I sit in class
ignoring words from the teachers
staring at a blank paper
with a pen in hand
as I stare at a wall.
But I see thru it.
I see thru everything.
Transcending human reality
to realms of impossible being.
There I see a red flower
growing out of a star.
The budding roses, each petal
slowly unraveling
opening itself to me.
What is inside
I wait to see�
�a key.
A door appears
locked, of course.
So I use the key,
but the door doesn�t
open.
Such sadness fills me.
What is behind that door!!
I shout from the top of
the cliff I stand.
A mile up in the sky
from an ocean.
Hey, it�s a waterfall.
Jump into the nearby stream
and let the current take
me over the fall.
Down the cheeks
of a little girl
with beautiful curly hair
and a cute red dress.
She cries though.
a small girl
who�s only lived
5 years.
Yet her tears have
flowed centuries
I want to help her
hold her
and end her misery.
But my own sorrow
keeps me from her
I must walk away
into the darkness
hearing the sobs and
her tears hitting the ground,
with each of my
own footsteps.
Where is my right
What permission do I have
to live?
Why can I laugh
when a 5 year old
is forced to cry?
I collapse�
fall to the ground
return to the fetal position
and back into my
mother.
let me exist in the place
of concepts�
exist in the non existence
of prelife.
Prelife�so similar to the after life.
I miss it.
I cant define what IT is
but I know I do.
A piece of my heart
begs for it.
The same thing the little girl
cries for, I Suppose
I wonder what it is.