| TWO BIKES, ONE�S FAITH IN HUMANITY, LOST by a. fish |
| two bikes have disappeared outside of Al Fish�s manufactured home in Suburban Estates Trailer Park. They are believed to have been...STOLEN! Al claims that if the stolen bikes are found he would be happy to have them returned to him. However, if anyone finds his lost faith in humanity, they can, to quote Al, �keep the damn thing, it�s caused me nothing but heartache and disappointment. I swear it�s a bigger pain in the ass than those disturbingly slender seats the two bikes had.� �The first bike I didn�t lock up all summer, but it didn�t get stolen until after the first snow fall, when I had locked it up for the winter! As for the second one, I had it for about 3 weeks when...HEY! That�s less than a freakin� MONTH,dude!!� It is at this point in the interview that Al Fish of Vermillion was asked by this reporter, first politely and then more and more adamantly, to stop his crying because it was �creeping� the aforementioned reporter �out!� When the reporter�s admonishments were ignored, it was suggested that the interview be terminated and reconvene over some brewskis. The alcohol seemed to affect the crying jags only by increasing their duration, frequency and intensity. It is then that the reporter ditched him by claiming he needed to go out and put money in the parking meter but , instead, got into his car and drove off to finish this story and a 6 pack without the crybaby. (I mean, jeez...suck it up and walk it off, bitch! Oh yeah, F.Y.I., skank, VERMILLION DOESN�T HAVE PARKING METERS!!!) |
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| Al points to area where bikes and belief in common decency were snatched away from him. use cursor to point at him pointing at the crime scene and see an artist's rendition of what it is believed to have looked like back when Al was still a naive sap. |