

            “You a-hole. You don’t know what you’re talkin’ about…” Nonchalantly, he took a cigarette from his pocket and lit to take a drag.   

 

            “Hey, when I say my word- I go by it.”

 

****

            Once paying for the merchandise, they walked directly for their car in the lot- Shuiichi’s mother pledging to Hiei that the last shop they were in would be the finale of this entire ordeal. The woman retrieved her keys from her purse, and jingled them with her long hands to flip to the proper one. Unlocking the doors, Hiei dumped everything in the back except for the box that had his personal selection. When all the bags were taken care of, the smaller opened the passenger’s door and sat in front with the package at hand settling upon his lap.

 

            Uncovering the box, Hiei unfolded the tissue to reveal his new cloak. He touched it, and his fingers instantly approved of the polish. The material was incredibly soft, and thin too for light weight and easy movement. What’s more, the garment was unbelievably pressed- sleek and clean. There were no tatters, no tears or loose thread- it was perfect in every way. This was real attire. Whatever garb, scarf, shirt, and the like the smaller had were either stolen or made by his own hand with, again, stolen material. But this, this fabulous coat was his. He didn’t thieve it. He didn’t even earn it. It was given to him. The lone detail Hiei needed to do was ask, and there it was, in his hands.  Out of the blue, the youkai couldn’t stroke it any longer- his hands felt fiery. Something was amiss. There’s certain wrong here that he couldn’t put his finger on.         

 

            “Why? Why are you giving all this to me, when Kurama is the one being punished?”

 

            “Because… I don’t know you well enough to be able to chastise you severely. I hardly know you, Hiei… How can I be so angry with you if I don’t know how you were raised? If I don’t know your values? I brought up Shuiichi- he is a part of me… Therefore I know what to expect of him, but you- ”

 

             “I am just as responsible for the sin as HE is!” The demon interrupted in a very sharp cut. “Don’t put all the blame on him for losing his chastity! Simply because he is your son…” Hiei didn’t like it- her explanation. It wasn’t fair. It was immoral to him.

 

            “Hiei…” She consoled.

 

            “I DON’T want this…” His hands moved to put the lid back on top of the box. “ANY of this… Take it all back!”

 

            “Hiei! It’s a necessity to have clothes! I’ve punished you fairly enough by restricting your freedom, why won’t you let me get to know you?!”

 

            “And you do so by showering me with materials?” Snapping his eyes onto the rearview mirror, they widened in shock at the entire load of purchases. How did this take place? Did he lose his sense? Blinking zealously- an upsurge of realization struck him. Did he relish being spoiled for one day? The demons slick black hair flew from side to side as he shook his head to exile the thought.

“ Why do you pity me?” He ensued. “I will not tolerate pity!”

 

            “Is it really so wrong for me to be generous to you?” Shiori asked, now affronted by this boy’s ungratefulness. “Hiei, you don’t have anything at all! Evidently no home, no possessions- and you said yourself: no family! Why? I don’t understand how this can be… Didn’t your mother- ”

 

            “I’ve never HAD a mother! I’ve never had her arms! Nothing! Don’t EVER speak of her!”