| Oozing Bad Attitude 7 February 2002 Dear Sisters I know I have in past times 'gone on' a bit about my role in and what I have to do for our small business. I thought I would mention this to you, as there may be some of you doing what you never thought you would be doing. Perhaps you may be struggling to do something that may be so undesirable to you, yet necessary for your family. When I left school, I never, ever wanted to work in an office, have a job working with numbers, or any type of bookwork. It's funny how things work out. You can never say "never", can you? The Lord had different plans for me. What He had planned was that I should be a help meet for my husband in whatever way I could fulfil a need. That 'need' happened to be as the administrator of my husband's business. Well, I say 'my husband's' business, even though my sweetheart often reminds me it is 'our' business. Perhaps that has been part of my problem. My attitude problem. I've never thought of Engineering as 'my' business before. After all ~ a huge workshop with heavy machinery, oils and grease, grinding dust, noise, wires, rods, hand tools and cold steel ~ can't be decorated, refurbished, re-arranged, painted, draped, carpeted and given a 'country' look, can it? Ha! For so long, I have struggled with the bookkeeping side of our business. My children have told me that mamma is 'missing in action' on paperwork days. Not because I have been lost in the sea of paper, but because I have been 'unapproachable';~ flustered, aggravated and annoyed! They have never told me in so many words, but on reflection, I know this is what they see. Without fully realising the consequences, I've oozed bad attitude. I have portrayed an image to my children that I can only hope and pray they do not follow! Oh, and may the Lord forgive me! I've created a feeling of being dissatisfied, unwilling, ungrateful.... My dear husband took me aside ~ "Doll, do you realise what you are doing?" "No, what?" (can't you 'hear' the attitude?) "You're being ungrateful. If you don't start appreciating what the Lord has given us, He may take it away". Oh my! I thank the Lord for His way of teaching me. For knowing exactly *what* will bring me to repentance...... And so, dear Sisters, I have asked forgiveness from my Father, and from my husband. I have asked the Lord to help me understand the concept of accounting. He has blessed me so much! He has given me a new fervour to accomplish our business books. He has taught me method and application. I cannot begin to tell you how much I have been learning from Him. He has changed my attitude. He has opened my eyes so that I can take a 'whole' look at our business figures, instead of dragging through each month's transactions, not knowing (caring) where we were heading. He has taught me order. He has taught me discipline. I have so much further to go, with the Lord's help. But this is a start. A new beginning. Another heartchange. Every heartchange can be new, inspiring and encouraging. Every heartchange can bring momentum. For the next, and the next.... May I encourage you to seek Him if you are struggling in any area of your life. It is no good whining and complaining and 'oozing'. You may have little sets of eyes, watching you, learning from you. It's better to call on the Lord from the start, without travelling the lonely road yourself. Perhaps even dragging loved ones with you as you take wrong turns....ouch! Bless you, dear Sisters. May all that you do be with a good attitude 'as unto the Lord'. With love from Helen |